Nervous About Upcoming breastfeeding....Any Advice?

Updated on May 02, 2009
K.L. asks from Bozeman, MT
30 answers

We are expecting our second child in September (just found out it's a girl!) and I am a little nervous about breastfeeding. I had a really hard time with my son and never really got to the point where it felt comfortable or even natural. I think that part of it was probably some of the circumstances....I was in and out of labor for 36 hours before we decided to do a c-section, I had ALOT of pain with the c-section and my son was a biter right from the start....he would bite down and then grind his jaw back and forth....they called him a "baracuda baby." He never did latch on properly and it got to the point where it was so painful that I had to use a nipple shield, then I couldn't get him to nurse without the shield. Also, some of the lactation nurses at the hospital here can be very pushy and I never really felt like I had the proper support. They just kept telling me that "if it hurts, you're doing it wrong." It ALWAYS hurt! My nipples were SO sensitive that it would make me cry every time I nursed (even with the shield) and I ended up with mastitis on top of it. I managed to breast feed my son for 2 months before I had to go in for another surgery in order to remove an enlarged ovary due to benign tumors. I just didn't have the energy or the stamina to try and continue through surgery. I really want to breastfeed for longer this time (6-12 months), but I'm scared that it's just going to end up the same way. I have asked my mom (who breast fed my sister and I for over a year each) to help me this time and I think that will help a little. I am facing another c section, but I think I will be better prepared for at least that part this time. I'm just looking for any advice that anyone might have in how to be better prepared this time around. Is there anything I can do to prepare my nipples? Any tricks to get a baby to latch on? Any advice or experience would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

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So What Happened?

Wow! Thank you all so much for such a HUGE response and for all the GREAT support! I have contacted the local chapter of La Leche League. In speaking with the leader I already feel much better. I am not a mom that feels that breastfeeding is the ONLY way, but I do feel that it can be the best way IF it works out. I was a little nervous about speaking with La Leche League because I have heard that they are VERY anti bottle on ALL counts, but the leader here was very supportive about my entire experience and let me know that if for some reason I decided not to breastfeed exclusively I would NOT be ostracized. I will be going to this months meeting on the 21st and am really looking forward to it. In the meantime I'm going to take a look at 'The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding' from La Leche League and decide if it's something I want to invest in. I am feeling alot better about this already. All of the support and stories of personal experience were a real help in getting me to see that there was no reason this time HAD to be like before. I'm starting to get excited about it rather than scared. I am also not going to let myself feel guilty if this turns out to be a bad experience again and I make the decision to bottle feed. Thanks again for your great support and advice. Sooooo glad I consulted all of you wonderful mamas!!! Happy Day!!

More Answers

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W.A.

answers from Denver on

Many have already said it, but yes, every baby is different when it comes to breastfeeding, so hopefully you'll have a great experience this time around. Also, whatever you can do and your willingness to try, is so great. Being a Mom is hard enough without feeling guilty.

My son couldn't latch correctly because he had a short frenulum. His tongue couldn't stretch far enough to push my nipple to the roof of his mouth. I ended up nursing with the nipple shield for 3 months because that had enough of an extension that he could latch the tip of the shield to the roof of his mouth, and suck instead of bite. The first couple days of feedings involved my Mom and husband helping me to position my son correctly so I could hold the shield in place and squirt pumped milk down the outside so he would figure out he should suck. Ugh! He had fairly severe jaundice the first week too and was really sleepy and couldn't seem to focus on the sucking, but was easily frustrated. I seemed to constantly have clogged ducts and soon mastitis too. Luckily, his mouth grew and he could nurse on his own without the nipple shield at 3 months. Lactation consultants told me I should have his frenulum clipped, but my doctor said it wasn't necessary, and I didn't want to hurt him.

My daughter, had a really strong suck from the beginning, but she had a short frenulum too and didn't latch right. After only 3 days in the hospital, my nipples were black and so sore and cracked. I had her frenulum clipped (so easy she fell asleep during the procedure) by a ear nose and throat specialist on day 4. I used the nipple shield for about a week to let my nipples heal, and then she latched perfectly, and we're still going strong 9 months later. It is such a better experience!

