Need Advice - Oakland,CA

Hi A.!
Your son is no longer the age he was when he started, and just like your son has grown, so have those same children he used to play with 2 yrs ago.
The days are gone when it was easy for him to make friends, and maybe the same kids that "played with him" are no longer there- its time to make new ones. This happens with everyone, even adults. He is just going through that phase of becoming 5 and becoming older. He will be fine. I mean, life is not always going to be easy and making friends will take some work- he has to learn this too in kindergarten. Take care and believe me - this too shall pass. God bless.

A. I am so sorry I know when your child is unhappy it can really bother you because want to fix the problem.I remember when my oldest daughter was going through the same issues at her preschool I know that the teachers can not see everthing that is going on. So I would spend a few hours lingering around in the morning to observe for myself. Then I would make sure I knew all the kids names and try my best to meet the parents. I made my best effort to say Hi to all the kids in the morning. When I was able I spent extra time playing with a group of them with my daughter. Meanwhile telling them stories of how they are all the same and that they all have feeling. My daughter now tells me how much her friends liked me playing with them all.
I hope this helps, and good luck!
Sincerely,
A.

A.,

Ask your son's teacher for a list of what he does daily and who he plays with. Ask her to help him engage with others and find some playmates. Give it a week and see where you are then-- I would also encourage you to get him in a playgroup with other kids outside of daycare if you don't already belong to one.

Good luck~ I know it must be hard to hear that from your son~

Molly

I would ensure that you take your time in his drop off routine and be sure to allow for transition time. For example, take him to his room, and stay for 10 minutes. Take a timer with you and set it for 10 minutes. Let him know how long you are staying, and explain the timer. Support him while you are there, then when time is almost up give him hugs and kisses and let him know.

Try bringing him at a time when they will be involved in something. My son used to cry a ton at drop off, and then I started bringing him right when they would serve breakfast, no more tears ever after I figured that one out. Perhaps the teacher could have him help serve breakfast to the class or give him a special task to occupy him, and make him feel important. Perhaps you could take a day off and stay with him at school. If his behavior does not change, you might want to consider changing schools.

I wish you all the luck!

T. Solar
Founder
www.theparentpack.org