How to Tell 8 y.o. About Santa...

7-8 is old enough for them to have realized that there are quite a few "Santas" walking around retail places before Christmas.... We started a bit earlier 5-6 telling my girly that these were all helping Santa out cause he wanted to visit with as many kids before Christmas while they were awake.... these days....

so .... When she got to be about 7-8 we let her "share" in BEING a special friend, like a santa for someone else. Toys for tots etc... The next year, she looked forward to being santa again, and santa just rolled into A "Santa" instead of THE santa..... Told her that as you get older you can help the little ones see how magical "santa" is, but in order to keep it magical for them, lets' pretend we don't know that we help santa and do the gift giving sometimes. (we gave santa gifts til she was in college, and still throw in little santa gifts). With this we preserved santa for little ones, and in a way never hit her on the head with the BAMB of "honey there is no santa" She still had wonderment for a few years, knowing that it was us, but being glad that she could still pretend.

I let my daughter come to me......then I told her that I could only tell her the truth if she promised to keep it a secret and not tell her siblings or her friends (I explained that it was up to her friends' parents to explain it to them). After she "pinky promised" then I told her the truth but then followed it with, "But, one thing you should think about is that when you stop believing, then you stop receiving!" We laughed and she to this day will still tell you, "OH - I still believe in Santa!" Kids have to grow up so fast these days.....don't take Santa away from them until they come and ask you... And, the first few times I was asked, I said, "Well, what do YOU think?"

Find the "Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus..." letter, and y'all read it together! On a less enlightened note, I remember being told, as the eldest in a family which included very young siblings, that I was NOT to mess up the little kids' fun, and Santa wouldn't visit me if I did! (Although he would continue to visit them...self-interest won out)

Childhood is short enough for our kids these days let them believe as long as possible. I have 3 kids 11, 8 and 6. My 11 almost 12 year old still believes and I am grateful for that innocence. Even though her peers have let the cat out of the bag so to speak we have managed to keep it going by telling her he only comes to those that believe in the magic. Believing in magic and fairy tales is a part of childhood innocence it does not take away from their faith in religion. As they grow older and understand more they will learn the difference between makebelieve and faith. In our home Santa is more like the 3 wise men, he only brings 3 gifts to each kid. Let them believe for as long as possible and enjoy the magic with them.

Why tell him? We have a 12 year old and a 3 year old. I don't ever intend to tell them Santa is not real. My parents never told me Santa was not real. Yes, I still believe Santa is real:) We are also a Christian family that teaches the true meaning of Christmas but why take this fun part away? It is a fun game you can play with your children. It keeps the magic of childhood alive. My daughter asked me one time if Santa was not real. I simply told her that I certainly do not get up in the middle of the night to put presents under the tree. She has never asked again.

Lisa

Just wanted to toss in my .02. I believed until I was twelve. Actually, I still believe.

I heard Santa one night when I was 24. My husband and I were living in married student housing while he was in grad school. I worked at a department store and had been working incredibly long hours. December 24th that year was a crazy day at work and then one of the customers I helped looked up my number in the phone book in order to call me at midnight to ask if he'd left his keys at my register.

Anyway, I was just going to sleep when I heard sleigh bells. I thought "How cute. Someone's ringing bells for their kids." Then something thump-thumped on the roof of our building.

Childhood is so short. Continue with your lessons about Jesus and the religious reasons for Christmas. Encourage your kids to donate to Toys for Tots or the Austin Food Bank. But I also say leave it alone until she asks. Or, she'll just figure it out on her own and then not want to make you feel sad that she's growing up.

Merry Christmas!

My kids went through the same thing. Our (my husband and myself) response has always been that those kids parents do something totally different. At our house we always go and pay santa and he brings the gifts to our house. The other parents must not do that, they must be buying the gifts themselves. It helped for a while and even then I never admit to buying anything. They are 17 and 14 and know the difference but I'll never admit to anything. Whenever we are going shopping for christmas, I make sure they stay home and I tell them we are going to pay santa and we'll be back. They simply smile and tell me to tell Santa that they've been really good all year, I smile and remind them he's always watching.

