Please Offer Some Advice. I Am Running Out of Ideas.

Dear P.,
Try to use Supernanny method. You can get her DVD (or book) on Amazon.com

Good luck,
V..

I am a school teacher and a mother of two! I completely feel for you! I worked with students with similar issues and I found that creating a chart for earning rewards. Like he has an agenda for daily school activity - homework and classwork - start off with reasonable goals!!! Then chores and other things so that he can gain a certain amount of time to watch tv or computer etc... But what he earns cannot be taken away! This is tough but he did earn it! Also another difficult things is to praise him when ever possible - be specific and constant it is hard but when someone continues to always hear they are screwing up the think they are a screw up and act like one! Hang in there!

Your request touched me. You are all trying so hard with a difficult problem. Consequences aren't working as you describe it. Abandon anything that isn't helpful. Find a new approach to helping your son. He has a lot of energy and ideas and curiosity. All that is good. Find an outlet for him to do what he can do. With the help of your community library, YMCA, church, doctor, school system, find a program that can mentor him. Maybe he could work with horses, I have seen horse therapy farms in Virginia, maybe Davie has such things. Maybe you could hire a trainer at a gym to work with him to use his muscle for good. Exercise is discipline and an outlet for stress. Food banks need strong boys to haul cans and crates and organize foodstuffs and prepare orders and hand out food. He needs to see a way to channel his body and mind and see the happy results of his work from people. He needs positive feedback. Imagine how used he must be to hearing how disappointed or angry everyone is with him. He needs to see happy satisfied folks praising him for something he honestly deserved. Once he is working at something that he likes the consequence is of inappropriate behavior is that they won't want him there. My wise dearly departed Aunt told me when my son was born to always tell him that he was great because "out there" there would be plenty of people who will tell him he isn't worth anything. I used that info even when my husband and my son's teachers told me otherwise. My son is highly functioning and a great family man today. I heard Bloomberg and Schwartzenegger discussing plans in government that meet with failure and they both agreed that failure of one way doesn't mean you give up, you try different ways because you must have a good result and you will go after it forever with attempts until you succeed. Try try again. As a family, because this situation is so stressful, find relaxing ways to spend time together. You must attend to your own stress levels. Lower your expectations. Don't talk about your son. If someone asks you how he is doing say fine. When you are together at the beach or some place safe, give him freedom and don't notice everything he does. At the end of the time say how nice the day was for you all to be together. Take all the pressure you can off of him at home. If you say you all had a great day, it might become a self fulfilling prophesy. Meanwhile your efforts to channel his energy both mind and body will be making small changes in him. He is not the only child like this. Teachers want kids they can control, the world needs men with brave ideas and energy. God love you all.

I went through the same thing with my son... the only thing that got through to him is "structured positive reinforcement"... I know it sounds juvenile but we went to a basic star chart...like they have in kindergarten... he got stars for doing well and earned things at different star levels (IE 30min extra bed time,play time, sleep overs, skate stickers, icecream date w/mom...60 days good behavior...the 80$ shoes he wanted) If he had a bad day..he didn't earn a star and got a strike...three strikes in a 7 day period he was grounded for 3 days...
this is just the highlights but I owe a very good friend ALOT for helping me with it...I got my son back with it!... He isn't perfect but how many 12 yr old boys are :0

I have a juice called MONAVIE that has been getting rave reviews from Moms giving it their kids with ADHD and AUTISM. We can never say it's a 'cure", However, co-incidentally, after drinking this juice, they are happy to share that they have seen "miracles". It's a totally safe juice that you can investigate by going to:
www.monavie.com. Or call me at ###-###-####. I live in Stuart and would be happy to just GIVE you a bottle to try!
The Mom's name is Yvonne Luchese ###-###-#### on Long Island.
I also have the name of a Doctor who is giving it to his son. I can research that for you if you want.I have his name and number in my saved emails.
Keeping this wonderful child away from TV is not working, is it? And, that may be such an unfair punishment for something he is totally innocent about!ADHD is not a choice. Asking for a C when he has not been given an IEP (individual education plan)or help by a trained professional is, in my opinion, asking too much for him and YOU. I would rather have a child with a C who is happy, has friends and full of immagination than an A student who is only concerned about their grades.It's a callenge to be overcome, not something he should be punished for.
I was nominated National Teacher of the Year in 1998 if that gives you more confidence in me.
M.

