M.B.
I would try Allegra. I had a prescription for a 12 hr one and it really seemed to help. Also, I would try to make an effort to go. I have 3 cats and allergic family members who have been to my house maybe 3 or 4 times in the 4 1/2 years I have lived there and it seems pretty one-sided. I also have bad allergies but I just find ways to deal with them. You not going to their kids party might be kind of off-putting to them. Like their house is too dirty/gross for you. Kids only get one birthday a year and the years go by way too fast! Good Luck!