Need Sleep Help Desperately

My son will be 4 months on the first of February. This is my first, so I am still learning as I go. my son had similar issues falling asleep. For a few days, instead of jumping to pick him up, I just watched him. He would not cry right away, just act very agitated. It took me awhile to realize this is how he self sooths. He kicks and fusses for about two minutes, then just falls asleep. it is the weirdest thing to watch. I am not an advocate of "crying it out". But I did have to learn how he self soothed. Everyday is a learning experiance and everyday I have a new theory!! :)

Putting a pacifer in my babies mouth and giving her some good patting action (while in crib) is working wonders at getting my baby back to sleep and then the next night she sleeps better!

Buy (on amazon.com) 'The Complete Sleep Guide for Contented Babies and Toddlers,' by Gina Ford (Vermilion 2006).

Hey B.!!

You little one is more than likely experiencing growth spurts, at this age it is very common. And, many infants even begin to experience teething at this age.

My son and I co-sleep, as he was unable to sleep for longer than 40 minutes in a crib or bassinet without waking and being awake for long periods. So, I got a co-sleeper and he slept for good chunks of 2-3 hours at a time in between feedings and let me get some more rest.

Don't worry find the solution that works best for you...I never used my son's very nice crib and I just had to get over it. I have loved co-sleeping and even became an Attachment Parent because of the philosophy.

Good Luck!

Deanna

B., I highly recommend a co-sleeper, also. It's like a bassinet/crib that is missing a side. The open side fits snug against the side of the bed so baby is right next to you, but you will not roll over on him while you are sleeping. Having baby so close made it easier to fall back asleep and baby could still smell me/feel my warmth. You can find them in excellent shape through your local craigslist, for half the price. Best of luck and keep up that breastfeeding!!

Your baby is only 4 months and clearly wants to still be near you and touching you. Remember he spent 9 months in the coziness of your womb! I suggest co-sleeping. If you can breastfeed lying down, then you barely even wake up. There is no crying and everyone sleeps well! Best thing I've ever done for myself, my baby and my sanity!

Hi B.,

You didn't specify your feelings on co-sleeping but that is my recomendation! I prefer Dr. Sears book "Attachment Parenting" over The Tracy Hogg book. Think about it he has been growing inside you he is already used to sleeping with you. You aren't creating a new habit or a bad habit by keeping him with you, you are fostering what he already knows and obviously likes :)

My husband and I are expecting our fourth and we just moved another bed into our room and scooted them together so we'll have plenty of room when the baby comes. We joked about how silly and hill billy our bedroom looks right now and I pointed out it is a BEDroom not a model home and its not forever. You need sleep! Do whatever it takes to get it while being true to your mommy heart! All the best!

Smiles,
Steph

I recommend a co-sleeper. It is a little bassinet where one side of the rail folds down and you put it right next to your bed. That way baby is close, but in his own space. When you first start hearing him stir, you pick him up and breastfeed him in your bed, before he really wakes up. Don't wait until he starts crying. You want him to still be almost asleep. Then you can hold him for a little bit in your bed until you are sure he is asleep and then transfer him over. You can do all of this without actually getting out of bed, which will help you get back to sleep faster. My son is 2 months old and wants to eat every two hours. I have learned to breastfeed laying down in bed and I can usually fall back to sleep while he feeds. When he is done, I just transfer him right back. The key is to not let him wake up all the way. My husband doesn't even wake up when I feed the baby, because I can get him before he starts to cry, so he gets a good night sleep. So don't let that worry you. Try the Dr. Sears Baby Book! I have used it for both my kids and it is a LIFE SAVER!!!!

We have 5 children the youngest being 19 months. All of their sleep patterens were different. All of them slept through the night by six weeks except our 19 month old. She is still up at night. I do still nurse her at night. I am going back to work and struggling like you. Up until now we have co-slept together. We had her crib with one rail off so it could be pushed up against our bed. When she needed to nurse, I tried to roll closer , but honestly, most times she just came back over to my bed. Now I think it is more of a habit for her, but it really helped to get sleep. My husband is not a big CIO fan, so she doesn't get to cry when he is home. She is older now and things are starting to change. Trying to get a good routine during the day and then night time routines are essential. Bath, book (even at this age), nursing and then sleep. Read the books suggested (go read enough to get the gist and then decide which book (philosophy)you want to go with and finiah that book! I can't remember which book I read with the 14 year old and I haven't tried anyone with the 19 month old. But it will give you a different point of view.
Good Luck! If you have the chance to nap when your little one is napping, take advantage. The dishes will wait!

