Ideas to Get My Kids to Eat.

I have a SERIOUS lollygagger at my house - he is the youngest of 6. It drives me crazy because I cannot finish up the meal/dishes with him still at the table and, if I let him, he would sit until the next meal! In order to keep my sanity (and stop yelling about it), I ended up doing the following:

I set the timer for each meal - if there are other kids at the table, he gets 5 more minutes after the last kid is done. If he is eating alone (it happens occasionally), he gets 15 min for breakfast, 20 for lunch and 30 for dinner. When the timer goes off, I calmly pick up his plate, dump the food (he can finish his drink), and send him on his way. I used to do the timer on the table, but that seemed to stress him out, so I just set the microwave timer, which he cannot see from his seat.

A 4 and 6 yr old will not starve themselves :) Set some limits at the table and you will be a happier mom and they will learn that there are limits as well. I would also consider eliminating in-between snacks or at least cutting back.

Good luck!

drop it, if they eat they eat if not , o well. They aren't going to starve.
eating and potty training are the two areas where kids can control their lives and they will.
If they haven't eaten by the time dinner is over remove their plates from the table and that's it. No prodding no threatening , etc. If they finish dinner they can have dessert.

So they like the food that you are making but are just not eating it? Is it a case where they are eating a little bit of it but not as much as you would like? 2, 4 and 6-year olds have little stomachs so, if they are nibbling at some of the food but not all, maybe you are serving them too big of portions. It could be a case where they are eating just enough to satisfy their appetite.

How's the between meal snacking situation? If you are feeding them a lot of dense packaged foods as snacks, that might be effecting the appetite come dinner time. Maybe stick with fresh fruits and veggies as snacks, served at a specific time so that they are not grazing too close to dinner time, and save the heavier foods for actual sit down dinners.

Overall, hows their health and their weight? If they seems to have lots of energy, not getting sick all the time and are in a normal weight range for their age, and seem to like the food that you are serving but just not into eating a lot of it, I really wouldn't worry about this issue right now. When they are big strapping teenagers and are eating you out of house and home, you'll look back at this period of time and just chuckle.

Hope this helps.

2 hours at the table?? You're already losing this battle. You can't force them to eat without creating problems. Just stop. They won't starve. Offer them nutritious meals and snacks, give them 15-20 minutes at the table, and drop it. Mealtime should be social time for the family, something to look forward to.You'll be less stressed, and they'll eat better. Kids learn very young that this is something they can win, and it becomes a power struggle instead of a meal. Remember, in any power struggle, it's vital that you win, and you can't here. There are too many things that are more important in their lives for you to be able to control, so let this go.

I didn't read the previous answers so forgive me if this is a repeat. So you've tried everything... have you tried "nothing?" My five year old is a non eater as well, so we place his dinner in front of him each evening as we sit down as a family to eat and I announce "this is what I made, you may eat it or not, you may like it or not, but this is dinner." A few times he has chosen not to eat, at bedtime when he announces that he's hungry I say kindly, "I'm sorry, dinner was earlier, remember you chose not to eat? You can have a big breakfast tomorrow." yes, he cries, yes it breaks my heart, BUT he has chosen to eat dinner from then on (this took a few tries for him to figure out that I was serious and for me to be convinced that he wouldn't starve to death over night! haha). now he eats dinner, all or only a few bites, depending on what he chooses to eat, KNOWING that this is the last meal of the day, no arguments. When he does eat all his dinner we sometimes have a late evening snack on the porch like apples, cheese, yogurt. But this is brought up AFTER dinner, not used as a ploy to get him to eat before dinner! let it go and give them the power, that's what they want! They are old enough to choose to be hungry or full :)

There is a site called weelicious, that i use all the time. It has great kid friendly recipes. It makes food fun and nutritious, but isn't complicated to prepare. Also, if you are on facebook, you can find Weelicious on there, and she has great pictures of her kid's lunches. I emulate the way she does her kid's lunches for my son, who also wouldn't eat. Good luck!

www.weelicious.com

http://www.facebook.com/weelicious

My favorite saying--three things you can not make a child do (sigh), eat, sleep, or pee and poop, on command.

I had a non eater who was always at the the top of his class in height. He is now 6'2" and his wife has made him eat vegetables.

His sister ate everything I put in front of her and was always thin and average in height. She wore it of in activities. I never saw a more normally active child. She is now 5.7, a vegetarian, rock climbs, class 5 kayaker, skies in winter. and mountain bikes in summer. Thin and beautiful in her mother's eyes.

