Don't buy tickets anywhere if your husband may go out of town. Too much of a commitment for something you all may not go to.
Go bowling! There's nothing like smelly shoes and throwing large and heavy balls in quasi-darkness after a few drinks of the adult nature, that brings a family together and makes memories.
A gun range would make for an unforgettable birthday, though you won't be able to take the kids. It was all very, very safe and very stress releasing. We went to an indoor range where alot of cops went for practice. We took a short psych eval, signed tons of waivers and got to pick our own gun (I have small hands so they gave me a .9ml but I switched to a .22cal). After a short lesson on gun range etiquette and firing lessons with a trained instructor we got to fire away. Believe me, your husband will not soon forget target practice with his family as well as the hideous orange ear protectors they make you wear, on his birthday.
I went to a cheap and tacky food party once. I brought a plate of Oreo's topped with canned whipped cream swirls and everyone LOVED them. Took home an empty plate! A similar salty snack could be ritz crackers topped with canned spray cheese. Yum!
You can also just throw a costume party at home and have everyone either dress up from the 70's or 80's or worse, as a character on the Disney channel, even the adults. Good luck and hopeyou have fun whatever you do!