Nanny Requesting to Bring Newborn Grandchild into Home for Care

I would personally let her bring the baby. As a former single parent we all need a leg up and it sometimes truly takes a village.

I wouldn't agree to it until you renegotiated your pay rate tho.

you pay her for a certain amount of care for YOUR children in YOUR home.

If she wants to invite other children other than yours into your home, there should be a payment for that (ie; discount on your current rates for bringing the baby)

I would talk to the Nanny as well. Let her know your concerns and fears.

I do however agree with others who have said they couldn't bring their kids to work, etc. But these aren't easy ok times anymore. And sometimes compromises have to be made for the greater good.

How blessed could your children be by having a new baby in the house. Better yet, think of the blessing you are going to be to that baby, who would probably get substandard care from someone else, and for that single mom, who probably doesn't have any other way to get on her feet.

Good luck to you.

I've not been in the same situation as you before, but after much thought, I honestly don't think I'd have a problem with it at all. The new baby will need to be fed every 4 hours or so, but after that, they really don't do much at all, lol. I watched my son and a neighbor's son at the same time when they were infants, and it was actually very nice to see them stare at each other during tummy time, and kinda "talk" to each other, but neither child was neglected by any means. I would probably try to work out a decrease in pay, though. Not anything crazy because she can't watch all 3 children "as good", but something both parties can live with, fairly, because there's an extra child at your house. This would be a lot worse if you had a 5 year old with a newborn, but all children involved are very young. They can be playmates as they grow up!

L.,

Give it a try. Explain to your nanny your concerns and inform her if you feel it is not working out then you will give her notice to find her grandchild another provider.

I have been a single mom and it is tuff. Open your heart and your home maybe it will work out. Remember newborns sleep ALLLL the time! I don't think it will take from your kiddos. Good luck!

Take Care,

ELiyah

Hi L.,
I understand trying to be nice, but if this were me I wouldn't do it. I've realized that my 3 year old girls will need to have some full attention from the nanny and I'd like them to have some activities. It would be hard for a nanny to leave the baby or juggle the baby to take your children to the park to play. Sometimes you just have to say no even though you'd rather try to help. Good luck and I hope it works out.

Hello L.,

you got great responses. I just would figure out how it would impact your insurance. also put everything in writing and with great amount of detail. like when she's allowed and when she's not allowed to bring the baby and what is expected. Also what would be done if it does not work out. have a trial period of a couple of weeks... maybe 1 month? put it in writing. by having a trial period, it would help her daughter and help you decide if it's working out. Good luck! ~C.~

How different would it really be than if you had a third child? This used to happen all the time if you look historically at our culture. There used to be no other choice if you needed child care. The help's kids used to grow up side by side with our own. When did we get so selfish as to start worrying about whether our kids will be neglected? Back in the 1700's there used to be an average of seven children per family. We survived that. What is three in one house?

Honestly, it depends on how regular the care is..are we talking about everyday, full time? Or a very part time thing? I would say no to full time, mostly because you pay for a nanny to give your boys attention, and honestly, she is going to care about the grandchild more! Not because she is not a good nanny, she is just probably a better grandma. If you allow it for any time at all, I do agree that she should take a decrease in pay, and if it is not a long term thing, than maybe you could allow it, if you think this is the perfect nanny for you and you dont want to risk losing her. It is hard to remember the business relationship with a nanny, it becomes so personal, and you dont want to hurt feelings, or sound harsh, but you pay her to do a job. It may work out alright, so you could suggest a trial period if you want, but be ready and willing to say no if it becomes a problem. Good luck, this sounds like a tough call!! ~A.~

maybe break salary up into hours and figure out how many hours her grandbaby will be there and get a discount b/c you will not be getting her FULL attention for your kiddos for those hours.

Honestly, I would say.....no way. Why don't you just bring your kids to work with you? Because #1 your boss would not allow it, and #2 you wouldn't be able to get any of your work done. Same for her.

I would probably allow it 1 or 2 days at most but you are right as for thinking it might take away the time of your kids which you are paying her for.
I hope this helps.
M.

On the bright side the boys will have a new playmate.
However, I agree with the others on limiting if allowing it at all. I am sure she can handle them all but if you are conserned about attention...well, you know from your own experience a newborn is very time consuming. Also, if you have her take your kids to activities she will not be able to take the grandchild and that will cause issues. This will be a long term situation. Look at what your employee will be espected to do and if that is fesable with the extra child. You are nice to concider this but make sure you are willing to deal with all the drama it will bring(illnesses,classes,carseats,three toddlers/two hands). God Bless you and I hope it works out either way.