Please Help Me Get This Boy Potty-trained!

My boy took two weeks or so to get the hang of knowing when he needs to go poop. (he still has the occasional accident) Ultimately the inconvenience of being changed and having to stop everything and go get cleaned up was his motivation. He just needed to be able to tell the difference between pooping and tooting, etc.

I trained my 3 year old boy in an hour or so after trying many methods. Answer: "Toilet Training in Less Than a Day", book by Arzan & Fox. Amazon has it. I followed it to a 'T' and it worked. But, you must do it exactly like the book advises. Basically, they have you use multiple motivational methods at the same time WHILE making staying in a messy diaper worse than going potty. If there is no discomfort (especialy with todays super absorbant diapers & pull ups), then why should a 3 year old boy be motivated to change? When my son made a 'mistake', I asked him why? Being he was articulate and smart, I knew he was building up reasons to not change and manipulating me. His answer was "I didn't want to". The training from the book made him "want to". Good Luck!

My daughter had a problem with my grandson being trained . she put him in a tee-shirt outside and let him play ( he didn't have on a diaper or underwear) . She con't this for about two weeks . It worked , instant potty trained . I know this sounds wierd , and a bit comical , but it worked for my daughter ! Good luck ! G.

I'm in the same boat as you. I can't get my daughter to sit on the toliet long enough to poop. If you get any great suggestions Please pass them along. I'm desparte too. Everyone keeps telling me that I need to patient but patients is not going to get her to sit on the potty long enough.

My cousin did this with her little boy and it worked. Whenever he soiled himself, she'd take him to the bathroom to clean him up. No more lying down on a comfy changing table, and using room-temperature wet wipes. She'd put him in the bathtub, and clean him up with cold water. Needless to say, he found this quite unpleasant. Sure enough, it only took a few cold baths for him to master the art of pooping on the potty.

does he tell you when he needs to go? I got my daughter to go poop on her potty chair last night for the second time (she is 30 mos.) and here's what happened. She came in the office and told me she needed a diaper on because she had to poop. she looked frantic, like she really had to go. I said, lets go sit on the potty and then you can get your Hannah Montana stickers. She sat down and she said "Its working!!"...she started pooping right away. I think the trick is (for me anyways) to wait til they REALLY have to go.
Not sure if this will help for you and your son, but maybe it's worth a try. Just watch for when his normal pooping times are and encourage the potty first and if it doesn't work then tell him he can have his diaper or training pants back on.

Hi C.,

I am very interested in this because I have a 6-yr old boy who still occasionally poops in his pants.
My observations: girls potty train quicker than boys.
Guilt will not work. it CAN make it worse.
What i have done, and it not perfect, he still has accidents, is praise him everyday that i pick him up from afterschool care that he hasn't had an accident.
I encourage him periodically to go to the potty (no snack til you go to the bathroom, no trip to the park, etc) to try more often.
I set a big reward for him with a much desired toy or trip to the zoo, that after seven CONSECTUTIVE days, he gets the reward (withmoine, it was a darth maul figure and speeder, he's just discovered star wars) and keep a picture of that reward handy. mark progress on the calendar and comment every day on the progress. If he messes up, then the count down starts again. that's all, no guilt, recriinations, just, "well, we have to start over on earning the (reward)".
He has a visual with the calendar and the picture of what he wants and the daily high five when he gets thru tht day.

B.

I can't speak about boys; however, my daughter refused to poop in the potty well into her 3rd year. It was clearly a control thing with her - control as to when she got special attention from me or my DH was what I was noticing.

One day I was so exasperated because she hadn't had a wetting accident for months; but, refused to poop in the potty, even when I went went with her, read books, been there done that on all the tricks and rewards. So, I told her she had to change herself and clean her own bottom because she was no longer a baby. Oh, my goodness, she was devastated. She did it - but, with great dissatisfaction. Of course I helped assure she was clean after she did the initial "cleaning" (i.e., put the poop in the toilet, flush, wash the dirty underwear out, and wipe herself clean, flush, followed by lots of washing).

