Moving with Kids Tips

I was a Navy wife for 22 years, 15 of them with children. I've moved across the country, up and down the Eastern seaboard and back across the country with children. These are some of the things that I learned.

1. Let the kids color on their own boxes. That way they can track them on and off the moving van.
2. If possible, pack toys in many different boxes. That way, when unpacking the kitchen or the other room, you will come across another toy. The appearance of new toys makes the unpacking process rather like a treasure hunt for the kids.
3. Make a 'first night' box with towels, bed linens AND pillows. Make it easy to spot the box (or boxes) and then keep track of it when it comes into the new house. (I always put my 'first night' boxes into the bathtub.) This way you can shower and set up beds on the first night.
4. Make the kids a book called "My Old House, My New House." I used those simple 4x6 photo albums that you can get at the dollar store, photos and index cards. I took pictures of important things in our current house (kids' rooms, play areas, favorite climbing trees, kitchen table, etc) and favorite spots around town. If possible, I'd get pictures of the corresponding places in the new home/town.
Then I'd arrange the book so that the left hand side had pictures of the current house and the right hand side had pictures of the new house. Sometimes I'd add words, sometimes I wouldn't. Either way, we would 'read' the book together: "In my old house, my room had one big window. In my new house, my room still has one big window -- but the walls are white instead of blue!" The kids had free access to this book and they'd often sit and just look at it.
If you can't get pictures of the new stuff, don't sweat it. I would stick in blank index cards. When my children and I would read the book, I'd ask them things like, "In my old house, my room had one big window. In my new house, what do you think my room will look like?" Then we would draw pictures. (If you know some features of the room but have no photos, do the same idea but incorporate the known information.)
5. Remember that God has chosen the perfect house for you. Remind your children about this too. My books usually closed with, "It is sad to leave out old house. It is exciting to get to our new house. But it's wonderful to know that God is at both houses."
6. Relieve the pressure on yourself by 'surrendering' your kitchen early in the process. Once the boxes appeared, I never felt like cooking -- and I never felt like cooking again until they were pretty much gone. At first, I fought this. By the end of the 22 years, I packed my kitchen first, unpacked it last and enjoyed restaurant dining in between.
7.Last, but perhaps most improtant, mark the box with the coffee pot. Woman can live without cooking but not without coffee.

I.

Just make the kids part of the experience. Let them help how ever they can. Even if it just putting their toys in the toys boxes. We moved twice while our kids were small, 3&1 then 5&3. Let them help set up their rooms make it an adventure then they will actually enjoy the move and it won't be so hard on them. Really hype the move before it happens. Also the first thing you need to do is move in all the beds and make them. You will be tired at the end of the day and last thing you'll want to do is make the bed.

Find all the really cool parks in your new area, visit several times before your actual move - go during the day when other stay at home moms will be there - start to talk about play groups aswell as other outings near by that are safe and fun for your family. Bring a familiar playmate along on one of the visits.
Take a plant or something from your current suroundings that you and your children can plant our intergrate in your new surroundings, your children should decide what that will be...

Be excited and adventurous with them.

Hi L.,
Some great advice from the moms here! My kids are also very much creatures of habit and when I was transferred for work about 2 years ago, we had to move to a new town about 3 hours from our old one. While we were waiting for our old house to sell, we lived in an apartment in the new town and then about 5 months later, moved into our new house. Lots and lots of moving and packing. But actually, since my kids are big into their daily habits and rituals, it worked out fine. I just tried very hard to make sure that we stuck with the routine - getting up at the same time, eating the same stuff for breakfast, naps at the right times, bathtime, bedtime stories, you name it. That is all stuff that you can control when you are moving (vs. whether or not the moving van will arrive on time, which, let's face it, is not really under your control!)

I just sat my older daughter down (she was the only one old enough to understand) and told her that we were moving from Walnut Creek to Fresno, and even though it was going to be different, it would be okay because Mommy and Daddy and Baby Sister would all be there, just the same as always. And that we would all drive there together in the car, and we would make sure to take all of her precious belongings with us in the car.

