I have three children. My two-year two-month daughter depends on me a lot. It seems normal to a little girl, but at the same time, she seems resistant to her father: She refused to drink the milk her father brought to her; she doesn’t allow her father to dress her or hold her. But actually, she likes her father. I don’t know why and what I should do.
It's called a "mommy phase". Or a "daddy phase". Or a 'nana phase". Or a 'cousin/ aunt/ nanny/ pick a person in her life, any person in her life, phase" . Kids will either shun EVERYONE except one person, or shun one person, and be great with everyone.
It typically lasts a few weeks to a few months. Kids will often cycle through people as well.
Almost all little kids go through this. They favor mommy or daddy, or both back and forth. The main thing is not to freak out about it too much because they will just feed off of the attention.
Little girls can be fickle.
Your daughter will outgrow this.
She will go through a stage where she wants her dad and not you so much.
It's all part of figuring her world out.
I promise it's a phase. My daughter went through it and now at almost 5, she is a complete daddy's girl and prefers him to me in every way. This is the girl who was attached to me practically physically the first year of her life and a good portion of her second year as well. And being on the opposite end of things now does hurt.
It would help if they had something only the 2 of them do. Like if Daddy took her to the park Saturday mornings. Or if Daddy always did bath time. My son is 2 years, 4 months and we are in the same boat again. Only I will do. He wails like someone is killing him when his father puts him and his sister to bed if I'm home. He doesn't want much to do with his dad if I'm home. But when I'm not around, they are the best of friends. So my point is it won't always be like this and it's totally normal.
My daughter will be two next month and we are also going through this big time. She will only let me do anything for her. She will still kiss and love on daddy, but if mommy leaves the room there is a blood curdling screaming match going on. We are hoping this all just works itself out, right now we are trying not to give in to her constantly. I mean I love snuggling and cuddling her, but she is almost two, I'm 8 months pregnant, and I can't hold her all day long. I think for my daughter at least it also has something to do with the holidays. She didn't really understand why daddy was suddenly home with us all the time (for two weeks!) Last Thursday, she didn't want daddy to touch her, only mommy to hold her, but if daddy left the room she would freak out.
I'm sure it's just a phase, hopefully both girls outgrow it very soon! :)
she is still little. my middle child ( a boy) was similar he is more clingy then my two other kids. he just grew out of it.
We did not experience this but I have read on here a lot that kids go through their phases....mainly with daddies I have read. I'm sure it will pass.
Ella,
I remember that age :) it's very normal, they don't like changes at that age. I remember when I would make the milk for my children and had to tell them that grandma made it ('cause grandma lives with us and would always make their milk) so they would drink it. It wasn't that they didn't like me or loved me or even that the milk was not made the same, because they would drink it just "knowing" that grandma made it :) lol, but I suggest he tries to spend a little more time with her and do something special for her. Ask her what would she like daddy to do or make for her? see if that helps. If not, just give her time; she'll come around :)
Blessings
Try having daddy take her to something fun. Let her learn that daddy can mean fun and nurturing and dependability. If THEY leave together and are headed for something fun and you're not there, it might help. It is important for daddy to bond. She won't refuse the milk if he is the only one there that can hand it to her.
I agree with the others. It is a phase. My baby will only eat when dad feeds her (I have tried pretty much every kind of baby food and she just wants dad not mom so he feeds her when he is here and if he isn't the baby just has to deal with mealtimes with mom). Your daughter will outgrow it. I also think that it would be fine for you to pull parent rank and say dad is dressing you. Yeah, she might scream but you can't always get what you want even if you are a sweet little 2 year old girl.
We have gone through this in my house too. My now 3 year old only wanted my SO for a very long time. I could not win her over no matter how much I tried to. I actually started to resent her for a while (talk about Mommy guilt!), which made me feel so horrible! It has slowly gotten better, but in order to make this happen, my SO had to back off a LOT. If your LO doesn't want to drink the milk Daddy brings her, then she doesn't want any milk. If she's thirsty, she will drink it eventually. I started taking my DD out for little outings, just the two of us, even if it was just to run to the grocery store. She had to learn to rely on me a little more, and that seemed to really help. She still favors my SO to an extent, but I don't feel like the outsider anymore! Good luck!
Stress to your husband that it is a normal phase. My husband kept quiet and I found out later that it really hurt him. He took it personally and thought there was something wrong with him.
My husband gives it a cluesless/whatever, "Ohhh...your having your Mommy phase" and walks away. She is 5 and still has them.
It is really a phase that a lot of children go through. My grandson just turned three and he shares a very close bond with both of his parents but at times he "only wants'Mama" or "only wants Papa". They honor his request and just move on without any comment. Don't make a big deal out of this or it may REALLY turn into a big deal!! Assure your husband that this does not mean that she doesn't love him...she is just "exercising her options"....next week it may be Daddy that she wants for everything!!
both of you need to keep a sense of humor about this phase and not guilt trip her. don't do anything. go on about your lives (including plenty of daddy/daughter one-on-one time) and wait for the next phase to kick in!
:) khairete
S.
