When my daughter was a year old, we placed a potty chair in the bathroom and used the open door rule. She's been very interested in it and always liked to sit down and "go potty" while I was in there. She is now 22 months and this past weekend, while my husband was in the bathroom she said she needed to go potty. So we took her diaper off and she peed in the potty! We made a big deal out of it and let her put on her big girl panties. She was really excited. We only had 3 accidents the whole day and she went on the potty lots! The next day, we had LOTS of accidents (around 8) and only a couple of successes, though she did poop on the potty once. The third day we had about 8 accidents again and only 2 or 3 successes. She's not really telling us when she needs to go and when we ask her she says no, but then a couple minutes later she'll have an accident. When she shows signs like holding herself or doing the potty dance I'll ask her if she wants to go to the potty and sometimes she'll go, sometimes she'll say no and a couple of times she's cried. I don't want to force her, but on all accounts she is showing readiness signs. How long do I let this go before I decide that it's just not her time??
Lret me clarify that she is showing more than one sign: she doesn't want to be in wet pants, she asks to go to the potty (even when she doesn't need to go), she hold herself when she has the need, she tells us, etc. She is NOT wearing diapers, I have her in panties all day. My only real question is how long do I wait with all of these accidents in the panties before I decide that she's not really ready?
So I decided to stick with it. She loves her panties and she wants to go, so I don't mind doing the extra laundry. I put old towels down on the furniture just in case. She did great last night and this morning woke up and peed when I told her to go as soon as she got up. We've had the poop success again this morning. Great so far, no accidents. I just don't see a point in going backward since we're both maintaining out sanity and doing well. Each day there will be accidents, but she's getting the mechanics and doing well. Thanks for the help!
Hi S.,
She sounds ready to me. I would suggest Mom get real consistent and take her about every 20-30 minutes even if she doesn't show "signs". Stop waiting for her, she's only 22 months so you make the decision that she will try. Be very consistent and she'll be trained in no time at all. Blessings, L.
It can take a long time. A lot of kids go through phases where they're into it, then they aren't and go back and forth. I would say just be consistent in what you do and don't PUSH it, which will backfire!
Just keep the potty available to her and suggest that she use it. Have her try on a regular basis through out the day, reward her if she does something and try not to stress out about it.
Even after they are officially 'trained' and can go for the day without accidents MOST days, a lot of kids will still have accidents here and there. Potty training is just an ongoing messy process, lol, so keep it light and calm and fun for your daughter and she'll go to it on her own soon enough
I'm working on PT with my son so I'm certainly no expert, but one HUGE bit of advice for me was not to say "Do you want to go on the potty."
Of course he's going to say no. Isn't the answer to just about every question these days "No." I swear it comes out of my son's mouth before he thinks, lol.
Try saying..."it's time to sit on the potty."
Also, have some fun things that live in the bathroom temporarily so that by going to the bathroom, she may be leaving something fun, but there's fun things in the bathroom, too.
Good luck!
Let her go when she wants and encourage her to do so. or even give her a prize when shes done and she will expect it next time
It sounds to me like she's doing awesome!
For what it's worth, I never asked my kids if they had to go. I took them everytime I went potty or everytime we passed the bathroom. I put them on the potty about every half hour or so and yes, I spent lots of time in the bathroom "taking turns" going potty, even if neither of us actually went.
My kids never did use their little potty chairs. They dragged them around the house and hid toys in them. They preferred the big potty, but it sounds like your little one has really taken to hers.
I would continue with what you're doing, except for the asking her or waiting for her to tell you part.
Accidents are just part of it until they get things figured out. It doesn't mean she's not ready. And she doesn't like being wet so that's really good too.
Everyone says boys are harder than girls, but my son was so easy it was amazing. He couldn't STAND being wet, not for one single second and the only way to avoid that was not to pee in his pants anymore. He was all for that!
I think she's going great! I wouldn't turn back now!
Best wishes!
I'm going to share this again, It's up to the parents, not the child to show being intetested. by 22 months my kids were already trained, we didn'y leave it up to them. What were the consquences for your daughter pooping and peeing on herself, if there were none theres your answer. Its very difficult to train a child if your still putting diapers on them.J.
There are two things I would try because she really does sound ready. First, get the book called Potty Training in a Day. It is very helpful, I used it with my son and in a 1/2 day he was potty trained and NO accidents - EVER. It was amazing. With my second son, he did not seem like the personality type to follow the book like my first one so I used some of the same techniques but added what I called a reward bowl. I went to the dollar store and filled it with everything he totally loves, let him dig through the bowl so he could see what was in there, then told him that he could pick one item from the bowl every time he went in the toilet. It worked like a charm - 1 day he was trained - NO accidents!
