Ok, long story, but my daughter is three almost four, she will be four in less than a month, and we noticed the last week or so she has been really tired, and not sleeping well, she has some developmental delays, and a seizure disorder. Yesterday we found out she had an ear infection, so we figured that was why she wasn't sleeping. But, last night I went in to check on her before I went to bed myself, and she was laying in bed, still awake. Mind you she had already been in her room in bed for about three hours. So, I went in and gave her a kiss and re straightened her blanket and told her she needed to go to sleep. She started crying hysterically and told me she couldn't go to sleep. I asked her why and she said, "The monster will get me." I asked her what monster and she said, "The monster that comes when I sleep." Now, the only thing she watches on TV is Dora the Explorer, Disney's Cars, and Sesame Street. She goes to half day pre school, but I don't think anything has happened there, and I know nothing has happened at home. My question is, how do I reassure her there is no monster so she can get some sleep? I had her look under the bed with me, and and in the closet with me, and showed her there was no monster, but what else can I do?
Thank you all for the great advice. She has started sleeping better and we did figure out what the issue was. We had a small tremor earthquake a few nights before this all started, and it scared her. We talked about earthquakes, and explained them to where she could understand them, and she is sleeping much better now.
When my daughter went through this stage we used a magic chapstick that kept the monsters away. They don't like being kissed by lips wearing the magic chapstick. She just put it on every night when she got in bed and the monsters stayed away.
aw poor thing...what worked for my son (his "thing" was spiders) was "SPIDER SPRAY". your daughter sounds like her fears are a lot deeper than my son's were, but it might work. maybe leave the spray (a plain spray bottle of water) next to her bed so she can spray the monsters in the night if they come back.
(also talk to her as much as you can about her fears. ask about what kind of monster, why is it scary, ect..)
I remember when my oldest went through this. It was all of the sudden & I don't know where the monster idea came from. what we did with our oldest was we made 'go away monster spray' that kept the mosters away. I bought a small spray bottle, filled it with water & added just enough vanilla extract to have a light scent. we had our son spray around his room everywhere a moster might be. It kept the monsters away & helped him sleep. You could use any scented oil, but I just wanted it to be something that wouldn't hurt them if they sprayed themselves or got it on themselves.
we also gave our boys flashlights that slept with if they were scared.
God bless!
Monster spray! Its really great. Get a squirt bottle with some air freshner and mix with water to soften the strong scent. Spray it around her room and say now no monsters can get in.
Also talk abotu those dreams and talk to her about how things arent real, if she gets scared best thing to teach her is to scare the monster away. teach her how to roar. works for my youngins.
We had something similiar with my grandson who suddenly became afraid of monsters and we found out that at the daycare they had started reading the book "A Monster in the Closet" and that was the cause of his fear.
Ask at the preschool about the books they have been reading to the kids.
Good luck.
You can try all of the previous ideas, but also let her talk about the dream(s?) she has already had that scared her so. If she wants. Not all kids like to talk about their scary dreams.
Regardless of how much you explain to her that it isn't real, even if she can understand that it isn't real, it is still very scary for her. My son, when he was about 9 years old, who had no significant history of scary dreams, had one one night that caused him to come into our bedroom and bring his pillow and ask to sleep on my floor next to the bed. (This is NOT something that had ever happened before). His dream that night was just very very vivid and frightening. He wouldn't talk about it until about 2 days later. All he would say was that it had scary alligators in it. He never would say more than that. One other time he had a really scary dream that his sister had no body, just a head, and she was (well, her head anyway) was sitting on the footstool talking to him. It sounds funny now, and he laughs about it now (he is 12 now) but at the time, it wasn't funny at all. Obviously, he knew that it wasn't real. But at the time of the dream, it really didn't matter. It upset him.
I say all that, to say... do the sprays, do the coins. But ultimately, what your daughter needs is some hugs and comfort from You. Sit with her for a few minutes and talk with her. Listen to her. Let her get her stresses of the day out before she goes to sleep. Consider playing soothing music for her as she drifts off. Let her know that you will come in periodically after she is asleep to "check on her". I have always done that with my kids. Even now, I don't tell them I am doing it, but I do check on them before I turn in for the night. :)
I had some super frightening dreams around age 5/6 that I have no idea what, if anything, I could possibly have gotten the subconscious ideas from. Dark "creatures" were chasing me around a lake. It was a recurrent nightmare. It eventually went away. But it was very very real when I was dreaming it, and would wake up practically hyperventilating and afraid to move. I still remember parts of it to this day (I am 42). Try not to focus on telling her it isn't real, as listening to her and telling her that she is okay now. That you are there. That you will protect her from harm.
We used "dream coins".. To me and you they look like quarters, but they are talisman that when placed under your childs pillow will keep the bad dreams away.. They also work on out of town trips and when sleeping over at other peoples homes..
One time I was change the sheets on our daughters bed and I found a pile of coins under her pillow.. I asked her about it and she said she had a REALLY scary dream so she put a lot of coins under her pillow to make sure it went away!
I love the "monster spray" in the bottle.. I suggested this to a neighbor and had her add a dash of vanilla (that is a comforting scent) she said it works great.. They spray it in the closet, under the bed and behind his door..
I think you have gotten some great ideas but I would also make sure there isn't anything going on at daycare. When my oldest was that age she was having horrible nightmares, come to find out the ladies working in her classroom at the daycare would put on a monkey mask and scare the kids if they weren't behaving! I complained to the director and pulled her out of the daycare and the nightmares stopped, but she remained very afraid of monkeys for several years.
Our daughter had some really bad nightmares and night terrors at about the same age. When she was three we woke up to a blood curdling scream coming from her room. Scared us to death, but she was just having a truly terrifying dream. We use rope lights under my daughters bed as a night light. It defuses the light and make the dark spaces under the bed less scary. At other times we have let her sleep with a flashlight. We also have go to protective stuffed animals such as dragons and puppies to scare away bad dreams. Calming music seems to help keep the bad dreams at bay as well. The spray and extra hugs don't hurt either.
J.
Don't worry this seems to be something all kids go through at this age.