I have a 19 year old son who also has ADHD and I have a couple of suggestions. There is a really good book with ideas to help him get better control of himself. It is called "Pants with Pockets". You will have to order it but you can do that at one of the larger book stores or on line. Another suggestion is that you have your son see a councelor. Research shows that the best way to controll ADHD is a combination of medication and therapy. If your insurace covers it I would make an appointment ASAP. The therapist can offer your son and you several behavior modification techiques that really help. If you don't have insurance, or your insurance won't cover it, there are mental health clinics that charge a sliding fee depending on what you earn and are very reasonable. I know how frustrating it can be to raise a son with ADHD, but it is also frustrating to have ADHD. You might want to concider not punishing your son for doing things that he has trouble controlling. Instead you could try to work with him to develop stratagies he can use in these situations that will help him to react in a better way the next time. I don't think he wants to be in trouble all of the time, either. He just needs to learn some coping skills. I hope my advice helps.

Bless you and your family, P.. I'm sure that things can be very challenging for you.
As a middle and high school teacher, I've seen parents take privileges away from their children as punishment. The problem is that it ends up backfiring when the child has nothing left to give up. At that point, they've lost it all and have nothing left to lose for poor behavior. Instead try a reward system. Start with small immediate rewards for small tasks done right and work your way up to larger rewards that your son will need to work towards by earning several day's worth of good behavior. (Use a sticker chart posted in a main room in your house.) Set him up with a book that goes back and forth to school and requires the teacher to give him a sticker/star/whatever for good conduct at school. When he sees that you are all "on his side" and working towards the goal of good behavior together (and that he can't misbehave for some and others won't know), things should turn for the better.
Involve his pediatrician, his guidance counselor at school, his teachers, both parents and anyone else he spends significant time with in this process.
I think counselling may help, too. It might give him a chance to talk through some of his frustrations because as another person posted, "He's not doing this to you, he's just doing it." Imagine how frustrated HE feels that he CAN'T always control things.
Finally I have a Mom in one of my Mom's groups that has changed her son's diet according to organics/no additives and she is positive it has helped her son immensely. It may cost more, but the benefits in her son's behavior and the increase level of health for the whole family are certainly worth it for her!!!
Good luck.

P.,
I can totally relate... my son was diagnosed ADHD around 1990. He is now almost 25 years old and doing very well. I did put him on medication for a while (dexedrine once a day) and that helped him focus. I also took an Active Parenting class which was one of the most helpful things I did. One thing with ADHD kids is that they want to be in control. I always gave my son choices... that worked really well. If he was misbehaving I would tell him (as an example) to either stop now or once you are done you will need to go to your room for an hour. And I would always finish my choices with "and it's up to you. it's your choice". Just make sure the choices are something YOU can live with and are realistic. These kids need alot of positive reinforcement. And that's hard to do when it seems they are always in trouble. My son always knew I would be there for him and I think that was important. If you can find an active parenting class, that helped me more than anything. I wish you alot of luck. My son is a wonderful young man now. Very strong willed and takes care of himself. He was not your "typical" child and I am glad I realzied and accepted that early on. Don't try to make your child like all the others. Find his strengths and build on those... sometimes you just have to look DEEP at this age!! Be there for him. Make sure he knows you love him and will accept him for himself. Only fight the battles that are most important. Otherwise you'll find you will be fighting all the time.

Hi P.,
Am running out the door, will write more later, but quick thoughts on your dilemmas with your son:
Most important, he needs to know that you believe he is a "good kid" and that you love him un-conditionally. Do you "catch" him being good every time possible and praise him for it?
Do you let him know every day that although you are stressed out with dealing with his behavior, that you know that he is doing his best to control it, and that you are doing your best to help him control it?

You said that the disciplinary/behavior modification actions you're currently using are not working. So don't use them anymore. All kids need a social life, and ADD/ADHD kids especially need TONS of physical excercise every day. Is he on any sports teams, have you thought about swim team year-round, or track team, tennis? He HAS to have a constant way to burn off all of the extra energy (and frustration/anger.)
All kids must have a social life, this is an absolute necessity. It is seriously unhealthy to be the lonely outcast. And unhealthy for a kid to spend their time withdrawing into their own head and getting into trouble out of boredom.
Taking away the TV is adding to his isolation from his peers: an hour a day keeps him current on what the other kids are talking about. You ofcourse set the rules on what shows he watches. Can't go wrong with Nick: Drake & Josh, iCarly, The Suite Life of Zack & Cody.