See if one of these helps. I know each kid is different so just figure out what works for your child. I have never had to ask my boys if they have to go and sometimes wonder if that makes them more frustrated when we constantly hound them about it. Now for the record, my daughter is 24 months and showing signs that she is ready. I have not done a thing because I am not sure what her style is yet. I am sure it will come to me. = )
Good luck!
Let her continue. She is showing the signs. Encourage her. My first 3 were very much like this. After a while, one day one of my girls decided it was time. 2 weeks later, she was done. She then trained my son.
My 2 yr old now thinks that you sit on the potty for a minute or 2, wipe yourself and then flush. I am sure she will get it eventually. Hopefully sooner than later since she does not like any wetness on the diaper and we are going through them very quickly now. :)
She is showing O. sign of readiness. Rushing her will prolong potty training and make it more difficult. Let her go at her own pace. Keep encouraging her to use the potty. To me, it sounds like you had some success due to coincidence. Good luck!
I haven't read the rest of the posts, so sorry if I am being repetitive. I would say that it depends on what you mean by ready. If you are going to continue as you have been, and expect her to just do better, I don't think she is there yet. If you are going to start taking her every 20 minutes, and plan on really making a go with it, only you know your child.
My son started as your daughter has, although he wasn't ready that first time. We are letting him lead us and tell us when he needs to go, and when he is ready for the underwear stage. He took the next step at 24 months and has been telling us more consistently, although he still isn't ready for the underwear stage. We are just taking him more often and he has been waking up from nap and bed dry. Daycare has been a big help, and I know that he will tell me when he is ready for the underwear phase. That being said, I am more of the gradual, let him lead me type of person, rather than the potty train in one day person.
Hi! Be cautious to let others define the "right time" for your daughter. I learned from experience that little ones can be trained if they're showing signs of ready. My second little guy trained just before he was 2 and so many said that boys always train late. Not in this case! Read the signs from your little girl and if she's willing and showing signs why not go for it?
She's definitely ready, and the earlier you do this, the less resistance she'll give you. Whether or not she says she has to go, take her to the potty every 20-30 minutes alllllll day long. The other thing I'd do is have her go around (while you're at home) without panties on. Somehow having panties on is a little like having diapers on, and her habit of nearly 2 years is just to pee whenever and wherever. Without panties on, it will be a constant reminder to her that she's not wearing a diaper. With both of my daughters, they peed on their feet a few times and quickly realized they didn't like that feeling!
The thing about potty training is, people nowadays think that it has to be child-led. But that's silly, children have never used the potty before, so how on earth are they supposed to lead the process? It's our job as parents to teach them what to do, and help them and coach them and believe in them until they can do it! Keep on doing what you've been doing, and she will get it!
S.,
I haven't read the other responses, so bear with me if I'm repeating someone else's advice.
I believe you'll confuse your child if you go backward at this point. Keep moving forward. Don't wait for her to answer 'yes'. Take her to the potty BEFORE she is doing the potty dance. (I do the potty dance, wish I'd have learned to go before I have to!!;) ) She has shown great signs that she is ready by going and you've hung in there a LONG time with that potty chair being around for over a year. You two can do this. Just keep at it!! It doesn't sound to me like she needs rewarded for going, she likes to use her potty and hates being wet. :) You're already doing an awesome job!!
Go Mom!!
V.
For how young she is , it sounds as though she is doing great , I would stick at it but instead of asking if she needs to go , just sit her on every hour or maybe every 45 mins and see if she goes. She is still quite young to recognise the signs of needing to go. If she starts to resist sitting on the potty and acts like she is scared , then that would be a sign to hold for a month or so and then try again.
Let me start by saying I'm no expert in potty training by any means...in fact I am currently potty training my 25 month old (and the only child I've ever potty trained).
I tried potty training her around 22 months. (Same as you...no diapers, no pullups, panties only) We had a couple of successes with going in the potty, but more accidents than success. So after 3 days of that, for my sanity I put her back in diapers and decided to try again in a couple of months. I started about a week ago again, and since I started she's only had about an accident a day (and yesterday no accidents at all!!) In my opinion, if your sanity is gone, put her back in the diapers and try again in a month or two when she's a little more ready. It worked for me. Good luck!!