What do you mean Santa's not real? :) If you think about it, Santa is really just a symbol for God. Young children (and some adults for that matter!) have a hard time believing in something they can't see, so Santa is just a way for them to learn about generosity, and get excited about Jesus' birthday of course.

Sing the song "Santa Claus is coming to town" with her. The song is really just a child's version of the Advent season and getting ready for Jesus' arrival on Christmas Day. ("He sees you when you're sleeping, He knows if you're awake, He knows if you've been bad or good . . .")

Santa is definitely a big deal in our house, but we also compare him to Jesus/God often. As my children get older I'm sure their reasoning skills will kick in and they will realize that Santa is just a magical and fun symbol that young children use to help them understand God's love for us. As their faith in God grows stronger, they won't have a need for the magical symbol anymore, but they'll also know that its not something I've hidden from them or lied to them about. Santa shouldn't have to be a "lie" that has to be revealed.

I hope your family has a very blessed and magical Christmas!

Hello A.,

We finally told our oldest daughter the truth last year when she was 10. She was one of the last in her class who still beleived in Santa. She had questioned it the year before but we were able to get around it. Finally, she just came out and asked, "Is Santa real?". I told her no but explained that she now has a responsibility to keep the secret for the children who still believe. I was very worried she would spill the beans to her younger sister but she has actually enjoyed the secret and is very careful about it.

It is difficult to balance Christian beliefs with the love of Santa. Each Christmas, I pull out a figurine of Santa bowing at the Manger. It keeps things in perspective.

Something else... the motto in our household is "If you don't believe, you don't receive." I honestly can't tell you if my boys (11 and 9) "believe" in Santa or not but they've never said anything to the contrary.

We also have our own personal Elf "Ferguson" that shows up each year and reports back to Santa each night. Ferguson has been coming to our house for almost a decade. He was sent to us by one of his "cousin elves" to be our personal Elf. They have come out with a book called "Elf on the Shelf" (boy, I wish I had done that) that follows the same basic philosophy. The boys were with me today as I bought one for a friend's new baby and I basically told them that Ferguson suddenly has a lot of cousins. They were still shocked when we got home and our own Ferguson was sitting on the deer's head in our living room.

So basically, why say anything at all to your child. The world's going to let them down enough in this world. Let the magic live.

I told my daughter about Saint Nicholas, and that yes he was real and that the spirit of giving lives on today in all of us. We received the most precious gift in Jesus Christ, and we give gifts to each other to pass that love around.

Why tell her until she asks? Children grow up soo fast these days why not let her believe as long as she can. It is inevitable that she will figure it out because of friends and other outside influences, but let that run it's course in my mind. My oldest is still 6, so I have a while to worry about this, but I can tell you that our neighbors with 3 children had to deal with this exact issue with their oldest son a year or so ago and although he was very dissappointed he was more than willing to go along for the younger children when mom and dad talked to him...but in this instance, he began to ask questions about whether Santa was real. He was 10 yrs old, so I think you can probably enjoy a year or 2 more of the "Santa excitement" in your household.

My 10 (almost 11) year old still believes. But I know that once she figures it out, her 8yo sister will know by the end of the day. So we are just enjoying it one more year at a time. There is no reason to rush "growing up"!

My 8 y.o. daughter just asked me if santa was real. She figured it out on her own. I explained to her that the birth of Jesus is why we really celebrate Christmas. I also asked her to remember how fun it was to think that there was a santa and asked her to consider her 4 y.o. little brother and not tell him about it so he can have fun too while we pretend that there is a santa. I told her to go along with me in pretending so we don't spoil it for her little brother so he won't get sad and he'll have fun too. I hope this helps! Merry Christmas!

