Need Breastfeeding Help

Keep trying and keep working with him. I've had this problem off and on for all 5 of my kids. I found that persistence and practice made all the difference in the world. Maybe a lactation consultant can help him latch on correctly without the shield. Keep up the good work. This precious time goes way too fast!

Hi Laura, I saw your question on our site, even though I am in Texas. I am a lactation consultant, and I see moms all the time with the same issue- baby is falling asleep on the breast. The primary reason for that is that he is not getting enough milk when he nurses, so he falls asleep. If he is falling asleep on the breast, and you are not still pumping, you are at a high risk of a decreasing milk supply. It happens slowly, and before you know it the milk is gone. Using a shield can be good for some babies who are not able to latch, but for others, it may cause them to get less from the breast. It also needs to be the correct size for your nipple, and the babies mouth. (they come in several sizes) Since it is Christmas Eve, of course, you will not be able to see a breastfeeding consultant until after the weekend, but if you really want breastfeeding to succeed, please make an appointment with one. They can weigh your baby before and after the feeding to see exactly how much he is taking at the breast. And then help you form a plan based on the results. Until then, you might want to start pumping and feeding expressed breast milk every other feeding, just to make sure he is getting enough. Look on the ILCA website (www.ilca.org) for a certified lactation consultant in your area. Good luck and don't give up, it is worth it to give your baby the best nutritional start possible!

I had this issue with my last, found out she was not getting enough food with the shild...not your fault. She lost a lot of weight and was fatiguing...didn't notice it right away. Anyhow had to pump for a few more weeks till she got her energy up and went for it again. I would take her in and get her weight see how she is doing. Baby's who are sick or not getting enough food are over tired and hard to keep awake. He needs to be seen.

My daughter is also three weeks old and we have the same problem! Here's what I have started doing and it seems to work. I feed only on demand (of course making sure that she's not going more than five hours without eating) and I wait until she is fully awake to start feeding. To be perfectly clear, I don't start feeding her the minute she starts making the sucking face and is just beginning to wake up....I wait until she is fully awake and crying to be fed. I know it sounds a little harsh and is not what is generally recommended, but it's what I found works. She now latches on right away, stays awake through eating on both sides and is actually a much more content newborn. She sleeps better and I've actually started to notice that it's helping with her acid reflux (no clue why, but she seems to spit up less after a good feeding than after the 10min partial sleep feedings).

Hope you find a solution that works for you!

Merry Christmas!

A.

You should have access to a lactation consultant either through the hospital where you gave birth or through your obstetrician's office.
The lactation consultant can observe how baby is latching with and without the shield and will advise you on how to make it easier for yourself and for baby. Also, you might like to call or look at La Leche League on the web. They can probably offer good advice and support.
Meanwhile, have you tried various positions . . . i.e.,
the angle of baby toward the breast?
There may be some approaches that work better than others.
Good luck and Joyful [your choice of holiday here].

Wow, sounds just like me and my son. It will get better! Try every few days to nurse without the shield and eventually he will not need it any longer. I think with my daughter I used one for at least 6 months, but with my son, I want to say he only needed it a month or two. I also pumped at least once or twice a day and gave him a bottle b/c that was quicker than nursing. Otherwise I would feed him 45min to an hour just to start back over again at the two hour mark. Maybe try to get on a schedule where you feed him when he wakes up from his naps. Best advice I have though is to be patient. This phase will pass before you know it!

not sure about latching, but try feeding him RIGHT WHEN he wakes up, as opposed to when he's about to go to bed. My friend does that and her little guy is done eating in about 20 minutes TOPS.

I really think you should google your local Le Leche League group! It's free to go and they have SO much support, information, experience and support there for you!

The first month or two... the baby will fall asleep during nursing often - the process of nursing releases hormones that comfort both of you and make you both sleepy. I'd try changing positions often, and as for suckling without the shield... do what is loosely called a nipple sandwich. You compress your nipple between two fingers to make it easier to get deeper into the infant's mouth. It will take a few tries before it becomes successful, so don't feel frustrated or impatient.

Good Luck - you'll do just fine!

I went through several growth spurts where it seems like you're feeding forever and nothing else:) Perhaps constant stimulation when nursing, so he doesn't get a chance to lull to sleep -- pinch his toes or soles of feet every minute or so, keep lights on and sound going, nurse without rocking or while standing, or keep him sitting up, put fan on him or other stimulation from start to finish?

For shield, I can only recommend trying without it each and every time -- you can always put him down and put it on again should he not latch or is too mad to nurse. You describe as if he's getting the hang of things now, his mouth is maturing and screaming sure works up to no sleeping:)

This behavior will change very quickly, maybe a week or so more and he'll get more alert and then there will be other changes to adapt to:)

I have been SO lucky to have two great nursers, but it frequently is not easy.
Check out babycenter.com and their breastfeeding support boards.I will try to post links, but they may not work since I am a member.

