Making a Road Trip More Enjoyable

I am a 56 yr old g-ma keeping a 20 mth old grandson. As g-mas we are experienced and maybe a bit more relaxed. Don't sweat the small stuff. If he is quiet watching the video, for goodness sake, let him watch it. It isn't going to warp him!

We travel alot because of my job and I have found that the magna doodles are wonderful!!! They come in travel sizes. Our kids love those.:) We also have the dvd players. Also, toys that make noise and are interactive and generally pretty good. Other than that make frequent stops to let him stretch out his legs. Like every few hours. Sure it will make the trip a little longer but it will be much more enjoyable for you both. Hope this helps.

Your 20 month old my be just to young for that long of a trip. We had to drive from NC to Alaska when my olest and at the time only child was 3 1/2. That was hard enough. You may want your Mom to come visit you.

When we take road trips with our daughter we make sure we have time to stop more frequently to get out and stretch and walk around. This was great for stimulating the mind of a young one also. We also pick routes that are more scenic and point out things we see along the way.
Good fruits and food to munch on. Singing songs we both new. A good friend of mine told me about Raffi. He is a great kids singer, and it really helps. We all enjoy the songs he sings, so we are all able to laugh and have fun with it.
I think if want to be able to enjoy travel with your children, you probably want to continue the learning with them. I don't think dvd's are the enemy in certain situations. Choose wisely, they are more educational than they used to be.
good luck,

I make at least one long trip a month with one who has always loved car trips and one who absolutely hates them. It was hard at first but my parents are elderly and I need to go visit frequently to check in on them. I make sure the car is always filled up when I leave and leave around nap time. When the cranky one wakes up I wait until she's really upset and then stop and either eat or just get out and walk at a rest area. We always plan stops at least every two hours and do not stop before then. During driving time we sing, talk, watch movies, and sometimes the little one just needs to cry. I just ignore it and put on soothing music and she'll typically quiet down very quickly. Take that trip. Remember, they are kids and will do anything to get their way. Your job is to guide them into being the best they can be without giving into their every whim. Be strong and have a nice trip!

My husband and I personally let our kids watch movies in the van as we travel. We travel between SC and PA regularly which is 11 hours in the van. All three of my children (including my 2 yr old) understand that this much movie time is "special" and that once we get to our destination, the treat is over. It also seems that there is a natural progression away from tv once we get to Grandma's since they just had so much of it. We also have times in between the movies in which we take breaks from movies and play a car game or if it gets to be close to "bedtime", we turn off the tv's and they will all go to sleep. Tantrums in the car are worse than at home as they cause distraction to the driver. I don't feel as if I am doing permanent damage to my children for allowing this extra tv time and in turn, getting a more enjoyable, long trip in the van. Good Luck!

I know that most people might not agree with this, but i think that visiting your mom is much more important than how long your son is watching the videos for one trip. I totally understand your not wanting him to spend that much time doing it, but you could put some of his favorite toys in the car too for him to play with while the videos are running. We had the same issue and I did stop my daughter from watching videos every time we got into the car, but it was a long hard process. One thing that helped TREMENDOUSLY was the CD's from the Baby Einstein collection that play cute music from the videos. Another thing, once your second child comes along, your oldest will probably pay attention to him/her instead of doing anything else. We now sing in the car together and my oldest helps to calm my 17 month old by making her laugh, etc. Good luck w/whatever you decide to do but i strongly suggest making the trip to visit your mom no matter how much video time your son gets temporarily b/c i know she would LOVE the bonding time with him and you!

The last long trip we took was to NJ and back. I bought ahead of time some new activities, coloring books, and even a movie. I was very surprised what a good traveler Samantha was. One trick for us was packing up and getting completely ready the night before, going to bed early, and leaving the house around 4 am (so the first part of the trip, Samantha was asleep). When she woke up, we stopped for breakfast and opened her bag of goodies. Check out stores like The School Box -- you can get educational travel toys. If all else fails, the videos are better than losing your mind and your patience. At 20 months old, your son may be having a battle of wills with you. I completely agree that you need to be the one who wins most of the time but driving 10 hours with a temper tantrum is no fun! ('course, I doubt it would last that long...) Good luck and have fun in Florida!