I never made it to a La Leche meeting, but found it very helpful to get advice from several different lactation consultants. You'll have more informed questions the second time around and have your own experience to base the advice on. More confidence too. I found it all to be so much less stressful the second time. Good luck!

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G.G.

answers from Pueblo on

K., there is definitely some questionable advice here. I do not recommend that you prepare or "rough up" your nipples before breastfeeding (it is no longer recommended by any LCs). Also, Lansinoh is not helpful for most cases of sore nipples, but may be if they are cracked. However, addressing latch issues with the first signs of soreness can usually prevent them from becoming cracked.

Here's what I recommend to moms:

Don't stress about positioning, techniques, schedules, etc. You are a second time mom now with much more experience and confidence. Listen to your intuition and watch your baby.

Start attending La Leche League meetings now! Seeing other babies nurse and watching other mothers respond by breastfeeding is very helpful.

Find a good lactation consultant in your area (IBCLC only--not CLC, CLE, etc.). Keep her number on your fridge in case you run into any bumps and call sooner rather than later.

Avoid medications in labor as they (including epidurals) often make it difficult for babies to start off on the right foot. In order to do this, consider hiring a doula for your birth. It may be challenging for you to find someone willing to do a vbac in your area, but it's certainly worthwhile. C-section babies have an even harder time initiating breastfeeding. That being said, if you can't find someone to do a vbac, you can get off to a better start after a c-sec by having the baby brought to you asap, etc.

Good luck--it's almost always easier the 2nd time. Hang in there and congrats for trying again. You can do it!

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D.H.

answers from Denver on

Hi K.,
I had the same experience with the deliveries of my boys. First one ended up with an emergency C-section, so the second baby was a planned one. I struggled with the breastfeeding with the first for different reasons than your own. However, with the second baby and a planned C-section, breastfeeding was totally different in a good way. First I was rested after the c-section because I had a good night sleep before hand. I knew what to expect and I was able to get up and going around later in the day after the delivery. Overall I was much more relaxed and breastfeeding was easier for both me and the baby. So I guess my advice is just take each time you breastfeed in the hospital as a chance to bond with the baby. You won't have to do too much there, but when you get home it will all change. The new challenge will be to balance the energy of your boy and your attention for your girl and all of her needs. I hope this helps and best wishes for a safe delivery.

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H.S.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I would hire a doula. She will help you find the resources you need, help you prepare for your upcoming birth (another c-section is NOT your only option) and then help you set up the birth circumstances in the best way possible so as to get breastfeeding started on the right foot. Many of the doulas are also very knowledgeable about breastfeeding and some also do lactation consulting. You will feel so much better about everything if you have an expert on your side!! Check www.utahdoulas.org for a list... Julie Johnson would be great for you!

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A.E.

answers from Salt Lake City on

1st of all every baby is different. I nursed 4 babies for a year and each one had their own issues. With my last I probably had the hardest time latching on espesially at first. I had to go in my room completely take off my shirt and use the football hold where she is cradled with her feet by your side tucked like a football. My other kids would nurse any where with a blanket but not her.

I did finally get the hang of it, with each one, but you have to look at your situation and if it never gets comfortable do what you can.

I never used a lactation consultant except for the nurses at the hospital but I think that is also a good idea. They can give you different ideas and tips to help you get the baby latched on correctly.

Good Luck

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B.P.

answers from Denver on

My advise is to try it. I had a hard time with my first, only nursed for 3 months. He loved the bottle more. When my daughter came, it was so natural and perfect, no crinkling your toes or making faces, no stacking a pile of pillows to get comfy. I say try it, if it isnt working go to a bottle. You need to do what is right for YOU and your baby. If you dont love it, chances are the new one wont either. Good luck!!!

