So...I have dealt with no having anyone understand that I was burnt out, taken for granted, and just plain needed a break. I, like yourself, was a sahm; taking care of absolutely everything and going to school full time. And my husband also didn't grasp what possible reason I would have to be tired, cranky, burnt out...because I "didn't do anything" either.
Well, I decided to take a different approach. I researched it and sent my husband an invoice for all of my services. The prices were accurate costing for outsourcing the day to day things I took care of. Child care, cook, laundry service, doctor, housekeeper, personal assitant, accountant, taxi service...I also added sex...you get the point.
Well, my husband's invoice ended up being a crazy sum of $150,000 for the year! He started to laugh it off at first when I told him that just like any other vendor would do, if payment was not received promptly I would discontinue service. Well he laughed about it for about a week...then one morning he went to get ready for work and had no clothes to wear...then he came home and there was no dinner for him...then his cell phone was diconnected for non payment. Basically, I had stopped doing ANYTHING for HIM. I still took care of the boys, but if it had anything to do with my husband I just stopped. Let me tell you it did not take long for him to apologize to me!
I never got paid :( but I did have a new respect from my husband and he started being more sensitive to my day to day grind and my need for time to myself!
good luck
Y.