If it is at all possible, consider taking someone with you. Even a five hour car trip with a child who is fussy can be exhausting, not to mention dangerous. (I'm speaking from experience.) If that's not possible, give in and let him have the movie. Your safety and well being (not being distracted from the road) is far more important. Also, give yourself plenty of time to get there, figure in time for rest stops so you can get some fresh air and stretch your legs. And even if you let him have the movie for the whole trip, believe me, we will lose interest. I've had a lot of success with Leap Pad (or Leap Frog) products. He can read stories to himself (the book reads them out loud) or do different activities. Also, you could bring a CD of nursery rhymes, my daughter always got a kick out of the fact that I couldn't clap along to B-I-N-G-O. The idea is to have a number of activies available, and everything I just mentioned can be found at Wal-Mart, K-Mart, Target, Toy's R Us, any "big box" store. The novelty of something new is very helpful, just make sure it is an activity simple enough that he doesn't need your help to operate it. Remember that nothing is going to keep his interest as long as it normally would because his ability to move is restricted. If all else fails, and you don't think you'll be able to keep him entertained, consider driving at night while he sleeps. You might be shocked at what a small child will resort to when confined in a car seat for ten solid hours. I've had my daughter everywhere from Texas to to New York, from Florida to Canada. No matter how guilty you may feel about too much TV, nothing is more important than getting there safely. You can always return to being SuperMom once you reach your destination. Good luck!

Leave the movie on for his enjoyment and your own sanity. It's only 2 days (one day down, the other on the return). A magnetic doodle pad has been a great accessory for my 2 year old on short trips, but I have to resort to playing a movie on my drive to Florida, too.

I would agree with Krista on this one. We have done many 20 hour drives, with one who travels well, and one who has a very hard time. We don't put up with the behavior either. I find the harder you try to please them, usually the more they start demanding. They know you are in a situation where you don't want them screaming, and some will use it! We just plan lots of singing time, games (even if it's just peek-a-boo. We do treats off and on (avoiding too much in the sugar or that just creats more problems) and if they start throwing a fit, we completely ignore them. They may scream for up to 30 minutes, but trust me, it won't last forever. The more often you start doing this now, the better the long trip will be. He'll catch on after a few shorter trips. Another thing I think really helped was keeping their schedule as much the same. We made sure to eat meals the same time they usually do, even if it means eating it in the car so we don't have to stop, and not letting them doze off until it's their regular nap time. Once that nap time hits, we turn off everything (unless it's calming music) and don't talk in the front seat either. If they start to ask for stuff, we just keep saying "night-night" which is what our kids know for sleep time. It may take a while, but it's worked for all three of ours so far. Good luck! Persistance is the key, and remember who the parent is!

I just read your problem. does he like to play with stuffed toys, another would be to get the cds for kids and sing along with him,or you could stop and have a picknic by a pond and play some games with him .
but you are right he does not need to watch tv..
I hope i have been able to help you..

Hi A.,

I find road trips easier to tolerate at night. Start the trip at 6ish, turn the movie on, stop for dinner and one last bio break then drive for the remainder of the night.

G.

Travel at night while he sleeps normally. YOU will appreciate teh quiet and he the sleep.

Also TV for one so small for this situation, I personally don't feel it will "hurt".

what about music CD's of childrens songs and things liek that? Or some special toys, he normally does not play with.

Frequent stops to allow him to run will also help break up the trip.

I went to Savannah with a 2.5 yr old, an 18month old, 10 yr old and 12 yr old. and it was the older kids who "whined" the most. It CAN be done, but I would do most at night.

Just my .02
Hope it helps,
B.
deaffmommie

It's hard to be so little and full of energy and then have to sit still in the car. Even short trips seem like an eternity because your little one has little concept of time. IN addition to that, I don't know about you, but to me car seats, even the best of them, don't look like much fun to travel in for long distances. They are very restrictive and we want them that way to keep our children safe. Still, can you imagine sitting for 10 hours in one?

Let's start with the short trips first. What does your child enjoy when he is at home? Does he like to sing to a certain tape? Does he particularly love a certain toy? I think you could use some of the things that he likes to develop some fun things that you only do when you are in the car with him. You could say, hey little Sam, guess what? When we drive in the car the next time we are going to sing together! Or you get to play with this cool toy the whole trip! Also, while some movies might be mindless, there are plenty that are not. Think of the car time as learning time and find videos that will help you make that happen.