Have you tried giving him a pacifier once he's in the crib? I have a four month old I breastfeed as well. When he wakes up in the crib, I put that in his mouth and it's back to sleepytime...

Good luck!

-M

It might just be he's waking when your body heat is missing. I didn't notice other comments mentioning this. When you hold him - wrap a blanket round him. You don't need to swadle - just have the blanket around him so it holds in his body heat, this will take longer for him to get cold once you have placed him down.

another thought - use the breast-friend to breast feed him at night. that has more of a flat surface (similar to a mattress).

I hear you on this one, with my son I didn't even want to go to bed at night because I knew I was just going to get right back up again... over and over and over.... I finally broke down and moved him into our bed (feeling like a total failure). Guess what? We both got more sleep, he still nursed through the night, but there was no crying, no getting up and down, no hanging over the side of the crib rubbing his back while he screamed.... you get the picture. He moved into a twin bed scooted right up next to ours at about 20 months, and then moved into his own room (by his own request) at 2 1/2yrs. Now at four yrs I tuck him in sing a song and go back to check on him every ten minutes (by the second time he's asleep). Our daughter was a dream sleeper right away... but now at 7mths hs decided she doesn't like being alone in her room, and is up every 1-2 hours. So guess what???? I moved her into our bed two nights ago... and we're all sleeping again :):) Just go with your gut, and get sleep where and when you can, and don't think that babies HAVE to be in cribs - this is just a Western idea that USUALLY doesn't work well for babies or mommies! It is hard to let go of whatever idea you thought was going to work (if I just "train" him/her she'll sleep in her bed like "normal" babies should), but believe me... there are many more mom's out there who are dealing with the same stuff as you than you can imagine (why do you think there are so many books and products to try to get babies to sleep through the night in a crib???) Just remember that this too will pass - even if in a giant sleepless blur! Good luck! Oh, and when I had just my son, I would lay down and take a nap EVERY time he did (up to three times a day!!!)

Not sure if this is something you'd be interested in trying, but I took what I liked from it and tossed out the rest of the ideas and now my baby who is 6 months old is only waking up once in the night to eat and has been for almost 2 months. I'm not a big fan of the cry it out system, however I have let him cry a little bit here and there when he wakes up much earlier than he should from his naps and sometimes he falls back to sleep. My rule is never to rush straight into his room when he wakes up, let him fuss it out a bit but if it gets to a point of real crying then I go in to check on him. The other thing I have tried to do is create a nap system, which seemed to help a lot with night sleep.

I have uploaded the ebook to this link, so you can go to this link and download the PDF ebook. Click on the link, then click on the file and then click to download.
http://www.mediafire.com/?sharekey=bdb2da51954a5dcce62ea5...

Let me know if you have any problems getting it. Hope it helps!

My daughter was the same way,and I also breast fed her. What seemed to help her transition to 3 wakes a night was; after she fed, either my husband or I held her until she fell back to sleep and then we would lay her down in the crib and keep an open palm on her chest so that she could still feel the warmth and contact that she wanted. We would do that for about 5 minutes until her breathing changed indicating that she was in deep sleep. She now wakes 2 times a night and they are very quick wake moments. She feeds and she fall right back to sleep. I hope this helps.
Sincerely
J.

Since you are not sleeping anyway run the vacuum. That noise can be soothing to the baby.

B. -- Oh, boy, does this sound familiar. My firstborn was exactly the same way and it was really horrible. My advice to you is to bring him into bed with you and let him nurse/sleep next to you. That way there's no disruptive transition from your arms to the crib to wake him back up again. You still won't get a solid 8 hrs. sleep every night but you'll probably get more than what's happening now. Of course, at some point you WILL have to wean him out of your bed and back into his crib and then you WILL have a difficult period of sleeplessness. However, if you can co-sleep reasonably well until he is old enough to get through the night without nursing, then you can tackle moving him to the crib and going all night without food more or less at the same time. In retrospect I realize that my son repeatedly woke up and screamed every time I put him in his crib because he had gotten into the habit of nursing himself to sleep and couldn't get back to sleep any other way. I couldn't let him scream like that, either, but boy, the sleep deprivation was killing me. When he was about 8 or 10 months old it dawned on me that he was old enough to get through the night without nursing. We were not co-sleeping (I don't know why!) but at that point was when I had to let him cry to a certain degree to break him of the habit of expecting to nurse repeatedly during the night. It was hard but at least I knew he wasn't starving. At 11 months old he was finally sleeping peacefully all night with no problems and it was like I got my life back again -- and parenting became truly fun. So try cosleeping for another four to six months and then work on the separation. Another caveat is that when he starts teething he MAY use you as a teething ring and not want to let go of your breast even when he's in the bed with you. That's what my daughter did, at age about 4-5 months, and I had to start putting her down in her own crib at that point because she was chewing on my nipple and keeping me awake when I'd try to go back to sleep in my bed, so I had to do the ease-her-into-her-own-room-and-let-her-cry-a-bit-longer-each-night technique. She is very stubborn and it took 6 weeks, aaarrrgghhh! But she, too, became a very good sleeper with no fussing or problems after that. Good luck. Do whatever necessary to get some sleep for yourself, it is hugely important. :-)

