T.'s message reminds me of how much I think that young moms have a lot of pressure these days to "produce" the right kind of child. Who knows if this really relates to T.. It's just that her question made me think of this"
I am now a social worker (and I've done just about every kind of social work) but I used to be a special ed teacher. I still teach, but at the college level. I am now a grandmother. My daughter is an adult. I was not a stay-at-home mom. I would have stayed home longer than I did, but finances would not allow it. But I would not have made the "staying at home permanently" choice, anyway.
I really think that in our area (I lived in T.'s county for a long time and now live close by) there is a huge belief in scheduling all kinds of things for babies and older children. There is "stuff" and "gadgets" for everything. Kids don't just get to be kids. There's a shove to "achieve", a belief that "a parent-especially a mother--just has to" do a lot of things that I think create stress for kids and undue pressure on parents to measure themselves in ways that takes the humanity out of being a human being. It also forces parents to spend more money than necessary.
Kids are over-scheduled. Kids are forced toward reading and other educational skills far too early. Public school (and the training for the newest crop of teachers) has focused on a "pour the info in and have them spit out the answers on a test" instead of education being about a well-rounded person who has knowledge, but knows HOW TO THINK. (The last crop of freshman I taught made it abundantly clear that critical thinking and facts about subjects like geography or the appreciating of art or music is really slipping, due to the educational track we've been on in recent years.
Here's some words from an education activist from our area-
"In 2000 when Governor Owens pushed SB186, and then again in 2002 when Bush passed the No Child Left Behind Act, I recognized that the purpose of our public schools was changing from serving children to reporting to the state. Over the last decade I have struggled against a paradigm that defers the responsibility of our children to artificial measurement tools (CSAP) and generalized school labels (SARs). Last year, after a new governor and democratic majority, I felt myself still shouting to the mountain tops. I felt exhausted and hopeless and I wasn’t sure how to continue to do the important work for children. So rather than turning blue in the face and wasting my breath, I began instead to whisper into the wind. It was as if I quit fighting the bully on the playground and I quit hiding too. I responded only, "you will not define my struggle and I will not be used as a vessel for battle." Then I ran off to share the good news with the others. I have discovered that place of peaceful resistance Dr. Martin Luther King described. This seems to have made all of the difference in my activism. I have found other whisperers too, and our voices are being carried even to the tops of those mountains..."
BE YOURSELF. LET YOUR CHILD DEVELOP INTO HIS OR HER SELF. If you love music, play music at home. By child's musical instruments. Read him/her books about musical themes. Dance with your baby. Take your baby to live concerts in the park, even if it's just for a little bit at a time and you have to sit far away from the music because of the volume. Decorate with music-oriented decorations. Buy animals/dolls that play music. And at least wait until the child is old enough for something like Suzuki violin lessons (age 5 or 6) before you start classes of any kind.
The beginning of life is the beginning of learning. What track are we putting our kids on?
My take on it...