Pregnant and 46 - Murrieta,CA

I had a client who was 46 (and her husband was 58) when she became pregnant for the first time! She thought she was starting menopause, but instead she had an unmedicated birth of her beautiful, healthly baby girl.

Don't worry about the statistics ... YOU are NOT a statistic :)

Happy Birthing :)

I would stay healthy and don't stress on it! I was 17 when I had my son and he came out with some disabilites and my daughter that I had when I was 22 also has some developmental delays, it doesn't always matter about age or healthy lifestyle

NOOO Don't worry! I wasted a lot of my pregnancy worrying --when I totally didn't need to.
I got pregnant at 44 delivered at 45 and had a VERY NORMAL everything--even better than normal. I was in great shape, look and act young for my age, --sounds like the same for you...after the amnio, my doc said I was no longer high risk since all was normal. He didn't treat me any different either. He kept asking me "why do you worry so much?", well it was my first and I just did, but that little 16 mo. old totally healthy baby girl I love every day was worth every minute of it. Best of luck to you!

Well if down syndrome is a concern I can tell you all about that. I have a daughter with down syndrome and she is the light of my life and I could not imagine my life without her. God only gives us what we can handle, so have faith and know that every child no what is a gift. Feel free to e-mail me at ____@____.com if you have any more questions.

M., in this day and age, we often have much more information at our disposal than we necessarily need. Take everything you read with a grain of salt. Though risks of genetic defects are higher than in younger women, I believe this is only because so many more younger women have babies than older women, and thus the abnormalities stick out like a sore thumb. Plus, I'm convinced that a women who gets pregnant naturally at your age (as opposed to IVF, or other invasive procedures) is pregnant for a reason: because nature (God, or whatever you believe in) has decided it to be in the best interests of all involved.

Keep reading about everything, just to stay informed and educated, but don't assume that you're not going to have a healthy baby, if you are indeed pregnant. Good luck!

Hi M.

I am 46 and have a 2 year old son. He was definitely a surpise at my age and surely a blessing. I have 4 older children...25, 22, 19 & 16. I never expected to have a baby at my age! Like you I was concerned about alot of things. Just continue to take care of yourself, make sure you take your vitamins (folic acid is important) and go to your Dr. Appointments. I was nervous having to see a genetic counselor and to have an Amnio but everything turned out great, he's a healthy 2 year old. Good luck to you and God Bless you.

I had our 5th child, a daughter, 13 yrs after our 4th child. Planned, yes, but they still considered me "an elderly multip". Not very flattering, but oh well. We only had the sonogram at 16 wks to check for downs. She is a perfectly normal, healthy little 6 yr. old now. The pregnancy went very smoothly and she is loved by all of her older siblings, and her niece and 2 nephews. (The oldest daughter at the time of Molly's birth was 21, then 17, then 15, then 13. All of the kids were there for her birth. ) Good luck, and enjoy the blessing.

A good friend of mine delivered her first at age 49, and will be delivering twins either at the end of March or the beginning of April at age 54. My suggestion is to keep all your pre-natal appointments, and take all your vitamins, especially the folic acid.

Honey, I am 47 yrs old and have a 16 yr old and a 3 yr old! Both lovely girls. Listen to me and listen to me carefully...
YOU WILL BE FINE. You think that way, act that way, speak that way, listen to no one who says otherwise, with the exception of an M.D. A REAL M.D. not a P.A. or R. N.
Do all the tests they do. Go in there smiling and demand happy back!
There are things people can say about pregnancies this age, and things they say about pregnancies at 17.
It is different doing it in our 40's that's for sure. There are more physical aches and pains and fatigue as the first years go by. It is trying, but when isnt it? A mommy is a mommy, and if you are a good one you will be just that, again. Patience, my dear friend. Prayer and lots of patience, and you will be elated.

xo

Wendy

My good friend, was 46 when she was pregnant with her 2nd child. She was perfectly fine. Not high-risk, no problems with herself or the baby while pregnant, she worked until she was 2 weeks before her due date, and her baby was fine and healthy and normal. She delivered vaginally, and everything went smoothly.

