Piggy Back on Bathing with Kids...

Poor kids don't get to play in the tub?! My sister and I took baths together until we were probably 8 and 9 and would play until the water got cold. As far as bathing with a parent, I don't think it's appropriate for the opposite sex parent after a certain age, but I don't see a problem with moms/daughters or dads/son if everyone is comfortable with it.

Oh my, I bathed with my son when he was little. I was a single parent and it was just so much more expedient some days. I guess I stopped when he was around 3. He doesn't seem scarred by it at all. :P

As for nudity - we now have a joke in my house - "Put some pants on!". I often dash across the house pantless - it is just quicker, especially when my work trousers are hanging in the laundry room. I do not go topless - that would be a bit much - he is a teenager. LOL

He wanders around topless, tho', and occasionally dashes across the house in his undies when his jean are in the laundry room.

Really, it's just no big deal.

I haven't ever bathed/showered with my kids, but I don't necessarily think that I *shouldn't.* It just doesn't work for me. It's not an issue about nudity (I come from an Asian heritage where public bath houses/saunas are normal), it's about "functionality." To me, it's too much of a hassle! The bathing part, not so much, but the drying off, applying lotion, getting dressed, etc. It's work enough to do it twice (baby sister is not old enough to sit up in a tub by herself yet so she gets her bath after big sister), I don't want to add another body to the count. :) Once the little one is a bit older, I will bathe her with her older sister, though.

I also do not let my kids "play" in the bathtub. Sorry, I don't think she's "deprived" of anything because of it. She thinks helping mommy/daddy put soap on the washcloth and rinsing off is great fun. No need to add a bunch of toys and stuff to the mix. Plus, we use the bath as "winding down" time before bed. She gets plenty of playtime elsewhere. This *might* change as the girls bathe together, but I'm okay with keeping bath play time as limited as possible.

wow some of these answers...sickos? gross to shower with your child??? What the heck do you guys do in the shower that it's so offensive?
Yes I let my children play in the bathtub, private time? they are toddlers they have no shame LOL. They want to play together.
I mean this in the nicest way, but I feel there's some serious issues with nudity after reading some of these posts.

Lol at gypsy moms answer, I hope you are kidding that you think it is "gross" to shower with your kids.

Gross? Really?

Yeah I shower with my kids when they are young, not only is it normal AND common but a big time help and makes for low water bills.

All the kids I've known - my own, relatives, babysitting, etc. - have all LOVED to play in the tub. What in the world is wrong with that?

I said this to another question just yesterday - Do we need to take the fun out of everything???

Either I or her big sister (17 years older) bathed with my daughter just about every time. It was fun, close time together, and then we both ended up clean. As she's gotten older, we don't bathe together anymore (we both don't fit in our small tub!) but she'll still get in the shower with me sometimes. She is now 10. It's just no big deal. Really. When she wants privacy, I give it to her. When she wants closeness, I share that with her.

If "a naked body isn't something to be ashamed of" then why is there an age-limit on when they can see us naked? Especially same-sex children. I will be naked in my own home, with my daughter, whenever I feel like it.

Obviously I am a sick weirdo who showers with her children.

Well, we decided if it ever seemed "weird" for our kids to see us naked, then we would stop letting them see us naked. But you know, so far (they are 6 and 9) it really doesn't bother me. (My husband wears boxer briefs at a minimum when the kids can see him.) Honestly, I think it's probably a good thing for girls to see what a normal, everyday mom body looks like. You know, to give them the knowledge that not all female bodies look like the ones in the Victoria's Secret commercials? Occasionally, my younger daughter (who is 6) will shower with me if we need to get ready in a hurry and there isn't time for her to take a bath. My older daughter (who is 9) wouldn't fit in the shower with me, I'm pretty sure, but if she had to for some reason, I don't think it would be weird. I certainly prefer to take a shower by myself, but I'm not bothered by the idea of showering with my daughters, if I had to.

I'm not sure I understand why you won't let your daughters play in the bathtub? That seems like one of the joys of childhood, in my opinion. My younger daughter loves to play in the bath, and it's funny to hear her playing so imaginatively. I think it's a shame to lose out on good, clean fun when it doesn't hurt anything! :(

Well my kids play in the tub for hours and sometimes several times a day, they love it!!!!!!!!!! And about showering together I just answered that question in another post:
" I grew up taking showers with my grandma/mom/sister well into my teen years( It was a heated tank of hot water so it was more for convenience ,not to waist hot water) . It's pretty common in my country (Russia) And I am not talking about growing up poor in the slums or anything ( my grandmother was a judge and my grandfather was a general in the army)."

