Potty Training Questions for My 2 Yr Old

I would send her to daycare in underwear and plenty of change of cloths. I spent all weekend with my son in underwear we just didn't wear diapers at all by Monday he went to daycare in underwear and daycare knew I was serious...

I've potty-trained over 40 children.

First, do you want her potty trained - or does she want to be potty trained? There is a difference. If you want her to be potty trained, more than she wants it for herself, it won't be as easy as if you wait for her to want it too.

Second, is she really ready? Age is no indicator of readiness - don't let other people guilt you into "force training" because they think she is old enough to be out of diapers.

She may be able to tell you she is dirty and not wet - but does she go for long periods of time (2 hours or more) without dirtying a diaper? Does she have regular BMs? Is she dry in the mornings when she wakes up? Does she verbally express (without prompting) an interest in sitting on the toilet or potty chair to go poop or pee?

Thirdly, what type of changes are coming up in the near future? Stressful situations in home or career - hopefully, no stress planning your wedding ;), impending changes in home (moving to new place or moving in new people) are not the ideal situations to begin such a process under. Also if nothing is looming immediately, and you need to "force the issue to get the job done" you can expect her to backslide with regards to toileting.

Like I said - I've potty trained over 40 children (and still counting).

I've "forced trained" with parents who wanted it done now. I no longer will "force train" anyone - it is too tramatic for the child, myself, and other children around the situation.

I've trained over a period of time - 6 months or longer. This is usually for the in-between situations. The parent's feel pressure to have their child trained by family or friends, the child has expressed some interest and stays dry for extended periods. Lots of patience needed here. Good days, bad days.

By far the easiest, calmest, and most successful trainees (meaning less accidents and shortest training times) were children who were ready on their own and asked to go without any prompting or bribes required. They were very verbal - as in could carry a conversation and could follow 3-4 steps of direction. Most of the girls about 2.5 - 3 years old, most of the boys 3+ years old.

K., I know it is frustrating for you...I am glad you love your daycare = ) When I worked at La Petite we had no way to take a child from the "Ones room" to go potty...all potty training was done in the "Twos room" and they had to be fully potty trained to advance to the "Three's room"

I know the advice is you should start potty training when your child shows readiness, but unless you have it on good trustworthy authority that the daycare is going to work with potty training with your daughter it is going to be difficult to achieve. The only thing I could see working is if you had a long weekend or took a few vacation days even and got her fully potty trained before taking her back to daycare? Hope it works out for you...hopefully your wait for the Two's room is short = )
B.

I firmly agree that pushing the issue is definately not the right thing for you or your little one; however, if she is truly ready and you are not getting the support you need from your daycare I would suggest using the 3-day potty training method. It may mean that you will need to take a day off from work so that you can dedicate a full 3 days to the effort, ensuring success but I can tell you from experience that it works. I've used it and a couple of my girl friends and they have all had great success. Night training took an extra couple of days to nail down consistency but we are all extremely pleased. The key is that your daughter needs to be showing signs or readiness. If you want her to potty train before she is truly ready it will be a battle. If you are ready and want to get this done, go to 3daypottytraining.com. Good luck!

Cloth diapers. She'll feel it when she's wet.

Face it, no matter how good the daycare is, it is difficult to potty train that many kids at once.
When my granddaughter was doing that well with her potty training, I took a week off, stayed home with her, and we concentrated on potty training all week. It's not like I was the potty-nazi or anything, I just made it my #1 priority all week. It really helped.
Of course she still had accidents now and then. That's going to continue because daycares just can't keep up with that many, but the improvement was dramatic.
I don't know if a week off is an option for you, but perhaps a willing grandparent or friend might have the time ?

wow i want marty in my corner! :) i will say (in my small experience with my 2 1/2 year old boy, being the oldest of 4 kids, talking to other moms with kids the same age, and LOTS of reading on here and other sites) as far as i can tell everything she said was right on. i will also add, that my sitter, who i also adore, does not push the potty training thing. first i think it's too much to expect for her to be taking care of five kids and constantly asking my son if he has to go, or worse, dragging him to the potty every thirty minutes. S., and i am starting to see her wisdom, she waits for THEM to tell her. my son, like most kids, showed some interest before he was two. it was all "new" and "interesting". then he figured out he was actually expected to STOP playing, and do some "work", and he lost interest REAL fast. he got to where he fought me even to put him on it, and i wasn't pushing him, i was positive and upbeat and encouraging. so i completely stopped. like i said he's 2 1/2 now, we have a summer vacation planned, and i am not even bringing it up. he has asked twice to go in the last couple months but nothing has come of it (the first time was while visiting my sister's house and the bathroom was occupied, so the "moment" passed, the other, at the sitter's, and when she rushed him back to the potty, he had a poopie diaper, so that "moment" passed too.) it's really hard to let it go, when i know he's capable of it (i have spent up to 45 minutes on the potty with him, watching one little drip that refused to fall, and actually seeing him holding it in), as well as being so advanced in every other area. he walked at 9 months, and can carry on a pretty adult conversation, for a 2 1/2 year old, uses a computer mouse, identifies about ten colors, numbers up to ten, and all his letters) the bottom line is, i KNOW for a fact he could do it if he wanted to. but i also know, that until he wants to, there is NO forcing him. sooo i'm letting it go. my advice (after all my rambling, sorry!) is be supportive and if she wants to try it, go for it. teach her how it works, how to wash her hands/flush, all that, ...but don't be broken hearted IF she decides it's not as fun as she thought. you can't force someone to go if they don't want to...! :)