In her case, she did not opt for an amniocentesis. Just her personal 'fear' of needles.

If you are healthy, and fit and eat healthily... I am sure you will be fine. Just make sure you take your prenatal vitamins.

Go according to your OB/GYN. Nowadays, it is not uncommon to be pregnant at this age. It does not mean you will have problems. But discuss any questions with your Doctor. And the genetic testing.

All the best,
Susan

No, and I say that for several reasons. Yes, your age does put you at higher risk for having a child with Down's but that's a "risk," not a "guarnatee." You can carry this child beautifully through the entire pregnancy and deliver a beautiful, healthy child. Everything can turn out to be just right. This pregnancy is about you and you are not a statistic. It is just too bad that when all of the periodicals, books and news reports do all of this negative reporting, they don't counter balance this info with the positive stuff as well.

The second reason why I do not believe that you should spend another moment being overly concerned about the risks associated with conceiving a child when you are older is because I highly believe that when a woman is pregnant, if she is under an inordinate amount during the pregnancy, it can have a negative impact on the development of fetus. And I believe that there maybe medical studies supporting this as well. Now is the time that you need to be optimistic and keep your cool for you and your baby. Deal with reality, sure, but stay optimistic and hopeful as much as you can. Enjoy your pregnancy, because that's what your child needs from you at this time for his/her development.

Lastly, your child will be your child no matter if he/she has dark straight hair or blonde curly hair, and whether he/she is born with medical issues or is born without any obvious signs of disabilities. Hopefully, you will love that child just the same.

First of all, you should get a firm confirmation if you are pregnant or not. Even a home test would be a good start. I had my first child at 45 through IVF so I went through all the rigamaroll about "high risk". At your age, it has NOTHING to do with your healthy lifestyle, whether you look younger than you are, your history of previous successful births, etc. The only thing (I reiterate), the ONLY thing that matters is really the age of your eggs. At 46, it is extremely rare to conceive on your own without fertility assistance. But let's assume that you are pregnant. The fact that you can get pregnant at your age is a extremely rare. My fertility doctor told me that the oldest woman on record of having her own child (using her own eggs) without using fertility assistance was 46. So you would be right up there as a record breaker if you are pregnant. Secondly, the rate of which you are at risk for miscarrying is about 50% if not greater. I don't want to sound negative or rude, but that is what the rates are for a woman over 40. Having said all that, you already know the risk of abnormalities associated with older parents. Because I used a donor egg (she was 29), my OB advised me NOT to have the CVS or amnio to test for abnormalities. Doing so at my age, would have been a high risk for losing the baby. And since we paid so much money for all the treatments, the donor fee, etc., I had to take the risk of not performing those tests. So if you are indeed pregnant, and this is your own egg you are using, I would probably proceed with the CVS or amnio testing if and when it gets to that point. But please, do yourself a favor, and get a real pregnancy test done! Good luck.

First, STOP reading!! DOn't be concerned and let GOd bless you with the miracle of a baby!!

The statistics are heavily skewed because "younger" women will abort when they find out they have an abnormal pregnancy and older women usually wanting a baby so badly will take the blessing and go through with the pregnancy. The aborted babies are not included in the studies!! Does that make sense to you?

God bless you and enjoy your pregnancy, STOP reading and worrying :)
W.

First of all, please take the pregnancy test so that you can know what you are dealing with. Don't listen to what other people say and just follow your heart and do what you feel is best . People with good intentions can sometimes scare the living daylights out of you by what they say and do. Best of luck in your situation.

NO! Remember that the chances of your baby being perfectly fine are much greater than the chances that it will not, despite the fact that risk goes up with age. It is much more important that you remain calm and as unstressed as possible. Do NOT worry, because there is nothing to be gained by worrying; the baby that is in there, is already in there and worry will not change that. However, if you would terminate a pregnancy due to genetic disorder or would use the results in order to be prepared for life with your child, then I would highly recommend the tests. If abortion is not an option, then skip the tests, but definitely get all of the ultrasounds and, as someone mentioned, any tests that will help your delivery team be prepared for the birth.