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C.H.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I didnt have a very positive experience with my first either. Even the lactation nurses in the hospital were not much help, they seemed to make it as if it was completely "natural" and the baby would know what to do and so forth. I dont think I ever got a good latch the first few days as my milk didnt come in till he was around 5 days old! We continued to struggled for the 10 months that I dedicated to trying. I used the nipple sheild for awhile on one side that was more flat but still struggled. We nick named feeding time "Boob War." I was lucky to ever get 4 oz when I pumped and he took over 40 minutes to eat and always seamed hungry. Then the 2nd came along and WOW what a difference. All because I had great support in the hospital and a great lactaion specialist that gave me pointers and tips that I wish I had know about with my 1st. Like to pump in the hospital to help bring in your milk especially if you have a tired baby who wont latch quite yet. (The hospital has one for you to use but sometimes you have to ask) She also helped me realize that the newborn needs just as much help as you do in figuring it out sometimes. In fact she grabbed my nipple(a little weird at first) pinched it to help flatten it and then stuck it in the babies mouth. My thoughts were "You can do that?!" I assumed the baby just knew how. He got the perfect latch and never stuggled again because I knew how to make things work! I never needed a nipple sheild and my milk came in within the next day (due to the stimulation from the pumping) and I had a wonderful experience. I have since had a 3rd and am now expecting our 4th. If you can get good support it makes a world of a difference. I have also learned since my first that if you do the best you can in taking care of your little one regardless of if you nurse or bottlefeed, you will be the BEST mom! Us women need to not be so hard on ourselves! If you would like any more advice please e-mail me.

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S.W.

answers from Pocatello on

Hi K.,

It sounds like you are doing everything you need to do. You are doing your homework and lining up support before the baby gets here. Be careful with nipple preparation because nipple stimulation can cause contractions. If there is a La Leche League in your area, besides your hospital support people, I would suggest asking them for help. You could also look them up online for a local contact person. Its an amazing resource. Also get some lansinoh cream for your nipples and put that on. Its safe for baby to eat and will help heal nipples if they crack and helps with pain too. Also after you nurse(but before cream), put a steeped tea bag on your nipples for a few minutes. Make sure of course its not hot so you don't burn yourself. There is something in the tea that helps with pain and heals the nipples as well. Just regular orange pekoe, tetley, red rose, whatever tea bags... These were some of the things that got me through the first few months until it got easy. Good luck and I hope everything goes well for you and your new little bundle.

S.

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B.N.

answers from Fort Collins on

I can understand your anxiety! I had a similar breastfeeding experience with my first. (Shields, biting, not latching on, falling asleep while feeding, etc.) Including a negative experience with the lactation nurses. They just made everything worse, including making me feel like I was a complete loser. It just wasn't fun for anyone. Then with my second, it was a breeze! She delivered trying to latch on to something. No problems, a little bit of pain which subsided quickly and even a positive experience with a different set of lactation nurses. I also had to have c-sections with both. It's amazing how quickly my body remembered what it had to do and everything just clicked with the second. I hope that everything goes well for you. Good luck!

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J.S.

answers from Salt Lake City on

You've gotten a lot of great responses already. I just wanted to add that each baby is different and just because your first is a barracuda baby, it doesn't mean the next will be. My first has slight issues - but we worked through them. My second nursed with no problems at all. And my 3rd just never got the hang of it - even though I felt like I knew what I was doing. Each of these little ones just come with their own unique issues!

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N.W.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Prep:
-put your palms on your nipples and rub in circles. Pinch nipples a few times. Do this every time you shower.
-Take Lansolin cream with you to the hospital. (it's safe for babies to have in their mouths. Massage it onto your nipples AFTER each time you nurse.)
-You can even massage Lansolin cream onto your nipples before baby is born.

Remember:
-Baby's sucking reflex is on the roof of her mouth. Before nursing the first time, and anytime she has trouble, trigger the sucking reflex by gently rubbing the pad of your finger (the side opposite of your fingernail) on the roof of her mouth until she's sucking well.

-shove as much of your breast into her mouth as you can (this is the KEY to good breastfeeding)

-Sometimes it does hurt. BUT the pain should DECREASE after the first 20 sucks each time she eats. If it gets worse, she's not on right.