That night just after my DH walked in she pooped in her pants and said "Daddy, I pooped, change me!" I informed him that she was now in charge of changing herself. (he got over the shock) After a fit and a repeat of the previous event...She never pooped in her pants again - never - and has been so proud of it, I might add.
Sounds harsh, and a bit bio-hazard-like; however, when all else fails - we have to get creative and go with our instincts.

Good Luck to you!

Don't feel like the lone ranger. I have a three year old boy also who REFUSES to poop in the potty. He has started going pee but is usually "too busy" to do it. My first born was so easy. I just stopped putting diapers on him. He was trained in three days. But my little one is making me nuts. Someone told me that maybe he just wasn't ready. I don't buy it. I think he's just being lazy. I've been told too that little boys are very possesive with their poop. They feel that it's a part of them and pooping in the potty makes them "lose something that belongs to them." I am so ready to be done with diapers. Just be reassured that you won't send him to college in diapers.
Peace be with you, M.

I remember when I tried to potty train my first child: nothing worked. My mother-in-law took her for 1 day and brought her back potty trained. she said she used M&Ms for rewards. My oldest grandchild was potty trained in his 3rd birthday at celebration station by his grandfather. they went into the bathroom and he saw a urnial for the first time. He wanted to test all of them and it happened. He had a reason to become toilet trained. The moral of the story, the child has to have a reason to want to use the toilet. # is plenty old enough but he may not be ready yet. Grandmas are good sources. God bless you with patience as you struggle with this issue.

D., gramdma of 6, mother of 2.

From what I understand, this is pretty normal for boys. Mine did it, too. Here's what helped for us:

-Take him with you when YOU need to go. Emphasize where the poop is going... "Look, it's going down the potty!"
-Read books about potty training as bedtime stories.
-Let him potty-train his favorite stuffed animal or toy (play-acting is SOOOO effective!)
-Watch VERY closely. Usually there is some kind of sign before he goes, and if you can figure out what it is, you can do the potty-rush to get him to the bathroom on time! My son would stare intensely and not move (not normal, he's a very active child), and when I saw him doing this we'd run for the bathroom!

I wish you luck!

Hey dont stress it will happen! My son was pee trained at 2 and poo trained 7-8 months later. Then night trained a full year later. It will happen just trying to be more creative!

sorry i dont have any creative suggestions. i just kept putting him on the pot alot. And keep talking to him and telling him what i expect of him what he should be doing. No real pressure just thats how its done attitude. after he was potty trained thats when i turned on the pressure when we had minor accidents.

Wow....sounds exactly like my son. Only until he had to deal with the consequences of cleaning himself up did he start pooping in the potty.

We had tons of extra pants. When he would soil himself I went into the bathroom with him. He had to take his poopy pants off and dump any poop that would come off in the potty. I would wipe his bottom and he would put his soiled underwear in the tub. (for me to deal with later)

He only had to do this twice before he started going directly to the potty to poop.

Also, using a potty chair might be better than a toilet ring. Having feet dangling can make it hard on the body to push anything out.

cheers,
C.

The trick is "TIME". It takes time. He just isn't ready and you can not force him to be. You can work with him logically if possible, like Honey, please tell me when you need to poop so we can put a pull up on, because mommy does not like to clean poopy undies. Or something like that. But the bigger the deal you make out of it, the longer it is going to take for him to get it. Then if he does poo in a pull up or undies, make a show out of taking it to the potty, saying good bye poopy, and flushing it away.

I had a friend that ended up taking a picture of her 3yr old son's poo. When he finally poo'ed on the potty, she was like Wow Dad is going to be so proud, let's take a picture to show him. Yes I know it's kind of gross, but he got excited about it, and started pooping on the potty all the time.

I know it sucks to hear it, but time is the only thing that is going to work.

I'm a mother of 3 girls, and my 3.5yr old still wears a pull up at night, and occasionally has poo accidents in her panties. Not on purpose though, she can't always control it.