For me, I was 42 when I had my son (no prior pregnancies, no fertility problems) and I really needed to know whether he had any genetic disorders, so we had an amnio. We had made the decision that we would most likely terminate a Trisomy-18 child (multiple organ defects, 90% die before age 1), but were undecided about what we would do if he were a Trisomy-21 (Down Syndrome) child. For me, I would probably not terminate a Down Syndrome child because, despite their challenges, most are totally capable of participating in a family, of living happy lives and can be perfectly delightful people. This was important to me.

Good luck in whatever you decide and with your pregnancy. I hope you will carry on with minimal stress and worry.

Hi M.,
2 of my girlfriends just had babies at 45/46. They were fine and the babies were fine. I'm 46 also - 46 is like 30 used to be - we're still young and in much better shape and health than our parents/grandparents. But if you think you're pregnant, get tested asap and do whatever tests you need to make sure the baby is healthy.

Good luck! You're going to be tired! I was 40 when my son was born and I'm still exhausted!

Hello M.. first off, congratulations, if you are indeed pregnant :) I just wanted to offer some support. I am pregnant with my 3rd child (my other two are 17 and 13, so this was a surprise after being told I'd never be able to have kids again) and was scared to death, because my due date is one day after my 35th birthday - the dreaded "35 years old" mark. I have done a lot of reading, as I did with my other two, and I have to say, if it's going to happen, it will happen. My aunt had three perfectly healthy baby boys (the oldest turning 40 this year!) and tried for a girl. She got her girl, but found out she had spinal meningitis, and developed Downs syndrome. My aunt was in her 20's when my cousin was born. Of course, there are so many other factors, Down's is not the only risk, but it is one of the highest for our age group. I say, find out for sure if you are pregnant, then have all the necessary tests done. You will be warned in advance, and able to better cope with any possible "negative" outcomes, although I believe that all babies are blessings, and God only gives us what we can handle, so I don't look at it in a negative light. But, I just wanted to share that I am scared myself, even though I know I shouldn't be. We'll find out in about 6 weeks if there was cause for concern or not. Best of luck to you, and go get that test done to find out for sure!!! :)

Hi M.,

You've already received so many great responses, but I just wanted to add one more positive story to those you've heard from women who had their babies in their 40s.

I was 42 when I gave birth to my son. I had a great pregnancy, and although I had a c-section, in my case, it had nothing to do with my age. I'm 46 now, and my happy, healthy 4 year-old boy is sitting on my lap as I type this!

Just wanted you to hear as many positive real-life stories as possible! Stay healthy and strong and keep positive thoughts!

Best wishes to you and your family!

J.

CONGRATULATIONS!!! I am 45 and gave birth to my 3rd baby at 40. Thinking that "40" was my cutoff for having children, my husband got a vasectomy, however when our daughter was about a year old we thought about how nice it would be to have one more. Going through a reverse vasectomy wasn't what we wanted to do, so we didn't. My point is that if we had of waited on that vasectomy we'd probably have another child! So I say BE HAPPY and don't worry. Just enjoy your pregnancy like a 30 year old would, because there isn't any reason why you shouldn't! I do understand how you feel though, as I had some of the same feelings being pregnant at 40.

You have a gift from God growing inside of you! Many blessing to you and your family.
M.

P.S. My sister is getting married for the first time and is 46. She is planning on getting pregnant right away.

M.,
First off, congratulations! There is just reason to be concerned. However, the doctor will put through some tests, and a screening and let you know just how risky it is for you and your baby. I was 41 when I had my baby, and had to go through all that as well. If you have had healthy births before, and there is no history in yours your husband's families of problems, it's very likely you'll have very low chances of your new baby having defects. You'll go through some nail biting times waiting for results, or having the amniocenteses performed, but you'll do just fine. Even though we did do all the tests, regardless of the results, we would still keep the baby. Don't forget that while you have to go through all the testing, etc... be sure to enjoy the pregnancy!!

