I Think My 3 Month Old Is Bored!!

I hope this doesn't come off as rude, I doubt she is bored. It sounds like you do a lot with her. I have 3 girls and they are 8, 6 and 5. She really only needs you to talk, sing, pay attention to her. The other things you do are great don't get me wrong. I just doubt that she is bored. I think you are doing a great job!!! Don't worry, I think you are trying so hard to be perfect and you are doing a lot with her. I just don't want you to go crazy trying to do so much, she doesn't need much more at her age.

What is she doing, or not doing, that makes you think she is bored? At 3 months old there is still a lot she can't do in terms of socializing, showing her feelings, etc. And she still needs a lot of rest at this age, so if she is sleeping a ot she is doing so because her body needs it. It sounds to me like you are going a lot with her. Keep it up. Something that I always thought was great fun was to watch my babies with my husband. He loved to sit in his recliner and prop his feet on the footrest so his knees were bent. He would recline the kids against his legs so they were facing them. Then he would tell them stories using very animated expressions and voices or sing to them and move their arms and legs as if they were dancing. It was fun to watch how intently they would study his face, how their expressions would change over time, and how after months of being guided they would join in with their own chatter and movements.

First off, Donna- wow! You're kind of a jerk.
B., I went through the same thought process when my daughter (who is now 14 months) was a newborn. I worried that she was not getting enough stimulation. Now that she is older and can walk, talk, actively play I see that my worry was for nothing. The best thing you can do for an infant is to give them plenty of bonding time- holding, cuddling, kissing, interaction with your face. They LOVE to watch your face and its expressions. Any activity is fine, it sounds like you are doing the right things as far as tummy time, walks outside, etc. I read to my daughter a lot as an infant which I know a lot of people think is silly, but I really do think that it helps them to develop early language skills. I agree with the previous suggestion of Gymboree, if for nothing else than to give you a chance to meet some other moms with newborns. They have a fun program and I enjoy taking my daughter and meeting other moms. In short, just relax and enjoy the downtime/cuddle time with your little one. She will be running around before you know it!

I kind of know what you mean. Even at a really young age, I could tell when I needed to change things up for my son--he'd get a little more spazzy & fussy if we stayed in one spot for more than 15-20 minutes. The best thing I can say is just change the environment a lot...do an errand, move from room to room. I had blankets set up in 3-4 different rooms with different toys and books, and another set of toys upstairs in our bedroom, so he could lay on the bed & chew on something while I did laundry. Excersaucers and jumperoos are good too once the baby is old enough for them. Turn on some music and dance with her, etc. Good luck!

I doubt she is bored! At 3 months she is probably just starting to see a little better and see everything there is to see around her. You may even be overdoing it, causing her to want to shut out what is going on around her. She probably needs dome quiet time too, naps and sleeping are still a big part of her day but becoming a little less lengthly. Relax a little Mama, leave boredom for when she's older!

B.,
I don't think you were put on this earth for the purpose of entertaining your daughter. TO love her, yes; to care for her, yes; to see that her necessities of life are provided, yes; to entertain her, no. She needs to learn to entertain herself. At 3 months of age, place her where she can watch you and then do your thing, whatever it may be: cook, clean, read a book, garden, work at home.
If you are already doing all the things that you listed, she is getting enough interaction with mom ( remember you are also feeding,diapering, putting to nap/sleep, etc.)
Let her watch the older siblings. CHildren learn a great deal by watching.
4-6 months is IMHO the most delightful age a child ever is. Enjoy the time but don't think you need to entertain her. Her entertainment is learning about how the family lives and she can figure out where she fits into that family herself. If she is never given the opportunity to learn to amuse herself, she never will learn how.

Hi B.~

As a first time mom myself (my son is now 3), I definitely know what you are saying... and my friend who has a 15 month old also said the same things. We felt like we should be doing things with them when they were infants, stimulating them all the time, but the reality is that there was only so much we could do with them (like all the things you listed), and they have a very limited ability at 3 months to respond and interact. However, it is really great for them to be exposed to all different kinds of things, even if they can't exactly engage yet.

It sounds like you are doing all the right things, and as many of the other moms said, in a few short months, your daughter will become much more engaged in your play. And I agree with the other mom who said that it is perfectly normal and ok to admit that there are times that we get bored with the long days with a baby at home. It's not saying that your child bores you, or that you aren't interested in your child, just that you are human and sometimes the long, relatively repetitive days aren't always filled with excitement. I loved every minute I spent (and spend) with my son, but I would be lying if I said that there weren't times that I got bored with our routine. That said, I also agree that it is great to have scheduled things on your calendar to get you out and about, especially with other kids and moms. That is a win-win! We did parent/child swimming (out YMCA has classes for $27 for 7 weeks, and any age can attend the parent/child class, even infants), and story hour at the library (which is free and open to the public and all ages). Just having those 2 things on the weekly schedule broke up the monotony or our weekly routine, and gave us an opportunity to see faces other than each others! And as a result, my son met his best friend, who he now has a playdate with each week, and her mom and I have become friends... so there are certainly benefits for both of you to engaging in activities outside of the home.