As far as the ear piercing, sewer grate, boys are going to do irritating stuff. (You would need to worry if he was sitting in his room having tea parties and wearing a tutu!)
Did you blow up or did you talk with him about the ear piercing? It's always about wanting to be "cool"... can you compromise with him on a date in the future when you will agree to go with him to get his ear pierced at the mall? Maybe when he turns 13? He may not even want to do it by then, but it gives him the satisfaction that you are listening to him and willing to compromise on some of his requests.
Is he trying to self-injure? If so, this is something to really worry about. Talk to the guidance counselor at school to see who you can take him to, and what free or affordable counseling services are available in your area.

Has his school done a full psycho-educational evaluation of your son, and is he on an ESE program at his school? If not, please meet with his principal, teachers, and school guidance counselor RIGHT AWAY. Once he is evaluated, the school will put in place a program to help your son at school.

Have you talked to his doctor/s about adjusting his current meds or switching to a new medication? I did a bunch of research online for my youngest son: there are many medications for ADD/ADHD. There are two particularly that have lowest problems with "rebounding", the worsening of symptoms when the dose wears off. What about the patch? I know several adults that use it and are very happy with it.

My prayers are with you and your family, you are all so brave and enduring so much, and I hope that you all get the break-throughs you need very soon ~

C. N

Find an outdoor activity that he loves to do. Find something of strong interest to him... this hobby/interest may be able to be used as a bargining tool for better behavior in school. It doesnt have to be, but it may help if it was more of a "guy thing". That him and dad can do together.

My step daughter moved in with us when she was 12. I know what you are going through. This is the time when our children are searching for identity, cliques, hormones, are going berzerck, girls/boys, challenge authority to exert,find and demonstrate their individuality...and we have to be sane enough to deal with this and help them get through this alive and as unscathed as possible. AND to top it off they still have alot of energy. If possible, try to keep him busy... since he has so much energy try some sport with discipline...Karate, kick boxing, yoga-(in a perfect world). I presented modeling as a way to keep my girl busy (aside from school). Although, he may seem disinterested, he's just challenging the idea...give it some time. Also try to communicate as much as you can. I know it's frustrating but we have to be on top of these things. You're entering the tough times. Your child is realizing there are options in the world...not only what you present them. He's adventuring. Check his friends. LOVE and SUPPORT and ATTENTION and LOVE and PATIENCE and PATIENCE and PATIENCE and LOVE. This seems to continue for some time. My step daughter is 17 and we still have battles but she's doing fine...WE'll make it through this.
OH...most important...whatever you do be consistent. They need to know where their boundaries are. This helps them feel safe (I suppose subconsciously). ie. they know how far to go before they enter a dangerous zone. They'll challenge the boundary but they atleast know where mom and dad keep the safety net and where dangerous behavior begins. GOOD LUCK, P.. As my mom always says: "This, too, will pass. Strength. -m

Hi P.,

You are certainly not alone! I recommend changing his diet as others have and if that is not successful I suggest finding a DAN! physician. They can help clear up any phyical issues that are affecting his brain such as toxic overload, yeast overload, viral overload. These have proven to be very effective in helping children with ADD to autism. I wish you the best of luck!

C.

P., have you had a behavioral therapist visit with you and your son? Now a days they will even come to your home to work with your child. We have one that visits once a week and she has really helped my son who has mild autism and while she's here she even works with my other two children. I am very grateful for her. She has done wonders and I have learned so much from her. Perhaps this approach may help your son as well. I know when you feel like you've done everything, and nothing seems to work, you wanna just throw in the towel. Don't give up, stand strong! Also, maybe his medication needs to be adjusted or changed.
I wish you the best.
T.

