Private School - Tacoma,WA

Does your husband object to the private school she wants, or "just" the pricetag?

I ask, because many private schools have financial aid (and both parent's incomes -gross- are considered). So be prepared for that "counter argument".

You will need to present your case;

- School ratings (from ideally 2 different sources)
- What you are currently paying (total, & broken down into categories) and what percentage of your husband's salary it already is
- What you would be paying under
a) Full tuition for both boys
b) Scholarship adjusted tuition for both boys
c) "extras" that the school requires (some private school require children order from their catering service which an average total is $10 per day per child. aka an extra $400-$500 per month, others require laptops, field trip cash, book purchases, uniforms, etc.)
d) changing childcare needs and costs (afterschool programs through the Y! can actually cost more than fullday programs, and need to be researched/factored in
e) what percentage of your husband's salary adding a private school would create (both under scholarship and full price)
f) APPLICATION COSTS (most people apply to 2-4 private schools, the applications alone usually run about $100 a pop, and that's if testing isn't required. Testing easily being $250+. DO factor in application and testing costs into your analysis. 1 application for both boys is probably going to be $200-$450 depending on whether or not testing is required)

And anything else your lawyer would like for you to present

In order for you to actually present the numbers, you would need the name of the private school, so that you can go through their tuition, fees, & scholarship info.

In OUR area, just a bit north of you, private elementariness average 9k-15k per year (middle & high = 15k-35k per year).

It's going to make a HUGE difference in your numbers to have the "short list" of schools she's considering.

EX) 15k per year school = 30k for both boys = 3k per month (10 month school year). Double what your husband brings home. Even if he only had to pay "half" that's still EQUAL to what your husband brings home. Half of THAT (scholarship) is STILL not enough to feed a family on, much less house them.

NO judge is going to put you in a homeless shelter on food stamps to send 2 children to private school.

HOWEVER, if the numbers break out to only a couple hundred extra per month (if scholarships and reduced childcare expense -GET THOSE CHANGED CHILDCARE EXPENSES!!!, people frequently argue they go down, but they frequently increase), it's highly likely.

Your Husband has to build his case.
Build it and lay it out all on paper, and put his ducks all in a row, as the previous poster said. And present that all, to the Mediator.

The Ex, is relying on him, to pay for it, the private school.
And also being a snit about it.
As you said, a top public school is right across the street from her.

Get a Lawyer.

I don't think a judge in their right mind would order private school...but crazier things have happened.

Make sure you have all your ducks in a row...show how good the school is across the street...

GOOD LUCK!!!

Doubtful. If neither parent can afford it, and the children were not already in private school before the divorce, then it would be hard to justify forcing a man to pay money that he doesn't have for this luxury.

Read the divorce decree very carefully to make sure that their mother really has 100% say in educational decisions. Consult a lawyer. It would be worth the price of a consultation to get peace of mind about this and leverage for telling their mother that she is going to have either make public school work for them or she'll need to get a different job and cover the cost herself.

Well, I think the ex would have to show financial aid support or scholarships for the boys. Which it sounds like they might qualify for. You need to be prepared for this and show the cost of other things at private schools. Gas money, if husband is driving and no buses, uniform costs, volunteer hours (which I know the private schools around me require and if you can't volunteer, you have to donate money), and other hidden costs. Do your research and do it thoroughly and hopefully, the judge will be on your side :)

Riley J seems to have it all laid out for you. Very good advise. I had my daughter go to private Kindergarten because public school was only half day. Cost me $500.00 per month for 10 months $5000.00. I got off pretty cheap & had a great school. Had to do 40 hours of volunteering & the school was always "fund raising" if we didn't raise enough money in the fund raiser they added the minimum amount to our tuition. Private schools have quirks.