My 2 Year Old Son Hates Bathtime! What to Do?

Updated on June 14, 2010
D.M. asks from Littleton, CO
17 answers

My 2 year old used to just hate to have his hair washed, but loved the bath and playing in it. Now when it's time for his bath he goes nuts - runs away, cries and screams and trembles! He needs to take a bath, but I don't want to "torture" him. Any suggestions from anyone who has gone through this?

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So What Happened?

Thanks so much! He's still struggles, but I am going to make it more fun, and skip the hair a few times.... then maybe he'll get comfortable again!

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A.S.

answers from Eugene on

My 2 yo just went through this. At first I tried a quick bath, not often as possible, and it got worse.

Get some new toys let him watch you toss them into the tub, so he wants to go in and get them. Then let him play in the tub for awhile time. Give him a bath a few days in a row and just let him play then introduce the washing. He will start to associate baths with play.

I let my daughter play, while I cleaned the bathroom, then do quick wash and out. She does hate the water in her eyes. She has started to lay down to rise out the soap in her hair. That helps a ton! She has started to enjoy the baths again, it took a bit. Good Luck!!

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P.W.

answers from Dallas on

with my son it had to do with getting water in his eyes. We gave him a towel to hold over his face when we rinsed his hair and that satisfied him.

1 mom found this helpful

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A.J.

answers from Dallas on

My middle son went through this phase - but his issue was all water - he refused the swimming pool and shower too. He's 4 now and well grown out of that phase but at the time it was an impossible phobia that drove him into hysterical fits and hyperventilation at times.

All the responses below should work well if your son is just going through a 'little bath-phobia' so try them first.

If it is extreme, here's what worked for me:

1) Buy some waterless soap and shampoo for those days he just can't take the bath and you don't have an hour to spend working him into it. These are meant for people who hike/camp so they are easy to use (rub on, dry washcloth off) and as an added benefit are hypoallergenic and safe for the environment. I would clean him in my bedroom so he felt safe and relaxed. Note: I only used this out maybe once a week. Sunday mornings were usually really hectic.

2) Stage waterless playtime in the bathtub. Bring in washable markers, watercolors or other fun stuff he usually can't play with and let him go at it. You can just rinse it out later so no worries on clean up. Keep his usual bath toys in there. I would even encourage my son to color on the toys (which were cars, btw) so that after playtime I could tell him they were all 'dirty' and playtime was fun but they needed to be clean. I'd have him wash them with soap, water, and shampoo in the sink and monitor him closely, talking to the toys like they were people and telling them how nice and clean they looked and I bet the shampoo and soap felt so nice. I didn't talk to him directly or leave room for him to argue.

Later that night I'd stage the playtime all over again but when it came time to end I'd say how dirty everyone was and run just a little water in the bottom of the tub so he could clean the cars and himself. I'd tell him the cars wanted him to be clean too and he could tell him when there was enough water.

So you start out with only a couple inches of water and each time push the envelope until he can handle a full bathtub. It took me about a month before there were consistently no issues with bathtime but by the first week it was tons easier already.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Its a phase.
He'll get over it.
In the meantime a child still has to be bathed/washed hair.

My son, is that way. He went through that phase many times.
ONLY my Husband, can successfully wash his hair without screaming. I don't know why.
But I will 'wash' my son's hair by using a wet wash cloth with a drop or 2 of shampoo in it, then scrub his hair gently... like a sponge bath. Then I rinse it out with the washcloth and clean water. My son, will "tolerate" that, but still screams.

Or, I would sometimes take my son outside on a hot day, turn on the water sprinkler, make him naked and wash him out there. We have a fence and no one can see in our yard. And no, it did not create a 'habit' of having to do this.

Or, I just gave my son sponge baths... which he tolerated more.

LOTS of kids go through this. It is not unusual. Just not easy.

all the best,
Susan

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J.G.

answers from San Antonio on

My 2 yr old is doing the SAME THING. He just doesn't lie the water in his eyes. He says to me "eyes hurt" and I dab them with a dry washcloth and he's happy again. Keep the washcloth there so that HE can dry his face himself.

My 2 yr old loves to play with his squirt gun in the bathtub. Sometimes it gets out of hand, but we laugh and play and it's not a big deal to me if some water gets on the floor. We just wipe it up. He loves it when I scream and giggle when he gets me wet. And then he's good and calms down when I tell him to.

I often give my 2 yr old son two choices. So lately, it's "Do you want to have a shower or a bath?" If he wants a shower, husband or I will hold him and bathe him. He gets less water in his eyes when I can put his head up to the nozzle.