Again, congratulations and take care!
L.

Wow, if that's true, then...Congratulations! I wish you all the best :-) My short answer is, 'NO', don't be as concerned as what you read. There are MANY women who have babies in their 40's and the majority of the time things are just fine! An added bonus is that you will probably get much better prenatal care than you would in your 20's or 30's, just for the fact that you are in an older age bracket. And yes, your chances for genetic problems are higher than they are if you were younger. But, the stats are still on your side; most babies are just fine! I would get a PG test done as soon as you can, though. Just to find out what you are dealing with, as many have said here. Try not to worry. Good luck to you!

I got pregnant with my daughter (she's now over 2 years old) at 44 1/2 years old and had her when I was 45. The doctor had me take a progesterine supplement for a while as well as a baby aspirin every day for a while to keep the pregnancy strong and prevent a miscarriage (I had already had 2 miscarriages and one try at artificial insemination). I had an amnio done when I was about 5 1/2 months pregnant. At that time, the doctor thought everything looked normal. However, it was 2 weeks of waiting to see if there were any abnormalities. My daughter was born healthy and I feel very blessed. Also, my sister got pregnant at 43 years old and her son was born healthy.

Congrats!!!! Don't let words like "high risk" scare you. Stay focused, healthy and follow directions. If God wants you to have this baby, He will watch over it and you. I think you are truely blessed to have the opportunity to bring another child into the world.

First, confirm that you are pregnant so that you will know what you are dealing with. At 46 you could very well be going through peri menopause. Lots of women think that's what it is, when they are actually pregnant.

I don't agree with sticking your head in the sand and not listening to anyone. It isn't all gloom and doom, but you do need to be realistic at your age. Also, everyone is mentioning Down's Syndrome, but there are plenty of other trisomies to be concerned about. A friend was 42 when she lost one twin to T-18. A good friend had her Down's baby when she was just 20, so age isn't the only factor. Just be informed about the risks, what your odds are, what tests you can take if you want to. I think being informed is the smartest thing.

I had my first child at 46 using donor eggs. The whole pregnancy and delivery was a breeze and I worked right up until I delivered. Now I am pg. with twins and will be 51 in less than 2 weeks. This is a very different pregnancy because I am old (as my OB jokingly says) and I am having twins. It's definitely different. I am being monitored closely by my OB because a month or so ago I had protein in my urine and high blood pressure, so was at risk for developing pre-eclampsia. Appt. last week showed no protein in my urine, passed my glucose screening tests and both babies look great. At age 45/46, I wasn't monitored as closely because I did very well. Also had a very easy delivery. A lot of it just depends upon the individual, and every pregnancy - even for the same woman - is going to be different, just like the delivery.

I know some awesome books loaded with positive advice that you might dig. Birthing From Within, Ina May's Guide To Childbirth, The Pregnant Woman's Comfort Book, Painless Childbirth. Mothering Magazine has a lot of insightful advice for parents. No, I don't think you need to be as concerned as what you read. There was a midwife here in my city who gave unmedicated natural birth to triplet girls at age 53. May you and your family thrive.

Hi M.,
If you listen to what "they" say, they'll have you scared to death. I was almost 39 when I had my son, and they treated me like I was a dinosaur. Even the way that information was presented during the genetic counseling was quite fear based. Even though the chances were higher that my child would be normal, they presented numbers in a way that sounded horrifying. I only did minimal testing, as I decided to focus on doing what I could to create a healthy environment for my baby. Moms have enough that they naturally worry about without being scared at every turn.
Many women are having babies at older ages now, and if you're healthy, then you're doing great, so just keep on with being healthy and focusing on a healthy baby. Educate yourself on what you need to, don't obsess with it and don't let yourself get sucked into worrying. I'm sure you know this, but be sure to start taking prenatal vitamins now, just in case.
Take care,
M.