-It takes 2 weeks for your baby to catch on. Don't give up before she's 15 days old. Seriously, she'll just magically get it that day. Be firm about this - don't any doctor bully you into giving up before 15 days old.

Starting out: (put a pillow or 2 under where baby's head will be)
Positioning:
-rub your nipple so it firms up (like you practiced)
-Cup your RIGHT breast in your RIGHT hand.
-Hold the back of baby's head in your LEFT hand. (baby's backbone along your left arm, baby's tummy against your tummy, baby's feet to your left)
-with your RIGHT HAND: thumb lined up with baby's nose, fingers on opposite side of breast, squeeze - squishing/flattening your breast. (You want to pinch your breast BEHIND the colored part that's around the nipple. You pinch it all the way so your thumb and fingers can feel each other. This is so you can get a good grip and put your breast exactly where you want it.)

Going In:
-draw on baby's upper lip to get her to open her mouth.
-if she turns away, draw on the side you want her to turn towards. (baby can't swallow half as well if her neck is turned at all.)
-Now it's a matter of timing. When her mouth is opened as wide as she'll open it, SHOVE your nipple as far into her mouth as you can. (really you pull her head onto your nipple. Your body should stay put...but sometimes it helps to shove your nipple and then bring yourself up to sitting position bringing baby with you. Don't hurt your back.)
-deep breath in and out. Relax.

-the letdown or initial sucking will hurt - especially if your nipple is already cracked. BUT even a cracked nipple will stop hurting after a 45 seconds of sucking IF the latch is good. Rule of thumb: If it starts hurting more, she's not on right. It should stop hurting after 1 minute. It will hurt before that.

If the latch is NOT good, slide a finger into her mouth to break suction and then remove your breast from her mouth. You didn't get enough of your breast into her mouth.
-let baby practice sucking on your finger
-get her to open her mouth bigger
-really SHOVE your breast in her mouth next time. (no worries, you're not going to gag her. The more breast in her mouth the better.)

That position is the easiest to teach your baby how to nurse. After she catches on a bit, you can switch to a position that's more comfortable - like holding her in the crook of your right arm and holding your right breast with your left hand.

But, when she's first learning, it's easiest to hold her like I've described.

So...print this out and take it with you to the hospital and you're good to go :)

If she gets a good latch, let her nurse for 15-20 minutes before taking her off to burp her and switching sides. This rewards her for the good latch.

If your nipple is cracked or bleeding....have her start on the other nipple first (the least hurt one). This is because she sucks harder on the first nipple than the second one.

That's it. She'll be a total pro in 2 weeks. ...and you'll be a pro even sooner. Best Wishes :)

PS Tickle her toes, rub her head and jaw, and open up her blankets if she falls asleep too quickly. Sometimes you need a nurse or lactation specialist to help you tickle her if you can't juggle it with just 2 hands.

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M.K.

answers from Provo on

Just a little suggestion if breastfeeding becomes unbearable as before, which I am sorry about, try pumping and feeding or half and half. I believe you are supposed to wait like two weeks before you start pumping but you could talk to your doctor about that. If she won't take the bottle try dipping the nipple in some of your milk first.
I have found that if I hold my breast between two fingers I can help put more of the areola in my daughter's mouth and it helps with pain. Good luck. Hopefully your nipples will be less sensitive this time because of last time:)

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S.L.

answers from Boise on

Does it help to know that all babies are different? It sounds to me that your biggest problem was an aggressive baby who just wasn't that interested in learning how to do it right.

Let me tell you something my best friend told me once, when I gave up on something that was supremely difficult. She said, "You didn't quit! Hello, you tried way harder than most people do. You didn't QUIT, you just recognized when it wasn't going to work anymore and stopped torturing yourself." I can't believe that you stuck it out that long with your son! I probably would have switched to pumping.

My first son was a lot gentler on me. My peeve with him was that he would come off to look around, and I'd spray all over! Little did I know that I'd wish my second son would do that! Instead of letting go to look around, he'd clamp down so it wouldn't come out while he looked around, and yanked me around quite hard.