That seemed to do the trick - young kids don't seem to mind where they live, as long as their family is there like always. To them it's a big adventure! (And to us, it is an ulcer-inducing very stressful event!)

Good luck with your move!

I let the kids pack their own room with our help and the rest of the house I did when dad took them out on outings and woke early in the morning or stayed up late at night.
We also let our kids pack one box with their toys they wanted
to open first in their new house. It helped them keep their lovies close by and while it took a long time for them to decide what was going to go into the box (at first it was every toy till the box was overflowing) they felt more assured their special toys were not going to get lost in the boxes. Helps when you move that you have their special boxes to play with right away.
A huge help was a portable dvd player to watch anywhere when we had to empty the whole house.
Oh, and we saved our tent and sleeping bags, slept in them on our last night in our old house and it was where we slept the first couple of nights in our new place which took the pressure off of us getting beds and sheets set out.
It's hard moving but do-able.
Good luck!

Talk positive about how it will affect ur lives, Act happy and excited. Ask them how they are feeling abou tit, let them voice their concerns/ excitmeants, try to make it a converstion about how there feeling about the move. Ask them what one reason is why there happy to move, and discuss it with them, then ask them what is one concern they might have about moving, u know, is there anything that you are not likeing bout moving to Bla bla bla... Then talk with them about their concerns, and then end on a positive note. Although th e2 yesr old might not get this, but u can say honey r u excited that we get to move to a new pretty house? or any poistives about moving like more space in the house, u can say little tommy LOL, are you happy we get to move to a realy cool house? Do u know why moving is a happy thing? Because u can have lots of room to play with all ur toys, or if he area is filled with nice people, u can say when we move, there will be lots of boys and girls who are very nice who are soo happy they get to play with you, when we move, we can have all the nice new friends over and play in the nice backyard, or you can show them what a cool room you have! also speaking about room, If you are planing on decorating it, talk about all the cool things you will get to put in ur new room. Let them pick out a couple deco's to put in their room, and help them with major influence on ur part decide where tp put them at. They feel like a big part of their new house. Maby show them pics' of the house so it wont be soo new to them. When you do move, try as best as possible to fall right into ur old shedual, and don't get upset at them If there a bit more fussy, or clingy. Even the slighest changes can make a huge differance in a childs mind. They may act out because there confused, or sad, or scared and may not exactly know how to tell you. Just be as loving and understanding as possible. Make something really excitng about here new house when they get there, and somethings famillar b4 they walk in if you can help it. Then say look there is the "piano" in our new home, it likes its new home. Or if you have an animal, put the animal inside first, then let the boys find it, or even there fav. toy or bear. Say Mr bear loves his new home here. Make it eay as possible.

HI- we moved a year ago with kids the same age- pack their room last so it can stay familiar as long as possible and unpack their rooms first once you are in your new home. If you can spend some time in your new neighborhood before the move it would be helpful for them to see where your new park, library, grocery store will be so they can visualize it beofre the actual move. Hope that helps, L.

Since you are only moving an hour away, it sounds like you will be moving yourself i.e., no moving company. Either way, you really need to reach out and find someone to take care of the kids while you pack, load and unpack the stuff you will need to "run" your house again. The key will be to pack smart. Unfortunately, packing smart comes with many moves. I could give you tons of advice on moving that will help, but the number one thing is get care for your children. I'm sure your church would be more than happy to assist you with this. After all, it's only an hour away - should be very easy to get the kids back and forth with no problem. If you can't find anyone - splurge and find a Nanny Service. No matter what your feelings are about nannies, I can assure you that you will have a very qualified, tested, back-round checked person come to your aid - and worth every penny. Moving is hectic enough don't add the stress of trying to entertain your children while in the process.

