My 8-Year Old Daughter Has Breasts!!!!!!!!

Updated on March 03, 2010
S.G. asks from Kent, WA
17 answers

I am trying to find out a way to discuss puberty with her. I don't want to go into too much detail pertaining to sex. Just how her body is changing. I don't want to scare her from talking to me about these issues. So if there is anyone out there that can help me please respond.

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T.E.

answers from Richland on

Hi, S..
I know that there is a great book out on the market...I believe it's called The keeping of me, a beautiful body book for girls. It's a great book that touches lightly on how their bodies are changing, including breast growth, when its time to use deoderant, make up, etc. It might be helpful! Good luck.
Has she seen her doctor regarding the growth of her breasts? If not, it may be a good idea. My cousin's little girl had this issue, and they found a problem...it is worth the discussion with the doctor.
Again, good luck\
T. E.

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B.G.

answers from Spokane on

I'm another one on the book thing. My son is now 9 but when he was 8 he started the whole puberty thing. I was definitely NOT ready for it. We went to the library and I found a wonderful book that address puberty for both boys and girls and it was age appropriate. It's called "Hair in Funny Places". It might be a good idea to read it first if you don't want her finding out about the boys yet. Personally I let my son know everything. I felt it was best for him to learn it all.

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V.H.

answers from Las Vegas on

I had breasts by then and my period right before my tenth birthday. My got me a book at the bookstore. I in turn got my stepdaughter a book about this stuff from the bookstore. It was not expliciate but informative. There are actualy lots of books for young readers about this stuff, so go down to the kids section of the bookstore and under the life leasons section and read through them and find one your daughter will understand. Be frank with her. It would be good for her to know about sex, and it's purpose for reproduction, and the reasons why people do it while underlining the importance of your own values about sex. My mother had a friend who was told you have babies by kissing so she ended up getting pregnant without ever kissing her boyfriend.

1 mom found this helpful
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R.C.

answers from Stockton on

The best thing that I have found is the book called "Taking care of me", a girls guide by a group called American Girl.
I got the book at Costco, but you can get it at most book stores I believe as well. I know that Barnes and Noble has the series. There are a few different books as well for different ages. Since she is developing her period will be coming very soon. Thhis book would be great for both of you. You may want to go to the book store and read it first to make sure that you think it's appropriate for her.

Good luck!

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H.E.

answers from Eugene on

I have twin 8-year-olds who also have breasts. Here is what I did.
First, I saw their doctor who tested them to be sure that their physical developemental age was the same as their age in years, which it was. My doctor then told me that their menstral cycle was not far off, maybe within two years.
So, next I went to the book store and picked up a female development book that was easy for them to understand and read.
Lastly, I sat down with the book and my girls and we had a discussion about body changes.
The best advice I ever received (on this topic) was to look at it scientifically. Break it down to the bare functions of the body. Even sex. I just had a baby, so that subject had to be explored more fully in my houshold than it may be necessary in yours. The important thing is to make sure you use the proper terms for body parts and explain only what you are comfortable explaining.
I hope that helps. Good luck!

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D.B.

answers from Columbus on

My eight year old daughter also has breasts...and is starting to mature in other places(hair). We had our little talk that mothers are suppose to have with daughters and it was so embarrassing....and when we get up in the mornings i help her put on her bra and she hates it....i don't think u have anything to worry about cause when she comes home everyday she tells me that other girls at her school is talking about it also.....so what u don't tell her she will learn at school...just make sure u are the first one to talk about sex to her. My daughter doesn't want to talk about it yet....she just says "mom not today" so i think she kinda has an idea....i also think it's just the idea of them growing up.....they are our babies and we want them to stay little so we can protect them.....just ask her what she already knows and what she has heard from friends at school, cause believe it or not they already know.......i hope this helps....and if u find anything else to do please let me know.........thanks...

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L.H.

answers from Seattle on

My personal opinion on this topic is to be as open and honest as possible because it means your daughter's understanding of her own sexuality. There isn't anything wrong with having breasts and the more 'demystified' she is the better. You'll be making her very curious if you act wierd about this in front of her. She does need to have a mature understanding of her body and what it will be going through and why for her own good. Talk to her pediatrician as well if you need some help explaining things...Good Luck!

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H.W.

answers from Las Vegas on

I would tell my daughter that when a girl begins to turn into a young woman, her body goes through certain changes. I would explain what changes to look for and probably explain a period to her as well. You should be willing to answer any questions she has. If she knows, now, that she can talk to you about these things, she will be more comfortable in the future discussing anything with you. Be open and honest; you will know just how far to take the discussion by the questions she has. Good luck

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M.R.

answers from Seattle on

I never really had guidance as a child when it came to this, so I like other moms researched what was best. I spoke with my girlfriends, talked to my child's pediactric MD, and researched book options online. I finally came to the American Girl book, "The Keeping and Caring of You". Bath and Body Works also has other books for girls that are our daughter's ages. I agree with the other posts, reading and discussing it with your daughter is best. When they're young, I found the very practical scientific process to work best. Now that I have an 11 year-old though, I'm preparing for when she comes to me with the more difficult questions. Good luck.