My philosphy was formed at my mother's table when she always had to take a bite of every thing. Yuck!

My mother's philosopy was formed at my grandmother's tabled where they worried that she was too thin and made sure that she ate every thing.

Let them go hungry...child will not starve. No snacks in between meals. No special order meals. If they don't like it they can sit til every one is done and then be excused.

my friend makes everything as a kabob, so if your meal is chicken, peas, & apples, just put it all together on one stick for each kid

The more attention you give it, the more attention they'll want for it. Just offer them a balanced meal and give them 45 minutes (or less) to eat it. When the timer goes off, then there's nothing more available until 2 hours later (or whatever time seems reasonable to you). If they don't eat dinner, they can eat it as a snack before bed or wait until morning to eat. You could make it more fun than punitive by treating your kitchen like a diner. Post the hours, make menus (not short order cook menus, but descriptions of what's available), set the table with cheesy plastic flowers, etc.

Our doctor said that you can't make a child eat that they will eat when they are hungry. My kids eat at every meal and then in between as well. My nephew will go days without eating and even store food in his cheek like a chipmonk. My sister has offered him everything in order for him to eat on a regular basis. She was told that as long as he is happy and healthy he will eat when he wants too! Things have gone much better at their house and at our weekly family functions after she quit forcing him to eat.

Oh...feeding my kids has caused a lot of stress in my household...I have 6 year old twins and a 3 year old. I now make a meal and that is what we are having. We give them about 30-45 minutes to eat max and then the meal is done and if it is dinner time, they know that is it until breakfast....no snacks after dinner. Sometimes they eat a lot and sometimes they just pick. We encourage, but don't force them to eat. It becomes too much of a battle. They are in charge of their own bodies. Two hours is way too much time. I really don't worry too much about it. I supply the food, it is up to them to eat. I try to always have at least 1 thing I know they like and will eat. As others have said, they will eat when they are hungry. Some days my kids eat nothing, some days they eat everything. I've come to accept this and it is a process...a slow process...but I am finding my kids are eating more and more open to trying new foods.

Offer breakfast, lunch and dinner, no snacks unless they finish their meals. Don't make a battle out of it, they won't starve. Serve their meals and after what you deem to be an appropriate amount of time has passed, mealtime is over and nothing to eat until the next meal...if they are hungry, they will eat, if not they won't.

Sorry I can't give you advice, because my 2 kids, 7 and 5, are just like that. Every dinner is a battle. I just don't understand why they don't feel hungry? What worries me most is they are small and skinny compared with other kids of their age. Every evening when our neighborhood kids are playing outside, they are still eating their dinner. I know they want so badly to go outside, too, but they aren't allowed unless they finish their meal. Sometimes I give in by allowing them to go if they finish half. But I'm just worried how they grow if they eat so little? Am I too obsessed? I need help too!

I was discussing this problem with my son's teacher (my son is 5 ) and she told me that she creates a eating game to get her kids to eat their food. She will reward the winner with some type of special reward (the winner is the one who finishes his or her food first) also, she told me about a game where you must eat the number of spoonfuls of food for your age. The four year old will at least have to eat 4 spoonfuls and the six year old will have to eat six spoonfuls-this could help on those days when they refuse to eat anything. I have tried this and it worked.

Just stop trying to make them eat. I know it is much harder on you but I have never heard of a child who is offered food to starve to death. Put dinner out, so you have so long to eat (you don't have to time it if you don't want to) and be done with it. If they excuse themselves from the table and return later saying they are hungry then just put their plate of dinner (the original meal) right back down in front of them. When you offer treats or other bribes you are going down a path ypu don't want to go. They will soon expect something in return for something. Good luck with it all, just remember this is not abnormal behavior, almost all children go through this phase.

M.

A suggestion that might work is planning some type of fun activity after dinner. Maybe a special movie lets say. If dinner is finished in a amount of time you feel is appropiate let them no they can watch their favorite movie. Or maybe go to the library and get a DVD of a book they like. If they finish the meal in the time frame you want they get to watch it. If they don't do it no video or whatever you choose. I would also suggest leaving the area where after you finish your meal and check on them occasionally if they choose to take forever to finish their meals. I had a little boy I watched that could take forever to eat his lunch all the other kids would finish he would still be at the table. I would give him 45 minutes to finish and if he wasn't I told him lunch time was over we needed to take naps now. He still took along time but he started to finish in the time frame I gave him. It took a few days of being very consistent. When he saw the other kids get to go play for awhile before naps and didn't enjoying being at the table by himself . He made the choice to eat faster still the slowest but everyone didn't have to wait for him. good luck.

