My son is 13 1/2 months old, and for quite awhile now he's been interested in his ears. I was worried that he had an ear infection, but he's been playing with them (rolling them, pulling them, etc.) for months and his pediatrician says they look fine. I've noticed that he does this especially when he's tired, and even when he wakes during the night or naps. Sometimes he even hangs on to them in his sleep! I am thinking that this could be how he comforts himself (he also uses a pacifier while sleeping). Has anyone else seen this? Should I introduce a stuffed animal or something for comfort instead? I was terrified of SIDS and still haven't put anything in his crib for that reason, and he is a very active sleeper so I've still been hesitant even though he's probably past that stage now. If I do introduce something like this, how do I do it?
I had a particular blanket that I wanted my youngest to have as his "blankie". I just started putting it in the crib with him at every nap and bedtime and he did the rest.
Hi J. - I totally understand the SIDS fears but at 13 months, he is well past the danger zone. The highest danger passed at around 4-5 months. I'm glad your doc says that his ears are healthy - that is a comfort to you I'm sure.
Just remember that your son is at the age where habits are built that he will carry on into his 2s and beyond. If he pulls his ears now to the extent to are saying, then he will continue to do it unless you provide a substitute to transfer the behavior onto - and quick!!! He's found a perfectly natural prop in the absence of anything else to play with or comfort him. He's getting old enough to want to start making some of his own choices. If you wait too long, he may choose to keep pulling on his ears long after you think it is acceptable. Same goes for the pacifier. It all depends on your comfort level with his behavior and any anxiety that his ear pulling might cause you. Babies and toddlers all need a way to comfort themselves, alleviate anxiety, relieve teething pressure etc. If it's not his ears, then you'll need to give him a substitute.
I think "loveys" are a really great thing for kids. It gives them something of their own to love and nurture and depend on. At +1, introducing one is easy - try a few and over time, he will gravitate and start asking for the one that he likes best. A good place to start might be a beany baby or another small stuffed animal that he likes to play with during the day. (Maybe something that has big soft ears? ha!) Just let him take it to bed with him and tuck them both in for nap. Talk to him and tell him that "little bear" or "doggie" gets to go to naptime too - and take both your son and his little lovey through the bedtime ritual together.
He might even start asking for 2 or 3 or 4 to be in bed with him - don't sweat it. You can always "tidy up" his crib after he goes to sleep, transfering his stuffed animals to stand watch in the corners of crib.
My son who is also a very active sleeper, has 2 little dogs and a bear that he likes to sleep with. He adores the little doggies. He has a little floppy dog about 12 inches long that he has had in bed with him since about 7 months old and another one smaller one. He actually picked out the littler dog at a gift shop when he was 15months old - it was love at first site and I felt impulsive buying it because it was a little expensive but it was soft and cuddly and really very cute. (I know, I'm still justifying it!) Those 2 dogs are his crib companions. He used to take the bigger dog with him everywhere, but now that he is over 2, they mostly stay in his room.
Just one last thing, mom to mom, about fear. I was afraid of SIDS too and I would wake up and have to go into their rooms just to make sure they were still okay. I still go into my boys rooms when they are sleeping just to check on them, cover them up or give them a kiss or a touch on the cheek. I support you that it's okay to let that fear of SIDS go and trust that he will be okay in bed with a lovey or a blanket.
best of all things to you and your family,
C.
You can definitely try the 'lovey' of your choice by offering it regularly, putting it in the crib, etc. But there is a chance that he may not attach to it. My son never would in spite of my trying, although both of my girls got seriously attached to blankets. Even if he doesn't, he'll be fine. I'm sure the ear thing is for comfort and won't hurt anything either way. Good luck!
My teenage nephew has a thing with his ears, too. I think most kids outgrow those attachments, but it's really not a big deal that he hasn't. He just plays with them when he's really tired. My son (almost 4) likes to play with his nipple. I've heard that it's not at all uncommon for children to attach to some part of their own body for self-soothing.
You could try to introduce a lovey, but be aware that it might not work. I tried when my son was small 'cause he was a terrible napper & I hoped it would help. He never did attach to one.
I did make a small fleece blanket with some trims of different textures sewn on it. But if he doesn't ever attach to that, at least he's got that nipple. ;)
I would introduce one. It is so comforting to them. The only suggestion that I have is to buy multiples of whatever he attaches to. My daughter is 3 and sleeps with her "dolly" but Babies R Us stopped carrying it, so this is the only one she has and if it is lost we are all in for a world of hurt!
o.k. this will sound kind of weird, but how about using a cloth diaper? they are soft, cotton & breathable... and not so large that he could smother or get it wrapped around his neck (though at 13 mos, it is probably not so much of a worry).
it sounds kind of impersonal, but we did this with my daughter (from say 7-14 mos)... she still likes them, but doesn't always want one to sleep with.
the beauty part about the cloth diaper is that you can easily substitute a clean one for the drooled on one at a moment's notice. my daughter used to kind of cling to hers... i think it also helped that I used one while nursing to catch drips, spit-up, etc. so they probably carried that scent.
good luck!
Our son adopted a blanket at 6 months as his. We just let him have it. It was hard for me to get over the SIDS thing, too. You can just let him try out a few things and see what he likes. Our daughter has a little soft blanky that she likes to finger, but we haven't let her have it in bed yet since she's only 4 months. Both of theirs have been kind of furry type soft and fuzzy. GL! (There is a part of me that says if he's doing fine, don't start it. Once it's started it can be a hassle, but maybe he shouldn't be rubbing his ears so much, either.)
I echo the advice of a cloth diaper. Both my children got attached to them. I bought the ones at Walmart that come 12 to a pack. They were the flat-fold ones without any center panel. After a couple washings they are very soft and we always have at least 20 around the house - a bunch at the babysitters and a few in the diaper bag! It is awesome not to have search the house for just one "lovie".