Hi L.,
Good luck with all the work. I know it is stressful. When I was little my family moved several times. I want to share a few things my mom did to make it easier.
First of all, she was very clear that moving was not the time to purge all of the kids toys. It is very easy when packing and unpacking to take the opportunity to clear things out - but with so much changing for the kids already she felt it was important to keep as much the same and familiar as possible.
Second, she always did her best to keep to whatever routines she could. In the chaos of a move it's hard to find structure, but we could always count on regular meal times, regular bed time (with the regular routine of stories etc).
Third, she always tried to create a feeling of home right away in the new house. It takes a long time to unpack and get settled, but a few little touches make a difference. The things I remember are a kitchen table with a table cloth on it and a basket of fruit (even when everything else was still in boxes)and a bed with my favorite stuffed animal on it. Pick a couple of things that are important to your home and set them up right away.
Make sure they get a chance to say good bye and try to convey excitement about new places and experiences. Let them participate as much as possible in setting up their rooms.

Good luck!
-C.

get a POD container if you can. It's a big storage container that they drop off at your house. You fill it with all your stuff and then call them and they will either deliver it to your new place or store it for you if you need some more time. This makes it super easy to move because your doing it on your schedule insted of rushing to get everything loaded into a truck in one day, and you don't have to worry about movers taking your stuff. I just moved with a 5 month old and no baby sitter. If we hadn't gotten the POD I don't know what we would have done.

Hi L.,

We moved a couple of years back and I had the same worries as you have. However, all the worring went away because I realized that my children adjusted better than I. Less worring and more positive energies is what any family needs in a time of move. I realized that change is good for them once in awhile. Hope I helped a little.

Due to a series of unfortunate events, one being that our home was destroyed by fire, my family and I have just moved for the third time in the last 6 months. I often wonder how all this moving effects my 3 year old daughter. And to my surprise, I have witnessed that children of this age are very resiliant to what we adults see as often very traumatic. I think that children don't hold onto all the "emotional bagage" that comes with leaving memories and familiarity behind. They see it as a new adventure. My advice would be to keep them aware of the whole process. Answer all their questions and safely let them explore their new home. Also, let them carry something that they are close to, like a stuffed animal, or blanket, so they can feel more comfortable. Good Luck!

Hey L., I am retired military. 27 years service. I have moved 3 times since retiring always to a bigger house. I don't mind moving and have moved with 3 kids over the course of my life at various ages. The key to a smooth move is organization. Don't get overwhelm. I don't know if you are packing yourself out. I don't recommend it. Too much work and it has been my experience that you don't save that much money for the effort. But if you are, get somebody to babysit the kids while you pack. You need to focus and pack each room. Mark boxes cleary so when you get to the new location, you can easily identify where every thing goes. If you have packers, watch them like a hawk. Make sure they use enough packing material to minimize breakage and pack according to rooms. Don't let them mix stuff up in the boxes. It is easier to unpack the boxes at the new location. When you get to the other end, don't try to do all the unpacking all at once. Pace yourself. Again, get help especially with the kids. As far as getting around the new location, finding services etc. do a recon. In other words, check out ahead of time the new location and try to identify some of your services especially ones you will need right away before you move. You said it was only one hour away, so you could take a trip and learn ahead of time where the supermarket is, your Doctor, etc so when you move at least you will have that info at your fingertip. I think I will stop here. It could be a long note and I am sure others will respond. D.

We're getting ready to move also. Some of the things we're doing to get our almost-5-yr-old ready is to remind him of the benefits of the house when we move (a new back yard, a new Lightning McQueen bed, etc). We're also taking him with us whenever we house-shop, so he can feel a part of the process.

The biggest thing to remember, esp for your 2-yr-old is to just try to keep as many of your routines the same - before, during and after the move. And also try to visit some of their old friends, so they don't feel like there's too much they're giving up right away - at least until they settle in and start to make more friends.

There is a Berenstein's Bear book about moving that may help the kids. Also, when we moved, it helped to have healthy snacks available in an ice chest during the process so that if the kids get hungry, you don't have to stop everything and go get them something.

Good luck to you.

