My 7-Year-old Son

Updated on March 29, 2007
C.B. asks from North, SC
9 answers

My 7-year-old son has ADHD. It has been a real challenge. He is now on Focalin 5 mg in the morning. We are having a real problem with him right now. He does not want to do anything for himself. We have to fight with him to do his homework, eat his supper, get dress. I am so frustrated to tears. We are sending him to a local christian school, but I feel like spending that money is a waste because he is just blowing everything off. He is so smart and that is one reason why this is so frustrating. Does anyone have any suggestions to help me deal with him.

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E.D.

answers from Asheville on

I think you need to stop fighting your son. Set up a schedule for him for the day: These are the things you need to do in the morning, during school, after school, at bedtime. Write them out clearly and post them on his bedroom wall (Get dressed, brush teeth, eat breakfast, etc). Make it clear to your son that he needs to do these things, or there will be conseqences. I don't mean punishments, but natural consequences. For example, if you don't want to get dressed, fine, get on the bus in your pajamas. Don't want to do homework? Then you can explain to your teacher tomorrow why you didn't do it. Don't eat supper? It's a long time until breakfast, and the kitchen is closing now. I know your son has the added problem of the ADHD, but don't let this be a crutch for him or for you.
Remember to take care of yourself. If you feel tears of frustration, leave the room, take some time for yourself.

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L.S.

answers from Roanoke on

dont feel bad i have a 7yr old with adhd he is on 80mgs of strataria and sometimes i have the same problems with my son my dr put my son on a mood med to help and it has worked so far my son would tell me school is stupid , he hated school and would not egt ready for school he also is being treated for bipolar i foould out that some kids are mis labled with adhd and are bipolar instead( im not saying that is the case with ur son im just letting u know what i found out ) hope it will help u maybe a different med might work better for ur son

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N.C.

answers from Raleigh on

I have a 9 year old son with ADHD and we have experienced a lot of the same things you are going through. I do feel for you because there are days when I look at him and think to myself "WHAT is going on in that head of yours???" Very frustrating.

I would immediately talk to your doctor if the Focalin is not doing the trick....if you haven't been on it long...they might ask you to wait a little bit longer but typically, my experience with my pediatrician is if it's not working...let's try something that is. We did try Focalin and I didn't see any positive results from it and saw ALL of the same things you are seeing with your 7 year old. There are other meds out there and it's your doctor's job to help you find the one that works for your son....it's frurstrating for you and his teacher's while you go through this process but think about what HE is going through trying to find the right combination on top of all the other things he goes through we don't understand. If all the medications caused the same response there would be no need for the variety we have available to us...all children are different therefore they are going to respond different to medication.

My son is on Dextroamphetamine XR 5mg...we just started this dose about 1 1/2 weeks ago because Strattera 5 mg was no longer doing the trick from him...he didn't want to try...losing focus during homework in the afternoons...inattentive during school...things of that nature. Keep in mind as his doctor and teachers have both told me...this time of year...a lot of kids are starting to become "immune" to their current ADHD medication...it does not work as well if they have been taking it since the beginning of the school year. That is the case for my son and I realize I am not alone...I hope you have a support system to let you know you are not alone in this daily fight that a lot of people just can't understand what we go through as parents of ADHD children.

Best of luck and feel free to drop me a line for support. I do feel like you were describing my son when I read your posting! :)

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M.D.

answers from Norfolk on

C.,

I have a 7 year old on Focalin also. He used to be on concerta, but one day decided he couldn't take pills anymore. I noticed a change in my son once we changed his meds. I'm assuming your son is on Focalin because he won't take pills either. If that is not the case, try switching to Concerta. We had wonderful results with it. Is your son seeing a therapist? My son sees and art therapist and she is wonderful. Each week we have new problems and each week she works her magic. If you live in the VA Beach area, I can give you her name.

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N.B.

answers from Columbia on

your son already has a diagnosis of ADHD, but he may have other issues. If you haven't done so already, get him a complete allergy work up. Allergies present themselves differently in children, sometimes in lack of focus and hyperactivity. Most importantly, have your son's eyes examined by a DEVELOPMENTAL OPTOMETRIST. mal or underdeveloped eye skills can result in behavior that mimics/exacerbates ADHD. this makes no sense until you realize that 80% of the information we take in comes through the eyes. if you son is not seeing what you see, he cannon possibly respond the way you expect him to. in the mean time concentrate on the things your son is good at, give him plenty opportunities for success. your son is frustrated. he is well aware of your frustration with him and he's probably not feeling great about it. now, go and google these three things and remember to enjoy your son.

#1 Dr. Hansen's Vital Formulations Acuity ADHD Support Formula

#2 Developmental Optometry

#3 Parents Active for Vision Education

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M.G.

answers from Charleston on

I know this might be challenging. I am a special education teacher and might have some suggestion for you. Try setting up a schedule for him with the things he needs to do every day . Make a chart with homework, supper, getting dressed. THis will be a checklist of the things he needs to do. Have him check the things that he does as he does them. Reward him at the end of the day doing something at the end of the day that he likes if he does at least 4/5 things. Try this it might work. Positive reinforcement works with young kids.
I hope this works.

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J.H.

answers from Greenville on

i know he may seem young but some good counseling from a therapist that specializes in adhd children will help. i know i found one for my son iagnosed at 8 (finally). we were out of our minds he would fly off the handle at anything and had an older brother who loved to push his buttons to watch him explode. all of this slowed down as he aged and continued in couseling (with meds). check withn your doctor he may need a stronger dose too (sorry nobody likes to hear that). hope this helps...yours with compassion ... J.
ps my son is now 23 and right as rain with no meds.

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J.S.

answers from Colorado Springs on

Hi! My name is J.. I used to be a special education teacher before I started working from home. I've learned a lot about ADHD in both my careers. One thing I would maybe take a look at is his nutrition. I've learned that if the brain and body aren't getting the nutrients they need, behavior could be affected and kids with ADHD even more so. My stepson is being tested for ADD and we've put him on natural vitamins and supplements to ensure that he is getting the nutrients he needs and there have been many success stories with them. Some to the point of never having to put on meds or being taken off meds. The vitamins and supplements I'm speaking about are linked to my wah job. I'm partnered up w/an international wellness company that manufactures natural products (non toxic). They are absoluteluy wonderful and we've noticed that my stepson is better able to focus at school. So, we know that he is benefiting from it. i could surely get you more info if you're interested in the nutritional aspects. Another thing I've learned is that kids who have ADHD also have a more intense reaction to toxins in their environment. I wish I had known more of this when I was teaching because I would often "disinfect" my classroom with Lysol. Come to find out that it is a registered PESTICIDE and only causes horrible reactions to these kids! I feel aweful knowing all that now, but now that I know that this is part of the problem and just by changing some environmental factors as well as the nutritional factors, it can really improve the way our children feel and behave. I'll look through my emails and see if there's anything else I can send you concerning this research. ok?

Hope that helps!

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S.B.

answers from Columbia on

I don't think I told you this before, but my son is on Dexedrine, it is one of the newest meds. but has the least side effects. It worked well for the first year and then started not doing so well. It is just like his body got used to it. I liked that it did NOT make him a zombie, but really made him concentrate. I thought it was a MIRACLE, b/c he done so well for such a long period of time. Now we are back at square one. My doctor tells me that it's a trying time trying to figure out what works best for your child. Sometimes one med. will work for one, but not the other. I'm still be tried, by the same things you mentioned everyday. I'm here if you want to talk. ;-)

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