I'm going to take a little different approach than the previous responses. Go buy her the cotton training panties and put them on her when she is at home. She will then know what it feels like to be really wet and she probably won't like it. I made the mistake of using Pull ups at first and relying too much on them. It wasn't until I put her in cotton panties that my daughter's potty training really took off. If your daycare is not going to work with her also, then it isn't going to do any good. You need someone that is consistent with what you are doing at home. Otherwise, she will start thinking you expect her to use the potty at home, but at daycare she can continue to go in her pants. Good luck!

Like some said, you may need to take a couple of days off if your childcare center isn't helping. Maybe start with a weekend with planning to take a couple of days off, but not if it's not going well. I definitely believe that you shoudn't potty train until a kid is ready (but I disagree about the waking dry in the morning, I didn't do that until I was 10, my first was potty trained years before she was dry all night, my second only a month or two), but some are ready younger than others. My kids both potty trained fairly young (19 and 22 months), but we used cloth diapers and used the potty from a young age. They enjoyed it and wanted to wear real underwear.

Anyway, I am rambling, but I would say take a good look at your child. If she is seeming ready, I would try it, as I've heard so many moms talk about "missing the window of opportunity" and then they aren't interested again or in a good situation to do it again for a long time. Certainly, though, if she is not ready, wait a bit and try it then. I prefer the "just go to underwear" method, it worked well for my girls and quickly (because they were already ready and used to going potty). A good way to get her ready to potty train might just be to put her on the potty morning and evening before bed so she's used to the potty and just watch and wait for the right time for her and your family.

K.

My advice is this: advocate and be firm with the day care staff. Explain to them in no uncertain terms that you are potty training your child. Of course they aren't in a hurry to get her out of diapers, then they have to take extra time to take her to the potty and possibly deal with accidents.

You pay for her daycare, and you are the mother, you must tell them what you want them to do. Make sure they are doing the same things you are diong at home. If you need to, talk with the director.

I would take a whole weekend when you guys are going to be home and put her in underware...pull ups can be confusing, and let her walk aroundthe house in them...she will feel it more than if she were wearing a pull up. My guess is that she will have a good grasp on it by the end of the weekend and on the day she goes to preschool, i fyou feel confident, then send her in underware and send extra clothes and tell them what you do at home with her.

Good luck, potty training is tough...my 4 year old still poops in his diaper, and my 2 year old is pooping on the potty. It's an indefinite training process. Good Luck!

If you just introduce the idea of going potty, and continue to talk about it for the next year, and keep introducing it, and show by example... I promise she will learn on her own even if the day care wont force her to go. Once a child decides they want to go potty when they feel the urge instead of letting it go in the diaper, then they will tell you or the daycare official that they need to go, and I doubt your daycare person wouldn't let her go if she told them she needed to potty. This will be the least stressful way to potty train for you AND HER. I have 3 little ones, and with my first I force-trained at age 2 1/2, and he ended up with IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) where he would hold in his bowels because he didn't want to go in his diaper or the potty, he would just hold it and get really constipated, and then it would hurt. THen he was scared to go potty, cause he associated it with the pain. It took 3 days of mirilax and lots of comfort with the potty training to get him back to normal. Like your previous post, I agree in NOT force training! I think many parents want to potty train because of peer pressure from other parents, or even just because they are sick of changing diapers and just want to hurry their kids into being trained. Forcing her to potty is not whats best for her, just keep encouraging it, offering it, and introducing the idea. When she's old enough to have a conversation with you about it, you can explain that adults go potty, and she can't go to school wearing a diaper.

That is a dilema. My daycare is so pro-active about potty training, and my almost 2 yr old is in with 3 yr olds too which adds to the inspiration she has to potty in the big-girl potty. I would really talk to the director/owner of the daycare and see if you have any options. It is very difficult to train when you have to work FT. My only other advice would be maybe working very actively on the weekends with her. I set a timer for myself to remind me to ask my daughter every hour if she needs to go potty.

My daughter was closer to 3 before she trained, becuase that is when she seemed ready. It only took one day in the training pants from Target (underwear but with the thick padding) until she caught on. Her daycare was happy to let me bring her in just training pants with plenty of extra clothes. Perhaps you could check with her daycare and see if they are willing to do the same. The sensation is more motivating and educational in training pants then pullups when they have accidents.