My 4 Yr Old - Weedsport,NY

One of my 4 year olds will go so far as to hold herself. She will deny that she has to go potty even when it's obvious. She doesn't want to quit playing/leave the room allowing sister to take over the toy she has/miss something. If it seams to be the same case with your 4 year old (and it is VERY normal at this age) then it is behavioral. It doesn't mean that it is a mental/behavioral problem that needs psyciatric help. Behavioral in this case just means it's not physical. I personally would be very glad that it isn't physical!

When my daughter's father was abusing me, she peed the bed EVERY night. I don't care how many times I got her up and took her to the bathroom, she always had a wet bed in the morning. I didn't link the two until I left her father. From the very night we left, she didn't pee the bed anymore. There were no other signs of acting out - only the bed wetting.

So, even though you don't see any other signs, it could be due to the impending arrival of her sibling. Just don't put too much pressure on her; cover the couch for now and keep working with her.

My DD is also 4 and having accidents. She has been to the pediatrician and is fine. I've spoken to her teachers. The teacher assures me that DD is not the first nor the last child to need to be reminded about going to the bathroom. I would do things like no longer allow her to sleep on the couch or only sleep on the couch if she's in a pull up or underjams. If she pees on the rug, get Nature's Miracle to clean it up. I told my DD that if she wants to do things like go to a neighbor's house for a playdate or she wants to go to a birthday party, she must use the potty. I remind her all day long as if we were earlier in the potty training process. I praise her when she is dry, and make her clean up when she is wet. I tell her she must stop what she is doing and go right away. One of my DD's problems is she'll realize she needs to potty, and then get distracted on the way to the bathroom. I'm working on her to just GO to the POTTY and not pet the cat, etc.

So I'm with the doctors. I think it's behavioral. Your daughter and mine are not the only kids who have had this issue. It is frustrating, but not unheard of.

I would take her to a specialist and have them rule out any problems with the urethra. If she is physically fine then put in place a reward system for staying dry. Also go back to potty training basics for awhile where you have her go to the restroom every hour whether she feels the need or not. It may just be that she is so consumed with what she is doing that she doesn't realize she has to go until it is too late. By having her empty her bladder every hour she will hopefully recognize the difference between an empty bladder and one that is full and being "held."