Need Help Putting Baby to Sleep and Looking for a Playgroup

Updated on April 04, 2008
Y.G. asks from Cypress, TX
19 answers

Hello, I have a 7 week old baby girl. I have been having a hard time putting her to sleep. She cries if you put her in her crib and won't stop until you pick her up. Her Pediatrician suggests I let her cry, but she can cry for more than an hour before she falls asleep. I have also heard that is not good to let her cry because it affects her emotionally and can give her problems when she grows up.

My husband and I just recently moved to Houston and we have no family close by. My husband works a lot and I don't know anyone in the area. I live in Cypress and would like to meet other moms with babies around the age of mine. I will love to join a play group, please if you know of one around the cypress area can you let me know.

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So What Happened?

Thank you all for your responses. I am going today to go by the books that were recommended as well as some cds. As for the playgroup, I will start looking at all the ones that were recommended and hopefully join one soon. I will let you know how things are in a week or so, hopefully by them my baby has learned a better sleeping pattern.

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D.E.

answers from Houston on

I had a similar problem. I had a friend tell me to get the book Baby Wise. I read it in 2 days and started the pattern and let me tell you it worked! My daughter did the same thing when she was 7 wks. old and I was exhausted and clueless how to help her but everything changed after I read that book. Try it and you will have an understanding of the ways of baby life!

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A.W.

answers from Houston on

You may have tried this... music? You can pick up these baby lullabies cds for like 10$ in stores like Wal-Mart/Target, etc. in the baby section. I started using them when mine was about 8 weeks to get her settled... it actually has helped my husband and me relax when we go to bed too!

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C.N.

answers from Houston on

My husband and I also live here in Houston (in the Cypress area) without any family close by. I am a member of Moms in Motion. I don't know what I'd do without this fantastic group of mommies, and there's always a playdate or event planned to keep us busy during the week. The group caters to mothers of children ages birth-5. To find out more, email ____@____.com.

A.R.

answers from Houston on

International MOMS Club
We are a support group designed just for you, the at-home mother of today! ... International MOMS Club Inquiries. Click on the globe for our International MOMS ...

www.momsclub.com

~playgroups and support that you need!

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C.T.

answers from Houston on

Go get the book BabyWise. I just had my first in January. I have stuck to what the book says about letting them cry and everything. It works. Now, in order, for it to work you need to read the whole book. Do not just browse it or you will miss some very important parts. For instance, they say it takes a baby 3 days to change their schedule and it is normal for a baby in the first day to cry over an hour. Also, they say that studies show that letting a baby cry does not affect them emotionally and will not give them problems later on. I refer to this book on a weekly basis. I just purchased BabyWise II for 5 months to 18 months.

It has been hard work emotionally but trust me it is worth it. My little one has been sleeping through the night since she was 8 weeks. She is now 12 weeks and I can put her down wide awake at her scheduled time and within 15 minutes she is asleep without any help.

Also, I do swaddle her with a blanket called the Miracle Blanket. I have also used the Swaddle Me blanket from Target.

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L.H.

answers from Houston on

We had the same issues with our son, who is now 17 months old and sleeps wonderfully! We finally did some sleep training when he was 5 months old.

Read the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth. It gives you guidelines on how to let your baby cry it out. Your baby may be a little young to let her cry it out, but this book will give you some ideas. Good luck!

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M.W.

answers from Houston on

Hi Y..

This is my advice to you: listen to you own gut.

You will hear many people giving you gratuitous advice, but YOU are the mommy of that precious child. if you want to pick her up to calm her or for her to fall asleep, please, please do and don't feel guilty about it.

This society is so bent-up on having our babies act like adults, it's insane. Remember, your baby has been in your womb longer than she's been out. she's still getting used to this world, and at 7 weeks, she shouldn't be expected to sleep like a 30 year old.

I always 'listened' to what my baby needed and even came to the point of bringing her to our bed to sleep. I can't tell you how many people told me I was damaging my child and turning her into a misfit. It worked out fine: she's not a spoiled brat, she's not twitching because of it. She's a sweet, caring little girl who now sleeps in her own bed at 18 months, and likes it!

You're doing great, and your being a great mom to your baby. Keep up the good work. The best way to care for your baby is to 'listen' to her and her needs. No guilt!

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B.S.

answers from Houston on

I had the hardest time letting my boys cry it out, but it was the best thing that I did for myself. They won't grow up to hate you because of it. I know that is not really easy to hear when you are listening to that little person cry and know in your mind you are supposed to me the one to take care of them and make it all better, but it really is what is best for them. If you don't let them cry they will will never learn how to calm down by themselves. It really is for the best.

As for clubs. I love the MOMs Club. I am in one branch in Katy, and for a local branch you can email momsclub.org. They will find the club that is in your area. Another option is looking in your community newsletter. They have some local groups listed too.

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P.H.

answers from Houston on

Hi Y..

We have a 4 month old daughter and she did not go to her crib until she was three months, unless it was just to play and look at her Mobile. Instead we had a Bassinet right beside our bed, that way when she did fuss I could just reach over and pat her back or rock the bassinet until she drifted off. Also, I would not put her down until she was dozing off after her last evening bottle.

I don't think we are too terribly far from Cypress, but me and two other women have started a play group in the Woodlands. So far we meet once a week for lunch. Please let me know if you'd like to join us!

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D.S.

answers from Houston on

Hi! I am the mother of 6 (yes I said 6) children. So I have pretty much encountered every problem there is with children. My experience tells me that a 7 week old baby cries because it is insecure. If holding it stops the crying, I say "hold her". In a few weeks of developing better ways to sooth herself, she will sleep better. And, if she feels confident that her world is safe and secure......she will begin to develop those skills soon. However, I don't believe in each time she makes a tiny sound to run pick her up, but......... sooth her when she cannot sooth herself. Also, try to soothing music and not a real quiet environment. I think we try to make things TOO perfect for them. They were used to a very noisey place while still inside the womb. So rythmic sounds tend to help them feel safe. I hope this helps. I have never seen a child that was "loved TOO much".