This is about the age my oldest two were 'wise' to the Santa game. We decided never to lie to them if they straight out asked, but this is the age when they came straight out with something like, "I don't think Santa is real, and this is why..." We explained, when they truly seemed to want to know, that Santa is a game we like to play, and its been allot of fun for them, so lets not ruin that fun for our little brother or sister. Make them feel like they are on the parents side of the game now and they get to help play the game for the younger ones.

I have a 14 and 19 year old daughters. I never told them anything. They learn everything at school and not from teachers. After they figured it out, I told them that when they stop believeing, they stop getting gifts. They learned the real meaning of Christmas though church.

As a Christian, I never taught my children about Santa. The tv and school did that and I just never made a big deal about it. I just always made sure that they knew that Jesus was the reason for the season, and not Santa. After reading some of the reponses, I asked my 18yr old and 15 yr old if they ever felt "deprived" because they never beleived in Santa. They both responded "its no big deal" It never affected them; they are both giving and loving children. I asked my 7 year old and she says that she knows that Mom and Dad give all the gifts.She says she likes hearing stories about Santa but she knows he is not real, and I taught them to not spoil the fun for other kids. Basically what we are telling our children is a BIG lie when we tell them that Santa brings gifts, etc. Its fine to tell them the story about Saint Nicholas, but thats where it should end. Pretty soon, we will have to be explaining the "Easter Bunny" and anything else that gets in the way of the truth: Jesus!
The only thing that bothers me about this whole thing is when people ask my children: "What did Santa bring you?" why not ask: "What did you get for Christmas?"

Childhood is so short. Why spoil the magic if your child wants to believe? When she asks in the future I'd just do what you did before and ask her if she believes in Santa. If yes, then let her enjoy it. If she says no, then you can let her know it's really just a fun folk legend for small children and enlist her help in keeping the magic alive for the little brothers and sisters.
Have fun!

I am 34 and my parents have never told me the "truth" about Santa. I did figure it out when I was about 7 though. The rule in our house was that if you stopped believing then he stopped coming to see you. He still leaves me things in my stocking over at my dad's house. My 10 and seven year old both still believe.
The magic in Santa is not the elf himself, it is the love of giving and the spirit of Christmas that he symbolizes. As far as I am concerned he is very much alive!

My mom also still tells me Santa is real.It makes everyone smile, and its fun and lets everyone there enjoy it. She signs presents from Santa and everything. We are also Christian, and celebrate the true meaning of Christmas every single year we bake a cake in celebration of the Christ birth, and pray before opening presents. I think as long as your daughter understands the true meaning, and has fun believing in Santa, then its fine to let it be for now.
I love the holiday because of our traditions both Christian related, and Santa related.

While Christmas shopping a few years ago, I saw a book about St. Nicholas. I didn't purchase it at the time, so I don't remember the title. It was beautifully written and illustrated, and told the story of St. Nicholas' life, and how his true history evolved into the fictional story of Santa Claus. If you could google St. Nicholas, you could probably find many resources about him, possibly even the book I saw.

I think telling your daughter the history of St. Nicholas, and the role he played in the church, would be a good place to start. She could learn that he was a real person, a good and holy person, and that the story of Santa Claus was made up about him. You could then explain that unlike the fictional Santa Claus, St. Nicholas died many years ago, but his legend lives on.

We raised our children without Santa Claus. We told them that the story of Santa Claus is a lovely story, and a game that many families play, but that it wasn't true. But, since it was something some families enjoyed, it would be cruel to ruin it for them, by telling the secret. So, as far as I know, my children never spilled the beans to their peers, they just enjoyed the game when it was appropriate. I'm sure your daughter would understand that it wouldn't be nice to spoil the game for her younger sibling, if you put it to her in those terms.

