My 21 Month Old Doesn't Want to Go to Bed. He Gets So Upset That He ....

Is he maybe overtired? When they get overtired, it can actually be harder for them to go to sleep and they can get more wound up. How exactly did the bedtime end getting pushed later and later? Do you have a routine in place that helps him start to wind down in preparation for bedtime? My daughter is 3 and we have always had changing into PJs, brushing teeth, stories and cuddles before bed. And it happens at the same time every night. She is so used to it by now that she really does not protest when it is bed time. She will find all kinds of ways to drag it out ("One more story Mama please!") but we just stand firm and stick with the routine. She knows what is coming and what to expect.

as mentioned earlier might want to talk to your doc. about sensory and gag issues. also,i had many issues with my son and his eating too long to mention it's all better now but still he gets weird sometimes.......some was sensory i am sure and alot of it i found out was due to being tongue tied check in on these issues especially ask about tongue tie,that was the reason for his problems because he did not have the ability to move it around and would choke and gag on food,things to think on.

Maybe try some activities that will wear him out, like playing in the yard chasing a ball, or take him for a walk around the block and have him walk with you. Something that will use up his energy.

With my 2 1/2 year old she's struggles with going to bed or nap, unless she's tired. When she is she'll go to be without fuss and actually help with the getting ready for bed process so she can lay down.

One other thing that you may want to try is a really good set routine. ie. dinner, energy burning activity, bath, pj's, story and lights out. Maybe with some consistency with his bedtime he'll start preparing for nap time.

Good luck.

go back to an earlier bedtime. He sounds overtired.

You said, "He has feeding problems that he needs to be treated for." Why haven't you had him treated. It is odd that he would have food still in his stomach hours after he has eaten. SO If he ate at 6 pm, and still throws up food at 9, then he has to be treated....BUT Now if you fed him AND put him down right after and he throws a tantrum to not go to sleep, then it is the crying & carrying on that is inducing the vomiting.

Overtired kids fight sleep more than rested kids. Get that bedtime back to 7 or 7:30! Establish your routine & stick to it. The bath, book, prayers, etc are cues and a gradual transition to bed.

Argghh.. I know what you are talking about. Crying and throwing up is so frustrating... Fortunately, it gets better as they grow up.
Getting bed time back to an earlier time and sticking to a routine are good ideas. Just a few additional things you may want to try:
-Maybe he does not want to sleep in his crib any more? It is good to keep them in the crib for as long as you can but if he does not want to lie down in his crib, it may be time to switch?
-Sleep with a lovey/stuffed animal
-Lay down with him or hold/cuddle him until he is really sleepy, then put him in his bed. You can gradually decrease the cuddle time then.
-Gentle massage to his feet and legs
-Soft soothing music/lights

GL! Let us know what works!

EDIT: I have seen in your previous posts that he has feeding issues. Has he ever been checked by a pediatric ENT doctor for gagging/throwing up? Or for sensory issues?

we, too, suffered bedtime woes. they have become a little easier with age. perhaps you sit next to him and touch his back until he's almost asleep for now. a couple of days later you might sit in his room but not touch him until he's sleepy. until you get to the point where you can cuddle/rub back/whatever your comforting thing is for under a minute and then tell him that you will check on him in one minute. then do it. then check on him in 3 minutes (or so) and then do. this will build trust. after a few long nights mine was often asleep before the second check up. good luck!

note: i see someone spoke of going to a big boy bed. this actually helps us, too. i think my daughter felt like she had more control.