I also had a hard labor before emergency c-section with my first. It was so exhausting! They sort of encouraged me to get up and walk around, but I was so tired and it hurt so bad that I didn't do it much. 11 days later I could hardly walk without searing pain. 3 months later, the pain finally started to fade, but still hurt sometimes when I sat up too fast or sneezed. It was awful. And I was quite active by 3 months later. We'd gone hiking all over the state, and I'd almost lost all the baby weight.

The second time, it was a scheduled c-section. Although i didn't react too well to the spinal block medication, my recovery was much better. I liked my nurses a lot better in that hospital. They helped me get up and told me why they wanted me to do things. I took laps around the Mom & Baby Ward pushing the bassinet, and it really didn't hurt that bad. A few days after I got home, I could walk and stand for long periods of time. It was a much better recovery!

So you'll have that to look forward to.

And just take this new baby as she comes. See how she does with nursing. They say that you should stick it out for 2 weeks, because it gets better after that. Even with a nice gentle baby, it can hurt and be tough for the first 2 weeks. I kid you not, I cried and was moments away from giving up with my first baby on day 14. Day 15 magically didn't hurt nearly as bad!

I'm sure my thoughts aren't very cohesive, but I hope you catch the gist!

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B.

answers from Boise on

Hi K.,
Oh, I'm so sorry that you had that experience. That's so rough! :(
I've breastfed 2 now and am due to have one more in June. All I can say is all kids are different, make sure you get good latches in the first week, and it ALWAYS hurt me no matter how they latched for the first 6 weeks, until my nipples were used to that. :)
HTH,
B.

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J.C.

answers from Denver on

K.,
My friend had a hard time nursing her first baby. She said her girl just didn't latch well. But when her second baby came, he loved nursing and latched on easily. Every baby is different, and I hope you won't have the unfortunate experience of 2 baracuda babies.
J.

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J.S.

answers from Provo on

I think over all, the first breastfeeding is the worse because you are not sure what you are doing and it's new. I have a sister-in-law who had a similar experience. Very long delivery followed by a baby who would not nurse correctly, she got mastitis and the sores on her nipple who out of this world. It took her 6 months for her to finally enjoy it a little bit. She currently has 5 kids. Her first was the only one with this problem. The rest of them, she was able to correct any problems with the first feeding and she has never had similar problems since. She actually enjoyed breastfeeding the rest of her babies. (And she is considering having another one!)

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S.S.

answers from Denver on

I recommend checking out kellymom.com. It is a very helpful site about breastfeeding and parenting.

My only personal advice I can give is about the nipple prep. I had a problem with highly sensative nipples my first few times around and it was recommended to me to "play with them". Pinch, twist, pull! Do anything you can to toughen them up. The first month is usually very tough on a breastfeeding mom, but pushing through that time will help prepare you for the rest of the time you breastfeed. Hope that helps! Be sure to check out that site.

Have a GREAT day!

S.

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H.W.

answers from Provo on

I was another one of those women who had a hard time the first time around. I feel for you!

Don't let anyone make you feel guilty for the choices you make about breastfeeding. If you would like to do it, then find someone who is kind and understanding and helpful but not too pushy.

The ladies of La Leche League are super helpful but they're also a bit militant about nursing being the only way to do things. I would start asking around for people who have had similar situations who live close and can give moral support. Because really that's what you need most.

Every kid really is different. My second latched on immediately and had no issues at all. You never know how your second might react.

Good luck!

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M.P.

answers from Denver on

Hi K.! First, congrats on your second. I am a mom of a 3 year old (emergency c-section) with HORRIBLE breastfeeding issues and we never got it quiet right. I just had my 2nd (successful VBAC) and she is 10 weeks old and so far so good. I would suggest talking to an IBCLC and possibly doing a private breastfeeding session with her knowing you have already gone the route of a breastfeeding class. I am also going to throw out there the store Sweet Beginnings in Littleton (www.oursweetbeginnings.com). I actually opened this boutique and wellness center for reasons especially like yours. I was as scared as could be with my second but so far so good. We have an IBCLC on staff you can chat with to help ease your mind if you feel that is a road you would like to take. Hope it helps and congrats again on your pregnancy!

