I Dont Know What to Do About My Son's Aggressive Behavior.

There is a great counselor on Stroop Rd. in Kettering named Dr. Bruce Kline. His number is ###-###-####. He tries to treat without medication.

Hello C....

OMG...honey, I can certainly relate to you. My five year old son is the same way but instead he acts out towards others. Please seek professional help dear. We got our son into seeing a behavioral counselor at Samaritan Behavioral Youth Center. My son has been diagnosised with ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder) and he also has ADHD. They can teach you techniques in order to help your son get control over his behavior. Best of luck!

Sincerely,
M.

C.,
I agree with a lot of the other mom's suggestions on this one. I think you should seek professional help, this is not normal or healthy behavior.

God Bless
J. F

HI C.,
Definately take him to counseling. Call Childrens Hospital Behavioral CLinic...they are super! Do this before your son really hurts himself or someone (thing) else. Good Luck!

C.,
Hun, I think you need some help with your son. Talk to your pediatrician about this and see what they recommend. We have in our community a Children's Resource Center. They provide family type counseling for younger kids and worked with us on helping gain more cooperation out of our son. It was VERY nice and helped a lot. It was better than any book I had ever read or advice anyone had given. They worked with us on OUR child and not some "norm" that books talk about.

I wish you luck. I will pray you can get a handle on this now before he hurts himself or someone else.

Blessings.
M.

A 3yr old does not need therapy or counseling. They need a parent to show them the way. You do this by spankings (I know people boo at this, but it isn't teaching him hitting is right. It is teaching him that you have the power, that you are displeased,that he is not in control, not to mention it shows them hitting hurts.) Then you forcefully put them in their bedroom (which should be safe-proofed for him) and let him have it out. Buy him a punching bag, if need be. After his episode, sit down and have a heart to heart about the proper way to behave (customized for each situation) To me, it sounds like he is trying to assert dominance. He doesn't have any. He is 3. It is up to you to give him that reality check. Keep the ball in your court. Giving him attention for his bad behavior is what he feeds off of. I wouldn't allow him to pick you up anymore either, it puts you below him in the dominance category. Too many kids are put on medication for their behavior and I commend you on your efforts to solve this yourself. Some kids really do have problems, like autism, etc. You know your own child though and I am sure you could see it, if it was more than just a bad temper. Good luck, and stay tough! It will get better!

C.,
I do sympathize with you on this one. I have a 2 1/2 year old boy and we have to go through behavioral issue everyday. Yes, part of it is him just being a little boy. However, I do believe it stems deeper than that with my son. I have turned to help through Help me grow. It is free and they will come out and give you an assessment on your sons behavior. Then they will work with you and your son directly to get to the core of the problem. The Toledo, OH number is ###-###-#### and if you are closer to Columbus that number is ###-###-####. If you aren't in either area I am sure you can call and they will be more than happy to assist you with finding a closer location to your home. I hope this helps. Good luck.

I agree with Beth and Michelle...you need some help / counseling for your son. However, you mentioned he can't talk about what's wrong....does he talk AT ALL? My son was unable to talk and was VERY frustrated! (By the age of 2, my son still could not even say 'mama' or 'dada'). He only pointed and grunted or cried / screamed /hit to try and express his needs. During this period of no speech, he was very agressive and combative. We had him evaluated through Early On of Michigan (1-800-earlyon) and also our school district - BOTH recommended sign language as a more immediate resolution, and speech therapy. Once my son and I learned a couple of signs, his behavior improved dramatically - he was now able to express his needs: cookie, drink, go potty, etc. The signs were very easy for both of us to learn, and we used them succesfully for about a year. By the end of one year of speech therapy (provided FREE from the school district), he was talking to communicate his needs, instead of signing. His attitude and behaviour has only continued to improve. So, in short, your son's agressive behavior may be a result of him not being able to communicate with you - and that causes LOTS of frustrations, for everyone. Typically, by age 3, your child ought to be able to put togeter 3-4 words in sentences. Talk with your pediatrician about speech development to see if that might be part of the problem. Then, contact early on, or even the county, to see what type of family services and counseling are available. There is a lot of free help out there - you just have to dig to find it! Good luck.

have you tried taking things away from him like his favorite toys when he does this? I think i might talk to his doctor cuz he might hurt his self really bad I am sorry I cant help that much but I think you need to talk to the doctor good luck

I also have a nearly 3 year old with the same aggressive behavior. He bangs his head off the floor when he doesn't get his way and throws some of the worst tantrums I've ever seen. We just figured it's his frustration that causes his actions. He gets so upset and has no way to communicate his feelings so he manifests them in a physical manner. As long as he's not really hurting himself we ignore him, and we've told him that it's ok to get mad, but hurting himself and/or others is not acceptable. Instead we have a pillow that he is allowed to punch when he's upset. He's able to satisfy the frustrations in a controlled manner without causing any damage. It seems to be working as we haven't seen him bang his head or anything else in a month or so. As he gets older and is able to express his frustrations & anger verbally we'll phase out the pillow. Hope that helps!

Have you had him tested at all? My nephew was the same way. I always felt like some thing was not quite right but couldn't put my finger on it. That went on until he was 4. His mom finally had him tested at my urging and he has a mild form of autism. He now goes to therpy for it once a week and she has special things she does with him at home. He has done a total 180. She had it done through her local school district. I'm in Michigan, and here they are required to give students the testing that they need. Health insurance picks up the therpy. I'd contact the school system and see if they can help.

My advice to you coming from a mom who has a 12 and 14 yr old with special needs. Combined they have Aspergers, ADHD, Pdd-nos(autistically impaired)Anxiety. Your child needs to be tested and treated. Not necessarily with meds but therapy etc. My boys have been in special programs within the schools since 3 yrs old and most people dont even know they have special needs. The best thing you could do for your child right now is
early intervention. If you are in the Washtenaw county. Call the Washtenaw Intermediate school distict for help. They will help you with the steps to take to get him help. I have 3 boys in my childcare that has special needs. Two are 3 and one is 4 all of them are in programs in the public schools. This time if crucial for you to get him the help now. If you want more information please contact me I have been doing this for 12 yrs.