Dear P.,

I also have an 11 year old son with ADHD. It could be that he is have a side effect to a medication that he is on. My son had a horrible reaction to some meds like Vyvanse, it is something to look into. Also, does your son have an IEP at school? If not you should get him one, ADHD is a disability and he is entitled to special services. If the school is calling you so often I would have to question what are they doing to help de escalate the situations at school? If your son has been labeled a trouble maker the teachers have already given up and your son knows that he is not well liked, this causes the child to have a severe increase in behaviors. Most teachers do not know enough about ADHD and they are often resentful of these children for disrupting their classroom and it does not stop there, the teachers lounge is a horrible place where your son is getting a bad rap by the teachers saying "oh you have him" and he gets a reptutation very quickly that will follow him from grade to grade in which he will be targeted the moment he walks into the classroom. I know that unstructured time is where ADHD children have the most problems as well as transitions from active times to quiet times. I would pop in unexpected and spend some time in the classroom and see for yourself what accomodations are being made for your child,do not announce yourself, go in where they cannot prepare for your visit. Taking everything away from the child will make him feel so defeated that he will give up trying, small incentives work best, he needs to feel empowered. It is a very long and hard road, but my best advice is to sit quietly with your child and listen to what he has to say about his school day. Is he being singled out, is he being seated away from the other children, has the teacher simply given up before he or she has cared to create a plan to help your child succeed? No one wants to try harder in a place where they know that they are not well liked or welcome. Our children suffer from a very complex disability, it is not seen with the eye like a child missing a limb, where others will immediately have empathy, our children have a brain disability that most people just view as bad behavior and delibrate defiance,it is a very sad situatation for these children. All they hear is "why can't you just sit still and be quiet? Why are you so hyper?" and so on. This constant dialogue is self esteem crushing and most of all spirit crushing. They simply cannot help what they do without proper medication, and very supportive and postive behavior modifications that focus on the good and not the bad. We have to teach them the skills to be able to control their impulsivity, it takes time, they do not have the ability to weigh the consequences to their actions, they just see it, want it, and go after it,they cannot see further than that,that is the disability. It takes a lot of time, I understand what you are going through, I am still working with my child. I have pulled him out of school because a teacher was caught on video tape abusing my son, holding him in restraints restricting his breathing and crushing his sternum, and guess what? The school, the police and the district DID NOTHING! Even with the proof on the tape. Why? Because they are all interconnected, one persons hand is in the others pocket, it is all political nonsense,I was told the district never loses because everyone wants their funding and once a parent advocates for their special needs child they are put on the enemies list. This is an actual list, no joke and it is where your child endures the retribution at school. You can be as polite and positive as possible but if you start demanding the special services and accomodations that your child is entitled to by law just be prepared. I have read the books, I have researched the laws, I have tried to hire an attorney but I have been told by several attorneys that I need to find one that does not work in Brevard County because if they go up against the system it will effect their career....politics, the ugly side and in the mean time my son suffered physical and psychological injury. I heard from the Governor because I wrote him and the President of the United States and all Governor Crist did was instruct the head of Social Services to contact me and I was told if the police will not do anything than nothing can be done. Fight for your child, be his voice and when things get hard try to empathize with his disability, it will help you find the patience and the will to keep on going.
Good luck to you,
R.

Hi P.,

I know how you feel. My son was diagnosed with ADHD when he was 5 years young. Right now, he's 21,in college and has been in "remission" as per his most recent physocological evaluation two years ago.

I have tried everything: drug (Ritalin for ONLY one year- BAD choice) and therapy, diet, neurological reorganization (excellent), homeschooling (excellent- from 3rd to 9th grade),sports like football and swimming (excellent),and natural supplements from 4life Research(excellent, excellent choice).

Please look into the following supplement that is included among another TF supplements in the PRD (Physician's Desk reference) for Non-Prescription Drugs for the last 5 years:

Transfer Factor Recall

Clik on the following link: http://wandyaponte.my4life.com Look for products and click on recall for general information and the product profile sheet (you can download and print this page).

This is a product that my son takes with fantastic results. If you would like more information, please get in touch with me at my cell.phone at: ###-###-#### or email me at: ____@____.com

A reward system works better that too much punishment, since the punishment is also for us the parents. Remember, I've been there. You son needs to find a good hobby or sport. Most of the kids with ADHD have higher IQ's than the average kid. Keep that in mind.Our sons are very, very SPECIAL. 100% of them turned out to be great human beings with our endless love, help, and support. It works!!!

God bless you all.

W. Aponte

Have you tried playing with the meds and the dose. Sometimes behavioral issues are a side effect of the drugs. Finding a balance between getting the benefits for attention without affecting behavior.

School after-care is horrendous for adhd kids because there is very little supervision there. I would try to look for an alternative. I know its not easy.

Taking everything away from them also hasn't worked for me. Incentives for doing their work and setting short-term goals I found to be more effective. For example, if he does all his homework for the week he gets to play video games on the weekend for XXX amount of time, or if gets a B or better on a test he is rewarded with YYY.