I have two boys and when my oldest was 10 we told him the story of Saint Nicholas and told him how he was a real person, but parents carried on the tradition and we told him that it was a special gift not to say anything to his younger brother until he was 10. It worked out. My grandmother told me once that if you don't make it an issue and make it like a gift and it was special it would be easier. She said that's what she did with her boys she had 3. We celebrate Jesus birthday and we celebrate the good of a man named Saint Nicholas, Santa Clause. Good Luck! :)

Hi A. ~ As a Christian family, we wondered the same thing. Like some of your other responses, we decided to tell the St Nicholas story, so yes there is a Santa... and use this story to instill the gift of giving in your child. My child went back to school and told the other kids, 'you believe what you want, I believe what I want. I bet I have more fun at Christmas'. To this day, she is the most generous and giving young lady. My son is the same way. Every year, they took the toys that they didnt play with, gently used toys and we took those to the Salvation Army, Women's Center, etc. Now, we adopt several needy families in our neighborhoods and we leave the presents and a full meal at their church with their names. We have never told anyone we do this because it is not about getting recognized for it, but for sharing what God has blessed to our family.

I just sort of realized it naturally. Certain things didn't make sense as years went by. Once I caught my oldest sisters( by 17 years ) husband eating Santa's cookies and called him on it. He looked caught and said he would replace them. I stayed up some that Christmas Eve thinking about it and questioned things in my mind. Ultimately my older brother (by 3 years)blew it for me, but really I already suspected.

I think it is easy for almost all kids to come to a realization on their own especially since different families handle the subject differently and kids at school talk.

My now 12 year old's Kindergarten teacher gave what I think is the best plan I have ever heard. They all profess to believe in Santa. The biggest, best gift every family member gets each year is from Santa. Santa will not bring you a gift if you do not believe. Don't dare be caught stating that you don't think Santa is real or you won't get a gift from him and then you will only get the gifts from others which never have been as good. Do you want that? Of course not. So all of her 5 children profess to believe, even the 1 in college and the 2 in high school. Even if the kids talk amoungst themselves the next younger one realizes not to do anything other than talk highly of Santa. Who knows when each of them figures it out and it really doesn't matter cause they all get to continue to have fun anyway.

So I did this with mine (now 12 and 8) and so now I don't get any questions form the older one. She obviously knows but plays along. Even if we talk without the little around I still do not speak any differently about the topic. The little one has questioned a couple of times but you can really see the cogs turning. She doesn't push it. I make it fun, take pictures with Santa, leave cookies and carrots, leave an old skeleton key on the door nob with a red ribbon because Santa can make it work and we don't have a chimney. Whatever makes it exciting. Last year Santa left some unwrapped Christmas/Santa books under the tree. 3 were holiday recipes and 2 were stories in collectible bindings. Last Christmas Eve we ran out of time to bake homemade cookies so we left store bought ones. I did that on purpose because there was a special book that Santa left under the cookie plate. The book is called Santa's Favorite Cookies and only 1 of the store bought cookies had a bite out of it. Both girls noticed and laughed embarrased that Santa didn't like the cookies they left. We didn't have a table for the cookie plate so we used a paper box and put a table cloth on it in front of the tree. All the unwrapping was done and the kids noticed that Santa had not brought mom or dad anything. They said we had been bad and laughed at us. Well, we started to clean up and when the girls moved the table/box that the cookies were on they found it was heavy and opened it. There were 2 presents from Santa to us parents. They were wowed at the sneekiness of it all.

We are a Christian family and God is in everyday of our lives. I have had conversations with others that feel that there is a conflict between the true meaning of Christmas and Santa Claus. I don't see it. I have never heard a reasonable argument for not letting children have this type of fun. Some say it takes away from Christ and the true meaning of Christmas. It didn't for me and I can't see that it does for my kids. They both have independently professed their personal belief and faith in Christ and got Baptized. The youngest can explain the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit better than most adults. Her understanding of deep issues suprises even me and that is not easy. She certainly can deliver a prayer better at 8 than I could.

