My husband and i bought a house 3 yrs ago, it is a duplex and we live on the second floor. Instead of paying child support his exwife lives downstairs with their 3 kids a girl 13 and two boys 12 and 8. I tolorate the living arrangements due to the fact i love the kids and i am hardly ever home with working full time and going to school full time. My son even likes the boys but him and the girl don't always see eye to eye. My eldest son comes around but not to often. Anyhoo since she lives down stairs i know that we are like landlords, in the sense that when things go wrong we have to repair them, but when do we not have to fix things. I'm not trying to be a brat but she is not contributing to the house payment which mind you is a struggle for us but when her hot water heater broke we replaced it, when her stove broke we fixed it. When do we not have to fix something.
Dazed and confused.
I would think that since he isn't paying child support, and you are the homeowners, you should make the repairs.
As a renter and the daughter to a landlord, contact your local city building community service office, they can tell you what you have to fix, etc.. Also, I am assuming that your mortage is over 1000, just for curiosity sake contact a lawyer and see what the average child support would be for three kids, cause if your getting the short end of the stick then you can have her give you the difference! P.S. YOU ARE A SAINT!
Better you then me... I would neverrrrrrrr go for that. You are a saint !!! I'd be making him pay child support !!!!
Well, V., unless you have a lease stating what repairs she will be responsible for and requiring her to contribute to the house payment, all the responsibility falls on you as the homeowner. Honestly, all this should have been arranged in a contract before you entered into this living arrangement. That would be more helpful to you because it would give you some sort of legal standing to take her to court if she was in breach of an agreement. Was there any kind of verbal agreement between you two and her?
How much would his child support be for that many kids? She could probably argue that what he saves in CS is equal to or greater than her share of the house payment. If your relationship with her is amicable, then maybe you need to have a sit-down and come to some sort of agreement. Unfortunately you need to be prepared to hear her say no. It would be the RIGHT thing to do to help out, BUT she's not legally required to do so.
...LF
Um, wouldn't it be easier (and cheaper) to just pay the child support? I would seriously consider just establishing the support. Since she has established residency, I think you are obligated to make repairs.
I think that maybe you need to put yourself in the exes shoes. She isn't receiving any child support for 3 kids! That can be very costly! If your husband helps out financially with things they need then I would cut back on replacing water heaters and such, but if all your husband does is provide the house that is a different story. Whose idea were the living arrangements? If it were the exes then I would do this math...divide your mortgage in half (the half would be what she would pay for rent) and subtract that number from the amount of child support you would have to pay. So if the mortgage is $1000 she would be responsible for $500 if she had a place of her own. If you would be paying more than that $500 in child support then it wont hurt you guys to continue to do these things, but if it is more than the child support would be I would explain to her exactly that. Keep in mind is she couldn't afford to live somewhere else you don't want to put those kids out in any way. It seems to me that someone isn't being fair here. If it is you and your husband then I ould suck it up bc it could be worse, but if it is the ex then I would just tell her that you will end your current arrangements and both find your own places and you will go back to paying child support. If she is getting the better end of the deal she may just back off, but if you guys are then cut her some serious slack!
oh my gosh, V.!!!
what a horrible situation! get out of the house! you have no idea the vulnerable state you are in with your relationship if you live under the same roof as his ex!!!
B. g
Oh, I just wanted to write and give you the credit you deserve for living in the same house as your husband's ex. Oh, I could not do that! You are just going to have to talk with your husband and get this woman to move out. He will pay less in child support than he (or both of you) are paying to have her in the same house. I also wanted to give you credit for having your husband and his ex wife at home while you are gone. That would bug me, BIG TIME!
As a renter I can tell you that in my lease the landlord is responsible for almost all repairs with only a few exceptions. Changing light bulbs are my responsibility and any damage I make as a resident I am responsible for. Does she own the appliances or do you? If she does she is responsible for fixing them. If you do you are responsible for them. I am sure you are saving a lot of money with this arrangement. But money isn't everything.. there is no way I could handle that setup. Best of luck!
As a renter I can tell you that everywhere my husband and I have rented the landlord is responsible for fixed items: water heater, furance, plumbing, etc. unless the damage is caused by the tenant then it is the tenants responsiblity. Also if the appliances are part of the house (they were there when she moved in) then they are your responsiblity, if not they are her's. You dont have to fix every "little" thing that is wrong with the apartment just as long as it is not a health concern is what I have been told by several sources. And I do commend you for letting her live under the same roof, that really has to be hard. But in my opinion she is getting the better end of the deal, I am sure with her having 3 kids and herself that the apartment has to be at the very least 3 bedrooms and around here you would not be able to rent a 3 bedroom for any less than 7-800 a month (most places beging alot higher). So if you are letting her live there free it sounds like a great deal, because I somehow doubt that even if she lived somewhere else she would have to pay that much to support their children. (which is what the support is supposted to be for)
I think you need to ask an attorney. Do you have a lease? That will state what you need to repair or not repair. This is not something anyone on here can answer for you. Better to have a lease drawn up than to go to court later on when you finally have had enough.
Blessings.
M.
