Nature Vs. Nurture

I think Nature is the black and white outline in the coloring book. Nurture is the people and crayons doing the coloring. The complete picture is a product of both.

Amen Tracy K! Well said!

Heterosexuality or homosexuality, tendency to be thin or heavy, tall or short, brunette or blonde? Nature

Empathy, work ethic, morals, education, sense of humor and all other non-genetic traits? Nurture.

Seems like the important stuff J. might be the nurture stuff, huh?

I think nature trumps nurture. I am adopted and I am nothing like my parents. I always joked one day I would find my biological parents and figure out these demons that drive M..

What is interesting, perhaps only to M., is there were family members I derived values from but it was like my personality drove M. to seek them when I needed guidance. They made sense to M., my parents did not.

My kids are all very much like M..

A bit of both. Sometimes we are hardwired a certain way. Creative, mechanical, etc.... How we deal with things with what we have I think has more to do with our life experience. So, parenting matters, therapy helps, etc.... I know my answer is vague, but the answer to this question truly is unknowable in my opinion.

Based upon my family, my husband's, and watching the adoptees vs. the non-adoptees, I think "nature", unless one's parents are abusive, extremely emotionally unhealthy, or neglectful. Nature can still trump that, but for most people, "nurture" (such as it is) then "wins".

It's a bit of both. My DH's cousins are twins. A few years ago, one of them got breast cancer. This year, the other one got breast cancer, too. My grandmother was/is a twin. Her sister had heart problems and a few years later my grandmother had heart problems (different ones and I think she got better care so she's still with us). There's a lot that's in the genes. I don't think it means you are doomed, but if you know your family (for example) tends to have addictive personalities, bear that in mind for yourself.

Then there's nurture. There's that kid who has a bad home life but a teacher or coach takes him/her under their wing and the kid comes out of it okay. Or the child abandoned in an orphanage who flourishes in a new home. Or simply steering your own child's tendencies toward behaviors that benefit vs harm. My SD is very gregarious and can be overwhelming to people. She loves theatre. It's a perfect outlet.

I like Tracy's coloring book analogy. Very well put.

Yes.

It's not a debate, or an either/or, or a prefictible thing...it's a joint thing.

Like food and water. Or breathing and heartrate. You need both. We can assign a random value of one over the other, buys that's all it would be. A few seconds difference, a few days difference. Both are equally important.

Is it nature or is it nurture? Yes. Both.

I believe both: your parents and family nurture you but ultimately you choose who you want to become and what you want to do, based on your nature; otherwise, the children of criminals that grow up seeing those behaviors, would all become criminals and thankfully not all do. Same with the children of very accomplished people that have seen driven hard working parents all their lives would be J. like them and many are not.

Thing is, genetics play a HUGE part in environment. Least where a child growing up in the home of the same two bio parents.

So, I guess my answer would be, nature plays a bigger part (of course, not in the case where a child is raised primarily by someone other then a bio parent).

I've got three kids (19, 17, 15). I see genetic tendencies in all three. Very DIFFERENT genetic tendencies.

However, OVERALL, and I AM pretty much at the 'When All Is SAid And Done' point, they are 'overall' what I expected them to be. But then I'm the primary parent, the bio parent, creating their environment, you know?

I don't think there's ONE (or even a SERIES of) formula(s) that works every time.

:)

I definitely think both. There are things innate in us (our nature), but it's how they are nutrured that ultimately determines how they play out. So I say both, but nurture plays a bigger role.

I think it is a total combination of both. I have three biological children and a stepson. All of them were pretty young when we blended families. My youngest has absolutely no memory of his biological father, however most of the time he is the spitting image of him. Then there are times when he makes a facial expression or does something exactly like my husband who raised him. I think that nature, nurture, personality and temprement all play a role in who we become. I see four very distinct personalities in my kiddos.

I believe studies are now finding that environment plays more of a role than recently believed. There are some recent books that take a look at this, A Genie in Your Genes and The Biology of Belief..

It's believed that too much emphasis is placed on one's genes and previously not enough on one's environment.

what fascinates M. about this newer kind of thinking is that we no longer have to chalk things up to , well most of my family is Diabetic, therefore, I too will become Diabetic. Or most of my family drinks and therefore, I will become an alcoholic.

Having come from a family of drinkers, along the way, I realized at a pretty young age that I don't have to become a product of my environment and although I was exposed to such behaviors, I didn't have to cope as my mother did by drinking . which leads M. to strongly believing that it's those coping mechanism we learn when young that in part direct us down whatever paths we choose to take..

The great news, at any point in time, we can usually choose to take another path .. so for example, the alcoholic whom initially believed it was genes that caused them to become an alcoholic can now be free of that thought and know that one's environment played possibly an even bigger role..

I love all this stuff.. great questions..

what prompted you to ask?

I think each of us are born with genetic markers, some may never get triggered and some may be prominent from birth. I think that environment teaches coping skills, temper, mannerisms, some personality, etc...so I think even if one has a genetic disposition to do something it can be tempered.

For example, one of my gay college roommates has a few idiosyncrasies like hand wringing. He would be sitting watching TV and I would watch him as the show would unfold. If it was suspenseful he would start wringing his hands. If he was under pressure it would be present too. In a subdued manner though.

His father had come out of the closet a few years before so he was comfortable with his sexuality, he had a brother who had Schizophrenia, and he had been told he carried the gene for it but it appeared to be inactive. He was told if he had had some horror or life event that triggered it he might develop symptoms but he might go through his life and never develop it. If he had had more stress with his sexual orientation he might have triggered that gene.

But he truly lives a charmed life. He met someone right at the start and they have been together nearly 20 years, they own several homes and have enough income to live on for the rest of their lives, they are both in finance so they manage money well.

He was cautioned about having children without genetic screening between he and a wife. Since he chose to not have a wife it became a non issue.

So both nature and nurture are present and both influenced by the other. That is why children in the same family can be vastly different.

its my true belief that you are a product of your enviroment..

I love this question, because I'm a die hard feminist who used to believe that most of it was nurture, but after having a girl, and getting to know some of her boy friends, I totally see the nature and the differences between boys and girls. Plus, my DD is so much like M. in ways that are not nurture-based.

This is not a matter of opinion.

This is a matter of science. Research will continue to uncover new information as we go. You can read about it online.

Science is a process that verifies and measures data from observations that can be replicated.

When people start attributing their opinions and values to issues that can be scientifically observed and measured, we start to assume characteristics of people we've never met (but we might know their neighborhood or parents). And that's not fair.