Need Potty Training Advice for an 18 Month Old Girl

Updated on June 06, 2012
J.A. asks from Whiteland, IN
21 answers

She has been in cloth diapers since birth. I have always heard this would make for easier potty training. We have been trying for about a few months now. It's not an every single day sort of thing. But she does wear Gerber training pants. I felt they would be a better transition because they have just a tiny bit of absorbency. She has a potty chair and a ring for the big toilet. She'll sit down on either one, but has yet to pee or poop in either one. I'll sit her down, and she won't do anything. But then she runs into the other room and does her business either in the panties or on the floot. Ironically, I have already gotten her basically trained to do it on the linoleum floor because it is easier to clean up the mess. But I cannot get her to use the toilet. She seems to be ready and have a basic desire to do it. She enjoys going into the bathroom with me. I heard once that getting them to do it the very first time is the hardest. She also understands wiping and will use objects to wipe either side. Like today she pooped on the linoleum right after I had put her on the toilet and she tried to wipe herself with her brush. Bleh :-/ But I was proud of her for trying. Any suggestions on how to get her to do it on the toilet?

ETA: I am not pushing her. But she no longer wishes to wear diapers. Literally, she will throw a fit if you put one on her. What
then? Oh and I'm not asking if she's ready and I frankly don't need to hear bs about how I should 'read a book'. She's not my only child, and she's also not the first kid I've potty trained. I am following her lead. I'm only seeking advice on how to make her more comfortable with the process.

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

Thank you all for the advice. I haven't made a decision as to what to do, really. I think I will make her wear diapers at least a few days. But then I believe I may push a little. I believe she is ready. And I do not think that waiting is always the answer.

Featured Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.C.

answers from Orlando on

Can you put a potty seat on the linoleum floor where she likes to go? Try panties on and training pants OVER the panties. She feels wet and uncomfortable, mess is contained for you. When trying to poop train my son, if he messed his pants, I would make him clean it up. After two times doing that, he was trained. My Mom thought I was super mean to do that to him, but hey, it worked. Good Luck!

2 moms found this helpful

A.G.

answers from Mansfield on

Try setting a timer and putting her on the potty every 30 mins. or so. Once she's done her business a time or two, she'll probably want to use the potty. She may not go every time, but eventually she'll get know when the timer dings, it's time to use the potty. It took a few months of putting my daughter on the potty every 40 mins for her to get the concept. I still use the timer because she is still learning to tell us when she has to go. It's tiring, but so worth it!
Now, this may not work for eveyone but it worked for me. My mom used the same technique for me and my two brothers. Pullups were a joke and didn't work at all for my daughter. I let her run around in big girl panties. She still has "oops" but she's getting there. Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.G.

answers from Chicago on

This is what I would do: let her run naked for 15-30 minutes every morning, and try to get some catches. If you want her to sit on the toilet and she won't, let her watch utube videos on your phone or something if reading books doesn't work. When she gets a hit, do a happy dance and throw her in the air. Then call daddy and gramma and tell them. After she gets the muscle control, stop with serious praise, treat it as a natural part of the day, like eating.

if she is doing it immediately after bathroom time, she is understanding, but she doesn't have the muscle control. I read in some potty book that it takes 12-15 hits in the toilet for them to gain muscle control (i.e. ability to pee on command).

I'd put her back in diapers, save for naked time. When she is putting 90% of her pee in the potty, then move her into the trainers. 18 months is the perfect age to potty train! Good for you for recognizing that she is done with diapers, and in need of someone to teach her how to put her pee in the pot!

Just be patient,, give her lots of opportunities, and let her figure it out. It sometimes takes a month or so at this age, but she will get it. Also expect lots of regressions and set backs. And 2 year olds are really distracted! My trained son has taken to spraying his pants and not telling me because he is just "too busy" to be bothered by it.

