New mom...need Some Help

I would suggest seeing a lactatino consultant.
Some newborns will not take huge naps. He knows when he is tired and how long he needs to sleep, that's not something babies need mom to decide for them
Good luck, and I would definitely start with the lactation consultant.

Hi J.,

Congratulations on your wonderful new person! And thank you for breastfeeding him, on demand. It will be an incredible relationship for both of you, and the longer you do it the more physically healthy and emotionally strong and well your baby will be. Don't let ANYONE convince you that you should wean at 1 year old--it's the current fad, but it is not in any way required, "normal", or necessary, though by that age he will also be having solid foods.

For now, just know that the breastfeeding relationship is a continuously changing one. He is going to have HUGE growth spurts--often. At this age, just about the time you both get comfortable with a routine, he literally will grow another layer of brain cells, another inch of length, another pound of muscle, bone, and fat...it's endless! And it can be sort of confusing for both you and the baby.

You should absolutely keep feeding on demand. He is far too young to try to put on a schedule, though if you pay attention, you will find he will work himself into regular patterns that could be called a "schedule" but are more of a "dance"--with rhythms that shift periodically (sometimes every few days!) based on his growth patterns and development. It is more like he will put you on a schedule than the other way around, though of course, your own needs have to fit in there as well.

As far as sleeping, some babies will sleep at very regular times, some will sleep for an hour or two at a time, some will sleep all night from the beginning (if you can call 4-5 hours straight "all night"), and SOME, the little dickens', will never really fall into a regular sleeping schedule or take long naps during the day. I've had three daughters, and each one of them was vastly different on their sleep patterns. Don't worry, as long as he's growing, alert when he is awake, and doesn't seem to have any pain or anything that is keeping him from sleeping. He'll do exactly as his body is programmed to do.

Hi J.! I breast fed both of my kids, and always on demand. Babies know when they need to eat, so in my opinion, your doing a great thing! And it's true, they do tend to make their own schedule, even if it changes often. As for the fussiness, my daughter was like that from pretty much day one, and would get worse when I nursed her sometimes. By 5 weeks old she was diagnosed with acid reflux. She spit up often, and would scream after nursing. Big red flags when I nursed my son for 13 months and he had never spit up. You are going to be more tuned in to you baby than anyone, so if you think there is a problem, find a pediatrician and talk to them, it can't hurt! As for the pacifier, I tried to get my daughter to take one, and she wouldn't, but if you haven't given him one yet, and don't want to, I wouldn't.
Oh, and for sleeping, it's hard to say, some babies are sleepers, and some aren't.
Good luck, and congratulations on your little guy!

He may be hungry but uncomfortable, and his discomfort could be any number of things. This is the checklist I used to go through when my son seemed unhappy, and I couldn't figure out why:

1. Gas? Burp him and maybe try a different nursing position. (My son was never diagnosed with reflux, but I did find at times giving him a more propped up nursing position sometimes helped fussiness.

2. Diaper? Clean & dry. Easy to overlook sometimes, but often the #1 cause of Fussy Baby.

3. Temperature? It can get pretty warm nursing. The skin to skin contact is important, but sometimes a fan will help keep you both more comfortable.

4. Your diet? Have you eaten anything that could be affecting the flavor of your milk? Babies this age are more sensative to your diet changes. I know many mothers who were limited to chicken & rice during the first couple of months of nursing, else their babies were "colicky."

5. You may be onto something that at times he just wants something to suck on for soothing purposes, though I've rarely heard of a baby not accepting the breast for that purpose.

First, let me commend you on your instincts, being a first time mom, you seem very comfortable in your new role!
Have you read Dr. Sear's Attachment Parenting book? Even if you arent using an "AP" style, the book offers a lot of insight into newborns and their needs.
Usually if a let-down is too strong they gag, and you'll see milk they arent able to swallow leaking around the mouth after they break the latch. And then they will try to latch again.

I believe you should always follow your baby's cues and feed on demand. My son is 6 months old, and I still feed on demand. Sometimes it every 2 hours, sometimes every 4-5 hours. He knows what he needs better than a clock ever will.

I've never had a baby with reflux, so I cant help you there.