These ladies are amazing; their knowledge and support; check them out.
http://community.babycenter.com/groups/a25215/breastfeedi...

Hi Laura. Just wanted to offer you some more support. I used a shield with my first for about 8 weeks and just kept trying daily to go without it until it finally worked. I used these plastic breast thingies that were supposed to help my nipples protrude more for breastfeeding, sorry i forget their real name. That's round when she finally latched. My second little girl latched right on but she ate like your is.....all THE TIME!!!! It's hard to keep them awake. I would feed for a little, use a cold cloth, get up and change their diaper, tickle and talk to them.....it's HARD work no doubt but absolutely worth it. You won't regret this time with your baby. Breatmilk is best for your baby. But hey take it one day at a time. You can always switch to formula if you just can't do it. But give it some time and it will get better. My second would eat every 1.5 - 2 hours but after i went back to work she wasn't so demanding for a bottle and i realized it was about comfort as much as being hungry. You are doing a great job!! Just keep telling yourself ...it's not forever, it's just for now! Good luck ; )

Sorry for the late response. I just wanted to offer support. My first child was a poor latcher. I used a shield off and on to protect my sore nipples. I would suggest having a lactation consultant come over and watch your baby latch on and offer some support. You can find one through your local La Leche League (just look on-line). Your baby will not eat every two hours forever. I know it seems so hard, but it is so beneficial. I suggest finding a really cozy chair or sofa and watch tv. He will get better at latching on. He will not eat like this forever. It will get better! You are doing great! Hang in there.

My baby was the same way (wanting to nurse constantly!) and it was so frustrating. They grow out of it though. I think it's just really comforting to them. Keep trying! Good luck.

My daughter would nod off when she was tiny too. Try stroking his cheek when he gets lazy.

Try getting your milk going by using your hand then pop your unshielded nipple in his mouth. That way the milk is flowing and he knows why a different nipple is in his mouth instead of the shield. That's one of the problems with the shield is they get used to the feel of that

Hi Laura:

I wish I had found your question sooner. It seems we have two children who are a lot alike with regards to nursing; however, it will get better - I promise. My daughter is 13 years old, soon to turn 14 years old in about 9 days.

It isn't difficult for me to remember those first few weeks of engorgement to the point where I had to contact La Leche League to get help with the engorgement, which was as simple as running a hot to very warm bath and as soon as my milk let down, which was immediately given the hot/warm-warm water, my milk was down to a point where by the time the water cooled enough to be safe for the baby, my husband could bring her to me & she would gorge herself on milk from both breasts.

Actually, before that cycle was overted yet it wasn't as bad since the problems I had were relating to my breasts being over-filled with breast milk and not allowing her to latch on because of the oversized breasts, she was on that every hour on the hour feeding schedule. I thought I'd go mad! A wonderful woman and mother who nursed and was a counselor at La Leche League explained that it was normal and she let me know that the baby was reacting to my reservations and fears; it was sort of a transference if you will. It's sort of how babies cry when their first-time daddies hold them because they can sense the utter fear the fathers feel, you know, the one feeling where they are so afraid to hold their own child out of fear of breaking him or her because the child is so tiny compared to anything they are used to not to mention it's their child too and the last thing they want is to do something wrong. Mothers share this fear but for us, I honestly do believe there is a maternal instinct that kicks in, sooner rather than later for some or later rather than sooner for others but in the end, we all do the same thing: we muddle through until we find what works. What you are doing now with breast feeding is the greatest gift you can give your baby. I should know.

You see, I wasn't able to breast feed my oldest daughter; there was something wrong with my milk so we had no choice but to opt for formula even as much as I hated not having that instant bond, that instant connection that would continue even outside the uterus where I could hold her skin to skin to give her nutrients that would keep her healthy. Well, she wasn't a healthy baby. She was sick constantly. If it wasn't colds, it was strep, if it wasn't strep, it was ear infections. If it wasn't ear infections, it was sinus infections. There was always some illness kicking her butt and then there was me kicking myself for feeling like a failure even though I had no control over the problems with my milk. It didn't help that she was born w/ severely crossed eyes requiring surgical correction at 7mos or that she didn't crawl or even roll over until after the surgery. Her gross and fine motor skills were so low and sluggish we had to have specialists brought in to help bring her back up to where she should have been yet wasn't. That wasn't the only problem. It was a high-risk pregnancy with toxemia and pre-eclampsia not to mention being on bed-rest (in the bed with rest not just lounging and going about doing a bit of housework; it was Bed-Rest) by the 1st trimester. I nearly lost her numerous times throughout the pregnancy but during labor and delivery, the doctors found she had a heart condition too. My own heart was reading odd on the EKG machine. They had to attack a wire to my oldest's head while she was in the birth canal because it was such a long labor even with induction and no pain medication (Lamaze classes paid off) but in the end, she went into distress and they found the heart problem though she was older before they were able to nail down exactly what was happening. It turned out to be paroxsymal atrial tachycardia with an irregular heart beat. She takes medication for, which controls the racing heart beats, the severe fatigue, and the extremely low heart rate; the medicine also helps with other parts of her heart but primarily, it has allowed her to live as close to a normal life as possible. The one downside is that she was allergic to penicillin as a baby so they had to always put her on Bactrim each time she had an infection. Bactrim is damaging to the permanent teeth of children. It's something the pediatricians rarely if ever tell parents. All I ever wanted was a healthy child but with our oldest, it seems I spent more time in doctors & specialists offices or in and out of the hospital or the emergency room. Then she had ADD too.