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K.G.

answers from Pocatello on

Well, I am breastfeeding my second son, and it's going WAY better than with the first! With my first he was a barracuda baby so it hurt when he nursed for the first few weeks and then got better, but my nipples were always pretty sensitive. It hurt if the water hit them in the shower and if anything rubbed over them, like a bath towel or clothing. I also had plugged ducts a lot. I just figured that's how it was supposed to be, but with my second I haven't had any problems! He's not a barracuda my nipples are not sensitive at all! Maybe they toughened up after the first time, I don't know. No plugged ducts this time either. I was pretty nervous to nurse my second but I think because I'd already been through it once it's a lot better. Maybe it will be the same for you! Oh, and if at any point your nipples get REALLY sore and you think it's unusual, get checked for a yeast infection on your breast. I had one within 3 weeks after having my second and it HURTS!!!! Your baby might get it on her bottom, too, that's how I figured out what it was! Hope this helps, sorry it's so long!

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R.S.

answers from Denver on

1st and foremost: Relax, kids are sooooooooo different!

My first born son was sooooooo tough. But my second born due to me being relaxed was soooooo much easier. One thing that really helped me was: ONLY until my milk came in full force....I would put the baby on the empty breast first (remember their suction is strongest at first and they get the rich milk this way), then I would switch the baby to the fuller breast a couple minutes into the feeding....Also I nursed the baby every 2 to 2 1/2 hours while in the hospital, don't let that baby sleep the first 24-48 hours wake it up to eat that will stimulate your milk supply quickly. (All this via the advice of a nurse). It worked AWESOME, she was pooping normal stool before we left the hospital. Keep in mind, no two babies are alike....It would be a major coincidence for your second to move his/her jaw the same way as the first. Also REST at the hospital, I didn't change a diaper or burp (longer than 5-10 min), I would hand off the baby to a nurse a for a few minutes. It made a huge difference! Research says that you can't really prepare your nipples, just make sure you always slip a finger between the baby's gums and break the suction before removing the baby from your breast. And if it hurts the first or tenth time you put the baby at your breast break the suction and try again. It might be mildly uncomfortable after the first nursing or 2, but the faster you and baby learn to get him/her on without any pain the less discomfort you'll have due to having less 'healing' to go through. Oh and I have heard having a planned vs. unplanned C-section makes all the difference when it comes to nursing!

Hang in there! Worse case scenario you use formula and thank God or whomever that we have that option now adays!

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M.C.

answers from Denver on

Hi K.,

I didn't read many of the other responses, so if I repeat, sorry!

I had a bit of a similar situation with my first. Couldn't get the latch on right, the nurses insisted in giving my preemie a bottle, which made my son have nipple confusion.

The second time around worked like a charm. I had decided that I was going to make it work. I told the nurses when I arrived at the hospital that my baby would be breast fed only, which I didn't even know you could do when I had my first.

I also didn't purchase any bottles or have any formula on hand which made it easy for me to know that my baby was depending on me only. I had the lactation lady come in until I was completely comfortable and knew what I was doing.

There is a book by Dr. Sears I think, and it's called the breastfeeding book if I remember correctly. It helped me a ton, and I made sure to read it before my baby was due to help me in knowing more what I was doing.

Just remember this is a natural thing that women have been doing for thousands of years and there are tons of resources out there if you need them. La Leche League was always helpful, along with other friends that succesfullly breastfed their babies.

I wish you the best of luck, don't be scared, just be patient and I am sure it will come to you!