Have dad put him down! This is a partnership and you need help because it doesn't help your milk supply to be exhausted. What we would do is I would go in and feed, change and all that and if my baby (I have three) didn't go to sleep, I'd tell my husband it was his turn. Yes, he worked during the day but he also knew that this is temporary and I needed the sleep. He'd swaddle them, rock them, etc. I'd get sleep until the next feeding.

www.sleepbabysleep.com

I feel for you. This is one of the hardest things about having babies. What if you were to place him in bed awake and rub his back (or tummy) until he sleeps or calms down? Sort of a compromise between holding them till they sleep and CIO. It may take more energy at first but could help make progress. I used to lay my baby back in her bassinet awake and then litteraly pray with desperation to God that she would fall back asleep again. Sometimes she would fuss for a bit, but not to full agitation. I say that I would pray to show the level of desperation I felt to get some sleep, but hey what can it hurt, it seemed to work for me. And if its true that we "have not because we ask not" its worth a try. The man upstairs knows you must be near death at this point (I certainly felt I was near death and I was only getting up 2-3 time a night)!

Pick up the book "Sleeping Through the Night". Both of my kids were breastfed and sleeping through the night by 6 mt.s...my son at 4 mt's. It involves teaching them to self soothe. It works!

Congratulations on your baby. You need sleep. I wholeheartedly recommend The Baby Whisperer by Tracy Hogg, specifically The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems. It is a must-read if you need sleep and sanity and does not recommend crying it out. I used it on my last two babies and it was very balanced and helpful. God bless you!

I'd suggest a couple of things--one, make sure that the crib sheet isn't cold. I put down a flannel blanket over the crib sheet so my little guy doesn't hit a colder surface after being warmly snuggled against mommy. Two, maybe consider elevating the crib a little bit--you can stack books underneath the crib feet if needed. Might make him more comfy. Might also try music instead of white noise? Our little guy was super-sensitive for a few weeks around 4 months and then worked it out--maybe time will fix it?

Good luck!

I'm sure this comment has come up already (I didn't read any), but have you considered co-sleeping? When done safely, it is a great way for you and your child to get some sleep. Consider it. At least read up on it.

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/t102200.asp
http://urlSlayer.com/PJYu
http://www.evalillian.com/SafeCoSleeping.aspx
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070600.asp
http://hubpages.com/hub/Co-Sleeping-Safely--and-saving-yo...

Whether or not you co-sleep, transferring can be tricky. Many times I end up transferring my baby to my bed (since it's so much easier for me than to the crib) and take precautions to make sure they won't fall if they roll in their sleep or suffocate with too much bedding. Good luck!
~N.

Against my peditrican's wish, I co-sleep with my baby (who's going on 6 months now). I've done that with my other two as well. I do have a firm bed so she won't roll over against my weight and I put a wedge pillow between us as well. She still gets up at least twice a night but I think more out of habit/comfort than being hungry. She's formula fed in the day and breastfeed at night/weekends (work f/t). I haven't slept more than 5hrs straight in over 5yrs (got a 5yr, 3yr and 6mo)and have an "eye twitch" (per my doctor caused by physical exhaustion). I would never let my children "cry it out"~ takes longer to calm them down in my opinion. it'll get better, hang in there!