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A.O.

answers from Houston on

Hi Y. - First, I should say that I am not against letting a little one "cry-it-out". However, for me it was too early to start using that method when my son was 7 weeks. Instead I tried to start a routine with him. Every night he had a bath and then we had some quiet cuddle time in his bedroom. Usually I would play music, feed him and then when he was done swaddle him, turn out the lights and cuddle him a little. When he was really sleepy, I put him in his bed. Usually he would then drift off to sleep. Sometimes though, I would hold him until he was actually asleep. We did this until he was about three months old. Everyday the same but as he got older, I didn't let him fall asleep in my arms. Rather I let him get sleepy there and then put him in his bed. Then if he started to cry in protest I simply gave him a kiss and said "sleepy time" and closed the door. I let him cry it out and he would cry for 20-30 minutes at the most but usually much shorter once he figured out that I meant business. It wasn't long before our protests were down to about 2 or 3 minutes and not long after that, they stopped as soon as we closed his door. I think routine is the key. My little one is 18 months now and I still give him a bath, massage, read books, and leave him with some music.

Hope that helps.

A.

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K.M.

answers from Houston on

Y.,
I live in Cypress, we would love for you to join our play group. If you go to meetup.com we are call the cypress Haute tots. we have an awesome group. E-mail Stephaine and we can set something up. Where did you move from? My husband and I are new to Houston as well. We have been here for a year now. I love it. Where do you live. Maybe we can meet sometime. I have a 2 year old, she loves babies! you can e-mail if you have any questions ____@____.com to you soon!

K.

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T.H.

answers from Houston on

Hi, i'm experiencing the same thing with my 3 month old, well he'll be 3 months on the 10th. plus he sleeps with us at night because he won't go down in his crib without crying and he will cry and cry so he sleeps with us and he sleeps good! Anyway it seems we have a lot in common with our children and i want him to have more interaction with children his age. I'm a stay at home mom just recently and love being with my son. we live in the tomball area so if you want to talk..... T.

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A.T.

answers from Houston on

Hi there,
I agree with your pediatrician, you have to let her cry and she will eventually fall asleep. If I were you turn the radio on that way the crying will not be to unbearable for you and secondly spray a drop of your perfume in her crib that way she will scent your odor and it will soothe her. Try it and let her cry until she falls asleep otherwise you will still have this problem down the road and it will get worse. Good luck and let us know how things go

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C.G.

answers from Houston on

I would highly recommend the book "Baby Wise" and as another person recommended "the happiest kid on the block" book. The main principles are to swaddle your baby, hold and rock them gently, offer a pacifier for comfort, make soft "shushing" sounds. I am a mother of twins and believe me, we needed a tried and true way of getting our babies to sleep and this was it. Swaddling is the key in my opinion. And make sure your baby has eaten. Personally, I would not let a 7 week old baby cry for an hour - that is too long. Check to make sure she is fed, has a dry diaper, then follow the steps I mentioned, and when she is almost asleep, lay her down. We were also taught that it is better to let your baby fall asleep on their own. This will pay off as she gets older and wakes during the night, and hopefully put herself back to sleep. I hope this helps!! Feel free to email me if you have any questions!

C.

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N.H.

answers from Houston on

Y.,

I know it is so hard to hear your baby cry, especially when you know you can make it stop. Trust me though, it's ok to let her cry. She needs to figure out how to calm herself. My youngest child was the same way. It took a few days but after that he went down like a charm. It wasn't easy though!

Might I recommend you looking up an organization called MOMs Club. It is a support group for stay at home moms. When my kiddos where little this was my saving grace plus I met some of my very bestest friends ever! I know there is a Cypress Mom's club. I was part of the group when it was origianlly founded. I have since lost touch since my kids are older but hopefully you can find them on line.

Best of luck.

N.

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Z.L.

answers from Houston on

Hi Y.,
Your daughter is blessed to have you as her mother. I tend to agree that it is not good to let babies cry for long periods. Many cultures carry babies constantly in slings on the back or front of the body. She is only seven weeks old. This world is very new to her. Before this she knew only a warm comfy place with a heartbeat in the background. Hey, perhaps you could try a CD of a heartbeat to soothe her.
Anyway, children choose their parents for a reason. You are the perfect parent for your daughter. Trust your feelings about what to do.

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B.N.

answers from Houston on

At 7 weeks it is hard to get a routine down, but maybe you are missing the sleepy cues. The sign of the first yawn or looking way from you means "time out I'm tired now". I wouldn't let her cry though. I tried picking up and settling down many times until asleep. This way they know you are there but you aren't necessarily letting her fall asleep in your arms. It may take a while, but once they get it, it is easy.
Also, I know of a great group in the Northwest Cypress area. Moms in Motion. Very organized and great women. I work, but my nanny did all sorts of stuff with them.

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H.P.

answers from Houston on

Have you tried to swadling? We ended up having to buy the "happiest baby on the block" dvd and book. We had lots of problems with our baby waking up after we put her down to sleep. Swadling helped because it restrained her from making random movements and waking herself up. also it soothes a little bit like the womb did. I know every baby is different so you might have to try everything everyone tells you in order to find the one thing that actually works for your baby. I did, and swadling worked some. What really ended up being the answer for us was TIME lol, my baby was VERY colicky though so im sure you won't have to rely on time. Maybe she needs comfort, like sucking on a paci or something? As for playgroups, I am in Katy and am currently looking for a playgroup for my 8 month old too.

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