2 moms found this helpful

R.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

~ Take her to the potty at the times you know she usually goes, like when she wakes, before and after meals, before and after naps, before and after baths, and before bedtime. Keep her there, don't let her jump up, by closing the bathroom door, reading to her, whatever it takes to keep her entertained so she learns to actually sit a bit. Have her sit when you are going and explain the process (yes, she's learning but you're going over what you are doing will reinforce it.) Do it at the same times each day so she gets into the routine, right now it's still a game to her.
~ Give her a book or books she looks at only when she's on the potty to help her relax and sit for longer spells.
~ Run her to the potty when you see she's going to run to another room to go in her pants, once she does it in the potty it will help her start to make the connection of doing it in the potty.
~ Start teaching her NOT to use the floor, as she may think it's OK to do so outside your home (I read something about a 6 year old doing this awhile back here on Mamapedia.)
~ Do at least a week or so of bare bottoms, so she can get to the potty easier. I used cloth trainers as well, but the bare-bottomed time helped to get the basics down, the pulling up of undies came later.
~ Be consistent in your efforts to train her, or be content for it to take some time if you continue to let her lead you, at 18 months she's the optimum age to train, per what I have read and observed in the many toddlers I have trained. My guy was ready at 19 months but I went against my gut and waited per our pediatrician's advice, and he then resisted and fought me and didn't train until he was 27 months, and it was a rough several months that resulted in him holding his poop :-/

Just make it less of a game to her, and a way of life. Oh, and duck tape the diapers, ending the tape in the back so she can't get them off, covering with overalls/shortalls on backwards so she'll keep her diaper on. We had to do that around the time my guy was her age...they want the diaper off but not to use the potty so you have to outsmart them ; )

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.D.

answers from Dallas on

I'm not qualified to provide advice on this because my two and a half year old is still in diapers.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Well, apparently she hasn't read the articles on the cloth diapers making it easier to potty train! LOL

Seriously, it's pretty clear that even though she's showing a bit of interest in bathroom behavior--she's obviously not ready.

Be patient!

ETA: Stock up on training pants! OR--cave & get some Pull ups!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

N.L.

answers from Chicago on

I'm sure I'm going to be called a child abuser and whatnot, but here's how it went down at our house. Our daughter was "ready" (in the sense that your daughter is ready), but she really did NOT want to sit on the potty (I think an earlier experience with the musical reward thingy freaked her out).

We started of with putting her on the ring on the "adult" toilet and dribbling a little water on her privates to "simulate" the feeling of her peeing. When she realized it didn't cause the end of the world, we took her off and loaded her up with drinks. When she was ready to pee, we eventually ended up just holding her on the potty (and yes she cried), but I held her hand and talked to her and then she realized nothing scary happened when she peed in the potty. Afterward we made a big deal about what a great job she did and what a big girl she was and she was good to go!

Not saying that you should do it this way, but it worked for us. I think it would have gone down this way, regardless of her age. She has to be "pushed" into trying new things (she's just like her M.!).

1 mom found this helpful

K.L.

answers from Cleveland on

Please understand that people are trying to help you, since you asked a question. If you are following your daughter's lead, fantastic! But you didn't make that clear in your first entry, so please don't get so irate when you update. This site is designed so we can HELP each other.

When my daughter finally was ready to potty train (at 3 and a half), I had the same issues. She no longer wanted to wear diapers or pullups, but was having a hard time with the potty. I finally just put her in underwear. Did we end up with LOTS of laundry and floor scrubbing for the next week or so? Yup. But it worked.

Good luck, and try not to be so stressed.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

E.T.

answers from Albuquerque on

Wait a few months and try again. It doesn't sound like she's ready to me. When she is, it will be like something just clicked and you won't struggle. We had the best success with our two girls when we stopped trying for two months and then reintroduced the potty. The break helped, I think. So, my advice is put her back in diapers. Keep talking about going to the bathroom, but don't push it. In two months, tell her that it's time and try it all over again.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.B.

answers from Fort Wayne on

I work in a daycare with young children and have had many experiences like that with some of my children in the classroom...if I think they are ready and need to go, i work on keeping them on the potty as long as possible...we talk about whatever we can think of, we are working on learning to spell and recognize our names(make it a song) they get so focused on sitting and chitchatting they forget and oops they went potty in the big toilet....then make sure you acknowledge what happened...this works well with my children that are ready, but dont like to sit...hope this helps

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.B.

answers from Boston on

Please, please read a book on child development. You are many months, if not years, away from this milestone. My kids were cloth-diapered and all potty trained between 2.5 and 3.5 years. Stop, just stop trying to get her to do this.

Here is a link to some signs of readiness. Honestly, if you start before she's developmentally ready, you're in for a much longer road than if you just chilled out and let her take the lead.

http://life.familyeducation.com/potty-training/toddler/61...