Hi B.,
My daughter is ths same age but doing pretty well in the sleep arena at night anyway...she is a cat napper during the day so doesn't sleep much more than 30-45 minutes at time. She is also exclusively breast fed. Here are just some suggestions that may or may not help. I give her a bath at about 7:30 most nights as it tends to relax her. They make a baby wash with lavendar in it I think that is suppose to be calming. (I don't use it but I have heard it works well). She gets fed at 8 or 8:15pm then will normally fall asleep. I tend to hold her until I know she is in that deep sleep cycle. If she is in the REM cycle she will also wake up when I put her in her bed. I still swaddle her but I leave her arms out or make it pretty loose around her arms as she has them worked out every morning anyway. The one time she wakes up at night is between 3-4 and I give her a bottle of breast milk. I normally pump in the morning for this feeding. It ensures you know how much they are getting. Normally she gets about 4 ounces at this point which is about all I can get into her before she goes back to sleep. Your son may just not be eating enough with all the feedings at night and just using you as a snack bar. My daughters is still being fed every 2 to 2 1/2 hours during the day until 8pm.
The other thing is that he is now 4 months old...you might ask your pediatrician about adding some sort of rice cereal or whatever you prefer to some breast milk at night to see if that helps fill him up. All the waking up is not only hard on you but I would think him as well.
I hope this helps a bit.

Hi B.,
I am sorry you are so sleep deprived. Night time was a nightmare for me too. Check out www.guardiansleeper.com. Lots of moms have found this helpful in increasing sleep duration and it has a money back guarantee. I wish it had been around for my precious little girl.
C. :-)

Hi there, I got that model child for my oldest, now 13, and I wish that someone had run this by me when she was your son's age. You might want to check out SID, sensory integration disorder. Don't freak out when you read about it - they always give you the worst case sceneario and it's not typical. At any rate, there are aspects of this that touch on my oldest and learning how to deal with it and be proactive has made my life, and hers, so much better! If you're near Alta Dena and you think it will be of interest there is a woman named Connie Lillas, who is truly a ground breaker in this field. Good luck and work on the attachment item, kinda crucial!

Hi B.! Congrats on your little boy, and wow, do I feel your pain. I had this exact problem with my first daughter, as she would wake up as soon as she left the warmth of my body after nursing. So... we came up with a creative solution. I had a neck warmer called a 'bucky', which is filled with buckwheat hulls inside a fabric covered sleeve. It is designed to be heated in the microwave and then put on an adults' neck, but we decided to put it in the crib to heat up the place where our daughter would lay. When it was time to put her down, we would scoot it slightly to the side, so that the warmth was next to her on the same side as my body had been, and the crib sheet had been pre-warmed. This helped ENORMOUSLY, as she usually didn't notice the transfer because the warmth was still there.

Good luck to you!!! If there is any more support I can offer you, let me know!

Check out www.sleepyplanet.com they are the best! But you should know that sleep training does not usually start until about 6 months or so. Good luck...from another sleep deprived mom.

B. - you poor thing! I can sort of sympathise - I have a 4 1/2 month old whose sleep pattern is pretty variable (we're breast feeding and not crying it out either). Sleep deprivation is an awful thing, and you are doing really well to be able to string sentences together! It looks like you have got some good advice from some of the mums on this site that is worth trying. I read a heap of "sleep solution books" (we're pretty isolated where we are so it's difficult to ask mums face to face), and the one I found most helpful was Elizabeth Pantley's "The No-Cry Sleep Solution". It had some great ideas about settling and sleeping, and although it wasn't an instant fix was nice and gentle and fitted in with my view on parenting.
Hopefully the advice from here will work for you (at this stage you're probably too tired to read a book!); and if you get stuck, then it may be worth trying to borrow it from your local library.
Good luck, and remember that this phase can't last forever (it just feels that way :-) )
N.

Just want to let you know you're not alone!!! My 4 month old has regressed a bit this week and we were up many times the past few nights. We have an Arm's Reach co-sleeper, we swaddle, have a bedtime ritual that includes a bath, feed a big bottle of breast milk etc. to no avail. I have read Dr. Sears and Happiest Baby on the Block and No Cry Sleep Solution too. She used to wake up a lot but quietly. Now she is LOUD. My theory: babies are learning to sleep so they're not all good at it!!! I am exhausted too and feel a little crazy...Good luck & thanks for posting - I am reading all the suggestions eagerly!!

Hi B.! Congrats on your new baby! I myself have an almost 4 month old. Really the only thing that I found helps keep my
little one asleep after a feeding is using a heating pad to warm her crib up. I set the heating pad in the crib and turn it on. We nurse and burp and she falls asleep in my arms. I remove the heating pad and lay her down. If I don't use the heating pad she wakes up again. I guess when they go from warm arms to a cold mattress its a rude awakening.
good luck I hope this works for you too!