Don't know much about the risks of your age but I got pregnant with my 3rd at age 36 I was condisered high risk but decided not to have any tests done because they are never 100% accurate and I knew for myself I wouldn't abort so why waste all my time worrying. My son was perfectly normal. I wanted to also add my other two kids where 12 & 9 when I had my third and it has been WONDERFUL. The only negative I have had is people always assumming it was a MISTAKE (God doesn't make mistakes) and yes it was the same husband!! Good luck go take a test and you will know for sure. If you are CONGRATULAIONS!!

The high risk has to do with the age of your eggs not your personal physical health. The older you are over 35 the more likely you are to have a Down's Syndrome child. Most children born to women in their 40s are just fine. If you are really concerned there are some early blood tests that can be done prior to an amniocentesis, but that is still the most reliable way to know if you have a child with a severe genetic defect. My cousin had her 3rd child at 46. The child is normal, but she's nuts. My greataunt had her two children in her 40s. My sister-in-law had two in her 40s. All these kids are normal. Small sample size but my daughter's mother-in-law's friend had quads at 49, all normal. So, there you go. You probably should talk to a specialist about your options for peace of mind. Good luck and let us know how it goes.

Hi M., more and more woman are having babies at the "high risk" age. I guess you should probably be open minded to the fact that there could be a possibility to an abnormal child, but I wouldn't worry yourself to death.

Anything after 35 is considered high risk and I was 38 when I was pregnant with our daughter. They offered many tests to see if the baby was abnormal and the only ones I allowed was the blood test and the millions of ultra sounds to watch babies growth patterns. We decided against the amnio because hubby and I discussed it and we decided if the baby had any type of abnormalities, we would deal with it. I asked since we both held the same value/attitude about it, why we should still have it done and he said to be prepared. I had to squeeze the info out of him, but I guess he didn't only mean for us to be mentally prepared, but if there was something that could be caught they could have the specialist on hand at the delivery should there be some sort of abnormality. We decided against the risk of losing the baby during the amnio just to be prepared for something that wasn't showing up in any sort of blood test as of yet. Tada! baby was born fine. All the testing is just a personal choice, but in the mean while don't you worry so much and prepare yourself for your new addition. Congrats!

Just stay positive. Take good care of yourself and your baby. The numbers are supposed to be higher risk-wise, but ultimately God makes that call. I am 35 and just found out I'm pregnant too. The numbers are not as scary for me but it does weigh on me- I just try not to dwell on it and focus on staying healthy also. Good luck too you.

Hi M.,
Not only is your baby at risk, but so are you. For example I had a very close friend conceive at 43 and she was like yourself...picture of healh - rarely even took an aspirin for a headache. However, she did develop gestational diabetes and very high blood pressure. I think signs showed up in her 4th month ro so. She was a stickler for keeping her OB appointments, and spent the last month of her pregnancy in the hospital. Not saying it will happen to you, but there are things you need to be checked for frequently..I would get to that GYN PDQ!! Also, and not to put a dimmer on things, but you are also at the age where perimenal menapause can kick in. Best of Luck to you..hope all works out the way you want it to!

Hi M.,

Congrats on your pregnancy!

I have one child conceived when I was 42 and delivered when I was 43. I was considered high risk because of my age.

I chose NOT to have the amniocentesis because the miscarriage rage of 1 in about 150 was just too high for me and I knew I was not going to terminate the pregnancy, even if the test indicated downs syndrome or another problem.

I did have the extra blood work done (I think its called the AFP) and I had the high-resoultion ultrasound done as well.

After genetic counseling, I was told I had a 90% chance of a healthy baby, which is exactly what I got :)

Trust yourself and do what is right for you, regardless of what anyone else tells you. You and your family need to be comfortable with the decisions you make, and your own intuition is a very good guide.

Yes, the risk for problems may be more than for a 25 year old, but many women in their 40's are delivering healthy, happy babies.

I wish you all the best.

Blessings,
R.

I just read your post. What was the outcome? Are you pregnant? I am 46 also and pretty sure I am to. Would like to get feed back from you if possible. Such as, how you are feeling and your plans for life, etc.