If they choose not to eat just let them know that they will not get any dessert and or snacks later. When later comes and they will inevitably ask, stand firm (as hard as it will be). Very shortly they will realize they need to eat dinner. The other thing is, you can make a game of whoever finishes first gets to pick the dinner the next night. My kids are the same age as yours and we've had a lot of breakfast the last few nights or quesadillas by their choosing :)

i think that many people have the same concern that you have - and I also think that sometimes we (at least I know I do) expect our kids to eat more than they need to eat...Sometimes my son (4) will only eat one big meal every other day - although I always offer him the same amount of food...unfortunately, we have wasted a lot, which I don't like. As long as they are not asking for snacks all day long, they may just not need more fuel! When my son asks for snacks between meals, which is rare, I basically only give him what I would give as part of a meal (a fruit, vegetable or cheese). If he is hungry AND he did eat a good meal prior to being hungry, then I let him pick a more snacky food.

Meals are such a hassle. My daughter is the same way, although not as extreme. Breakfast and lunch, I kind of let her pick(I give her two options), and we have 2 small snacks a day(she picks out of two options), but at dinner, she gets what I make. If she eats, great, if not, then after 30 mins, I clear the table and we are done. I don't allow her anything else and remind her she chose not to eat. Yep, we get the big crocodile tears and I am starving, but that is that. I don't give in unless she is sick and that is a whole different story.
Do your kids snack during non meal times? That could be part of the culprit too. I know if my daughter has had too much to snack on, she rarely eats. You could try to limit the snack to a certain time and a small amount.
I think the biggest part is being consistent about what you decide too. So, come up with a plan and stick with it for 2 to 3 weeks and see if there is improvement. Kids will not starve themselves....I bet you will see a difference in 3 to 5 days.

My three year old isn't always in the mood to eat, and I work more or less full-time from home, so I don't have time to be a "coaxing waitress" (as I've told my husband). So that I'm not kept from the other myriad things I need to do, I have simplified. Here are some tips:

Make food that will more or less "keep" for a few (3) hours on the counter. Hard-boiled or scrambled eggs, cheese, veggie strips, cut-up fruit, crackers, simple sandwiches (nut butter and jelly), nuts, etc. No, they won't be as tasty as they might if the child had eaten them when they were first offered, but their palates aren't usually as easily offended as an adult's. And then, don't offer any substitutions for that meal.

Let them choose each choose one minor menu item each day, if it works for their age/level of maturity. Some kids will chose and then change their mind (mine doesn't get this sort of choices right now for that reason), so if that's the case, just skip this suggestion.

Offer a plate with at least two choices. Nothing backfires on us more than offering one choice, because we begin to second-guess ourselves if they are liking/off that food today, etc. Two or three choices on a plate is sufficient. (I've learned this one the hard way)

Let them help with cooking if they're interested. I didn't realize how helpful this would be, but my son's become more interested in trying new dishes and sampling the ingredients as we go along because he's working side-by-side with me. Kids can cut up some softer veggies and fruits with butter-knives, and love having their own cutting board/space. (I just reread your post and understand if this doesn't work for all meals--it's not always an inducement with mine either...perhaps have them make their own simple sandwiches?)

Put out the food and then, that's it. No offering any other alternatives. They will not starve themselves to death or die. They might be a bit cranky b/c they are hungry, and then you can redirect them back to the table. Leave the food at their place, too, unless you need the space and then just set it on the counter, explaining that you'll keep it for later.

By far and away, my two biggest tips for the families I've worked with: A. don't keep any food around the house that you don't want your kids to wheedle you for (if it's an adult treat, hide it well and eat it later when kids are in bed) and B. don't make an issue out of dessert. Many families I know do a 'backward dinner' where dessert is served as a small, 3 o'clock snack and then dinner later; the whole 'dragging our feet through a miserable dinner to get to dessert' usually lessens. My sis also has two 'dessert days' a week, where her boys can count on always having a dessert, regardless of meal consumption, etc. This has removed a large element of attempted negotiation on my nephews' part, as the conversation ends with "Today isn't a dessert day. We'll have dessert on Thursday."

Some kids need something else to do when they are eating. Offering some books/kid magazines to look at might help, or anything that you don't mind getting sticky fingers on. Busy wigglers might need to eat standing up at the table (mine can rarely sit down), but I would again leave it to them.