Hanging in there!

Hello,
The best advice to give you is to get 2 books and begin reading immediately.

1. The Body Ecology Diet Recovering out Kids by Donna Gates
(not in book stores but can be purchased online through bodyecology.com)

2. Transforming the Diffiicult Child by Howard Glasser

Good Luck,
C

Hi P.

First I want to say bless you and your family. I have heard of some real success stories from people that have very drastically altered their family's diet. Cutting out all artificial colorings, all products with hydrogenated oils, high fructose corn syrup, white sugar, white carbs,red meat and several other things. Introducing more omega 3 rich foods, whole grains, lots of green leafy veggies and ant-oxidant rich fruits like blue berries, pomegranate etc.... I know that it can be very expensive but eating as much organic fish, grains and fruits and veggies as possible will help him and all of the family tremendously. You can do some net surfing to find more specific options and recipes. And perhaps the most important thing you can do is pray together as a family. Much Much Luck to you all.

Hi P.- My brother, who is now about to turn 20 in under a week, has ADHD and he was always into something when he was younger too. Message me and I will talk with my mom in the meantime for some ideas that might help.

I have a 12 1/2 year old with ADD, Aspergers and Epilepsy, he is high functioning and is in regular 7th grade classes right now. He takes 4 prescribed medications and also i give him Fish Oil Capsules one a day. Before this combination of pills, he used to hide under the table at school, howl like a dog, he tried to stab the classroom aide with a pair of scissors and climb out of the window to escape school, he also tried cuting himself a couple of times. Between the neurologist, the psychiatrist and the therapist we are finally on track. He earns TV time, video game time and all sorts of other stuff by doing homework, being nice to his brothers, not arguing with us, punishments just don't work, they don't affect him but the chance to spend some time playing games or out alone with me or his dad helped. Another thing that really works is visual clues, I did a school day schedule, with pictures so he would know what i expected and when, he responds much better to the visual and when he is arguing we put a hand up to warn him to syop so that we don't have to be constantly shouting at him, it doesn't always work but there are more good times than bad times now, if you want to talk more, message me. Good luck and remember he isn't doing this to drive you nuts, he's just doing it =)

Hi P.,
I’ve read lots of suggestions for you to try. But, no one has addressed the chemical issue.

Do you use products like Mr. Clean, Pinesol, bleach, laundry detergent and fabric softener? Do you spray Lysol, Pledge, Febreze and room fresheners around the house? Most – if not all – of the products under your sink contain harmful chemicals. Not only can they make you itch, cause rashes, headaches and breathing problems, they can affect your brain.

Have you seen a video called The Toxic Brew? You can watch it here: www.theglobalsuccessteam.net/resources/wmv/toxic_Brew_dsl

On a recent CNN documentary, they talked about chemicals that are showing up in our bodies. Babies have as many as 200 chemicals in their bloodstream at birth.

On the 11:00 news a few weeks ago, there was a report on household chemicals. I just saw the promo on the local NBC channel out of West Palm Beach.

There’s a non-toxic cleaner for every brand name product you use today. We’ve used them for over 3 years. Even though we didn’t have the serious problems your son has, it made such a difference in our lives, we can never go back! What if it helped your son?

Non-toxic products are becoming more popular. But, be careful. Some of these products just barely meet the government’s standards, so they still contain harmful chemicals. We only use Get Clean Products by Shaklee. They're available online at: http://GC.StarTeamUSA.net . I trust their research and ongoing testing.

Good luck in your search for a solution. You’ll probably find it will take a combination of things to help your son. If I can help you in any way, send me a personal message.

~M.

Hello P. ,

Have you tried getting help from the school , or from the Dr . that is treating him for ADHD , Probably thosse Meds are not working for him . He needs some kind of " Social Life " , going to the park , participate in activity such a sport he might like Karate is great it gives them self-esteem and motivates them . He is probably acting out because he is frustrated and maybe people around him don't understand him , and acting out would be a way for him to release tentions he made have inside .For school work try a timer it works wonder , tell him for EX lets put the timer for 15 minutes and then you get a 5 minutes break . He neeeds some kind of activity , that might help him . I have two Boys a 7 year old & 2 year old , Boys need to be out ( Playing outdoors) they have so much energy they most release , I wish everything goes well , Keep me posted !!!