Its obviously personal preference on whether you choose to bathe/shower with your kids. I have in the past, up to about 3 years old, but don't now. However, I throw as many in the tub together as I can fit! And toys, yah, bubbles, you bet. Don't see any reason not to, but again, if you don't want your kids playing in the bath, your decision. I certainly don't think there is a sinngle thing wrong with bathing with your children as long as you and the child are comfortable doing so, and I certainly don't think there's anything wrong with kids bathing together. The only thing that makes it taboo is adults' labeling it so. Kids are naturally curious and inquisitive and will wonder about their own and others' bodies. My feeling on that is that is better to have open and honest discussions on all that with your kids and not bring any shame or secretiveness to our natural bodies. Sometimes shower/bath time is the best and most natural place for these conversations to get started.

I see nothing wrong with bathing together as long as the parent & child are both comfortable with it. Up to a certain age, of course. A teen boy should not bathe with his mother, but small kids, I see no problem with that. My 3 year old daughter hops in the shower with me all the time. Why does our society want to label everything to be innapropiate? I feel the same way about the 'daughter sitting on father's lap' questions. Natural parental/child closeness is now scrutinized due to the nature of our society today. It's actually very sad.

As for playing in the tub, that's part of the fun of being a kid! Life's too short not to have a little fun.

I see nothing wrong with nudity...but that's just the way I was raised. I am fine with my kids bathing together or taking a shower with me. We do let our kids play in the bath...to us it is some fun play time before bedtime. Once my kids are older I will not let them shower with me anymore...but I am sure they would not want to either! But I come from a family (and friends) who saunas together and even skinny dips. It's just not a big deal to us.

Our family is the opposite of yours... Partly because of euro heritage (no nudity = sex thing) and Asian upbringing, partly because of large families w/ limited bathrooms (4 kids and 2 adults all need to get clean), partly because we're active (camping, surfing, boating, swimming, etc... These and others all have relaxed strictures surrounding nudity/bathing whether it's gym showers or beach showers), partly because we're a mix of military and medical (again, nudity is no biggie).

But even though our family, and most of those I know from the above spheres and a few others take little issue with casual nudity... Most of this country is more puritanical.

Nothing wrong with either, IMHO, it's just what works best for each family. Which can also change with time. I have a girlfriend raised much as your kids are who had 5 kids and 1 bathroom. Nudity and piling as many people in the bath/shower as possible quickly became a way of life. Another has a son with special needs, and everyone helped there. Conversely, another ONLY gets her private time in the bath, so that time became sacred... Even though she didn't give a rip prior to having kids.

Different families, different needs.

Well I semi agree. I don't shower with my son, 5, but that's just my preference. I don't necessarily see anything wrong with it. I think for most people and most, if not all children, it has nothing to do with sex or sexuality. My son sees me naked and doesn't even pay attention. It doesn't happen all the time, but when it does he continues doing whatever it was that he was doing, doesn't stare, touch or anything. Some people said they co-bath until 10 or so and I think that's a bit odd mainly b/c shouldn't they be self sufficient in terms of personal hygiene by then.

As for playing in the tub, I see nothing wrong with that. The best part is staying in until turning to a prune!! My children always have toys and love to play in the tub. What's wrong with bubbles? I'm a grown woman and love to pour Calgon ( when I can find it) into the tub and make bubbles for myself! Playing like you are swimming, squirting water!, what's not to love about that and why prohibit it?

no playing in the tubbie?
wahhh!
i don't care if you don't want to bathe or shower with your kids. why does it bug you so much that others are okay with it?
khairete
S.

I showered with my daughter up until she was about 4. No biggie. And yes, she plays in the tub when she wants to. We don't do bubble baths, though. Not good for females.

Uh....Yeah...I feel ya!
My son, when he was younger...3, 4, 5, showered occasionally with my husband--not me! In the interest of saving time and under certain circumstances, but other than when he was really little and maybe I put him in the tub with me once or twice maybe a half dozen times TOPS (I'm talking about not walking yet--him being passed out to a towel held by my husband for the dry off stage)--not a fan.
Moms get little enough "me time"! Not my shower time too! LOL

What irritates me, is that of you do NOT want your child in the tub with you...somehow you automatically must think there is shame in a naked body. I think at a certain age, it's not appropriate for parents to be taking baths and showers with children. (That is MY belief. Meaning, in MY family. By "parents" I mean, my husband and I.) Period. People and children need to know healthy boundaries and privacy. There is a time and place that nudity is perfectly appropriate. Engaging in some kind of activity nude with my child, is not one of them. They also need to know that there are plenty of ways to be close and bonded with me as a parent. I think it's strange that parents need to be nude with their child, to feel close. I mean, am I less bonded because we don't bathe? Obviously, not. I feel no shame in my body. Just because I believe my son doesn't need to see it, doesn't mean I think nudity is shameful. I don't believe being a parent of a child, makes bathing appropriate. Think about it. If my husband bathed with our nephew (the same age as my son) he could get into trouble with the law. That's why he thinks it's odd.