Have you tried other soothing methods, other than nursing when your baby is fussy? Like a sling, or rocking. Sometimes we can misread what our babies are trying to tell us.

I think you are doing a great job. :)

HI J.,

You've gotten great advice so far. I'll just add in that you should make sure that he's getting enough to eat, by weighing him regularly (i.e. once a week) on a baby-sized scale. My son got really fussy around 3 weeks of age. I thought he had colic, but it turned out that I was not making enough milk for him, and he was really hungry. When your baby pulls off, is milk flowing? If you are in the middle of a strong let-down, it can fly across the room! :-)

Make an appointment with a lactation consultant (call your hospital/midwife for a referral) to be sure that feeding issues aren't causing the problem.

Best of luck to you!
C.

I think it might be reflux or gas. I used Gripe Water (found in most pharmacies) for my daughter when she was fussy and it helped.

As for a feeding schedule. I would try to put him on a basic feeding schedule (every 2 hours? during the day, longer at night) Because you will wear yourself out feeding him all the time (burns a lot of calories but makes you very tired).

If you haven't introduced a pacifier yet I wouldn't recommend you do it now. It will be more problems than good down the line (there is an almost 4 year old boy in preschool with a pacifier and diapers). It's harder to say no to them once they get older.

Good Luck!

What you are eating, could be effecting your him. It could be milk, spicy foods, any number of things, It could be causing reflux, too. My sister's son had bad reflux and a hard time eating, until she cut out milk.

My son was the same way at that age, he wanted to suck all day! We finally gave him a pacifier just to give me a break, and that helped a lot. He never got an ear infection until after he was weaned. My let down was really strong, but my son would pull back and cough milk all over me, it was just coming out too fast for him to swallow at first. If you think that is the problem just keep a towel handy, he will stop if it's too much! If he seems frustrated, he might not be getting milk fast enough for his liking. Just try to stay relaxed and keep trying, if you get stressed & tense up it might keep your milk from letting down. Easier said than done, right? If you think he has gas or tummy pains, try Gripe Water or help him move around to relieve the gas. My son would lay in his bed and fuss and pull his legs up like he needed to poop - but if we rubbed his tummy or bounced him until he farted, he would calm right down.

One of the problems a new mother can have with feeding-on-demand is figuring out your baby's cry. Is he really hungry or does he want something else? If he eats when he isnt really hungry then he wont eat much and then in a few minutes he will want more. Perhaps try a schedule and in between just cuddle and rock him. Also try to hold him as upright as possible. I know most hospitals advocate the "football" position, but unless you lean over it is too much of a horizontal position to promote proper digestion. Gravity helps get the milk to his tummy and the air out.

Do you try feeding him on both sides? Male sure to offer both so he goes longer between feedings and expands his stomach. Also try pumping and have your husband feed him to see how much he's drinking.
Good luck!

My daughter did the same thing...wanted to nurse all the time but not for long. She was gaining enough weight so she was eating enough. I finally gave her a pacifier and that solved the problem. She just wanted to suck, not necessarily eat.

I also suggest that he might be more seeking comfort than milk when he's fussy. My grandchildren wouldn't accept pacifiers so that worked out well for them. Their mother and I let them suck on one of our fingers with the nail laying on their tongue while we held them. They also liked to be rocked.

Some moms swear by wearing their babies in a sling or pack, worn either on the front or back. I can see how this would be comforting for a wee little one not yet used to being out in the open. For that reason, swaddling also sometimes helps.

Both of my grandchildren slept strapped into their car seats. The boy did have reflux and by sleeping in his car seat he was more upright which helps the milk stay down. You didn't describe anything that sounds like reflux. My grandson always spit up large amounts even long after he'd nursed. He never seemed to be chewing on anything. His mouth just leaked a lot. lol

The "chewing" could just be his mouth moving as it did in the womb. A baby is constantly swallowing and peeing amniotic fluid before it's born.

I have BFed both children on demand and plan to BFed our third (currently cooking...) the same way.

With my daughter, I also had the pleasure of learning about cluster feeding. This sounds similar to what you might be experiencing. No one ever mentioned this to me. She would nurse for what seemed to be endless sessions, resting only about 10 or 15 minutes in between feedings. This aspect nearly had me in tears, especially since I thought she was not getting enough, but in reality she was fine and I learned she would usually do this when she had a growth spurt.

