My 6 year old kindergartener is having some struggles dealing with her everyday school interactions. She has always seemed to be a very outgoing, social personality, but her kindergarten teacher has indicated that she becomes extremely anxious during class. She has had some trouble expressing herself in the classroom this year and it is becoming more of a social problem. Her interaction with her classmates is very limited because of this, and the teacher says she remains mostly emotionless during the day. It is to the point where her teacher says she can feel my daughter's anxiety level raising the moment she enters the classroom. And she will frequently raise her hand to add something to a conversation in the classroom, then when called upon will be so nervous that she forgets whatever she was going to add. She puts herself almost into a panic attack when called upon during group discussions. And when trying to interact with her peers socially, she lacks the skills to go up and ask if she can join in a game or if someone would like to play with her. We have noticed her speech is slightly delayed by her using the incorrect words or putting them in the wrong order.
She does put herself into panic attacks occasionally and it is almost impossible to talk her out of them or calm her down logically. She will go off on a subject, like thinking someone is going to leave her alone, and we try to tell her, we have never left her behind before, so we will not leave her behind now. Once calmed down, she realizes what we are saying, but in the moment she becomes very obsessive.
When she started preschool at three her teacher that year indicated she has some sensory integration problems, but I think that is only part of the problem we are seeing now. We have addressed the sensory issues, and are still working on them, but her social and emotional issues are becoming overly alarming and disturbing to the teacher and now to me.
What I am wondering from you wonderful moms out there, is if anyone knows of any outstanding mental/behavioral health practitioners for children? I am really thinking we need to have her evaluated more in depth, but am not sure where to even begin.
We have been to Child Find with her, and will be returning for more evaluations there, but I know in the past they were unable to offer any assistance since she only qualified for sensory issues alone and there needs to be more of an issue than just the sensory issues. She is right on track academically, but we want to try to find out what is going on before she gets much older and it begins to interfere with her social development and interactions more so she doesn't begin to feel alienated or ostracized from her peers. Thanks for any advise, referrals, and information!
I suggst calling local pediatric offices and Children's Hospital for mental health referrals. Good luck to you!
Hey K.,
I would have her evaluated. My son had something similar going on and it turned out to be auditory processing disorder. It's totally not a big deal for him. It simply means that in the time it takes teachers to ask a question and for most kids to raise their hands and produce an answer, he's still processing the question. THEN he has to think about it and process his answer, then figure out how to word it. The anxiety could be coming from not being able to respond as quickly as the other kids and feeling like she's being left behind metaphorically. My son has a couple of other minor learning differences like disgraphia (his writing and spelling are really below grade level) and would get super upset when he couldn't do things at the same speed as the others, and frustration would come out in other ways. He would act out, and hide his work from teachers and other students.
I saw a fabulous documentary about learning differences like this called FAT city. It's filmed in a classroom setting, with special education teachers and parents as the "students". The "teacher" shows them exactly what it's like to have a learning difference by manipulating the situations, confusing them, and "putting them on the hot seat". It's amazing and really eye opening. It also gives you clues and tools to help your child and their teacher. I think you can get it at the library or possibly Netflix.
Good luck, don't worry, and know that your daughter is likely brilliant, but can't figure out how to show it.
:)
K.,
I had a brother with behavioral problems and depression so I somewhat understand some of what you are going through. I have also worked in the medical community for about a dozen years. The BEST children's psychologist is Newt Bryson in Provo. He works specifically with children, and he knows how to connect with a child on their level. He made the difference in my brother's life that helped him through his problems and he now leads a successful and happy life. Since then I have worked for several physicians in Salt Lake and Utah counties, some of whom have taken their own children to see Newt. They all say that there is no one better out there. Here is his contact info:
Newton Bryson
Phone: ###-###-####
Fax: ###-###-####
1034 N 500 W
Provo, UT 84604
Good luck with your daughter! It sounds like you're on the right track in being proactive about the situation.
K.,
Please do not be alarmed by any of the suggestions here. I agree with all of the suggestions to get your child evaluated by the school district. You can request the evaluation and they must do it. As a former Special Education supervisor, please let me tell you that the symptoms could fit any number of disorders. If you do not feel that the school district is being thorough enough, be a strong advocate for your child. I'd like to recommend a new website on autism; it's very parent to parent: http://www.rnrtransitionservices.com/
and an article on the topic:
http://www.suite101.com/profile.cfm/chadwellre
Here in SW Denver area, we have THE expert on Sensory Processing Disorder, Dr. Lucy Miller. Check out their website www.spdfoundation.net. It's full of information and resources for you. Best wishes, we also are trying to tackle issues in kindergarten before life becomes much more difficult for these little guys.
Not sure where you're located, but we went to Pikes Peak Mental Health in Colorado Springs. The woman we saw is no longer practicing there, but I got a good vibe from the place in general. Maybe the school psychologist (or district if your school doesn't have one) or her doc can refer you at least to a place & you go try out practicioners til you find one you'd feel comfortable taking her to.
My niece was just diagnosed with Sensory Processing Disorder...and, she has very, very similar symptoms that you describe in your daughter. Unfortunately, we didn't catch it as early as you are (she is 11 now). But, they can do soooo much to help her out. Children's Hospital is a great place to start. But, if you are in the SW part of Denver Metro...there are other facilities that can evaluate her, too. The sooner you get her evaluated...the sooner you can do things to help her out and not feel so helpless. My prayers are with your family!!!