I plan to buy one of those shower head sprayers soon too. For now, during bathtime, I tell him to "look up" while I pour water to rinse his head. I put my hand on his forehead to prevent water from getting in his eyes and then dab his face with the washcloth when I'm done. Not perfect, but he's getting the hang of it.

KInd of scattered answer. I hope something I said helps you.

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J.S.

answers from Dallas on

What about doing a shower instead of a bath? It might make him feel like a big boy.

C.M.

answers from St. Louis on

Tell him he can have a bath or shower. Let him pick out toys for the tub. If he still fights it, make it a game and see if he can get in / washed / out before you finish singing a song.

Or get into the bath or shower with him (or have Daddy do this).

If all else fails, hose him down outside and call it a day!

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M.R.

answers from Columbus on

get everything ready, and move quickly. You have to bathe him, it is just how it is. My 13 year old was like this, and she has no memory of it, so don't think another thing about it. In about 12 years, you will be yelling at him for using all the hot water (and failing to touch the shampoo...)

M.

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D.S.

answers from Denver on

I went through this too. Before he started potty training he peed in the tub and after that was afraid of the bath. It was pure torture to get him in the tub and quickly washed. Fortunately, this passed as he started to potty train. Now he loves the tub again. Hang in there--this will pass!

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D.K.

answers from Washington DC on

Give him sponge baths until he's over this. Kids just get afraid of things sometimes. Wash his hair in the kitchen sink. Use a washcloth with baby wash on it to clean up the rest of him.

Another thing to try before the sponge baths is...maybe he feels like he needs more control. Sometimes letting kids assume control can help them combat their fears. Let him turn the faucet on and close the drain (let him play around with this for a while if he needs to, so he understands the relationships going on), let him wash his own body (there are these soaps, called Sudzers I think, that have a mesh net around the soap bar so it's easy for kids to keep ahold of), let him try laying back to rinse his hair instead of dumping water on his head etc.... Bath time may just make him fearful because he doesn't understand it, so letting him try it himself and get used to doing it himself will help him understand it better.

Also, try asking him to tell you why he's scared. Let him know that you want to help him. Say something like "Mommy knows that the bath makes you scared sometimes. Why are you scared of the bath? Maybe Mommy can help you feel better about it." and really listen to him and try to understand what he's trying to tell you.

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C.M.

answers from Denver on

My daughter went through this, suddenly, around that age. She seemed terrified of the tub, and it had us vexed. What worked for us was to make her bathroom a really fun place. We went and got a new shower curtain, rug, tub
mat, etc all to make the bathroom a fun place all her own (it's not "her" bathroom, but she's the only one who usually uses it. Guests will just have to deal with the Duck theme ;) This seemed to do the trick for us. Good luck.

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A.P.

answers from Pocatello on

My last child did this at 2, also. We made bath time *just* body washing & playing. For hair washing, I laid him on his back on the kitchen counter, and used the squirter with warm water to wash his hair, like when you get your hair washed & cut at a salon. WIthin about a month and a half, he was willing to let me carefully wash it in the tub again.

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S.B.

answers from Redding on

Both of my kids preferred showers from the time they were very little.
Give that a try.

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C.P.

answers from Provo on

I used to let my kids take a shower with the removable shower head. When my sons had an issue with the bathtub I let them take hotwheels in the tub. We have also used soap that is in the shape of crayons so they can draw things. I also bought my little guy an actual Spongebob sponge from walmart and he loves it. I also showed him how to cover his eyes with a washcloth when I rinse his hair. I can all change in a matter of days...

C.B.

answers from Kansas City on

my son has gone through various stages of "hate" regarding the bath: hates his hair washed, hates me washing him, sometimes just downright hates his bath altogether. i think they all do. it helps to liven things up a bit. we do have a removable shower head which helps sometimes. sometimes it's as simple as giving him a S. cup from the kitchen to pour water in. sometimes i go in his room and find a "watersafe" toy to add to his bath collection, sometimes i splurge and get him bubble bath or bath paints (they have TONS of choices at walmart, both in the health and beauty section, and the baby department).

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T.W.

answers from Denver on

So my 2 year old has just started this! My other three never did. Needless to say, she has always hated her hair being washed but never had a problem getting in the bath to play. Just two weeks ago it became WWIII. All I did is start putting her in the bath screaming and all every single night and did not wash her hair. After about 3 baths she calmed down and after bath 5 I washed her hair again. He carried on and threw a fit but then then next night I just did the bath as usual each night. I still have a problem with her and washing her hair but she does not have a problem with the bath itself.

Hope this helps. Good luck!

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L.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

http://www.lilrinser.com/index.html

okay, so the site is a little odd but this thing saves me from fits all the time.

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