I'm wondering what others have done/are doing out there...My 2-year-old is currently in daycare 3 days/week. Our daughter is due at the end of November. When you were on maternity leave with the new baby, did you have your second child at home as well?? Or, did you send your older child to daycare as usual? I am considering a combination, but want to hear what has worked well out there.
I worked at a daycare and most parents either stayed home with both children to save on money. or Kept the older child in daycare so they wouldn't mess up their schedule and keep their spot in daycare as well as giving mommy more time with baby. If it's only maternity leave you might not want to confuse and mess up the two year olds schedule to much because going back to work might throw the two year old off.
I plan to yank my daughter from daycare. I will have her in daycare maybe 1 half day during that first week and 2 half days the second week. This is just so she gets most time at home to bond with the baby yet she will adjust going back to daycare after the two weeks. I'm having a c-section so I need to life her as little as possible and my husband will be home for only two weeks. When my weight restriction is lifted around 6 weeks postpartum I will have her home maybe 2 days a week until I return to work.
I think it depends on the temperment of your 2 year old. I kept my just turned 3 year old son in daycare fulltime when I had my baby girl. He simply had too much energy for me to keep him chained to the house where I needed to be (I'm not a good public breastfeeder!) Another thing to consider is the time of year that you're having this baby (winter). If it was summer, you'd be able to do more playing in the yard, park, etc., but in winter you'll be really homebound.
Also, I don't think the comments about your 2 year old being "sad" are valid. First, your 2 year old won't necessarily know you're at home. Second, your 2 year old can feel very "big kid" in that he/she gets to go to daycare .
My daughter was 2 when our 2nd was born. We kept her in daycare 2-3 days a week. It was a very good experience. In part, becuase I could sleep when the baby slept and focus on being a new mom and in part becuase my daughter didn't feel neglected or jealous of the new baby. She had fun and interaction with kids and then I could pay better attention to her when she was at home. I have heard many moms say that if the child is home full time with baby they get jealous of the attention spent and inability to focus on them. So, part time daycare benefits all!
when my 2nd was born I kept my oldest in daycare 3 days/week. It was great to have the 1 on 1 time with my daughter, plus it reserved his place for when I went back to work.
my boys are 22 mos. apart...
for the first two weeks I brought my two year old to day care. Then I pulled him out and kept him home with me the rest of my leave. He was excited to stay home with mommy too...I think he felt left out being sent to day care...he really adores his little brother.
I never really had problems, during that time he learned how to be gentle with his new baby brother ... I gave him more responsibilities during that time, gave his small chores or tasks. We did a lot of baking. I 'taught' him how to do dishes...now everytime I do dishes he goes and gets his stool to help me. (if he still helps when he is 15, that would be really nice).
However when I was feeding the newborn, the first couple of weeks the toddler would get into thing (just when I thought I had everything childproofed...) I keep my make-up in a closet and he got into that and put lipstick on...all over his face...but that is all he really did.
I think it really depends on the mommy, I got bored at home on maternity leave...those new babies sleep all the time.
It would just take a week or two for you to get into some sort of pattern to know just when to feed the toddler, before/after the infant gets hungry...it gets difficult if the toddler is eating and then the infant is ready NOW...
It is really up to you and how your feeling after you give birth.
I had my older child(ren) (I have 3 kids now) also continue with their normal preschool program.
I felt he/they needed the activity and social fun of playing with their toddler freinds, I needed the break with the baby (not to mention used that time for errands and house cleaning) and I felt if I took him/them out that it would just make it hard for them to return. I did have him/them do shorter days at daycare and instead of driving to get them I had now the time to walk with the baby to pick him/them up.
Don't you think your 2 year old would feel really sad knowing that you were home, yet you sent her to be somewhere else? I think that would give the message that she isn't important to you. And you know that isn't true.
Having a baby is rough though, and maybe you could send her just the 1st week, (2 weeks if C-Section). So you have time to rest and recover.