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D.W.

answers from Boise on

First I want sorry that you've had to go thru such an ordeal with your first baby! Each one of my 3 children was a different story with breastfeeding.
I had a bad experience with my first child too. No one told me you have to pump a little bit when you first get your milk so that it's not "rock hard" and so your baby can latch on. I went to the Le Leche League and got help 4 days after I had my baby. I was in tears because I wanted it to work so badly, plus I hurt really bad! Well, it worked and I nursed her until she was 2.
My second child (3 years later)latched on the first try -- my midwife was absolutely amazed. I didn't have to pump with her either (I thought it was because I was a "pro" at that point). My third child (4 years later)took a little effort and pumping of my engorged breasts. That was the first time the uterus contractions hurt me for the first 2-3 weeks too (so not fun, but it's worth it if you can get past the first 2 months).
The first 4-6 weeks hurts for the first 5-10 seconds when they latch on, but it shouldn't hurt after that. Then after that period of time, it doesn't hurt at all anymore. It's so nice not having to buy formula and worry about making a bottle in the wee hours of the morning or while you are out and about. I'm one that enjoys it.
I haven't done this, but someone told me to start putting Lansinoh on your breasts everyday when you are about 7 months pregnant. I might try that too??

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S.M.

answers from Casper on

If breastfeeding hurts, it could mean that your baby is doing it wrong. Those darn nipple nazis!

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J.W.

answers from Pueblo on

This is a popular question to respond to, which I will take a step further and say you have a lot of support!

With my first, I never got the hang of the hold you were supposed to start with (the cross cradle). When she was six weeks old, colicky, and nursing every 1 1/2 to 2 hours, I went to my first La Leche League meeting. I walked in carrying her in her car seat, a huge diaper bag and a boppy pillow. What a riot! They took time during and after the meeting to show me different feeding positions and I was hooked! Breastfeeding became so much easier.

The nurses in the hospital weren't helpful to me either time around. Everyone has a different idea of what breastfeeding should look like. My second child was a breastfeeding pro from the first feeding and I still had nurses telling me I was doing it wrong.

I would love to recommend my doula for you - she's in Pueblo, but I think she'll travel. Her website is http://safepassage.wordpress.com/

She does childbirth classes that I have observed after being done having kids that I would highly recommend. She is also a past LLL leader with non-judging, helpful suggestions.

Good luck and congratulations!

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M.B.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Krisin,
My heart goes out to you! Breastfeeding can be challenging at time, but also one of the most beautiful bonding experiences you can have with your baby. I would definitely recommend that you get in touch with your local La Leche League group. They are like a breastfeeding support group who are there to offer support and expert advice based on decades of research and training. There is no cost to join, but you might go to a meeting and see what you think. Their website is http://www.llli.org/ and you can search for groups in your area. Best of luck to you!!

M.

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D.K.

answers from Denver on

Every pregnancy is different. Every breast feeding experience can be different. I think you are best to make sure your hospital has a Lactation specialist on hand at the hospital. I am sure having a csection didn't help matters either for you. Contact a local La Leche league around you as they can best answer all your questions.

Whatever happens don't set yourself up for expectations, just go with the flow. I planned on breast feeding until the year mark with my two and it didn't work out that way.
I am going to be honest here at the risk of all hell breaking loose, but I did not enjoy breast feeding at all!! I got beat up by La Leche, looked down on in mom's groups because I was honest enough to say I just did not like breast feeding. It was not pleasant for me so I pumped, I gave my babies breast milk, I loved how they held my fingers and looked me straight in the eyes while eating. The bond was just as tight as if breast fed directly. I just wasn't going to spend my time with my baby frustrated. I loved feeding time, I loved snuggling them. I just didn't have to breast feed to make that bond tight.

All I can say is it is different for every woman, it in NO way is a measure of your success as a mother. Some moms would nurse until the child is in college, others for that first year, others like me are honest enough that it was so hard and uncomfortable that they stopped. My babies were both fed breast milk for as long as I could, we had an AMAZING close bond, both are very healthy even when we went to formula and neither has allergies. Just don't worry as much and all you can do is have a plan A and a plan B if it doesn't work out.

Just relax, you may be surprised and this next time it will be a breeze.
I will pray it all falls into place, but if it doesn't please don't be hard on yourself or upset.
All you can do is try, get professionals to help you out and see how it goes.