Now with my 2nd & last child before I was diagnosed with lupus (SLE) and Sjogren's disease and had to go on a lot of different medications, which prevented me from safely getting pregnant or having another child b/c it meant I'd have to come off the medications completely and there was still no guarantees I could get pregnant. After all, I'd been told by numerous doctors from the time I was in the 5th grade that I had only 2 chances of having children of my own when I was grown; the chances were "slim" and "none." I was told that even if I managed to get pregnant, which was highly unlikely, it was even more unlikely I'd ever carry a child to term. So, my girls, despite being 10 years apart in age, were such a blessing. It is why I wanted to do the best I could by them.

By the time our 2nd child was born, my milk was tested and it was okay to nurse her. We had it a bit rough at first but I soon learned that the secret is really simple. Buy up breast-feeding clothing with the little openings or large shirts you can easily lift while home and nursing bras are a major YES!

It is highly important to ensure the baby gets all of the areola into their mouths. It's the brown area around your nipple. You are likely thinking this is impossible but honestly, it's not. It just takes practice. It's difficult when the baby has reached a point where he/she is so hungry they are screaming, hence having your clothes at the ready to make the transition from woman to nursing mother as quickly as possible. The sooner you are ready, the sooner you are able to get the baby to latch on properly, the easier the time will be for both of you.

It helps tremendously if you relax while nursing. There is a chemical that's in the hypoglamus part of the brain that releases endorphines in the mothers' system. It floods the body and can create a feeling of tranquility that can't be manufactured or bottled and it is a shame. I got the best sleep when my daughter was nursing. In fact, it got to the point where I had to position us both in such a way so that if I dozed off, which was frequent until she stopped taking milk, I would wake from the doze state feeling actually refreshed and not so tired; however, it did mean foregoing a lot of housework until her feeding schedules were longer than every hour on the hour and that lasted a couple of months or so. My peditrician assured me that she was gaining the right amount of weight, the right nutrients, and was healthy as a horse. She was also a much smaller baby than my oldest but it come from the fact she was breast-fed. Formula has a lot of filler & fats, which is why many formula fed babies are obese. It's like eating a salad yet 10 minutes later they are gulping down another 8 to 12 oz of formula and if you try to withhold formula to avoid or to control the heavy weight, they become even more heavy. It's part of why my oldest was started out on a vegetarian diet even on baby food, which most of which was made with organic foods I blended myself either in the blender or in the food processor depending on how old she was and if she was ready for table food.

If you have friends and family close, ask if they can help pitch in with the housework. Get your husband involved in the housework as well. You have a big enough job just keeping the baby fed. The last thing you want to fight at this stage is nipple confusion. It could literally blow your chances of that one-on-one contact that helps you and your baby bond. Skin on skin is actually best. I found my youngest was nowhere near as cranky if I simply slipped out of my shirt & bra then held her so she could nurse skin on skin. she wasn't as cranky, slept better, digested better, little to no colic (making sure mommy stayed away from spicey foods of course)

You are still very early in your nursing stage. Most mothers are only just now at 3-weeks getting into a breast-feeding groover with their babies.

Don't beat yourself up if your baby goes to sleep while nursing. It's normal. Just be sure to burp them, even when breast feeding, then mark your breast side by using a large safety pin so you know to start on the opposite breast at the next feeding. In time, you will find that the baby will empty one breast then move to the next one and they will usually conk out about halfway through nursing on the opposite side. Mark the side they started on, not the side they ended, for the next feeding schedule.

It's also important to keep yourself as calm and collected as well as stress free when you are nursing and generally taking care of your baby at this time. Your baby will be getting his cues from you. They somehow pick up on your emotions and inhibitions and fears. Calm yourself to keep your baby calm and it should help tremendously as well as planning ahead.

You can always nurse on the bed as long as you have the pillows lined up where your bundle can't roll over. It helped me when I dozed off during our nursing schedules, which weren't schedules at all. I simply nursed when she was hungry and her hungry cry always made my milk let down (thank goodness for re-usable and re-washing covers to catch the milk when it lets down in your bra, especially when you are out and about with baby.

