How to Wean an Exclusively Breast Fed Baby

Hi J.,
I am currently having a similar situation. My 4th child will be 2 in a couple of weeks and I started trying to wean him when he was 14 months. (all of my children nursed for at least a year, and the 1st 3 weaned on their own because I was pregnant with the next), but my last is still going strong at almost 2 years. When he was 14 months old, I started cutting out his daytime feedings and it worked pretty well, but then when he was about 16 months old, he got really sick with fever and didn't want to eat and all he would do was nurse, so I gave him so he wouldn't get hospitalized for dehydration and just nursed him like he was a newborn, because that's what he wanted. Well he got better and then sick 2 more times over the course of 6 months with the same problems and nursing him is what kept him out of the hospital, and here we are and he still wants to nurse all the time.
When he turned a year, I tried giving him soy milk, and he didn't like it, and then I tried cows milk, rice milk, almond milk and he wouldn't drink any of them. He also wouldn't drink water. The only other thing I could get him to drink was juice and so I had to keep it watered down so he wasn't getting too much. He is a good eater, so that was never a problem unless he was sick.
I really hope you have better success, but what I've seen, they will wean on their own and some just need a little longer. I too, did not want to nurse a toddler, but it really hasn't been that bad and he is very independent when it comes to feeding himself and cleaning up when I ask him too, and he's pointing to and recognizing letters and numbers and colors,so it hasn't had a role in his developmental stages. He's right on track.
Take care! And if you find the trick in weaning, let me know!
V.

Hi J.,

Before you give up nursing entirely, there is documented evidence that extended breastfeeding into toddlerhood has extended benefits both for baby (sick less often, less likely to develop ear infections etc.) and for mom (including increased lifelong protection from breast cancer). Here is a sample article you may want to check out: http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-benefits.html

If you can hang in there until 24 months you both will benefit greatly.

Hi J..
Have you tried eliminating the temptation of the boob at night by letting daddy get up with her and see if he can get her to take a bottle or sippy when no other food source is around? Sometimes its just about the comfort of mom. There is a definite schedule and they are all seeming to be just before or after naps... so if someone else is around, let them try to be there for one of those times to see if you can start to eliminate a nursing session if the "food source" is MIA and formula/juice/whatever is the only alternative.

Hi J.! I had the same exact issue with my daughter. She never took a bottle...and then once it was time to transition, we were a little stuck..at first. Believe it or not, at 8 months she learned to use a straw. I would put a little liquid in the end..with my finger capping it. Once she understood liquid came from a straw, magically, she learned to suck from it and drink! She also never took to sippy cups EXCEPT the born free sippy. I REALLY recommend it. They are very easy to suck from...not the hard mechanism found in many sippys (which are linked to ear infections). My daughter also didn't drink large quantities...but what can you do? Your daughter doesn't need as much liquid now, as she did when she was primarily breast fed...b/c when she was ONLY nursing, those were her only calories. I know you said she doesn't eat much..but try to get her into fruit, like watermelon, that is loaded with liquid, and she will get hydration that way too.
A. :)

Have you tried offering her different types of cups? My guy would only drink from the cups with the straws that popped up from the lid. He wouldn't put his mouth on a regular sippy cup. He was really hard to wean too. He would only go to sleep on my boob. I finally ended up going to my moms house for a few days where she helped me wean him. He just went cold turkey. She had the patience to let him fuss, and she would rock him or walk him to sleep for me. Good luck!

It's important to emphasize that there is absolutely nothing wrong with nursing a toddler. I nursed my first until she self weaned at 19 months and I nursed my second daughter well past her 3rd birthday all the while I was pregnant with my 3rd child. I understand that each woman has her "comfort" zone and you've reached yours so your decision to stop nursing your daughter, hopefully is because you genuinely want to stop and not because you feel pressured to stop by others who are not comfortable with you nursing a toddler.

With that said, I can say that taking out the first morning and last of the day nursing sessions should be the LAST to go, not the first. I slowly weaned my second daughter when I was pregnant with third baby because breastfeeding was becoming increasingly painful. I took one session away at a time, beginning with one that occured in the afternoon. My children were able to drink out of a sippy cup by 6 months, so I would encourage you to give her a sippy cup every chance you get. Fill it with water, juice, breastmilk if you pump, or even a little cow's milk. Replace each session you take away with something else like a drink from her sippy cup, or a snack, or some quality play time. IF she goes looking for your breasts because she knows it's nursing time, make your breasts difficult for her to get at. Tell her that her milk is taking a nap and you will play with her instead. Once you decide to take sessions away, it's important that you stick with it. "Giving in" here and there will only confuse her and she won't understand why she can have her mommy's milk today but not tomorrow. The hardest sessions to give up will be the first of the day and the last session of the day. You say she is waking up during the night to nurse because you believe she is hungry. She shouldn't be nursing during the night and you shouldn't be giving in. Instead, after her bath at night, prepare her a bowl of cream of wheat (also known as Farina) or oatmeal. For the Cream of Wheat, you can mix 1 tab plus 1 tea. of cream of wheat with 1/3 cup of milk. Heat it in the microwave for a minute or so and feed that to her, when it's cooled of course. If she's still hungry, feed her more! Top her off with milk in a sippy cup or nurse her, whatever you choose. She isn't too young for cow's milk...she is almost 12 months old. If after feeding her she is still waking up during the night, you have to know that she is waking up for the comfort of YOU and not for food. Now for meal food, would you consider ditching the jar baby food and opting for using a food mill to grind up her food? Why not give your daughter the food you prepare for the rest of the family? Use broth or a little water to thin it if it's too thick. I milled all of my food for my children to eat. Give her tastes of food that you eat. Don't limit what you will feed her. Heck, I milled tacos in the food mill and my children gobbled it up. Yogurts, applesauce, little pieces of pancakes, little pieces of bread with jelly or apple butter. IF she is isn't allergic to anything, the sky is the limit. Expose her to everything you enjoy eating. Good luck!