My little man would almost always spit up (the projectile kind) after feeding.

Also, both my children LIVED on mylacon for about the first 4 to 5 months of their lives. We would give them shot before every nursing session (or BM bottle). We also made sure we did lots of "bicycle" exercises during the day. Besides aiding digestion, it would tire them out (bonus!!)

If you have any more questions, feel free to email me.

Lots of luck!!
~C.

I think you're doing the right thing. I would see if there's an ear infection going on, but it isn't a paci that he needs, nor does it make sense to put a nursing baby on a feeding schedule. If you want a long explaination of how his body needs protein in very small amounts at a time, all through out the day and not on any schedule, PM me. Otherwise, just know that he nurses on his biological schedule and you already know you can't top that. :)

I'm not sure about reflux, but doesn't that happen between meals? Try sitting him up more if you think that might be it, like in football position, while nursing.

Honestly, though, it might just pass as quickly as it came. Don't worry too much and don't change any of your habits unless you have a chronic problem. His little body is adjusting to the world and there will be some bumps. They're not your fault and usually not because of anything you're doing wrong. Change habits if pain gets to be a habit, not an occurance. Wait a couple of weeks at least before you decide that you're doing something wrong. Do check into the earache. If it is, he'll be miserable even when not eating.

I wish you peace.

I definitely agree with some of the others that you should get a pediatrician and make sure they have a lactation consultant, or find a separate lactation consultant. You can call both the ped. and the lactation consultant any time and ask questions like this. I also suggest that you see if you can feel whether the milk is coming out too strong or not soon enough. Sometimes my daughter got fussy if it didn't come out right away. The last thing I noticed with my daughter and my friend noticed this too: sometimes they make feeding cues when they actually have gas. That could explain the leg kicking. Overall, you have to experiment and get to know each other, so give yourselves some time!

.

Something your eatting maybe giving him stomach aches and gas pains. If he starts getting a rash he might be allergic to dairy and your ingesting too much for him. I would keep a food journal and note how he acts after each feeding. Then you can tell if he gets kranky after specific meals.

J.,
My little boy is 6m, he is on solids right now, but was breastfed till now.
I know how you feel because I have been in your situation.
If you have a pump, you can pump some milk out before feeding him and the flow will be easier for him to hadle.
You shouldnt try scheduled at this point, he is too small for that. Keep feeding him on demand. If he spits a lot, try burping him more often, after 5 min of feeding, take him off and burp. Yes, pediatrician definitely, they can offer you all kinds of advise and support, some offices even have a lactation specialist. They can check the baby and tell you if he has a reflux. You could try a pacifier, babies love to suck, it is comforting to them..
My boy didnt take a pacifier. Sleeping varies - my little boy slept 30 min at a time, i rocked him and he would sleep another 30 min, hard to say some babies sleep 1-2 hours at a time. My daughter did that, she is 2.
I hope I aswered all you questions. Hope this helps.

It definitely could be reflux...my daughter started doing the same thing at about 2 weeks....try taking in a really good sea salt of about 3/4 a teaspoon and he will get the salt through your milk...it worked for my daughter within a day. She's now 5 months old and I still take the salt in water everyday. The salt I use is called Premier Pink Salt.

If you have questions let me know!

I would continue nursing on demand at this stage. Perhaps he is tongue tied, so not getting a good latch, and that could cause his upset so early on in the feeding, and the constant waking for food.

Have you visited Baby Center yet? You can join (it's free) and enter in his date of birth. As he grows, it will give you week by week tips on feeding, developmental milestones and ideas on what you can do for things that occur at his stage.

http://www.babycenter.com/

Good luck!

J...first suggestion is to find a pediatrician no matter what! Who has been seeing your baby? I had my baby at the pediatrician a week after he was born and then it seemed every month after that for quite some time. My son was colicky I had a very hard time with breastfeeding - he was miserable...if I had to do it over again, I'd focus more on burping and latching on and position, but I'm sure other woman have MUCH better advice than me since I didn't do so good and wound up switching to soy formula at 6 weeks...