Hello B., Glad you are not willing to let him cry it out, a couple of things struck me, you said "I used to swaddle him, but he's insisted we stop that" wonder how he insisted. I know babies go through growth spurts and some nights are a lot harder then others and this too shall pass, but swaddling might seem something that at fist your baby doe not like, but it always works. Although I would swaddle a sleepy child vs one who is wide awake. So feed him on one breast, swaddle when he is milk drunk and then feed him again on second breast while swaddled. I also found that having the same 'ritual' every night before sleeping really helps. This is somethign to consider:
Feed
Bath/massage
Feed
swaddle read
sleep

Hope this helps
D. G.

Hi B.,

Do yourself a HUGE favor and get homeopathic sleep spray and or "silent nights" sleep patches by Lifewave. Safe for you and safe for baby!! Go to Lifewave.com/kherihealth for more info When my kids use this product they sleep all thru the night and wake up happy. Affordable too. Let me know if you have any questions.

K.

Hi B.,

Boy, do I feel your pain. My son is 6 1/2 months old and went through the same thing...still does from time to time. My son is a bigger baby, and there were a few things that worked along the way.

First, I wake him up to breastfeed before I go to bed myself. He doesn't actually wake up, just drinks. And, this fills him up a little bit and allows him to sleep a little longer. This eliminated one time he used to wake up. The other thing I've tried (which worked), and i'm not sure how you feel about this, is about every other time he wakes up in the middle of the night we get up and put a binky in his mouth. And, that does it for about 90-120 minutes. So, every other time I'm nursing, and the other times we're putting a binky in his mouth for the soothing factor. Both these tricks have helped my life tremendously, and allow me to get a bit more rest. I'm with you, in that I do not agree with the cry-it-out option at any age.

The only time these tricks don't work for me now, is when he's teething. On bad nights for that, there's nothign I can do but hold him and nurse him and comfort him as much as he needs. Those are nights I spend almost entirely in the rocker in his nursery.

Oh, and in regards to your comment about your baby waking up when you put him down...same thing used to happen with my son too. Basically he just didn't like to be put down on his back because he'd instantly wake up. so, I'd carefully put him in his crib in the same position he'd be in when nursing to sleep - and for us that's on his side on my breast-feeding pillow. If i slowely and carefully put him in the crib on his side, and then tucked him in tightly with his blanket that pretty much worked. if not, I'd have that binky ready to put in his mouth so that I didn't have to pick him up again. I did that for about 10 days, and now he doesn't have any problems with me putting him in his crib. That worked really nicely for me.

Good luck!

H B.:

Just throwing my two cents in here because I see you have some wonderful ideas here already: I LOVED co-sleeping with all 3 of my babies - whether it was with a co-sleeper (which I truly love and always recommend to people!) or just in my bed (before I dicovered the co-sleeper). Your baby nurses for other reasons than just for nutrition. You will not go wrong giving him what he needs. Before I had a child I always said my child would sleep through the night in his OWN crib in his OWN room. Once my children were born, I discevered how quickly time passes and I would not give up the nightime closeness that I had with each of them during those nursing seesions for ANYTHING in the world. Later on you can worry -if you're inclined to do so- about getting him to sleep on his own, for now enjoy these first few months with him and do what comes natural to millions of moms in the entire world - sleep with your baby. You will both sleep SO WELL! My husband got used to having a baby in our bed always (since I had a baby every 3 years and they each slept with us until they were 2 years old - do the math - there was ALWAYS a baby in our bed). Now my hubby and I look back at those precious times very fondly and proudly that we gave our babies what they needed and wanted during those early years. (If you're wondering if you will ever be able to get the child out of your bed - don't worry - you will. At age 2 each kid moved to a big boy/big girl bed without too much fuss!) God bless you for trying to do the best for your baby.

M.

I would recommend you try co-sleeping in a family bed.

I am a mother of four. My youngest is 2 1/2 months old, and my oldest is 10. I have never had a sleeping problem because my babies have always slept next to me in my bed.

If you think about it, we are the only mammal on the planet that attempts to put out babies "elsewhere" to sleep. When they sleep with you, you, and them, hardly wake up to nurse. Also, the problem with putting them down doesn't happen because you don't have to pick them up.

Some people worry that if they co-sleep, they will never get their children out of their bed. Don't worry, they will. My 3 and 22 month old sleep soundly in their own beds.