First I'd like to commend you for nursing. There is nothing wrong with nursing a child for longer. Actually the longer you nurse, the healthier your child. The World Health Organization recommends nursing till age 6. Our culture for some reason feels breasts are more for sexuality than for nourishing our children, which is unfortunate. This time goes so quickly and it's such a wonderful bonding experience as well as really the best nutrients one can give their child.

I thought I'd nurse for maybe a year and then I saw my daughter wasn't ready to stop and our journey wasn't ending. I read about extended nursing and decided the healthiest thing was to let her naturally wean as nature intended. I saw a friend nursing her 4 year old daughter and thought "freak" but as my daughter got older I saw it was wonderful not freaky. Nearing age 4 she was nursing many nights to go to sleep and that's it or for comfort occasionally. We discussed it and the night of her 4th birthday she nursed for the last time. I wanted to be able to remember the day. I still miss it and she's nearly 7.
Savor the experience as long as you can. It's the BEST thing you can do for her.

In peace,

My daughter was the same way. I did nurse her until she was about 14-15 months and I got a very bad infection. Bad enough that I was put into the hospital, put on very strong IV drugs and that forced us to stop cold turkey. Just a few things to think about.

1 - The 1st 3 days were hell for my husband who was home with her. But after the 3rd day she got better and better every day after.
2 - You need to be prepared for ALOT of pain. Get cabbage. The nurses in the hospital went to the store for me and put it in the fridge for me to put on my breast and they would wrap my chest...But not to tight.
3 - When I got home it was a fight with her to stay away from the breast. She would try to pull my shirt down and nurse. That was very hard for me. Because that was our time. Our bond!

Good Luck!

I think it great that you nursed your baby for so long. What about the three year old? Perhaps she can sit with the baby and have a cup of juice or milk together. Make it a fun experience. Breast-feeding is such great bonding; but when it's time to wean, it's time to have patience, introduce new routines, and enjoy the moments! They don't last forever.
Blessings, S.

The recommended way is to take 1 feeding away per week. I personally took one away every 1 to 2 weeks. I took away the before bedtime 1st and had my husband put her to bed. I took away the before nap time last. The last nursing I took my breast out of her mouth...covered it...and said to her that I Love Her, but Mommy can't do this anymore. Good Luck!

Hi Sahm
I had a simmilar problem with my daughter.
She was exclusivly breastfed and refused to give the boob up. But I did get her to wean and so can you.
Here is what I did.

First (before reducing feedings) I got her used to using a sippy cup or straw. She did really well with the camelbak water bottle with the bit down tip.
Then, I started to cut a breast meal back, all along the same time, I continued with solids.
This continued until she was only breatfeeding at night.
Then cam night time weaning. Once this was successfull I stoped the middle of the night feeding and substituded with milk.
Once she was eating a pretty good meal I changed the middle of the night milk to water.

Durring this, she cried a lot!! especially durring the night weaning. But Once she was weaned she started eating lots of her solid and started to sleep through the night.All of the changes was about 2weeks to a month apart.

I guess you can try to substitue a pasifier but know that you might be woken up at night when the pasi fallout.

oh btw, durring the change she woke up a lot at night too but that too stoped once the weaning was complete. I was as sleep deprived as a newborns mother. But now she goes to sleep at 8ish and I have freedome till 12!!!
good luck!!

I would increase the food, give WATER in a sippy or even a straw cup and go from there-
I worked towards keeping TWO nursing times- right before bed and first thing in the a.m.-
I had this done by 12 months and then by 15 months we were done(longer than you say you want, but it was 'only' first thing in am & right before bed, so it's not like anyone was watching, LOL!)
when I gave up a session, I replaced it w/ a snack of yogurt or cheese-so let's say you nurse at 10:00 am- sit her down at that time w/ a snack of yogurt or cheese and fruit-
it can take time...
just adress one nursing session at a time...
and work on getting REAL food into her- food from your plate! she's 11 months so she can eat most everything off of your plate! beans, rice, cheese, meats, poultry, pasta, veggies, fruits-
my second one did NOT want babyfood so we just gave REAL food-
my first one didn't drink milk from a cup until about 18 months...but ped said it was ok- he ate lots of cheese and yogurt and broccoli and I added organic blackstrap molasses (has a lot of calcium and iron!)to a LOT (baked squash, oatmeal, baked sweet potato fries, pancakes, waffles, toast, everything!)and he was being nursed 2x a day to 15 months.
you'll make it!