Potty Training Boy in Daycare

My son took a long time to potty train because I had another baby in the middle. We tried and showed him the basics like how to use the potty when he was 2.5. He wasn't quite ready then. After a year of being too pregnant and having a new baby he got it between 3.5 and 4. His 3 year old class at preschool had many of the kids in the process of potty training. I think more than half started the year in diapers or pull ups and by June only a few were left. I'd talk to the teachers in the room so you can all be on the same page. Also the daycare was very good about the whole class getting potty breaks in their schedule.

Peer pressure carries far more weight than mom or dad. He is going to see the other kids lining up to go before going to play outside or laying down for nap and he will want to do what everyone else is doing. Is he going to be potty trained overnight? No, will he continue that interest at home? Probably not. I do think it is a good time to implement a reward for going, we use jelly beans, just 1, 2, or 3 at a time when he goes before getting wet. He is at the age most boys really start becoming interested. Boys train much slower than girls in my opinion after 10+ years in child care as both teacher and owner/director.

I don't push kids to do stuff either, when they are ready it goes quickly, if you try and force the issue to some imaginary timetable you end up with battle after battle.

I am not a believer in letting chilcare do most of the work. As a childcare provider I am sure you can imagine why! I am a newer convert to the 3 day potty training method by Lora Jensen. Its finally the ideals I have tried to propose to parents for so many years , all in one guideline. Its not the "bible" by any means, but for me it is what I encourage my families to do and tell them of my success rates in the last year or so with several families (kids ages 22 mos-29 mos).

Its like potty boot camp, and for me, shows the parental commitment to the process that I need to see. Its really NOT my job to potty train your child..but to support and assist in this endeavor...but we do need to be on the same page.

This method requires parents to take a 3 day weeknd or time frame and FULLY commit to the task. Toss all diapers and pull ups (crutches), have everything set to not leave the house at all, to not be more than a few feet from the child the entire time (simple meals cooked or ingredients on hand)..no major tasks like cleaning to do or working from home, yard work, etc...NOTHING but be with and commit to your child in this endeavor.

Many pairs of undies, sheets for their bed, towels about the house to catch piddles...have them wear a tshirt and undies...and to only go potty in the bathroom..not to have potty chairs strewn about the house. The idea is to get them to tell you when they need to go...you won't be taking them at timed intervals..you would be reminding them "let me know when you need to go potty" "make sure you tell me when we need to get to the bathroom"...instead of constantly asking "do you have to go potty"..to which they will always say"no". You will quickly learn to read their cues...a whine, a wiggle, etc...then help them learn to understand it to and to celebrate the success!

Your job is to be his guide...not just assume he will figure it out, nor to assume that daycare will do the job for you. I am sorry...but this attitude irritates me. Sorry...too many years of parents thinking that I will just potty train their child, while at home they continue to use pull ups (the worst invention as far as I am concerned) and diapers, because its easier or they are too busy to take the time and slow down and do this important transistion with their child. So what if they still actually need you to go to the bathroom with them each time to assist with pants, postioning and handwashing. I have no issue with that here at my home childcare. Its better than changing the diapers of these older children. And their sense of pride at wearing those big kid undies and working toward that independence....totally worth it!!!

Good luck! Find an approach that works for you and just do it!! You can do this!!!

My son was potty trained just before 3 yrs old I believe. In his school the teacher told me one day that he was ready and to start bringing in underwear for him and that there was a potty group and she was making this whole big deal about it. So I did. At home we had been very relaxed about training..really just let him take the lead. He would go here and there and I felt as if he was making progress...once he was in the potty group at school" he was fully trained within a week. Now with that said, I belive that we started "training" around 18 months...and when I say training I mean that we just simply talked to him about it, showed him, let him sit and explore when he wanted. NEVER pushed, just kept talking about it and showing. He would always say 'when he was bigger' he would do it..then around 2.5 + he said "mommy I'm bigger now" and he took off with it...just about the same time that his school got on board. It was fabulous! In our school the kids are moved AROUND the age of 3. My son is the oldest of his group of friends in school...so the director (who's daughter is in my sons class and who has become a friend of mine since) kept all the kids who knew each other together until they were all ready..b/c they are only a couple weeks apart. So my son moved a little over 3 - actually this past june into the next room (his bday is march 31st)..all kids were potty trained. What I liked is that the director didn't just move kids based on age...she really focused on the whole picture with transitioning them and she worked with us parents too - b/c my husband and I were getting to the point that we didn't want to wait anymore. Your school needs to be flexible, nurturing and understanding before they start moving kids or pushing them to do anything. As we know children develop differently so they should be able to work with them accordingly. Speak with the teachers...communicate how you feel, what you expect and where you think your child is and what that means for his immediate future. Its not unrealistic to think that once he is around the bigger kids that he will become interested...but I'd want to make sure that he could handle that though - b/c that might make him uncomfortable too...you need to decide. By not freaking out or pushing my son with the training, I belive it was the EASIEST thing to do thus far and b/c he was TRULY ready we have had very little struggles with it...minimal accidents, no regressions. My hardest part is getting him to understand that night time is harder than day time and that he still should wear a pull up at night if he wants to get a good dry nights sleep - LOL! He fights it...but we've tried HIS way and even though he doesn't actually WAKE up from being wet, I had to put a stop to it...the laudry was endless but most importantly I think he was getting rashes from sleeping wet...I can't belive he didn't wake up from it! We aern't ready to awake him to teach him to go potty, I think sleep is more important.

My son was a little older, around 3 y 3mo, when he moved up in his classroom and prior to that had ZERO interest in potty, but we had him in pull ups begining at three and pulled out the little potty at home, etc.
Seeing the other children did peak his interest and he really seemed to "get it" by watching his peers.
it is six months later and we struggle with the poo at home (not at school) so yes, they helped tremendously with the 'heavy lifting' and we supported at home, during vacation and weekends.

I don't think you have to wait for them to show an interest or depend on daycare to take the lead in training. I initiatiated the training at home.
To toilet train, you really need to be consistent, the potty can't be something you use occasionally. If you're looking to train him, you need to make the commitment, and make using the potty or toilet a habit. Take him every hour and a half or so. Don't ask him whether he has to or wants to go, using the toilet should be expected behavior and not something optional. I also would not use bribes or rewards, expected behavior isnt' something they get to choose to do if they feel like a reward, and not do if they don't.
It will also help to get him into cloth diapers or cloth training pants, if you're using disposables. Disposables aren't an incentive to train, they don't leave him feeling wet. In cloth, kids learn what happens when you pee (you get really wet) and start to realize how it feels just before that happens
Good luck

He probably will follow the other kids. They love to do what the others do.
My son trained himself at 21 months because he used to watch my
friends older son. Good luck and don't sweat it.

Actually, some daycares will not admit a child at a certain age if they are not potty trained. When my son was 3 years old, I was told that he had to go to the next room up, 4-5 years olds. They insisted that he be potty trained in order for this transition to take place. Boys are harder than girls, but try this: Place cheerios in the potty or toilet, and make a game of hit the circle with his urine. Yor son will want to potty if you make a game of it. Hope this helps :)