Here is what we do on long car trips. 1) Set a travel time limit per day. This is based on the length of the trip, your child's regular nap times, your child's age and ability to sit still. When we stop for the night we make sure there is a pool (indoor or outdoor, dependent on the weather) and we swim with the kids til they are worn out. They get a good night's sleep which makes the next day's travel better. 2) Each day, we stop frequently. We have three children and we take a piece of sidewalk chalk and mark their first initial on the front tire. When we stop, whoever has their initial closest to the road, gets a prize from the prize bag, gets to pick where they sit in the car or gets a $1 for spending money for the trip - you get the idea. You will have to tailor this to your circumstances. Since you have one child, instead of initials you could put M for movie, V for video, B for book, T for toy, S for snack and so on and then whenever your child gets fussy, you can stop asap and say hey look what the tire says! Now you can have a movie! 3) If you are driving with two adults in the car, the one not driving can sit in the back with the child and play with him, read to him, sing with him, etc. 4) Let your child help you pack a special backpack with special things that he would like on the long trip. 5) When your child is doing well in the car, be sure and praise him. Often times we forget to do this. :-)
Hope this helps, S.

When I was growing up, my family always lived far away from grandparents. Almost every summer we would pile in our Suburban (Mom, Dad, and six kids) and drive 36 hours to see Grandma and Grandpa. There were no such thing as TVs in cars back then. We did a lot of singing, talking, and telling stories. As we got older, we played car bingo, road sign alphabet search games, etc.
You may want to see if the library has music CDs or books on CD/tape for toddlers. I know the idea of singing Barney songs for 10 hours straight may not appeal to you, but it may help your child enjoy the ride. (See if he will dance along in his car seat, even if it is to music you enjoy, and try to be as silly as possible.) Try to get your child interested in what is outside the car (forwards, not sideways, so he doesn't get car sick). Since you are expecting, you should take regular get-out-and-stretch breaks. Perhaps you could give him some type of reward (toy, treat, run around time, plenty of praise) at each stop.
Before you go, you could line up your kitchen chairs to look like a "car" and practice for your long trip. Be sure to go over the rules and expectations, especially about the TV and tantrums. Make it a game and let him have a turn being the "driver." You could even pretend you are the toddler in the back that he has to take care of. He may well scream for the first while, but I think he will settle into the ride after that. He will probably even surprise you (and him) by falling asleep for part of the time. Be sure to keep him hydrated during the trip.
We took a trip to Tennessee from Georgia last summer. It was about 5 hours in the car. I was really nervous to take our children (ages 10, 8, 6, 4, and 3 months [nursing infant]) in the car for that long. I prepared for every contingency I could think of and prayed a lot, and fortunately it went much better than I had feared.
Try to take toys/books he has never seen before (Dollar Store, Thrift store) as well as old favorites. Only give him one toy at a time and realize that when he is tired of a toy or book it may well mean that he is restless and tired of toys and books in general and not just that one. Then you could try giving him a snack and see how long you can stretch that out. Then do music, then a story, then a song, then talk about things outside the car, then a book, then a rest stop, then back to another toy, or something like that. You could set a timer and not switch activites until it goes off. That will give him something to look forward to. I think the trick is to only let him do one thing at a time and drag each thing out as long as possible. Make him work for each activity/toy/snack (by being good) so he sees it as a privilege and not something you are throwing at him to try to keep him quiet. Try things he hasn't explored before like a slinky toy or rubics cube or child-safe kitchen gadgets or even a small mirror. You could take a photo book for him to look at. Be sure he knows that there is something special at the end of the trip -- Grandma!!!
Sorry this is so long. I guess I'm just trying to say that you can make it work and I'm cheering for you. If you are up to the 10 hour drive to see your mom, go for it. Your son will adapt and probably do better than you expect. Good luck.

Our kids are a little bit older than yours, but I always check out several books on CD from the library before a road trip. This is enjoyable for the whole family and we don't fight about what to watch. I feel like books on CD make it ore of a fun family experience, whereas TV makes it feel like we are at home, and our kids seem to fight more when they watch instead of listen. This is easier the older they get, but I bet there would be some books your son might like to listen to.

I have some CD's that my 21 month old son loves. He really likes Jack Johnson, especially the Curious George soundtrack. My husband and I also try to make our road trips, short or long, around the time that he is supposed to take his naps. A friend of mine does the CD things too, and maybe just limit his TV time. One stretch of the trip and make sure that he knows this--and if he gets upset, try the music. :) Good luck. :)

Hi A.,
When I was a little girl I hated trips too. I was around six when my parents finally figured out my problem. I was motion sick. I didn't always throw up, I was just miserable the entire time. Maybe it's something as simple as that. I'm fifty-three now and still get motion sick. I can't even rock in our porch swing for very long before I'm uncomfortable and I definitely can't read in the car. That's the worse. Just a thought.