My daughter was almost completely done (including night training) at 22 months. Yes, she is ready. Now, you need to come up with a plan to assist her in accomplishing this goal.
She needs to learn control and timing. These take time, and she will require you to help her learn this stuff. Get her on a schedule, and never ask her if she needs to go. Make it questions like "do you want to go potty before snack or after? do you want to use mommy's toilet or your toilet?"
Great job in keeping her in panties. Now, you just need to help her be successful. After a while, she will be able to take full responsibility for taking herself to the potty. They say that most kids still need help till 3. My daughter is very good about taking herself off to the potty, but they are just so easily distracted, accidents will happen. In fact, I read that you should expect accidents for up to 8 months.
To answer your end question: do not turn back and put her back in diapers. That will just confuse her. Hang in there, clean up the messes, and she will be trained much sooner than if you turn back. Tell her she is too big for diapers, and believe her capable of mastering this very difficult developmental milestone. Be patient, never show negative emotion, and when she has accidents, just say "pee/poop go in the potty."
She is very much ready! She is going on the potty! Just give her the time and space to learn the timing and control. It could take a few months or a few weeks.
Oh yes, and expect regressions, lots of them. For every step forward, you will go back, and then, one day you will wake up and not recall when the last accident was. But accidents aren't signs that they aren't ready, it's signs that they are LEARNING.
I used to sit all of my kids on the potty every hour. This way they can start understanding what it feels like when they need to go. I know pull-ups are expensive but maybe you can use them for about a week or two until she learns a sign to tell you that she needs to go. My daughter used to grab her crotch and squeeze her legs together. "Let's go sit on the potty because you are such a big girl!" Were the words that always worked best for me. My boys just decided they would go and they trained me. Unless she is showing a lot of resistance to the whole process I would not give up. Mistakes are part of learning too.
Whether she trains at 22mos or 4yrs, there will be accidents. Keep at it, and remind her to go. Set a timer if you have to. Don't ask, just say 'potty time!' and go with her. She won't tell you for a while yet, so make it your responsibility.
i think it depends on how much laundry you want to do. if you are fine with all the things that need washing when she has accidents, keep going with it. if it's starting to stress you out, tell her she needs to wear pullups until she's able to have no more accidents. she can even wear underwear over the pullups.. but still encourage her to use the potty. keep in mind that when she's 3 she may change her mind about potty training. you can reduce the accidents by just taking her to the toilet when you think it's time rather than letting her make all the decisions about it. there was a time when we were watching the clock with our second child to take him to the bathroom every hour. he got tired of it, but that's what it took to keep him dry.
We went through this until WE decided when our daughter went on the potty (in addition to when she asked). We would ask after a certain amount of time, she would often say that she didn't need o go, and then have an accident. What I started to say was, "lets just go try, mommy needs to go and I need your help" and then she would take a turn. Also, she often had accidents when she was having too much fun or was too busy to even notice. Good luck. It sounds to me that she is ready.
I am a firm beleiver in several of the portion of the "3 day potty training method"....and its usually more than 3 days but it is a great base. It shows incredible commitment and does work.
I never force a child (I do childcare) to sit on the potty at timed intervals..that is training the adults. I also never ask "do you need to go potty?"..of course they will say no..kids at this age say no to everything, right? I remind..."tell me when you need to go potty...make sure you let me know when you need to go pee..or poopy"..things like that. I put the power on them to listen to their body. My job is to watch every teeny tiny little thing they do..at least for those first few days...every little "off" twitch, unusual whine, etc that tells me something is up, so I can help them understand to read their body.
At home (or my childcare home) just wearing a tshirt and undies helps too...if they do pee I can see it faster. We do NOT have potty seats anywhere but the bathroom (altho my preference is using the regular toilet)..they need to learn that we go potty in the bathroom...not in the livingroom (on a potty chair), or anywhere else in the house, etc.
I also offer one M & M for a successful potty episode..meaning they produce something..not just a sitting down and trying (or we would be trying all day long and never get out of there!) I put them in a tiny take and toss container. By the time its empty, they have this figured out and I just "run out".......no more candies....
In the last year I have succesfully used this method on 4 kids...3 boys ages 28-30 mos all done in 2 weeks time and a 22 mos old girl...she was the easiest... (altho the night thing is up to parents...I do no diapers and think pull ups are evil and will not use them at my house :-)
Keep her in her panties and keep on, keeping on!