Have fun and enjoy your little one just being little (as I am sure you are) because you blink your eyes, and they are going to the prom... :)

I think that maybe you have the wrong expectations of what she will do at 3 months. Three month olds aren't really going to get "excited"-they still need lots of sleep at that age and they are really just discovering the world. I would say just let her do this. You are doing the right things with her. Just keep it up. Pretty soon she will really start to get into things and give you the expressions that I think you are looking for.

Although a previous poster's comment about you being bored came off really snarky IMO it may kind of be true...I know it was for me. The reality of the long day with a baby who couldn't really communicate was very "boring" at times. No harm whatsoever in admitting that. People that don't are fooling themselves. What I did was join playgroups and organized groups such as Gymboree and Music Together. I met lots of nice moms that way and my kids had fun. It was so nice to have something on our "schedule" every week.

Hi B.,

Are you bored playing with your baby?

Just want to know.

D.

I agree with the other moms that she's probably not bored, but one of the things my son liked to do a that age was "Itsy Bitsy Spider" and "YMCA" where I moved his hands like the dance. If he turns out to be a member of a Village People tribute band, I'm going to know who was to blame, lol. Anyway, anykind of movement song was a big hit.

You're doing fine, Mama. Good job!

Don't think of it as bored...think of it as content! :) Unless she's crying and anxious or something, but you're doing and awesome job with all the activities. Believe it or not, they don't need as much fiddling as we all think with the first. They like to relax. Just your loving presence and contact is the most important thing. I actually think you create a more heightened expectation of activity when you do stuff all the time. I constantly engaged my daughter in activities and stimulation, and now, at 3, yes, she's super advanced and bright, but still needs constant activity and engaging!!! My son, who, just like everyone warned me, got way less constant attention when he came along (because she was always engaging me!!!), is way better at occupying himself than she ever was. Kids have had busy parents since the beginning of time. Feel good about what you're doing, and don't worry about boring her!

I don't think she could possibly be bored! Just continue to do what you're doing--as time passes, you'll soon see her start to react more to what you're doing. Talk to her, sing to her, read to her, be goofy for her! It will get more and more fun by the month--she's still very little to expect much more at this point. Does she have a boppy gym? She might like that--my son did.

B.,
She's only been in the world for 3 months! LOL A 3-month old's favorite "toys" are usually their own hands. She's just starting to really know and understand the world around her; definitely no way she's bored

Up to when my daughter was about 8, she never used the word, "bored": she was always able to find things to do; she could come into my office and make things from paper clips, rubber bands, and tissues and play for an hour before getting into the crayons and paper for another hour. But at about age 8, she had a friend over and they came out to the kitchen and said, "We're bored!" (I thought to myself, "Aliens have taken my child!") So we sat down with a piece of paper and I guided them in brainstorming; we made two loooooong lists, "what can we do indoors" and "what can we do outdoors". I posted the paper on the fridge and the word "bored" was never again uttered in my home! I haven't been bored in 35 years.

It's not a matter of "doing interesting things" but "seeing the world as an interesting place". Think of your role as guiding your daughter to see fascinating things in her environment, engage the world and interact with it in a self-educatory way.

When you listen to music, call her attention to the different sounds, instruments, rhythms, melodies (I'm thinking of classical music rather than the typically very limited and repetitive pop music, though there's a place for that, too). When you watch a video, talk with her about what the characters might be thinking, their relationships, etc. (Yes, she's only 3 months now, but your use of words and just the sound of your voice will do a lot for her. And for you, too--it'll challenge YOU to see new things in that video or piece of music again and again.) Sing and talk to her constantly, tell her stories, tell her what you're doing (and don't use baby-talk, just talk to her--you can pretend you're the host of a cooking show! This is much better than trying to talk "to her level"--"her level" is what you make of it (which is probably why my daughter's always had a spectacular vocabulary).

This is a lovely age and goes fast; enjoy its every moment.
Best of luck.
L.

Hi B.,

Have you tried Gymboree's Play & Music Centers? There is one in Wexford and one at the Galleria Mall in Mt Lebanon. They are wonderful! I started taking my son when he was 5 weeks old and it really gave me great ideas for how to play with and interact with my child - plus a met a lot of other nice moms that way too! I highly recommend it: http://www.gymboreeclasses.com/b2c/customer/home.jsp

J.

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Join a playgroup - www.yorkadamsmommies.com/forum is a great free local one if you are in my area.

Go to the mall. I used to do this with my son,who also got bored at that age. He loved all the people and lights and stores. By the time he was talking about 8 mos he had the malls in our area color coded. He would tell me I want to go to the blue mall or the red mall. It seemed to do the trick. god luck and happy hunting for activities.