It really, REALLY weirds me out when family's are nude around one another past puberty. That, I think is flat out wrong and disgusting. I also don't think someone other then a parent should bathe with a child, ever. There is zero need for that, and it's crossing a line...in my opinion. I think it can become confusing for a kid, when other people are allowed to bathe with them.

Playing in the tub, I let my son play if he wants. He doesn't always, but there is no issue with that.

I really think that how you (by "you" I mean "anyone") feel about this is based a lot on how you were brought up. I was raised in a family that was not shy about nudity. We had 5 kids and fit as many of them in the bath at the same time as possible to conserve water. My parents explained and talked about sex often, not in a dirty way, but in a matter-of-fact way. Family members were not shy about nudity, although I do remember my Dad becoming much more modest as I aged. My parents are actually VERRRRRRY conservative and religious. Nudity and sex were just a fact of life. I am sure they were that way because there parents were that way, too.
Anyway, being raised in that kind of household, I am not shy at all regarding nudity. My kids did all shower with me at one point. My 4 year old daughter regularly showers with me. It saves time and water. She honestly pays very little attention to my body, just as I pay very little attention to hers. We have fun writing ABCs and words on the steamed up shower door.
When my kids got to an age where they would be embarassed or felt shy and modest, that is when co-showers (and co-baths between the kids- I have 1 boy and 2 girls) stopped. I think that may have been around 5.
I agree with you in that showering can be a good private time, and it is often the only break from the kids that I get. We have a different attitude about baths here, though, we feel like baths are for playing and getting clean at the same time. Each family is different, though!

I have showered with my dd before, shes almost 3. It was a situation like we all his got back from the beach and were covered in sand or when she was really sick I set up her baby tub in the shower while I took a hot shower to try and clear her sinuses. Normally I dont bathe with her and would not find it acceptable for someone else to, like a grandparent. I do throw my kids in the tub together though, just to save time and water.

Bath time should be fun! I do think that's a bit odd you don't allow it, especially for kids under 5! I plan on bathing with my kids. I see nothing wrong with it.

WELL, you asked. Not sure what you expected accomplish, other than to feel righteous and sound like a judgmental idiot. Who cares what other people are doing. I know I sure didn't care what you were.

I doubt you are the ONLY one who doesn't.....

But I do from time to time. My kids love when I get in the bath with them. We play games, practice writing with shaving cream and just have fun.

But I also have tons of water toys for them to play with, put shaving cream in the tub, colored cubes in the water to change the colors. I let them stay in the bath until they ASK to get out most of the time.

Different parenting styles - doesn't mean yours or mine is wrong or right. If it works for you, then that's great!!

My husband and I decided that our kids can see us naked up to about age 3 because by then they can have a memory of their naked parents :P But, if it happens somehow after that we're not going to freak out. A naked body isn't something to be ashamed of so I don't want to teach my kids that. But I don't want to scar them for life-haha.

Also, to be honest, I've never heard of someone not allowing their kids to play in the tub. It's a great time for them to have a special time in the water, plus a great place to learn things. It's a little break from them being anywhere in the house, they're contained. What a fun, relaxing way to end the day by getting clean, playing a bit and chatting with mom and dad :)

I never bathed with my kids and probably never will. But my mother and I bathed together for as long as I can remember, almost, until I was about, maybe, 14 or so, I think.

I never remember anything gross about it. I didn't know any better, so as far as I was concerned it was normal to me.

But, I don't know, for no reason at all it does not seem like something I want to do with my child. No reason, I guess, except that I like taking showers alone. Very few times in the day I actually get to be alone, LOL! It's already enough that the kid walks in on me while I am on the commode, creeps into bed in the middle of the night, follows me into the closet when I get dressed. I suppose I just wanna shower alone!

I agree with you for the same reasons. My kids are 12 and 9 and they never bathed with us and we didnt let them just sit and play in the tub. You get clean and you get out. The bathroom is not a place to hang out and have a good time. LOL!

I have never bathed or showered with either of my kids, it actually never occured to me to even do this. I walk around topless in front of them sometimes and occasionally naked (so its not that there is any shame in a naked body) its more that they are usually so dirty after playing outside and just from being kids i dont really wanna bathe with them. I think at a certain age it is not appropriate by age 6 or 7 i would say they are more than capable of bathing themselves.

i don't think i ever bathed with my son, just not something i saw as necessary. he's 5 now and no way. i stopped changing in front of him (involving nudity) when he was probably 3 or 4. now i will be "not fully dressed", but nothing that a swimsuit doesn't reveal. and i don't wear teeny bikinis :)

but i do let him play in the bath. it's one time i know he's not making a mess (except a little water on the floor, and that's rare nowadays), or getting into trouble! and he loves it. so for me it's like a little break. granted our bathroom is in the exact center of the house, and i can see him or be within a step or two of seeing him almost everywhere i go.