I just moved with my 10 and 3 year old with great success. There are a couple of valuable keys to success that worked for me - (1) keep their room(s) as similar in set up as possible. Maybe paint & deorate similarly, or with the 4 year old, it might be time for him to help decorate the room the way he wants! (2) Keep toys available for play, and invest in 1 or 2 new ones that will be just for moving day; (3) Talk about it their feelings, what they can look forward to; (4) assure that you'll stay in touch with close friends, so there won't be a sense of loss for your older child. (5) Allow the children to help! They can lift light things, put un-breakable items in drawers, cabinets, etc - but remember a child's attention span is about 1 minute per year, so you may not get more than 4-6 min effort from either of them on any one thing! (6) Boxes make GREAT toys! Popping Bubble wrap, too - but be careful of bubble wrap away from your younger child's face; my 3 year old loves to stomp on the bubbles & hear them pop. (7) Finally - unpacking probablly will take longer than it did before (4 months later & I've still got boxes to unpack!). The children will need many breaks from the chaos, as will you. Let the Peace of God guide you in all that you do. Have a wonderful adventure!

Hi L.!

Oh! Moving is so hard with kids, no matter how exciting it is! My suggestion is to prepare 2 boxes to stay at each home throughout the whole move. Each box should have bowls, spoons, sippy cups, plastic cups, clean dish towel, toilet paper, Motrin, snacks, juice boxes, etc.....and more!

Basically, to make YOUR LIFE easier during the move, you need to have all the necessary items in a perfect box for you ready when you need it. That way, you won't be saying..."hold on, honey, Mommy will get that in just a moment, I'm still trying to find your favorite cup". You'll be able to tend to your kids easier, and it won't be as stressful. It WILL be stressful and maybe chaotic, but not as much if you're organized and prepared.

As far your kids being "creatures of habit"...kudos to you for establishing a routine that they fell into. You will be able to do it again at your new house. It won't take long. It will take you longer to make a decision on what the best "kitchen setup" is, then your kids adjusting to a new house :o) Don't worry, it will all fall into place.

Just be ready for everything! Like you would for camping/hotels, etc... you'll be fine, and so will they.

Oh yeah....all beds first! My mom always taught me to remember that. She said no matter what, put all beds up with clean sheets. That way, no matter how tired we are, we will sleep good in our new house! I remember her doing that for us as kids. I actually appreciated it as a kid, so it must be a good tip!

Congratulations on your new home!

:o) N.

Hi L., We moved when our daughter was 5 and our son almost 2. It was in the same town but still was surprising difficult. If there is any way you can do something with the kids while your house is being packed up I suggest that. If you don't have movers I would also suggest that you consider that as an option since it will be very challenging to pack and move with the little kids to tend to as well. From an emotional standpoint be sure the kids get to say good-bye to their own room and help welcome them to their new room.
When we moved I was super concerned about how my 5 year old would take it and thought my little one wouldn't really get it. I was completely wrong. When he came to the new house and saw his stuff in the new room he was fine but then said, "okay, let's go home now." I had never thought to prepare him as well!
Lots to think about, I know. It will be a challenge but stay open with them and try as best you can to either enlist their help or take them out of the actual packing & moving situation.

i went through that about 3 years ago. what i did was find some plces around where we were moving that i knew my kids would love to do and i also got them into the local sports that were going on. now it did take a few weeks for them to adjust but like i said it has been a little over 3 years and they are doing great.
S. p.

L., I think you are asking about the moving process and that is like a long road trip with children, where new lovies, old lovies, treats, extra hugs, a special toy, drawing a map from and to.get some books from the new library about moving, about towns, about people and their jobs in the new town and perhaps a little journal for him to draw his emotions/tell his/her story each day so about the move, even when it is hard, acknowledging that it is a little scary and exciting ..Also, you staying calm, which I am sure you will with the Holy Spirit guiding your move, will help ease the transition..
Where are you moving to? When we moved (at the time our son was 2, which is easier than with two children as we have now like you) I felt some of the same uneasiness you mention.
The very first and most beneficial thing I did was call churches for mothers groups, church times, homeschoolers (even if you do not homeschool, these are moms home during the day and available) and I found Doctors, pediatricians, preschool, drycleaning, etc...I eventually picked my own through the lists but I met other moms who shared my values and I did not feel alone in our new town. It was great for my son because we met at the church each week to play and my husband met other husbands through me.

It will take time to settle in.