~ A.

Paenny,
Good luck in your quest and kudos to you for seeking help and information. I know of a program run by a therapist in Delray for children with ADHD. From what I understand the children involved have had a lot of success and most have even gotten off of their medication since it was no longer needed. My mom used to do some administrative work for the center where the program is held and she was amazed at the impact she saw on the families that attended.
http://www.clearmindedchildren.org/program.html
Check it out. I am pretty sure there has been some coverage int he local news too. I am sure you can google it to find out more.
I would highly recommend you consider the advice given before me on the change in diet. It will have a direct impact on your son. (FYI - I am a woman who grew up with ADHD myself.)

That medication may not be working for him. It can also be more than ADHD. Who is prescribing his medication? If your insurance covers it, see a neurologist. We use a neurologist from the Dan Marino Center in Weston. He had to change my son's medication three times. The first medication was great but it wore off by noon. Our insurance wouldn't cover a second dose so the doctor prescribed something else. The second medication did nothing so now we are on the third and, even though we have a bad day here and there, he is doing much better.

I really love what Suzanne B said!!!!

I agree that if whatever you're doing isn't working, then stop, step back a moment and try to think of something new.
I think he needs something positive in his life- you've taken away all fun- he needs a way to earn it back.

sit back and try to catch him doing something 'good.' even if it's a teeny tiny little thing, take notice & tell him! He'll be shocked to hear something positive and watch, before you know it, little by little he might just surprise you and provide more opportunities to be praised for positive behaviors or good choices...

I also think at his age he should learn about his ADHD. There's a book called putting on the brakes- I googled & found an activity book that goes along with it:
http://www.maginationpress.com/4414576.html

and here's the book itself:
http://www.maginationpress.com/4418323.html

ALSO: since he's on medication, I would get him THERAPY and I would also have you and your husband INVOLVED in the therapy- so you can all be on the same page and so you can all learn together how to be a family w/ a son w/ ADHD...

hang in there!
~L.

Hi P.,
I have a daughter that has ADD. She does not have the Hyper part of it, but she does have a hard time staying focused during school time and with homework. She used to be on Conceta but we had to take her off of it because she lost to much weight. So we are doing the natural thing. My chiropractor is also a nuturtionist so he is helping me with my daughter. She is on several different natural supplements and she is also on Fish Oil. The fish oil is 1200mg with EPA and DHA in the pill. You want the pill with a higher concentration of the DHA in it. I have seen much improvement with her school work after starting her on the Fish Oil. The other supplements that she is on is OPC Synergy,
Neurotrophin PMG,and Cataplex A-C-P. I also give her B12 and Vitamin E. Other then the B12 and Vitamin E the supplements are made by Standard Process Inc. I hope that this can help you. If you have any questions you may email me personally at ____@____.com

L.

You say he is on medication. Is he in counseling? If nothing is different, perhaps something is going on in school. Does he feel threatened? He is getting negative attention. And it is not like you don't care, right? I would try to "catch" him at doing good things and complimenting him on it. Start focusing on the good things. Does he have an activity with one of you-some one-on-one time where he has someone to talk to? It has been my experience that may spend half hour talking about silly things and in the last minute of conversation, your child talks about what is bothering them. You might want to check out a good child psychologist locally. I also like John Rosemond, family psychologist. He has a website with lots of information... www.rosemond.com

not sure if this will help, I have worked with kids with the same needs and also my brother has and continues to battle this. Homework was always a battle and for my brother I ended up doing it with him. He would not listen to parents and fought them, so having an outside source monitor his homework may help,
He would also stop or act like he did not care about what was taken away form him which sometimes backfired because then he would stop doing things they actually wanted him to do such as social life with good friends just so my parents could not control him with it.
He has a hard time with change as well and to this day has a bedtime snack before bed for his routine. I mention this because it has helped when he is included in the discussion of what is expected of him and what he and parents think should happen when not followed listening to his input so he can prepare his mind for what is expected, also deciding on when some should happen such as homework
I know everyone different but thought I would share it.

on another note his optometrists discovered he has some rare thing going on with his eye in which one stops working and you he does not notice, we are doing some research on this, but eye doctor seems to believe that adhd can be misdiagnosed with this, like I said this just happened so don't know much about it, not other eye doctor has mentioned it but this one who is very specialized, so thought I would tell you, he did say it was rare