They get $ from the tooth fairy and we hunt Easter eggs. All the extended family kids stuff and color the eggs themselves. The adults hide them. The kids hunt. Lots of fun and no harm. I think these type of fantasy stories help them see that all the scary talk about halloween characters isn't true. They saw through the Easter Bunny very early and that was the plan. Them seeing that the Easter Bunny commercials and kids shows and commercialized toy stuff is all around something that is just make believe makes them not scared of or think about vampires, ghosts, warewolves, and whatever even remotely being real. Santa Claus soon follows but we get to have happy, clean, fun and wear Santa hats.

God Bless

We are also a Christian Family and I teach my son the real reason for Christmas and talk about the birth of Jesus Christ. The season is not for receiving, it for giving. My son is 9 yrs old and kids in school have told him many times that "Santa" is not real. But in all reality he is, you are alive and you make it happen for your children. I’m 45 and I believe! You must believe to receive and that’s what I tell my son when he asks questions. Think about the statement. “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, [f] that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16

In all honesty, I've never told my children there was a Santa Claus. The school and tv shows taught them that. Every gift under the tree says from Mom and Dad (or another family member). I never told them the "truth" until my children turned 8 (3rd grade). I sit them down and I tell them that they are old enough to be trusted, with this information. I tell them that there was a man name St. Nicolas. He gave gifts to children because God gave the greatest gift of all which is His son Jesus. Jesus came to this world to die for our sins and all we have to do is receive Him. So that we may have eternal life with him. So parents, family and friends keep that tradition going. We set aside Dec 25th to celebrate Jesus' birth. That is the true meaning of Christmas. Not gifts, Santa Claus, reindeers or anything else except Jesus. We have so much to be thankful for because Jesus provides our family with enough money to buy you gifts because He loves you. My children totally accept what I told them. They don't care that Santa doesn't exist because they are still blessed on Christmas. I also tell told them that they are NOT allow to tell their younger siblings because they aren't old enough to understand. So far so good. I've told 3 of them and I have 2 more to go. The older ones don't say anything to the younger ones. Hope this helps :)

Dear A.,
This might be a great opportunity to give her the "Firstborn Advantage." Raise her up to the leadership team. Tell her you are going to let her in on a secret that only the "leadership team" knows about.
Read "The Firstborn Advantage" by Kevin Lehman, found in a Christian bookstore.
J.

I figured it out when I was 8 right after Christmas. I had been wondering why Santa had not brought me the only thing I had really wanted. It was January when I asked if I had been bad. She said no, why are you asking. I told her I had realy wanted a watch. My mother had forgotten to put it under the tree.
I asked her about Santa and she told me the truth. She said that as long as a person believed then they could receive! I asked if she believed and she said yes, so the next year, I was her Santa. I loved it. I was also able to help with my younger sister. It was so fun.

To tell all of you the truth, by 3rd grade, most kids know the truth, they just do not want to ruin it for their parents.

I too came from a Christian family and one year when I was about 5 or 7 I asked my mom if Santa was real and she pulled me aside and told me...I was so hurt! That ruined it for me...let it go as long as it can all that your husband said is good enough...she will soon figure it out. I also think she would keep that a secret since that is so fun about Christmas! Please don't spoil it....she will soon know all on her own! If she still believes then let it be...it is so fun!

Just for fun, Google "Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus." I don't know if my dad had read that but he probably had. Before Christmas we used to have a magical time at our breakfast table. Daddy always read us a daily devotional and then we had pleasant family conversation with occasional reminders to my sister and me that we needed to finish our breakfast and finish getting ready for school. Invariably, Daddy would see a one of Santa Clauses brownies peeking in at the window but he always disappeared before my sister and I could see him. Daddy would tell us he was pretty sure the brownie would take a good report back to Santa.
I don't remember how old I as when I told Daddy that someone had tried to tell me there wasn't a Santa. Daddy just said that as long as I believed in Santa, he would come to put gifts under our tree but if I didn't believe in Santa, he may not come. He said it was sad for those who didn't believe in Santa. So, that became my reply to anyone who tried to tell me there was no Santa.
Then, the most fun came when I got to be Santa for someone else. Daddy always remained a truth-teller to me and I never worried that we lived a little bit in a fanciful world at our house.