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C.R.

answers from Seattle on

S., I can relate to this problem. My daughter just turned 9 in December and has breasts also. She is growing at a much faster rate than I remember doing. I have bought her undershirts/training bras, etc. She doesn't seem to like the bras and feels uncomfortable in them, being that not many other 3rd graders wear them. She is most comfortable in undershirts/tank tops, which seems to work for now. I haven't discussed puberty/sex w/ my daughter yet either. I have just explained that she's growing, etc and it's appropriate to wear these undergarments as a woman/girl. I'm probably not much help, but definately can relate to this, especially when she's got older friends who don't have this problem.

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K.G.

answers from Seattle on

8 sounds so young but I do know that is the trend....girls entering puberty younger. You might want to check with her doctor/pediatrician but I had a couple other thoughts. First, I remember being quite frightened when I started developing because I thought I might have cancer and was too scared to bring it up with my mom. One of my friends finally put my mind at ease that it was normal.

Second, she probably knows more than you think but also probably has some misinformation too. I was a high school health teacher in my former life so my students were older but I always was interested how much diversity in knowledge they had. Always some misinformation too.

Having no idea how comfortable you are talking with her or what you have already talked about, maybe bring it up if you see a commercial on for tampons or pads. Ask her if she knows what they are for and if she knows what a period is. My advice is keep it really simple so that she isn't scared but tell her as much as she asks. Then maybe just tell her that you heard more girls are getting their periods and developing breasts younger and younger and ask if she is sore or is intersted in a training bra. I'd probably leave sex out for now unless she asks. Books are good too if you aren't as comfortable talking to her. Good luck!

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K.S.

answers from Seattle on

Hi S.,

There are lots of books on how we grow and change. One option is to look at a local library for the information. I would say just simply chat with her about the changes. The most important thing is that she knows you are there for her, and unafraid to approach topics that might not be easy or pleasant to tackle. You have to try to remain relaxed as well. I agree with the person who said to ask how she is feeling lately. For example, if she has begun menustrating she may have questions on that. Also, if she needs a training bra, then that might be fun for you to shop for together. Taking a child out to get an item like that shows encouragement and support. Hope this helps...

Blessings,

K

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A.P.

answers from Seattle on

my step daughter went thru this too. It is the start of puberty although she didn't get her period until almost a year later. 10-15 used to be the norm but it is now 8-12!!! We talked to her alot about it but she was pretty shy. We got her a few books & they helped her understand & cope much better! 1 book was "the body book for girls" to explain the changes that are happening & about hygiene. It has a companion book called "the feelings book" obviously about feelings & how to manage the rollercoaster!!! THere was a journal that came with but I can't find the name. both can be ordered together on amazon.com for $18.90 together..here's the link http://www.amazon.com/Care-Keeping-You-American-Paperback... they are written & illustrated specifically for girls grades 3-6. After reading them she became much more open about it. Really excelent choice!! Also really good is "ready set grow" we got her that too but she related best with the other 2. Hope this helps!! Good luck!

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H.E.

answers from San Francisco on

Hello I don't have a girl who is that age but I did have and incident with my son check him self out and i did not know how to handle it so i talked with his doctor and he gave me some paper work on talking to your children at a there age about there body parts and changes that will happen to them. I noticed it had come from planned parenthood's website so you could go on there and pull the information off.
it had all ages form 4yrs to teen age years. Really great informations.

young mom of 2

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E.T.

answers from Portland on

When I was younger my mom had bought a book pertaining to body change and sex. She had me read it by myself then get her when I was done to talk and ask whatever questions I had about it or anything else. You could try that.

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D.G.

answers from Portland on

There are a lot of great books out there for just about every age. I suggest getting them from the store rather than online so that you can read them over first and be sure it is what you want. With my son I just tried to be as technical in my wording and as open as I could be. I wanted to be sure I didn't convey anything about his questions that could be miscommunicated. If you are to shy and embarassed you need to practice so you don't come across that sex or puberty changes or whatever else you are discussing comes across as an embarassing thing.

Good Luck

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B.H.

answers from Seattle on

Ask her how she has being feeling lately. Ask her if she noticed that she is starting to become a young lady. Start from there. Then tell her that you want to talk to her about something serious and it is a BIG secret between you and her. Then slowly talk to her about being a girl. Sex doesn't have to be talked about. Just tell her that girls and boys start to change when they get older. If she asks how boys change tell her you don't know you are not a boy. But be funny about it. Explain to her the things girls go through and avoid talking about sex. I suggest you write yourself a play. Write everything you want to tell her. Then pretend you are her and answer them before you talk to her. If you do this before you sit down and talk to her you will feel a little more comfortable. I hope this helps.

B.

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