Good luck and happy resting!

You and your baby sound exactly how me & mine were when she was a baby. (the best baby in the world, but the worst sleeper!!) I am NOT a fan of the "cry-it-out" thing too because it just would wind her up and get worse, so I ended up just letting her sleep with me, nurse in bed and then we could both get sleep. I know it seems like forever, but before too long, he'll learn more and more and they change into new patterns so quickly. He's still so little. Keep trying new things every couple weeks because one of them is bound to hit the spot and work, but for now you gotta sleep!
M.

When I put my son to sleep, I play a 17-minute long song (kind of a New Age-type spa sounding thing) along with the white noise machine. By the time the song ends, he's asleep. After his middle-of-the-night feeding, I put him down and play the song again. (My MP3 player is hooked up to a speaker, so I just have to hit Play.)

I also give him a pacifier so he can suck to his heart's content as he drifts off.

Good luck!

This too shall pass! Our daughter never took naps and went to bed late and was up all night. When she was your son's age we tried the crying thing, but it went on too long increasing as it contined. She ended up sleeping with us first on top of one of us and then in between us. Once she was asleep we would attempt to put her in the bassinet next to our bed. Sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn't. She was one of those who needed to be held even during the day. Thank goodness for the packs they have! The only way to get her to nap at all was for me to hold her and sleep sitting up with her in my arms. Even then she wouldn't last any longer than 20 minutes. It was very difficult transferring her too. She would always wake up. AS she got older I would stay with her until she fell asleep and then creep out of her room praying all the way. Some sleep well and others don't. You could try having him in your bed until he is a little bit older. When my husband and I wanted to spend time together we would just change our venue to another part of the house. It all settled out in the end. She is now 12 and has been sleeping through the night all by herself for many years. When we started putting her in her own bed and then stopped staying with her until she fell asleep I thought that would be a struggle too, but it wasn't. She took to it readily. Good luck! PS - It's worth the time together as a family and it is very special. I like it when she comes in now if she has a nightmare. We miss having her to cuddle with.

Babies/newborns have no control over their limbs (yet)... and they have a 'startle reflex' and their limbs 'flail' at the slightest change in position. THUS, they wake. Their motor control is not yet, 'in control.'

He's so young... 'self-soothing' takes time and at the appropriate age. I would think that at 4 months old, it's a little young. My son, self-soothed at 6 months old...just naturally.

At this age too, it's a 'growth spurt' and they get hungry because their intake needs are increasing as they grow and develop.

Maybe instead of 'swaddling' him, try a sleep sack? it's still the same concept, but a little different.

I know it's not easy...but alas, this is the way it is with a baby. It's not easy for them either.... they are changing so much and so rapidly each week, each month. And their wakings reflect that and all their growing 'pains.'

Perhaps as well, he is "cluster feeding" which is common for babies... at certain periods, they will NEED to feed even every hour. This is normal though. I went through that with BOTH my kids, at different growth changes. But you do need to feed them on demand through it all. Perhaps... feed your son a lot in the few hours before bedtime. I think he is just needing more intake basically....that is why he is waking up so much. ALSO....make sure he is feeding enough during the day... not on a 'schedule' but on demand. A baby knows how much they need to feed...

All the best,
Susan

This is a tough time, I think most moms go though this. I know many moms who have used the Guardian Sleeper to help with this transition. The blanket is designed to swaddle baby around his chest but still give him movement in his arms and legs. You know how they love to kick. Check out www.guardiansleeper.com I really think this is going to help as your baby will feel like he is being held.
I know self soothing can be a challenge but it is completely worth it for a long term good sleeping routine.
Good luck
Austin's Mom

I would put an action plan together! It gets worse as they get older to put them down, as I have experienced with my 9 month old. As a loving mother, I would first recommend to check if baby is teething and that does help having mom there. I started practicing putting my son in his crib about 4 mo, he usually slept with us. To break him into his crib,what has worked for us, is feed right side, put him down in crib and soothe. He will cry, but you're not leaving him long. Leave the room only for a couple of minutes. Come back and feed off the left side, put him in the crib and soothe. He will cry. After a couple min. go in and pick him up, no nursing, and soothe to sleep. It usually takes 4 times. Continue with this until he knows that mom is here for me, but this is where she wants me to be. I don't like to have my son cry it out and this is not that! Anything after 3 days is considered routine. We now nurse on both sides and then go down. Depending on his mood he sometimes fights routine... now he's testing boundaries : )