I moved when my son was 3 1/2 and then we just moved again last summer when he was 8 and my daughter was 3. It helped to not talk about the move until we started to move stuff around. They get too stressed at that age with the idea that things are going to change, but unsure of exactly how since nothing has changed yet. We also did their rooms last and let them help. The kids got to decorate the boxes for their rooms any way they wanted (which also occupied them while my husband and I were busy!). It actually did help them to see their toys go into boxes and onto the truck and then back off the truck again at the new house (and of course, set up their rooms first). I feel if they hadn't seen that they would have been afraid that "their stuff" was gone. Once a room is empty, but not cleaned yet, it is a terrific rumpus room! Let the kids have a ball with it. Leave some toys there to play with - balls or something you wouldn't normally let them have in that room (obviously still safe and won't break windows). My one other tidbit of advise - moving is hard on everyone! Even though your kitchen won't be set up immediately, have family meals! Even if it means McDonalds - the key is that you should all sit down together. This is when you will notice if the kids are apprehensive and you can address their concerns. Good luck! :)

Hi there I'm a mom of 3 boys who has recently moved. First off, always be sure not to leave there toys and things unpacked otherwise they worry they won't be moving. Do set aside toys for them to continue to play with. I gave each of them a back pack and said fill it with whatever. Moving day my husband stayed behind at the old house to observe the movers and I waited at the new house with the kids. Then once the movers showed up me and the boys played in the backyard and took a trip to McDonalds for ice cream so we weren't in the movers way. My husband delt with the movers and I delt with the kiddies. It worked out fine.

Hi. Don't worry too much about it. Kids are so adaptable at that age. When my kids were 4 and 2 we had a big move. It was my 8th move within 10 years so I knew how to mentally prepare for it. Some things I did were: I didn't throw out any of their toys; I felt that since they were giving up so much from their old home, their old toys might give them some comfort as they adjust. (Then I weeded them out after the kids had the fun of unpacking their toys). We also didn't have childcare available, so my husband and I did tag-team work clearing out of our old house. We bought some music CD's featuring the voices of their favorite TV characters. The cheerful music kept the kids' spirits up while my husband and I fretted about the work of setting up the new home. I tried to keep their bedtime routine the same, with a little extra cuddling time. The kids did feel stress that they vented onto me, but it only lasted a couple of days and then they were entirely adjusted. For me, it was harder to adjust after losing the support network in my old community. I spent a lot of time outside the house, taking the kids out for breakfast AND dinner at restaraunts or at Target's food court. We met many friendly people while eating out, and while exploring the parks. It took me longer to set up the house, but it feels so much better to be out there among other people instead of alone in the house with the kids. I'm not giving you advice, just telling you how I coped. For me, the emotional upheaval was worth more attention than the logistics. My kids love to talk about their old home, and when we have the chance, we drive through the area. They love that -- and they love their new neighborhood too. We whine about chain stores and chain restaraunts, but when we were moving cross-country I appreciated the sense of belonging I got from their familiarity. Long live Target.

Focus on as much rythym and routine as quickly as possible that includes the closest park ect.Get one room in order asap and keep it that way - no boxes in that one if possible.

Add a treat thing into the routine - so it's a high light of the day not a 'bribe' - but something that gives everyone a lift as a family - build it in. Keep the bed time stories the same ect

Make 'nests' in the beds or on the floor for fun and comfort - I used this a lot when my kids were little to give me some work time or just some extra rest.

Good Luck,

R.

Mark things very carefully and set up their rooms completely as soon as you walk in. They should be able to sleep in their own bed with their sheets, comforters, toys, etc the first night. If you have special drapes in their room make sure you put them up too, as well as any night light they are used to. Read the same books to them. Keep that night routine going immediately. Good luck on your move.

My nearly 3 y. old son was NOT HAPPY about our move - even though we had been driving out to see the model home and watch our house be built. He told us he wanted to go home for about 6 weeks. I put off getting his big boy bed etc. & set up his crib in the same layout as our old apartment and even taped up his ugly old curtains - brought along his airr purifier & bath toys etc. He was freaked out anyway.
The biggest mistake we made was - we should have hooked up the TV & DVD before anything else. He was ready to run away to Grandma's when he found out he couldn't watch TV the first few nights. He actually sat on the stairs and wouldn't talk to us.
Get a babysitter while you move so your kids won't be in the way and possibly injure themelves trying to "help". Also - seeing their stuff go out the door and onto a truck will be upsetting.
Good luck - get some pizza coupons for a place that delivers!!
A.