My daughter was too tiny to suckle well and I had been on Mag Sulfate due to preeclampsia, so she was right to a bottle. I pumped breast milk too though for her.

My son, came out knowing exactely what to do, very hungry and did great at it. My nipples were cracked, I was miserable trying to keep him full. I just couldn't keep him satisfied and he would have been at the breast every 30 minutes if I let him and I switched to bottles and pumping for him. Then gradually to formula. I sought help, advise and all of that and I just resolved it was okay not to push it any longer and enjoy my baby.

Try to concentrate on the great things going on for you in preparation. All you can do is get some information but try not to worry.
Good luck and God bless, such an exciting time for you!

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C.C.

answers from Denver on

I was as nervous as you were. My baby is now 3 months old, and the only thing I wanted to say with you is that you have to stick with it. Around 5 or 6 weeks it got so much better. It was very uncomfortable amd un-natural. At one point, I was in Target at 10:00 at night buying a nipple shield because I was going to quit.

It is not easy, but does get SO much easier if you hang in there. The rewards of doing it are also so awesome!

It is not a bad idea to find a good lactation consultant. Things like just changing your hold can give a sore nipple time to heal.

In both Loveland and Fort Collins their are Breastfeeding support groups, and they are very helpful. Call Wee Steps, or if you are in a different area, find out what resources are available!

Best of luck to you!

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T.W.

answers from Salt Lake City on

best advice. . . . go to a la leche league meeting BEFORE your baby comes along (start now). You'll find great info, wonderful mother to mother support, and moms with lots of varied experiences. Plus you'll get some information on starting out with breastfeeding. The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding is the best book I can recommend. Martha Sears' The Breastfeeding Book is a bit of a quicker read that will give you a lot of great info as well. Depending on where you live, we have a La Leche League meeting in Murray the first Tuesday of each month (that's in 4 days) at noon, or in Sandy the second Tuesday of each month at 10am. ____@____.com if you'd like a little more info, I'm a leader with the Murray group, would love to chat. Congrats on baby #2!!!!

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G.P.

answers from Boise on

K., I haven't read the other responses, so forgive me if I am repeating other advise, but I sooo know what you are going through, that I had to respond.

I ended up with an emergency c-section too (although I don't think it added to the breastfeeding issues). I had major trouble breastfeeding because I was engorged, which the LC's didn't believe and I started cracking and bleeding at day 2. This led to severe damage, that a year later, I am still monitoring (and still breastfeeding). I was also told that the latch is wrong if it hurts and was told to take him off and put him on over and over till it didn't hurt. This made my son mad and caused me more pain. Turned out it was the engorgement and my self treating (since I didn't get help from doctors or LCs) that caused the issues, and his latch was perfect. I persevered through it, and I am so glad I did. I finally got some help at about 4.5 weeks.

So first, you need to find a breastfeeding support group. If you are in Boise or Meridian, they have a Breastfeeding Bunch where you can go and have a (really great and caring) LC watch you and assist you through breastfeeding. But I would find this before the birth and make sure that you are comfortable with the LC and the meeting. If you aren't, either go to the other location, or make an appointment with a different LC (don't rely on help over the phone - I had thought that they were only available over the phone!). Talk over your fears and get some advice beforehand.

For some reason I really didn't like the LC in the hospital that just glanced at me while chatting with the nurse. So, second, don't put up with an unattentive LC at the hospital. Demand that they see you early, and often, and don't check out till you get the help that you need.

And third, have the LC office number available. If it is after hours, call the hospital's on call nurse, she may be able to find an LC if she can't help you herself. If you need help, make an appointment ASAP. Your mom can be great support, but if you are anything like me at that time, I had little patience, so make sure that she has the LC number a head of time if she needs to make the call and set up an appointment for you.

Nursing, even perfectly normal nursing can, and most likely will hurt. I have been told that this peaks at 2 weeks, and that it can take about 6 weeks for you and the baby to really figure it out together. So, if you reallly are committed, and can stick through the pain (Tylenol can help), you will be very rewarded. Just don't be afraid to get the help that you need and deserve. Good luck!!

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