lEating Dinner and After Dinner Snacks

My son pretty much always has a snack right before bed, but lately he doesn't always want to eat his dinner. I tell him he can't have anything else that evening until he eats everything. If he doesn't finish dinner, and then asks for something later, I direct him back to his dinner. He has gone to bed a few times without eating more (he knows I mean it and doesn't fight it), but usually he eats dinner, and then wants a snack as well, which he gets. If she really is hungry, she will eat what you gave her.

She's not hungry at 6:00 but having a little something is getting her tummy primed to eat. When my kids were small and couldn't reach into the cabinets themselves I woul slice up some red peppers, zucchini, celery and put a little salad dressing in the middle of a bowl with the veggies. They'd snack on that between 4:30 - 6:00 while they would normally be cranky. by the time we sat down to dinner they had their vegetables, they were still hungry and they're have their protein and carbs. It worked out and there was very little after dinner desire. But some healthy desert like yogurt or a smoothie isn't a bad thing at 7:00 or so anyway....

I have heard of parents saving the dinner plate and re-introducing it to the child who doesn't eat and is hungry shortly after, but I have never been able to do it. I have picky eaters and I sometimes don't feel like eating what I, myself, made, so I allow grapes, yogurt, cucumber, etc. I figure that if it's healthy, what's the big deal.
I'm sure someone will disagree.

You have to be consistant - either she eats her meal and goes to bed hungry a few times or you change things up. It seems to be an age thing where they rather graze than eat a big meal or two. My son, 5 likes to have a small breakfast right when he wakes, Yogurt then a larger breakfast a few hours later like a bowl of cereal. For lunch he will eat a sandwich and fruit cup but then want a snack a few hours later - smoothie or popcorn and fruit then dinner, small portion and and half a slim fast (he likes doc says okay) a few hrs later. He is happy, I am happy and no empty threats are being made. I think you might want to re think the rule for an older age.

My son went through this phase. We simply wrapped up his plate and when he said he wanted a snack, we'd let him finish dinner. We don't have a "clean your plate" rule. But this way we knew he was really hungry and not just hoping to get some great snack. He was like this for a few months. Now our 3 1/2 year old is like this, only at breakfast time. I save her breakfast and when she starts telling me she's hungry, she can finish her breakfast.

My younger daughter is like that. She doesn't focus on eating during dinner, says she is full, and then later says she's hungry. I just save her dinner plate. If she says she's hungry later, out comes her dinner plate, which she is welcome to eat if she likes. I do not allow other snacking afterward, because I believe wasting a whole plate of food from dinner is just wrong (and also gives her the impression that I am some kind of short-order cook, which I am not)!

My five-year-old has always been a snacker. I don't think I've ever seen that girl eat a full meal. She eats small snacks all day long, that's just the way she prefers it. So, I, like you, have fought the dinner battle many times & lost because it's just hard. Only lately have I realized that it's a losing battle that I'm not really willing to fight anyway. I'm sure my energy can be better spent elsewhere. So, I let them snack. If they don't want what I'm cooking, oh well, I don't like everything either. Is it really that big of a deal? Especially if their snacks are healthy? I don't think so. :)

A lot of moms make mealtime and eating all about rules and discipline but I just don't look at food that way, in our home cooking and eating is something we take pleasure in, it's not another chore or job we have to get through.

A lot of us don't feel like eating at exactly the same time every day. If she doesn't feel like eating at dinner but is hungry later, what's the problem? As long as she's eating something that's healthy, and as long as she is not expecting you to make her a special, separate meal, then I don't see why it's such a big deal. At four she's also old enough to clean up after herself so it's not like she's making more work for you, right?

Just my two cents :)

I always offer a bedtime snack. I think it is sad of kids don't have that option. In childcare kids must be offered a meal of snack every 3-4 hours if they are awake.

I don't battle over food. She may have swallowed some air as she was chewing and her tummy was full. She burped and now she's not full.

If she is truly hungry, she will eat at dinnertime. Sticking to your guns will help her realize she needs to eat at dinner. My daughter used to do that, she used to get a "stomachache" so she wouldn't have to finish dinner and yes, she would ask for dessert later. I told her sorry, you didn't finish dinner. She will not wither away for missing dinner or a few snacks. She will eventually learn but you have to stick to your guns or she's got you. Good Luck!

Maybe she fills up faster than you think and is hungry.

I never made a rule of eating everything on your plate and no snacks at my house. I don't get why some parents make dinner time a time to enforce discipline or show of power over children.

Why? because I am a grazer and my daughter is just like me. I cannot eat a full plate of food at any sitting. I recall being punished because I couldn't clean my plate. I still harbor tons of resentment toward my parents as well.

We probably have 4-6 very small meals a day which include something like... 1/2 sandwich, fruit, veggie, salad, etc. We snack on fruit, yogurt, nuts and healthy choices.

Example... today, I had a banana and water when I got up, It is 11:15 and I've had 1/2 turkey sandwich and water. This afternoon will be cheese, fruit, etc and dinner is fish. We are not a dessert family at all (just not into sweets) so that is not in the picture at our house.

Moderation is key when you are eating and if you have any junk snack. Sure we have a junk snack every now and then.... we just have that in moderation.

I woudn't let it become a habit. But you have to remember, her growing body will cause her cravings to come at different times and those cravings will be different each time. A well balanced meal will always help her to adjust to all the changes.

I'm mean. I've always told our son if he doesn't eat all his dinner he will go to bed hungry. He usually eats all his dinner and if he doesn't, no snack. He'll live. Now, if he eats all his dinner and I can tell he's still starving around bedtime, then he can have whatever sugarless low carb snack he wants.

when she is hungry 20 mins later give her the dinner she did not eat.

I think as long as it is a healthy snack, it's no big deal. All these issues are temporary, the kids are constantly changing. Go with the flow, and pick your battles, it makes life a little easier. It's always a good idea to let them know that if they do this, that will happen. Such as, " if you don't eat all your food, the only thing you are able to eat later will be carrot sticks or a yogurt." or whatever you normally feed her. But, you have to stick to what you say.
Good luck!

My youngest is like that. He eats little bits at a time. Like will eat one taco and then be done and 30 mins to an hour later is hungry again. Kids have small stomics and if they are active like mine wear it off quickly. If he had his way he would have food avalible 24/7 to where he could just eat when he wants to. I try not to be too hard on him and not give him anything after dinner.