You have gotten great responses already but wanted to give you one more positive results story. My MIL had my hubby at 44 and he turned out perfect (if you ask me). And we are talking he was born in 1972! Well before any of the wonderful prenatal care we have available to us today. I say take advantage of the advances in prenatal care and you and your baby will be fine. Stress is the last thing you and your baby need right now! Good luck and congrats!

Hello

this is a blessing - I just turned 45 and have a 18yr old and a 2 and a half yr old - still hoping to have another one God willing

do not listen to all these abnormalities stories - you will be fine - continue to eat healthily.

Gob Bless xx A.

Hi, M.,

I was 40 and almost 42 when I delivered my two children. I worried, too. You are doing the right things by eating a healthy diet and trying to maintain a generally healthy lifestyle. However, even though you may look and feel as though you are ten years younger than your chronological age (good for you, by the way!), your eggs, like everyone else's, are no younger than your chronological age. The age of one's eggs is a much more significant determinant of how the pregnancy will turn out than how one looks, e.g. the number of wrinkles on one's face or number of gray hairs on one's head. That being said, from the statistics I've seen at my perinatologist's (high-risk OB/GYN's) office, even though our pregnancies were/are higher risk than those of twenty-year-olds, the chance that our offspring will be abnormal is NOT greater than the chance that our offspring will be normal, assuming that I have recalled the charts for 46-year-old mothers correctly and you are not prone to some risk that you have not mentioned. Knowing that fact, I relaxed more about my pregnancies. One of my sons has a congenital nevus (mole) on his leg that I hope to get removed in a few years. Other than that, both of my children seemed to have no defects at birth.

I think that the big question is whether you want to undergo tests, such as an amnio, for deformities or disabilities, e.g. Down Syndrome. If living with a disabled child is unacceptable to you, then you should probably have these tests done. If not, then you may or may not want to have these tests done. I, with the support of my husband, elected not to. He and I decided that we would accept whatever type of child was born.

Good luck,
Lynne E

I am 46 and pregnant how did it turn out

So how did everything go ? I am 46 and feel i might be preg. I am scared to death.

First of all I don't think using the term "abnormal child" is appropriate. Maybe something like a child with special needs would be a little nicer.

2nd to Valerie S...you don't devolp down syndrome from spinal meningitis. Down sydnrome happens at conception.

That being said... I do have a son who has down syndrome and I was only 30 when he was concieved and 31 when he was born. He is the joy of our life.

Sitting here reading a bunch of statistics isn't going to put your mind at ease. Confirming your pregnancy would probably be a good start.

I was 42 when I had my first, healthy son. I will be 46 in May and we are going to try to do it again. I have very high fertility, which is a plus, but my egg quality was poor as evidenced by 2 losses prior to my son's arrival. All I can say is that you should prepare yourself in case there is a problem, but expect good things. Although there are increased eggs with problems, there are also still good quality eggs in there as well. I recommend CVS or Amnio. We will do the CVS this time as one can do it sooner in the pregnancy, during the 1st trimester.

M.... I was 36 when I had my last child and had an 11 year old. It was quite an adjustment but has been wonderful. I too was concerned about my age and my doctor which I'm sure your's will as well, ordered an amnio test. It was no big deal and made the pregnancy so much more settling after I got the results and it didn't detect any abnormalities. I too felt healthy and strong at the time and the pregancy was one of the easiest of three! Have the amnio to put your mind at ease and enjoy the new healthy baby I'm sure you will have... blessings!

Hi M.,
NO, you shouldn't! Don't let what you read scare you. We're all unique and there is NO universal standard for women and what our bodies can endure and accomplish. Stay healthy, have faith and believe that all things happen for a purpose. As I'm sure you agree, children are a wonderful blessing. While I'm sure it's a bit scary at this point in your life, embrace it and trust in your God-given and natural ability to have a healthy and successful birthing experience! Many kudos to you for staying fit and healthy...and good for your children as well! I wish you all and best and many blessings in your next 9 months and beyond!!