Ugh... you're talking about a 10 hour car trip with a toddler! Leave the TV on! I won't let mine watch TV in the car unless it's a long, long trip, but ours isn't built in so it's easier (and they're older). I also hate the idea of kids watching in the car for a 5 min. trip, so I'd try to stand firm on that... but for the long ride... I say do it.

I think the problem isn't with trying to make the trip more enjoyable for him. You need to find a way to be the parent and take control of your child's behavior. Behavior rules do not fly out the window because you are in the car. Let him know that his tantrums are unacceptable, just as they are unacceptable at home or in the store. I have a three year old, and am thankful that my husband laid down the law with her when she was 18 months old. We do not tolerate tantrums or whining, and there is no reason for you to, either! We drive from South Carolina to Oklahoma once a year (20 hour trip) with no problem. It's not about how fun you can make time in the car, it is about how well you discipline your son.

HI- I have 3 boys- ages 6, 5 and 15months..My first and my third HATE the car- throw temper tantrums, throw things, cry, etc....You just have to bear thru it- However, if you say the movie calms him down and keeps his attention, PLAY the movie girl!!! You need your sanity and focus while you are driving! I would do anything to have my little one be quiet in the car- but nothing soothes him - not even the TV- Don't worry about it being too much- if you regulate it all the other times in his life- doing this to get thru a road trip certainly isn't going to hurt anyone!My six year old finally starting tolerating car riding at about age 2. Make sure he has some sancks and a drink and play some fun CD's if you don't want the TV on the whole time- but if all else fails- I say turn it on if it works - you don't need any distractions while your driving!
Good Luck

I have a 6yr old and a 3 yr old , and before we had our dvd player in the car my 6 yr old then 18months loved coloring books so we had tons of them and the twistable crayons ( cant eat through the plastic). But it was still insane ( we drove cross country alabama- washington state). On the way back (washington - Maryland) we had a laptop that could play DVDs and we played a movie then she would play or sleep for an hr or 2 then play another movie. Now that we have the have the player actually IN the car, prob do play movies the whole way when we are on the road but they arent always watching it and I make sure they are watching something that has at least a little bit of educational value, TV isn't all bad it just depends on what you let them watch.From watching Dora the explorer my daughter was counting in Spanish before she turned 3. And knew all her shapes and colors and letters from watching Blue by then as well. Things like Nick Jr, Sprout , Noggin and Baby Einstine ( I cant spell lol ) are great.
Keep in mind also she prob wont be awake for the whole trip she will prob sleep some. When mine started the I want to watch so and so on the way to the store I just told them no we only use the TVs for long trips, got some resistance, but NO means NO. You just have to stick to your guns.

I wouldn't worry about it being too much TV at one time. Traveling is hard on everyone, but especially hard on a toddler who has a lot of energy and is used to expending it. I'm sure that on a 10 hour road trip he will eventually fall asleep, and if leaving the movie on is what it takes, then that's what I would do. Or you could get the videos with the kids' sing along songs, that might be a good break from a movie.

I am a mother of three children, and four
grandchildren.

The one thing I can tell you is that you
are the boss, not your child. Don't feed
bad behavior, correct it, or you will be
dealing with a baby teenager who will throw
a bigger fit than you will be able to deal
with. You gain respect by teaching them to
respect you. That means that they should not
have their way just because they don't get what
they want. Please don't fear your child, it
would be the biggest heartbreak of your life!

Praying for you,

S.

Hi A.,
Our last child had similar crying fits for a time. I changed our travel routine to help it. I left around 5 a.m. while he was still asleep; stopped around 8:00 a.m. for breakfast; stopped 2 hrs later to let him run around at the rest area; stopped 2 hours later at the first Wal-Mart in Florida to get some goldfish or some grapes and stretch his legs; it was customary that a new little toy was introduced at the onset of the long trip (so he'd have something speial forward to). A different toy or book was introduced every few hours, and the dvd supplemented the fun time. I never played into the tantrum. I ignored it some, and interjected at other times by saying, "we're going to have a fun trip, and we're not going to not be nice." Sometimes I would start to sing, and he's listen and other times he'd join in especially when I put in the "silly songs" cd from Wal-Mart and the Kidz Bop CD of children's favorites from Kmart. It worked great, so I'll hope you'll try them & let me know of your success. Be blessed. A

