Need Advice for My 11 Year Old with ADHD

You have already gotten some good advice. I would be curious to know what school district you are in. I am a teacher, and I taught special education for 8 years. Schools CAN NOT refuse your child services based on the fact that he is unmedicated. The diagnosis alone is enough. You must do what you believe to be right. I understand that as a mother. However, I do suggest you also investigate some of the newer medications that are non-stimulant. Many of the problems you mentioned are related to the stimulant (not sleeping and eating) component of these meds. I do encourage you to continue to advocate for the services your child needs. That is your job as a parent. If you need to, contact the district office for special education. Often, there are also parent advocacy groups to help you with advice as to you and your child's rights. I am new to this area, so I can't recommend a specific one, but I know they are out there.

Good Luck.

I am not sure if I can help, since I chose to put my son on medication. It was a difficult decision, but I feel it was the right thing for us to do. He started on Adderal in second grade. He could not swallow a pill and it was a very difficult time. He did lose his appetite and had a few other minor side effects, but those wore off after a month or so. The improvement in his school situation was well worth the trials we went through. He also tried Strattera, which was a disaster. It made him tired and morose, so we went back to Adderal. He only takes the meds on school days, not weekends or vacations. Two years ago, our doctor changed him to Focalin and it has been wonderful. You take a much smaller dose for the same effect and it has very few side effects. He still has a loss of appetite during the day, but he eats a good breakfast and a really good dinner. He is now 13 years old (eighth grade) and is in the 85% in height and the 70% in weight, which is very good, since neither my husband or I are very tall. Beginning in about fourth grade, I gave him a chance to go with out medicine for a few days and he always chose to go back on it himself. He would come home from school and just be in tears, because he was so frustrated. I think this has been very helpful for it to be his decision to take the meds, because we do not have any power struggles over it. I don't know what medicines you tried with your son, but I do know that there are lots of options and not every medication works well with everyone. They even have a patch now.

You can fight the system and be an advocate for your son at school, but if they are being uncooperative, then it will likely not improve his situation. Regardless of your rights, you can't change people's attitudes. I would be concerned about how they would treat your son, even if you did "win" the rights. I have been told that ADHD does qualify for "special needs" status, but we have chosen to avoid having him labeled "special needs" as this would be detrimental to his self esteem. My son has pleaded NOT to be treated differently in classroom. He does not want to be singled out as different. This is very important, especially as they enter middle school. Kids can be very mean and not very tolerant of anyone who is different. If medication is not the answer for your son, then I would look for an alternative school choice. Homeschooling, private school or a charter school or perhaps a different public school, if possible. I feel your pain and know that you want what is best for your son. I wish you luck with your struggle and hope that you can find an answer.

Nobody loves your child like you do. Don't put him on meds, though I hope you find a good pediatrician. You should homeschool him. He's just not going to fit in the stupid mold created in public schools. See 101 reasons to homeschool.com

Good luck.

You need to see a homeopathic doctor. The first thing that they will do is take anything white out of his diet. White sugar, white flour, etc. Sugar is the worse thing that someone with ADHD can eat. You will see a big difference in him by changing his diet. Also, he needs to take a fish oil supplement. You can buy one that kids like at the health food store.

Don't ever forget that you are his mother and don't let them BULLY you into doing something that in your gut you don't feel is the right thing to do! From what I understand, as long as there is a diagnosis they are REQUIRED to make proper adjustments under 504. You ARE doing your part through diet and supplements, which is just as important as meds. You have chosen the HARDER road, not the most CONVENIENT road, which is probably what is causing them to be uncooperative. I have been told you can take an advocate with you to ARD meetings to speak on behalf of your child and express your son's needs with you and fight with you to get what he needs. I don't know where to find an advocate, though, so you will want to research that. Girl, I am mad WITH YOU on this one! Every child is NOT the same and the teachers MUST realize that.

The school has a child find responsibility. That is , if they suspect a child has a disability, they should do appropriate testing.

If the school has not done testing on your son, I would right a letter, to your school, and give a copy to the principal, his teacher, counselor, and special education director giving the school permission to evaluate your child for special education. They have tools that rate your child's behavior that can identify him as ADD or ADHD ( or I think it will say at high risk of having ADD or ADHD.

Once you give permission to the school they have 60 days to complete the testing. They may refuse the testing and say they must first do RTI. If they do, you need to ask for PWN (Prior Written Notice) of why they are refusing testing at this point and what has been done to rule out a disability.

I would also ask for a letter from your pediatrician stating your child has ADHD and ask for an immediate 504 plan while you are waiting for testing. This will give your son accomodations and modifications while you wait for testing to be done.

L.

Hi C.,
What type of vitamins is he taking? My son's teacher wanted him to be tested for ADD when he was four and I was reluctant to get him tested or have to put him on meds.

I put him on some good vitamins and from research I've done Pycnogenol(pine bark extract) helps a lot too. The product my son takes now is Might-A-Mins® Spectrum Isotonix® MultiVitamin and OPC-3 from Market America. It makes a yummy fizzy drink mixed with water and my kids drink it down no problem. Plus being a liquid, the vitamins are 95% absorbed.

They just came out with Might-A-Mins® Spectrum Isotonix® OPC-3 for kids and several other products they developed specifically for kids with spectrum disorders like autism and ADD/ADHD.

My son is now six and a couple weeks ago I had forgotten to give him his vitamins for a couple days in a row and his teacher approached me after school commenting on how disruptive my son had been at school that day. So for me, that was confirmation enough to know that the vitamins are working.

His teacher and I spoke about the diet thing and she doesn't think that he should be tested or has a problem now (as long as he's taking the vitamins). She has been very impressed with how focused he's become on his work.

Just in case you're interested, I've included a link to where you can find out more about the vitamins. They sell them in a 90-day supply, which is the best deal (I spend about $40/child per month) which is worth it to me because it's certainly better than going the prescription drug route). If you have any questions, please feel free to send me an e-mail. By all means, there are many products out there that can benefit him, just do the research and maybe try some things until you see improvement.

http://www.marketamerica.com/C./categories-69/childrenshe...

Best wishes to you and your son.

J.

OMG. . . You are reliving my story. The Mesquite schools did the same thing to me. I chose not to medicate and they did a couple small modifications but it wasn't enough and we just barely pulled through. My daughter is now 22 yrs old & is putting off college because she has no confidence and thinks she can't make it thru college. I am now SOOOO mad that I didn't fight harder for her in school. Fight for your child! It is not easy but you must.
I wish you the best of luck.