If you can, divorce yourself a bit from the emotional aspects of their eating. We feel like 'bad' parents when our kids don't eat, but they often are have phases where food just isn't important. Or they are so busy, they need quiet moments. If that's the case, see if they might like to have a story read to them. There are plenty of chapter books that are appropriate for 4&6s, and if you have a routine of reading 5 pages at lunch (not contingent on whether or not they are eating), this might change the setting just enough to get them settled into the meal. Or not. But if you aren't emotionally involved, it will put the onus back on them to settle this,because you aren't giving them anything to resist against. Thus, power struggle avoided. And then, get up from the table when you are done eating and move on with your day.

These suggestions won't work for every kid, but they've been lying around in the parenting toolbox, so I thought I'd share. Hope it goes well!

I always find that the threats or fighting cause each to dig their heels in and not make any progress(at least at our house). My favorite thing to do with my 5 year old is to suggest he can't finish his plate- or make them race. I know you don't want them scarfing it down- but it sure beats the alternative. We've also made comments about not wanting them to eat because the food helps him grow and we want him to stay little forever. The other thing we've done is "measured muscles" by feeling his flexed arm- if he hasn't ate much we always call him wimpy until he finishes his plate and then we'll say how big his muscles are. Good luck. It may be his personality, but I find his little buddies are suckers for this stuff as well.

Updated

I always find that the threats or fighting cause each to dig their heels in and not make any progress(at least at our house). My favorite thing to do with my 5 year old is to suggest he can't finish his plate- or make them race. I know you don't want them scarfing it down- but it sure beats the alternative. We've also made comments about not wanting them to eat because the food helps him grow and we want him to stay little forever. The other thing we've done is "measured muscles" by feeling his flexed arm- if he hasn't ate much we always call him wimpy until he finishes his plate and then we'll say how big his muscles are. Good luck. It may be his personality, but I find his little buddies are suckers for this stuff as well.

No more kids diet. Put them on organic vegetables, soy burgers, fruits, cereals, nutbutters and organic bread. Give them small portions for which there are seconds if they want.
When they haven't eaten in half an hour take the food away and say time's up.
Next meal serve nutritious organic food and if in half an hour they have not eaten meal is over.
They will begin eating in three days.
Also sit with them and eat the same food they eat. Do not make a big deal out of their manners and other things. If you have to make finger food until you see they are eating sufficiently and then switch to food that is eaten with spoons and forks.

Hi A., I read a book a few years ago entitled "How to Get Kids to Eat Great and Love it, the author is Dr. Christine Wood. You should be able to find it on amazon.com. My son is now 8 and he eats very well. I also learned how to pick my battles. As my grandma use to say, when they are hungry enough, they'll eat. You just can't guilt yourself or let them guilt you.
E.

Sometimes lack of desire to eat can be caused by vitamin/mineral deficiency.

Specifically any one of these : vit A, magnesium, iron, zinc, trace minerals.

Vit A: children need animal fats for vit A because they cannot make the conversion from beta carotene. Animal protien is required for a healthy appetite.

Magnesium is a very common deficiency, especially in those who supplement iron/zinc, or eat high carb/grain/sugar or milk. MG can be supplemented very safely in children as any excess leaves the body. Use Magnesium Malate or Magnesium citrate. (or kidcalm).

Iron- iron is interesting. It is one of things you can't have too much of and you can't have too little of. Both cause problems. Because Iron does not leave tissues easy, it can builup to a poisonous level in young kids quickly, and indeed 30% of child deaths are from iron overdose. For that reason, iron should never be supplemented without a blood test showing clear anemia. Most people should have no problem keeping iron as it builds up. Anyone who does has other health issues (internal or external bleeding, dysregulation of iron uptake, Bacterial overgrowth , etc)...that need to be dealt with.

I haven't studied that much about zinc. but again, like iron, it IS a metal. so it shouldnt be taken in if the body has good amounts already. Children with white marks on thier nails need zinc. (get it in fulvics, below)

Trace minerals: An excellent way to get trace minerals is through FULVIC ACID. you can find this online or in the health food store. Excellent for children and adults to take.

The other thing that can reduce appetite is a high milk diet,(high milk diets also create magnesium deficiences) or drinking milk and any beverages between meals or even with meals that are non- water. Make all drinks water only. At all times.
Packaged snacks like granola bars, cracker stix, and all the rest of those, create severe mineral imbalances and toxicity (they cotain murcury from the corn syrups and processed grain) that lead to poor appetitie issues and should not even be in the house.

ps. magnesium can help with innatention, lack of desire, apathy, etc,as well...

Good luck,

Gail

I think you should at a doctor or say here comes the train or say its candy eat it stuff like that

They will eat when they get hungry. My kid still does it at 8 years.