Need Help on Discipline

Everyone in my family has a mood disorder, and I myself am manic-depressive. I can remember the way I acted and how I thought as a child, so I might be able to give you some suggestions or insight. My email address is ____@____.com's sort of hard to give general advice since things change from moment to moment... I would often act out the same way but feel different things (unloved, that I didn't get enough attention, that I wanted others to feel bad, that I felt crazy, etc.), so it's hard to point out just one thing that would help. If you could give me an example, I might be able to help.

i am bipolar also. is your son on any medication for this? if so it may not be the right one. it took a long time for my doctor to get me on the right ones. and not having the right meds can make it worse. i would talk to his doctor about this. and if you dont completely agree with the doc i would go to another one. and what kind of dr is treating him for this? it is very important to have a specialist in this field treat him. you can e mail me to let me know more if you would like. i would also like to talk wiyh you about your bipolar and nerves. i have alot of problems with this also. my e mail is ____@____.com good luck. hope to hear from you.

What discapline options have you used with your child. In my opinion, so take it how you will, ever child (behavior issues or not) need to be disciplined differently. SOmetimes the punishment should fit the crime but also some punishments work and some do not. I was best punished by discussing what I did, how it hurt others(whether it was my mom for not following the rules or whatever), and how I could have handled it differently. Even when I was 5 I had to know why I couldnt do something or no matter what my parents said I didnt care. Also now my husband who does have ADHD including while he was growing up and the only discipline that would work for him was spankings. If you talked to him he would and still does tone you out. Guilt trips never worked nor did time outs or taking things away. So every child is different. Try different discipline methods. I dont know what methods you are using but try spanking if your not against it, or pick up a book on behavior management. These books have great options on behavior management. You need to design one specifically towards your child. If its not working then this is not a good discipline method for your child. These are great options for children without disabilities as well as disabilities. These methods are usually used for children with behavior issues.

Try getting group therapy to help you cope with your children. An outsider can sometimes see things you don't.

D.

You know, if you are bi-polar...think back to when you were his age. What worked for you? My husband is bi-polar. It took years for the DR.s to get it right! I knew, but they all just kept giving him whatever to shut him up. It takes alot to diagnos. are you sure he has seen the right DR.s and is on the right meds?

Watch his sugar intake and Bipolar (I read from one person on this site---takes years to know you have and it is very rare in children) Dr's look for the easy way out always. Be strict and it will take many, many times for him to know you mean business.....please make sure he has proper nutrition and plenty of sleep. There is a book called Love and Logic that my daughter used and it changed a lot of things in their life, but she finally got through to my grandson. Blessings

Reading Dr. Raymond Moore's book - Home Built Discipline - will be a great tool to help you to learn to warmly, lovingly be in control. Children scream inside for control because there is comfort in boundaries (that they always butt against, I know)...but they feel more loved and secure inside those boundaries; they are not mature enough to do it on their own.

I suggest that book so much, you would think I get a residual income from it or something - I don't at all. It is just an encouraging tool I like to share.

Have you tried sitting him on your lap with his hands crossed in front of him? I know this sounds silly, but older children really hate this, and when I was baby sitting for a boy with serious behavioral problems that is what I did. My boy had been kicked out of several day cares because they couldn't get him to calm down. All I had to do was take three min's to sit with him, hug him tight, and talk gently to him, and that was all he needed to calm him self down. Now that is not to mention that he was 8 yrs old, so at first he would be mad because he was embarrassed that he was being treated like a little child, and I would tell him when you are ready to act like a big boy I will treat you like one, but until then you will sit here and enjoy my company. I know it sounds silly but it really worked! It may seem like you don't have enough time to do it, but you probably spend more time now dealing with the situation as is.

S.,

I am with you! My son is not bipolar, but does think I am joking when I discipline. I Have really buckled down recently, and gotten more into a routine. I am consistent with his punishment. Instead of telling him "you will go to time out if you act this way" I tell him now "If Mom doesn't have to tell you to clean your room more than once, we get an ice cream." You get the point. Whatever works best for him. Mine happens to love ice cream. This seems to really be helping. Good Luck!

I have some experience with bi-polar. My nephew whom I keep all summer and after school is bi-polar and ADHD. The best method to his lashing out is to always let him speak first. If he thinks you are listening completely to him it is easier for him to listen to you. He knows then that he has you attention and while you are listening we have found that at the same time you have got his attention too. Then ask him what would make it better, what can you do to fix it. Then agree you'll help him but in return he has to listen and help you. I know some parents wouldnt agree but if you have a bi-polar child you will see it is so much easier to make them feel as if it is goin their way. In all reality its actually helping you both. Good luck, I know its hard. Dont give up

I am not sure how to handle this situation, but I am in the same boat as you and for some reason they will not diagnose my daughter properly. She is Bi Polar, just like I am, but they will only diagnose her with ADHD, which the medications do not work for her at all. Could you please tell me how you got them to diagnose your son with Bipolar?
I do feel for you, as I have bi polar as well and my daughter seems to think that no matter what anyone does or says it is a joke. As a matter of fact she has spent 4 weeks pent up in her room without any play time just because she refuses to clean her room.
I took her out of therapy because it does no good at all.
I would also like the same help or information from anyone who has actually handled the same situation.

I have a couple of questions, how was it determined that your son is Bi-Polar? Because from experience and studies, it is said that the disorder is not hereditary. Also, I thought bipolar really didn't effect kids or I mean young adult until they go through there hormonal transitions, usually puberty or a little after, maybe around the middle of high school junior years for most people!? Just wondering because some doctor's have a way of lying or manipulating people in believing and thinking what they want them to think. Plus the boy is seven years old, they just are still in the stage of disciplining, until the age of maturity. I thought it was normal for kids up to about 11-13 years old to still not listen and do the same things you tell them not to do over and over again. Well I hope some of this information is helpful and praying that you have a blessed and precious day with your kids. God Bless you with all of my heart.