Looking for the Best Potty-training Method for Boys

It will happen, when the child is ready.

If not ready, the child will take FOREVER... to do it.
It is attained, in stages.
It is a process.
It ebbs and flows in stages.

I have a boy.

It also has to do with biological development and brain/bladder connections and myelin nerve sheath development.

My son potty trained instantly. As in we said no more diapers and he was out of them that day (and night) with only 2 accidents in 8 months - both of them oddly happening two weeks ago. No pull-ups, straight to unders. I barely call it training b/c we really had nothing to do with it other than ponying up cash for unders and some sticker rewards if it had to resort to that.

The secret? He was ready. Probably beyond ready! He was past 3 (38 months or so) and it was his teacher that told us to go ahead and get the big kid pants on him. She'd noticed he had the signs (that we clearly missed) and mentioned how he was going at school when his classmates did.

So, no drama. No method. No prolonged process or declaration from us that training had begun. Just on his own time.

Oh, and he started by going standing up b/c that is what they did at school. SO much easier, and no potty chair to lug around (he saw his best friend - a girl - sit on the big potty numerous times beforehand and wasn't anxious about balancing or whatever when it came time to poop there).

Wait, wait, then wait a little more. Diapers aren't forever and a potty battle is no way to enjoy your time together.

The rest of our daily interaction with him can be challenging so he was kind enough to at least make this easy!

I am almost done training my second child, a boy, and let me just say, he was much easier to train than his sister! In fact, I know many who have had an easier time of it with boys. So, first thing first, do not believe it will be harder because he is a boy. Second, potty training is directly correlated with parental motivation. What this means is that YOU BEING READY is just as important as the kid. This doesn't mean to ignore a readiness check-list, it just means that there are lots of things you can do to help in the learning process. I read books to my kids starting at 9 months. I also have a toy potty they play with in the bathroom with their stuffed animals. Both of my kids started peeing regularly at 18 months, daughter in undies and night trained at 21, son is 22 months and almost night trained.

The process of potty learning is a process. This means, (1) they have to learn how to control the muscles, (2) they have to learn timing (understanding sensations and then getting to the bathroom on time), and (3) they have to be willing to postpone immediate pleasure to go to the bathroom, i.e. 2 and 3 year old are so easily distracted, so overcoming distractions is it's own ballpark.

The most important things are to not show any negative emotion, to let the kid be in charge of the process, and to have fun. I like starting out naked and then putting them in trainers as soon as they have muscle control. I only encourage potting before going outside to play, before leaving the house, and before bed. The other times they are fully responsible.

Here's a wonderful, informative website you might find helpful. It gives a few variations on"readiness" checklists, plus tips on various training strategies, the best ages to start them, and the advantages and disadvantages of each approach: http://www.parentingscience.com/potty-training-tips.html

In the event you encounter any delays or problems, the approach described here seems very much in line with everything I've read about how kids tick: http://www.rogerknapp.com/medical/pottytrainingrefusals.htm

my boys were so much easier than my daughter. We potty trained at 18months, my poor son, he did great, we left his potty in the living room and let him go naked and watched him like crazy, once he got the idea we moved the potty into the bathroom and then started placing his seat on the big potty. No rewards other than lots of J. and praise, no drama, no pullups, just so carpet cleaner and time. I say poor boy though because he would spend the weekend at his dad's and he kept him in diapers, so every week we started back over, even so it never took more than a couple of days to get back on track, the boy was READY. my second son potty trained at about the same age but with much less fanfare, he just wanted to be like his big brother. (they're only 16 months apart in age).

At 2 1/2 I'd say, let him pick the potty, let him find a home for it, and if needed stickers are a great treat. Just make a chart to hang right by the potty and let him put up a sticker every time he goes.

and don't forget the other parts of potty training, like how and when to wipe, and that flushing and handwashing are part of the deal as well.

2.5 was too early for my son. More like 3 when we got better and he got better at it. Stickers didn't work for us. What worked was for me to put him in underwear and ask "Are you clean and dry?" and he'd get a prize/treat if he was. I'd ask every half hour or so. This way - he got a treat for saying 'clean and dry' and not for every 5 seconds that he went to the potty (that kid was getting full on treats!).

The way we finally got him trained was at age 3 yr 4 months when I was so sick of him going to poop in his underwear in his room that I just put him inunderwear one day and we went to run errands out in public. I reminded him about not peeing in the grocery store or library. We went before we left the house and a few times when we were out. He has had very few accidents since then, and never out in public except at the playground once.

good luck!

My son had to be trained to go to the preschool and I thought he would not be able to go. I used the book Potty training in a day. It was a very hard, long day but it worked. I was not even able to get dressed! You literally cannot take your eyes off the child.

Hi S. S. We started our boys at 20 months, we used rerward and discipline and by 21 months done, at age 2 my husband started teaching them how to stand up and pee. People will tell you boys are harder, not in my experience, I have potty trained many many toddlers over the past 14 years, andf I will tell you in my experience sucess or lack there of is more about the ones doing the training not the children. I don't believe in the children decideing when to potty train. I do believe in rewards and appropreit discipline, and I do bvelieve in starting early and having children trained by age 2 not after. My kids are 28, 25, 23 so im old school, we had less stress and complications back then than parents are having today, all because we did things differentlly. Once we started potty training NO DIAPERS it just confusses them, another problem parents have today is what they consider an accident and what really is an accident. No to be mean mommys but reading the responses, the children were in control, my husband and I decided before our children were even born no 2 year olds in diapers, Dana the term Potty rediness is something some parent made up, don't go by everything you read and see on here, in the familys who use this sight, a big part of these children are way behind and at 2 and over than my kids were and the children I was around when my kids were small, it's the methods being used, and that key method is parents are waiting for children to decide when they will do things instead of the parents setting rules and training the children to obey their parents. Sorry S. S. didn't mean to go on, just don't let people tell you boys are harder, it's not true, and that can make you feel defeated before you even start. J.

With my boy, I had to wait until he was ready. Meaning I had to wait until he said, "I want to go potty on the toilet." It was so hard to wait, but everything else I tried seemed to push him away from the idea. He fought me tooth and nail so I finally just waited until he was ready. Which was 3 years and a couple of months of age. My daughter on the other hand was 2 1/2 yo when she wanted to use the toilet-and she's been potty-trained ever since-with absolutely no effort on my part. She doesn't even need pull-ups at night. What a blessing!!! :-)