My husband and I took our boys, then 7 and 3 to Miami for a cruise. It was a 10 hour drive. We gave them "surprises" every 30 minutes to an hour. Sometimes it was a Hot Wheels car. Other times it was a coloring book and crayons. I believe one of our gifts was a movie, too. One movie won't hurt and it'll give you some peace too. You would have to be creative for a 20 month old. Also, we got our boys excited by counting down before the next surprise. They were really excited. Also, on another trip we played "travel bingo". I think a 20 month old is old enough to look for an ambulance or fire truck or airplane for BINGO! I think we got that at a Dollar General store for next to nothing! Good luck on your trip!

A.,
We travel quite a bit beings we are military. Our children are now 9 and 7, and it is always a challenge. We of course do the movie thing but we also keep a box/bag of new surprises for them. Every hr or so you can pull out something new for him. We do the crayola wonders mess free books too. I think now they even have finger painting. Play games in the car too, sing songs...you just have to be creative! But to make a light at the end of the tunnel I will say it does get a little easier:) Good Luck
Chas

I've taken several long trips (8-10 hrs) with our son, who is now about 2 1/2, but the trips started when he was about 4 months old. Some trips have been made with my husband and/or other family; some I made with just my son and myself (eek!). I, too, asked for advice on how to cope with the trip, and about 75% of people suggested a dvd player, but we don't watch TV at home, so I wasn't going to start it in the car. The few brave souls who agreed with me suggested a basket of toys-- some of his favorites, some new (or old but not used for a while). I kept a laundry basket of toys in the front seat with me, and gave him a new one every 1/2 hour or so. Truth be told, this worked really, really well on the first few trips, but as my son got older, he was happy to play or look at a book longer (or sing songs with me, or talk, or whatever) and used fewer and fewer toys-- now we just take a handful and he's happy. My son, too, is a good napper at home but doesn't seem to sleep well in the car, but this hasn't been a huge issue so far. Honestly, if you're really brave, you could try to "wean" him from the dvd player in the car-- the friends I know who have one say they wish they hadn't started it, because it's become sort of an addiction in the car. But I think having it and using it as a special treat or as a reward for a certain amount of good behavior in the car would probably work, too, without having to leave it on the whole time. Good luck!!

I wouldn't use the tv for short trips either because he would have a difficult time learning to entertain himself in the future. My second child hated to be restrained, so he did not travel well either. He would do the same things that you mentioned your little one does. Our first son would cry and scream for any trip that lasted over 30 minutes. Whenever possible, I would sit in the back seat and talk and play with him while my husband drove. We were able to take long trips this way. You might want to try different types of music as well. It helped with our first son- he loved classical and Russian praise music. However, it just made our second son even more angry. Bubbles usually work wonders, but have the passenger handle this one. If you have the a/c or heater on, just dip the wand and hold it in front of the fan. Good luck!

Leave the TV on!!! I don't let mine watch it unless we go for a least 1 hour. Get some new DVD's he hasn't seen before and save it for the trip. I break my trip up and spend the night half way. It makes things somewhat easier if the ride is that hard! Good luck!

roadtrips with toddlers is no easy abswer, i travel wiith mine at times, these are some ideas, i make a little snack bag for them with crackers, juice, etc. not alot of sugar, i let him be in charge when he eats it, sometimes the car will need vacuuming after, i also make a play bag with his back pak but putting some of his favorite small toys in it, something to draw, color on, we stop as needed, but we will make an exception, take a favorite light blanket and a sleep toy, point out the fun things on the way, let him be a little tired and fussy, we as adults get that way too. dvd is ok, but it doesn't replace just pure conversation with your child, do not expect him to be perfect, if u are pregnant i sorta feel frequant stops will be happening. hope you do well with the

How about if you play educational videos? Ones that include numbers, letters, shapes and colors. I know Seasame Street has some out, Mickey Mouse Club, etc. At least this way he'll be learning and not just wasting time watching t.v. Also make sure he has his favorites with him on the trip. A blanket, bear, toy, whatever. Take snacks he likes and juice. These make for a pleasant trip. My son is 2 and I've taken him to Florida, 9 hours and he did fine. He watched movies, he and his cousing tossed a ball, and he slept some. It was a pleasant trip. Good luck to you!