Check out www.interactivemetronome.com My mom is a provider and it is a wonderful program! I can't even begin to explain the changes I've seen in her clients let alone me and my family! Also, Lucy Jane Miller may be able to help you. I can't remember the name of her program, but she is highly respected. I think the program has the word "star" in the name. She's here in Denver. GL!
I am in UT but I work on the special needs bus so I can give you a little help. Small group kindergarten teachers or even special needs preschool teachers are very outstanding people! If you are able to contact someone from this group, they would be sure to help you out. It is a very slim chance that she is autistic but there is always that chance. We take one boy that is in jr high into school with Autism and he is a very smart kid. He reads huge novels and can remember anything. We have heard that his social behavior is out of control but he never gets like that on the bus. Thank goodness!! I'm so glad to hear that you are taking a proactive stance on this.
a friend has had a wonderful experience at the Havern school on Quincy and Wadsworth.
It sounds like you've gotten some good advice about evaluation of the underlying problem, but I wondered, in addition to that if you had considered homeschooling her for a while? Could the pressure of formal education be exacerbating the problems? Dr. Raymond Moore's book "Better Late than Early" discusses research that shows how some children are not ready for formal schooling until age 8-12. It's available through the Jeffco library system.
You can find information about homeschooling on a site I maintain, here: http://www.schoolchoiceforkids.org/english.php?ID=18
Best of luck to you!
My daughter is diagnosed with PDD. Pervasive development delay. Her speech at 5 has made her an outcast even in preschool. I hope you can find a good speech therapist like the one who is working with my daughter. Also get her hearing checked out. It is sad how children treat each other even at this tender age. When kids feel they are rejected by others, it gets even harder to be around a group of them.
I read the other responses you have received, and it sounds like there are lots of great resources (and great moms to recommend them) out there. One possibility that nobody has mentioned, though - is your child being bullied? Some of the behavior you describe could occur as a result of bullying.
Hi K.,
The Children's Hospital has a behavioral health team that can do an evaluation on your daughter.
Memorial Health System
1400 East Boulder Street
Colorado Springs, CO 80909
###-###-####
(800) 826-4889
____@____.com
S., mom to 3
K.: i read the other responses but no one mentioned anything about allergies. My son had a lot of the same issues and his teacher referred him to a naturopath. We took him there and found he has a dairy allergy. It's amazing how his whole attitude changed after we took him off dairy products.
I know it's hard to know what to do and who to see but I can tell you're a mom that's going to do what it takes to help her children. Good luck!
It sounds like she might have Asperger's. Try looking up a local sensory clinic that can point you in the right direction, and make sure to keep the school in the loop. Talk to them for suggestions and direction as well for outside help...they probably have referral options for you! Best of luck!
Hi, K.,
I'm a professional family advocate for families with children with special needs in the Denver metro area. I want to refer you to several local resources. Peak Parent Center www.peakparent.org is our statewide parent information and resource center. You'll find info on lots of referrals there. It sounds like you need a full psychological evaluation of your daughter. If she is in school, that would be your first stop to get the academic and intellectual piece of the eval done - it is free to you if she is having learning issues. if you are looking for a broader evaluation I recommend either JFK Partners or the NeuroDevelopmental Center, both in Denver. Depending on what school district you are in, you will have more or less luck getting support from the school district. Given that there are only 5 weeks left to the school year, they may make you wait until August for a full eval - I would still make the request in writing now which triggers a timeline that goes into effect immediately. You can contact me privately if you want to talk more about this. If your daughter is receiving OT for sensory processing disorder and is now experiencing anxiety and social skills issues that are interfering with her ability to learn, you are definitely taking the right course here.
take care, S.
It does sound as if your little one has some social issues, the fact that she also have sensory problems points me to a form of Autism called Aspergers. Even if it is not this it may well be a form of Autism. Its not a bad thing, most autistics have above normal IQ's and succeed but need a bit more help to control the social anxiety. The chances of a girl having it are slim, its 1 in 62 for boys. Girls are closer to the 1 in 300 ish range. Girls also tend to learn to control problem social behaviors(face it we are smarter:)) I am much better then I was at 9 years old, but I still have quirks. lol.
I would skip the everyday doctor and do a search for local(up to 200 miles away sometimes) Autism Psycologist, most the time they are listed under the behavior section or mental disability.
Also for her sensory issues, contact an occupational therapist(called OT) They will show you tricks to help her calm down, my oldest loves the baby hair brush rubbed on his back.
It does not say what area you are in but you can join Cafemom.com and there is an autism group(over 9k members) and ask for people in you area who they think is best in your area. I am in Idaho Falls and can give a list of dr's here.
I found this for Denver
Hi Kim,
I feel your pain. I am going through an EXTREMLY similar situation with my 6 year old son. We are working with the Children's Hosptial doing evaluations and testing and things of that nature. They are a wonderful staff of doctors who really care. The only draw back is it takes a while to get an initial appointment. The phone number to get started is ###-###-####. I hope that helps. God Bless. K.
Wow, My husband and I just went to hear a woman with Autism talk the other night and bought her book, " Th way I see it". Our son is 8 and sounds alot like your daughter. He was diagnosed as Aspergers this year and this speaker spoke on both. Her book is awesome resource for parents searching for answers. Her name is Temple Grandin and she is one of the formost authorities on Autism and Aspergers. She is 61 and fabulous speaker we learned so much. I also would go along with the others Children's hospital is a great place to start. Check with your doctor for a referral. I know the frustrations that you feel not knowing how to best help your child. I am fighting many issues right now and wish you all the best. Feel free to call or write if you need support. M., ____@____.com