Always remember, your kids really react to how you feel about things, so if you are happy and upbeat about whatever, they will be too.

Make the kids a part of the BIG ADVENTAURE. Pack thier room in small box's that they are able to care. Keep tese bos's in thier room so they can go get one to pack in the moving van. Talk about the move and let they take thier bos's and put them into thier own new room. Kids are a lot more flexible than we give them credit for.

God Bless and enjoy this new adventure with your kids
R.

Allow them to make a bag of things they want to have easy access to and let them place it in the car with you.

L.,

I would recommend that you keep some of the kids favorite things in the car with you or where you can get at them quickly when you arrive at the new place. Also, I would try to set up their room or a play area first things so that they will feel comfortable right away.

Enjoy your new home.

J.

Can you ask your Mom or someone you trust to help out, someone from your church? We moved when our two sons were 2 and 6 months. We moved about 30 minutes away to a new home. I packed sleeping needs, toys and food for the boys and deposited my mother with them at the new house. Then we went back and moved everything over a few trips in a big truck. The boys kept their schedules and got to watch the move unfold. Of course everyone was tired at the end but it worked pretty well. Good luck.

L., I have a family member that was in the military and moved a lot. One thing she did was to buy or make them a "special box" usually like a cigar box or so. This box was there very own and they could decorate it however they wanted. In that box was things that they treasured and it traveled inside the car or plane with them wherever they went. I remember visiting them after a move and the kids always had a smile on their face when they wanted to show me thier special box. I don't know if it was the treasure they loved so much or the idea that they had control of that one thing and that thier special things were kept in it. Don't know if that would help but it seemed to help my neices and nephews.

C. M.

I have been married almost 8 years to a wonderful man who is in the Air Force. We have moved 8 times and only one time we didn't have kids. I've noticed some things that helped my kids. When we tell them we are really excited and they catch on to that. Sometimes it may take one of them a little while to be excited, but they've all been really good about having a good attitude. Also, make sure that you keep a backpack with their special toys, stuffed animals, blankets or whatever they are attached to, for each of them. Sometimes it's scary for them to see these people pack up all of their things and they don't always understand that they will see them again in 1 - 2 weeks. In addition to the backpacks, I have always packed a suitecase with more of their toys and books in it. That way they have something to play with in the new house or hotel while you are waiting for the movers. Good luck and happy moving!

Have the kids seen the new house much? Maybe let them pick out wich room they want, might be easier for the 4 yr old to do this but it could help them feel it's 'their's.' Also try to find some books about moving so you can read them to the kids. Usbourne Books makes great books about these sorts of events. Have them help w/the packing as much as possible, especially w/their own stuff & then let them help unpack as much as possible & set up their toys, books & rooms. While it may be kinda hard to have the kids w/you the whole process it might make them understand better to see one house get packed up & then see everything get unpacked & set up in the new house. Good luck!

HI L.!! I think I have some sound advice for you??? LOL I have 6 children and I am 30 yrs also...we have moved 3 times in three years....The best thing I can tell you is to find activities for them while you are packing....pack as much as you can at the house while your husband moves things back and fourth....I swear moving is the most stressful event especially as husband and wife.....I think satan sneaks in and makes it even worse....Find the joy in it....change is good.....your security is in the Lord ...not your home...I also noticed the hardest part of moving is the JUNK DRAWERS...ahhh!! Stay as organized as you can and dont set unrealistic expectations......put the kiddos to bed and do most of your packing at night....its hard Girl!! But stay in prayer and BLARE your WORSHIP music!!! HAHA Satan hates that.....cant seem to argue when the worship musics on.....LOL Hope this helps!! OH!!! THE MOST IMPORTANT PART!!! Make sure your husband puts the childrens rooms together FIRST!!!! They are so tired after the move and you still have a hundred thousand things to do...so definatley putting them to bed with all their comfortable things makes the adjustment sooo much easier!! I'll be prayin for ya!