FIRST off, how far out from your wedding did you have your bachelor/bachelorette party? Maybe I'm stressing over nothing ;)
I'm really REALLY afraid our friends are trying to surprise us with some kind of bachelor/ bachelorette parties. I HATE surprises. Every time I bring it up to our friends, they all look at each other. My fiance and I have planned nothing. We're too busy. It's just not on our priority list (thank god!!)... so I'm afraid, by the looks we've bee getting, that our friends may have something up their sleeves.
Now, if they aren't planning anything, GREAT!! Woooo hoo! But if they are.... ugh! So how far out do people generally have these kinds of parties? We have 12 days left... I'm dreading this weekend because if anything, that's when it's going to be :(
PS... I've already let it be known that we decided not to do anything like this (so has my guy)... and our friends know how much we both hate surprises... BUT... I also know my friends would still do it ;)
First of all, the bride/groom don't plan their own bachelorette/bachelor parties--that's what the bridesmaids/groomsman are for. If they're planning one, just relax and have a great time!
My only piece of "sage wisdom" to give you is do not have it the night before the wedding!
We did my sisters the night before her wedding...I knew she did not want anything crazy and I respected her wishes...we seriously just went to Applebees...I got her a silly veil to wear and we all wore buttons, we had a dinner that only included my sister and I and two of our female cousins who were also in the wedding party. We had a hotel room and we had a few drinks and watched some comedy ( no idea what now, too long ago!) The big treat was really the morning before her wedding, going and getting hair and make up done and I just made sure she had anything she needed, we had a sweet brunch with some champagne.
I think your friends will likely do something, but hopefully nothing inappropriate. I really wanted to make my sister happy...making her feel awkward would not really have been nice.
Doesn't it usually happen the weekend before the wedding? Yup- good luck with that!
They might have something at a local bar - so plan on catching up on the things you eed to get done and leaving Saturday night free.
If you do have one - relax and have fun and ENJOY!!! Let go of the stress for a few hours. Your friends love you!
I'm with you.
FORTUNATELY those who actually LOVE ME (aka put my happiness above their thrill at 'surprising' me) always let me in on the 'surprise'. That way my friends can have their fun and I'm not hairy-legged-mustache-bleach-wearing-laundry-day-attired-frizzy-mess vacillating back and forth between fury and embarrassment and miserable the whole night.
Mine was about a month before. My husband's was about 2 weeks before.
I would say IF it were Going to happen it would be THIS WEEKEND!!!!!!!!!
Technically, since you suspect it might happen, it's not really a surprise (LOL)! You may have to just roll with it if it happens - they're just telling you they care by having a party. And lots of times these things are not the stereotype strip thing they used to be, so try not to worry, and enjoy the warm fuzzy intentions :)
Considering the fact that you have said that you don't want anything AND they know you don't like surprises, I would brace for a couples-night-out at the worst!
I got married out-of-state from most of my friends and family, so we did my shower/bachelorette/finalizing details all in one long weekend when everyone was in town and that was in June for a Labor Day wedding. Most of my friends with "scattered bridesmaids" did the same!
R........oh dear....
most parties like this are the weekend before the wedding instead of the day before as in "olden times..."....we don't want the bride or groom wasted or hungover for the wedding now do we??!?!
I hope your friends know this is something you do not want and thinking "me dowest thing that R. is protesting too much"...and you really do want it....????
If it happens - just go with it babe!!! Take a deep breath and jump in the pool!! All will be well!
Ah well it's not like you can stop it. Instead of dreading the possibility of it happening, count yourself lucky that you have good intuition, and give yourself more time to prepare to accept it gracefully if it does happen. R. - it might even be FUN!! And again, it won't really be a total surprise since you are half expecting it. Then if it doesn't happen, well you didn't want it anyway. :)
I had mine 3 weeks ahead of time b/c that is the date that worked for the most people. My friends told me ahead of time. A surprise would not have worked and they knew I would not like that. I am not a party person so I wasn't super excited but I did feel like it would be a fun time with my girlfriends and a right of passage. With that in mind, we went out and had a blast! I have probably never had so much fun! There were other brides to be out that night so I got to talk "wedding" with them which was nice - we all understood each other's craziness! And everyone was so nice - guys were walking up, buying us drinks, wishing me well; the deejays at places we went to would make a special announcement when they saw us, people would congratulate me, etc. Just go with it and be a good sport - the truth is, the night is really about your friends having an excuse to have a good time!!!
Wait! I thought you already had your bachelorette party?
The night before is not uncommon...