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.F.

answers from Columbus on

I would pour a little water between her legs when she sits...it helped my girl and they just need to get that feeling. Have her drink a bunch before trying this....good luck - and GOOD FOR YOU for cloth diapreing!!!!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.R.

answers from South Bend on

Get her on the potty IMMEDIATELY after her eyes open in the morning or after a nap and do not let her off until she does the deed. That will get her to pee in potty for sure. My then 20 month old daughter was trained in 2 weeks. But my 25 month old twins are giving me LOTS of trouble, even though they have both peed and pooped in the potty numerous times. They are totally inconsistent. My older daughter spoiled me because she was so easy! Good Luck!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B..

answers from Dallas on

She doesn't sound completely ready. Just keep trying casually, be patient, and don't make it a battle. She will eventually get it.

We cloth diaper, and we are struggling mightily to get my 3 year old potty trained. Cloth might make it easier for some, but that doesn't mean all kids will easily learn early.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.B.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Every child is different and I can tell you that my daughter who also happens to be the youngest of two, wore regular disposable diapers trained herself at 18 months. She showed an interest and I just let her go. She still had diapers on but would rip them off to go on her potty and the diaper would still be dry.

So while others may say she is too young, she is not. On the other hand, dont make a big deal out of it and let her have her way. Rule of thumb, and I find this very true since I have helped train many children around the age of two ( was a daycare teacher for two year olds for 4 years) if they are ready it will only take 2-3 days. Keep her in the training pants if you are comfortable with doing so and keep the bathroom door open so she can go when she is ready.

Good Luck!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.T.

answers from Dallas on

I know its not what you want to hear, but she's clearly not ready - wait awhile, potty training shouldn't be a months long process.

ETA: read your ETA and SWH: doesn't change my answer... i've potty trained a lot of kids as well. you say she throws a fit if you put a diaper on her, so what then? you are the parent, she is the child, she must be kept clean, if you seriously can't figure out how to keep a diaper on an 18 month old, you've got a LOT of larger battles coming your way... not wanting to wear a diaper is only one of MANY steps of potty readiness. they also have to understand sitting on the potty, getting to the potty BEFORE going, etc. etc. "waiting until they're ready" doesn't mean you wait until they literally potty train themselves, but that you give it a try every couple months, if you're not even close at the end of a day of trying, they're not ready. potty training should NEVER take more than a day, two tops - at that point, it's nothing but aggravation for parent AND child. good luck, i'm sure she'll get it soon, but take a chill pill :) people are only trying to help.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.G.

answers from Champaign on

I don't know, I only have boys. My oldest was just 2 months shy of his 4th birthday when he trained (in 3 days). My youngest is 3, and I think we'll be tackling this soon.

Seriously, if she were ready, she'd have trained by now.

M.J.

answers from Milwaukee on

Actually your question was "Any suggestions on how to get her to do it on the toilet?" and the answers were mostly to wait a few months. I really did not see anyone ridicule you, so it may be your own issue.

You could try giving her tons to drink even root beer if she will not drink water or juice and keep putting her on the potty. If you do this all day you may just catch her at the right time and she will pee on the potty. Then throw her a mini "pee on the potty party" :)

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.L.

answers from Washington DC on

I understand how you think she is ready because of the signs she is showing. But my personal opinion is - when a kid is truly ready then she will potty train in a day or two. Seriously. I know this isn't the first kid you've potty trained, and I don't know how well it went with the others. But when I hear stories like this I can only go on my own personal experience - and both of my girls were potty trained in a couple of days because they were COMPLETELY ready. One was 2 year, 8 months and the other was almost exactly 3 years old.

Of course, her not wanting to wear a diaper creates a problem!! I mean, if she won't go in the potty yet she won't wear a diaper?! That sort of sucks for you. I wish I had some advice. I think she's probably too little to listen to reason ("if you can't go in the potty then you have to wear a diaper.") I had a friend who used to duct tape her son's diaper on him b/c he kept taking it off and making a complete mess everywhere (he was also 18 months)

She's OK with training pants though? Pull-ups? I know they're more expensive but maybe for another 6 months or so it would be worth not having her wipe herself with a brush (that made me chuckle by the way!) Good luck to you :)

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.S.

answers from Columbia on

Age her another 6 to 18 months.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.W.

answers from Syracuse on

My honest opinion here is that she's awfully young, she's still 6 months away from turning 2.

I think just having the potty and ring for her to practice sitting on is a great start. The fact that she's showing interest and likes to sit on it is good too. What I did to get my kids to start going in the potty, was hang a sticker chart on the wall beside the toilet. After they would go, they could choose a sticker to put on their chart. You can find and print them online for free.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions