I would love to hear from other women who are married to men in recovery. I'm hoping to hear about your experience as your spouse has recovered. Were you married when your husband went into recovery? What was the hardest challenge for you and your relationship? Did you feel like you were on a roller coaster of emotions in the beginning? At what point did you start to feel better?
Thanks so much!
I dont have a husband in recovery. but I know addicts in recovery.
Alanon/Naranon will be chock full of women in circumstances similar to your own. Those friendships and support may prove invaluable over time.
Good luck!
Please get to an Al-Anon meeting, they are a huge help for friends and family members of addicts (recovering and active). Al-Anon is for you. It's a safe place where you can go to discuss your feelings and everyone there understand what you are going through.
I joined almost 4 years ago when my spouse was an active drinker. He found recovery about 3 years ago and Al-Anon was a huge help for me (it still is).
I don't have advice for you. I counseled men in recovery as well as their families and every person's journey is their own. I will say I hope you can go to Alanon meetings to connect with other family members.
My situation is just so different, as my husband was in recovery for 15 years when I met him.
I highly recommend you seek out an Alanon group. Our local AA district website includes information about Alanon, and you could probably find a group that way. A more comfortabel (less intimidating) option might be to talk to someone you know. Maybe someone from your church? If you do not go to church, maybe you know someone who does who could recomend a group?
When we moved here and got to know our pastor a bit, my husband approached him and let him know that he is a recovering alcoholic and that if anyone ever needed someone to talk to that they priest could give them his name and phone number. Our priest was very happy to hear that. Not sure anyone has ever called my husband because or the priest's referral, but that's not something my husband would necessarily share with me. He is very serious about keeping people's confidence. He does not share things with me!
I know it can seem less intimidating to ask a question here (That's great! That's what the website is here for!), but i really think you will benefit from finding an Alanon group.
My husband and i are both in recovery. That in itself can be a struggle, we make it work. I do know quite a few people in my local fellowship who have married a non addict and their spouses go to Al-Anon. i really think you should check it out.
many blessing to you :)
My late ex was in and out of recovery the entire eight years we were together. He lost one job after another due to his drinking, and burned through his retirement funds paying for one rehab program after another, only to relapse after each one. He almost drank us into foreclosure.
I finally told him during the fifth rehab program in three years that if he relapsed again, he would have to find another place to live. Six weeks after being released from inpatient, he got drunk, and I kicked him out of the house.
After several months of sleeping in homeless shelters, and being divorced, he finally figured out that he REALLY needed to get sober. When he died, he had just picked up his nine month chip, which was the longest he had ever been sober in the eight years I knew him.