BTW, in the words of a wonderful woman, a wonderful and beloved aunt & surrogate mother, "don't worry about the dishes, the laundry, scrubbing the tub, mopping the floors, or vacuuming. Trust me, it's not as if these things are going to grow legs and walk off. They will still be there when you have time to get to them or arrange help at home, even a teenager who needs extra money to help with the housework. The only concern you have now is giving your baby the best start in life and that includes your presence, your love, your bond, and the time you share bonding & giving your baby the #1 antibiotics that will help immunize the baby to ward off illnesses that often plague formula-fed babies."

FYI: My 2nd daughter from the day she was born right up until her 5th birthday only got sick 1 time each year. It was due to an ear infection, which we later learned was a genetic issue. Her father has difficult problems with his ears because his body creates earwax faster than most. He has spent a lifetime fighting swimmer's ear, wax impaction, and nearly lost his hearing because of it. It seems our little one shares her dad's same problem. It wasn't even 3 weeks ago when I had to pour peroxide into each ear, let it bubble for 3-4 mins, then rinse using a bulb syringe with warm water and chunks of wax came out of hear ears on both sides. It had reached a point where she was having a tough time hearing. She cannot use q-tips of any sort, although pediatricians discourage the use of them for the ears anyhow because it can push wax further into the ear. The last thing you ever want to do is hold your baby down while a pediatrician or ENT has to use a scoop tool to remove the wax that has impacted on their eardrum.

Having a child with 1 illness a year from birth to 5 years old age was amazing after spending so many days, nights, and weekends with her older sister who was sick all the time. I still have trouble trying not to blame myself for the problems she has with her teeth today because I wasn't able to breast feed her so she could have been as healthy as her little sister after I nursed her. I hate she had to take all that Bactrim for the infections she continually came down with even when she entered kindergarten. She doesn't blame me but I can't help but blame myself much of the time so please know you are doing the best thing in the world for your baby and your baby's future. Just do a bit of preparation and you may find things run a bit smoother; lighten up and reduce your stress levels too because your son gets his cue, from YOU.

All my warmest wishes and miracle moments that will come over the years; enjoy them because they go by in a blink. Our oldest daughter just got married in October (2010) and it feels like yesterday I was taking her to kindergarten for the first time. Even our 13, almost 14yo daughter... it feels like I just brought her home from the hospital but she's having overnight sleepovers, going to dances, and even has a little boy who is sweet on her - so sweet in fact that he agreed to be in her sister's wedding as a groomsmen opposite our youngest daughter who was a bridesmaid. Before I know it, she will be heading off to college and as a mother, they won't need me as much. It's already happening with my oldest and it hurts. I feel that partial empty nest syndrome even now and she's been living on her own for over 2 years now. In about 5 years, our youngest will be following behind her by moving closer to or on campus (I'm so hoping she can get into Georgetown University; her dad wants a state college here in NC but I want her to know that life exists outside of this freaking state! Nothing bad about NC but I've lived all over the east, southeast, and the south; there is more to this country than this county, this town, and this state. It's so far out in the boonies where there aren't art shows, underground raves, pubs that serve Guiness on tap, or has a decent wine list...There isn't even any where close to us that has a movie house where they show Broadway plays, or nightclubs where you can choose great jazz or blues... I miss DC, I miss Arlington, I miss New Orleans, Atlanta, Richmond, etc... I miss the little cafe's and pubs around Georgetown U)...

Best wishes and know that I'm sending all my hopes that you two will find the way and you find the will to overcome this obstacle.

Warmest regards and all my best wishes.

Since you posted this a week ago, this has phase has probably ended for you, since it is normally a quick one, but I thought I'd post this for future readers :) Sounds like your baby is going through a growth spurt. They usually go through one at about a month old and they nurse ALL DAY LONG for a few days then go back to their normal "schedule"...as much of a schedule as they have at this age :) My LC told me that babies don't actually take any more milk, but they experience long bone growth which is painful, and nursing is comforting to them. My advice, and what I did with both of my sons when they went through this, is get comfy on the couch and keep lots of water and the remote nearby...it'll pass soon, and you can catch up on all the shows you DVR'd ;)

My LC said that the way to wean from the shield is to start the feeding with the shield, let him nurse for a few minutes then take the shield off and continue feeding. If he refuses to latch back on without it, just put the shield back on and try at the next feeding. I was never able to wean from the shield due to "anatomical" issues (flat/inverted nipples), but it is possible over time. I ended up getting Shield Shells for each of my shields to store them between feedings and keep one in my diaper bag and a couple around the house, so I'm never stuck without one. They are great because they keep my shields clean and protected from my dog and older son, and I got them at www.shieldshell.com