Oddest Thing Your Ex Ever Did That Makes You Still Laugh

When my daughter had a massive heart attack at 16, and she was being life flighted to a major trauma center, I called her dad (my ex-husband) to tell him, and he goes "Oh, um, do you think I need to come out there?" I literally pulled the phone away from my ear and looked at the phone incredulously - and said "Oh, I don't know - why don't you discuss it with your wife and do what you want to."

BTW- he DID come to the hospital, and was there during the whole ordeal. But still.....

For M., it wasn't so much what he did as what he said. He had gotten his bottom two wisdom teeth out, and six weeks later he was still complaining about how much they hurt. Finally, I got exasperated. I told him that I had gotten all four of mine out at the same time, and I didn't complain nearly as much or as long as he did. His response? "It's worse when it's J. the bottom ones."

My friend told M. that that could only be explained as "guy logic."

Most of the really dumb stories in my relationships - are about M. in my drinking days. :)

I had one end our engagement because I bought a new truck and it "changed M.". I still think that's ones funny.

I know once I decided to buy chocolate pudding (ex's favorite) and leave it in his car, thinking it would be a sweet, "I'm thinking of you" moment. Instead ex hopped in has car without looking...and had a chocolate explosion. He came in to work the next day with a stained hat and then told M. how it happened. Even though I felt bad.....it was funny as hell. It even got on the roof of his car.

That's pretty funny. He put a lot of time and effort into that! He sounds like an extremely organized fella!

My husband is such a blonde. He grew up without a father figure and was raised by women. I grew up with 4 brothers. SO, I'm the logical problem fixer and he is the blonde. HIs 2 biggest duh moments that made M. laugh
1) he was speeding and I asked him to slow down. He pointed to the cars in front of us and said - "they're going faster than M.." He thinks that if a car is in front of us, they'e going faster than we are!
2) I told him I didn't think the A/C at the house was working properly. It wasn't cooling the house effectively. He looked at the thermostat, it was set to 70. He put his hand in front of the vent and said "That feels like 70 degree air to M." lol He thought the A/C puts out whatever temperature air you ask it to, not that it kicks on and off at the temp to try and maintain that temp in the room.
I don't correct him. I J. giggle to myself.

Tried to impress M. with his roll of quarters-or was more like a roll of dimes?????

When my now ex and I first got together, we were sorting our dirty clothes into piles to wash: whites, darks and medium. My ex holds up a SOLID orange shirt and says "does this go in the whites"? REALLY??? No, you freaking idiot, it isn't WHITE!!! I should have took that as a sign and not married him...would have saved M. 12 years out of my life. =)