B., one with great memories to share

Merry Christmas A.. I am from a Christian family and my own family is also Christian, even our daughters who are 10 yr. old and 8 yr. old. Both of mine still believe. As long as they now the true meaning of Christmas, this Santa part is just allowing them to be children and enjoy that magical time. Kinda like playing princess and fairy tales. My Mother let my sister help out to "keep the secret " once she found out. I hope you decide to let her believe till she truly finds out. Our children grow up so fast, let them be childlike for as long as possible. God Bless your family!

The first Santa and Mrs. Claus had no children of their own, so they "adopted" the neighborhood kids and gave because God blessed them with wealth. Tell that story instead of going thru the whole world in one night bit. My kids are 17 and 14. I've always told them (same with Easter Bunny) that when you don't believe, the magic's gone and they don't come anymore. You don't have to offer any other explaination.

Don't press the issue unless your children ask. My 11 year old **wants** to believe. ... I think to get more presents... ;-)

When my older one pressed it, I gave her the "Yes, Virginia" answer because I **truly** believe that the SPIRIT of "Santa Claus" really does exist. As a Christian, we experience it every day in shared charity and love.

http://www.newseum.org/yesvirginia/

Does Santa exist? OF COURSE! He lives in YOU!!! Continue the spirit of Christian love with someone in need and you, too, can be a "Santa Claus".

The policy at our house (and mine growing up ) is "If you believe then he will come. If you don't believe in Santa, then he won't come see you." No one at my house has ever asked and I have never told. My older (by 6 years) brother let it slip about the bikes we had just gotten for Christmas being over at the neighbors house when I was 8 or 9 and I remember being crestfallen....but my parents always kept up with Santa until we started our own families (and even then sometimes- as needed.) I did have a couple of my oldest child's friends mention in our van with our younger girls present that their parents are Santa which always gets them a "You don't believe? Well, then your parents must be doing it for you to be nice because Santa only comes to those who believe. And I Believe in Santa." It is the joy of giving without expecting anything in return. The joy of seeing your kids get things that they think Mom and Dad would not allow or buy. It is the joy of tangibly spreading good will just for the fun of it. While not being terribly religious myself- I have to think that is an attitude that God would approve of and probably wishes was around more the whole year through. And once the older kids do know for sure- they usually enjoy the thrill of a big person secret enough to keep it to themselves. It is the kids (friends) who do not have younger siblings that you have to watch out for......

Hi A.,
What a sad thing it is when a childs dreams are destroyed. We raised 12 children and it was always a challenge at Christmas time between the older ones and the younger ones- but somehow the joy of Santa was not destroyed in our home. But, we are also a Christian family and we always strived to let out children know the truth-without shattering their dreams of childhood.

Most of the time our children just came to the realization of Santa- ie: could he really get down the chimmney?? and how could he possible visit the whole world in a single nitetime.....or with me when I was actually between 8 or 9 it finally dawned on me that "reindeer could not fly" and I think I was a little slow.......hahahah
Your husband probably did the right thing with your child- she will learn soon enough what is real and what is not. Let her believe as long as she wants to- as long as she knows that Jesus is her real and true source.
Have a Merry Christmas and a Blessed New year

We are facing that ourselves with our 8 year old. We decided to wait to see if he asks and ask him about what he thinks. When he does figure it out, we will get him in on the "secret" for his little brother and make him a part of the fun. I'm sure your daughter will love helping him put out cookies and write a note or whatever you do. She can also stay up a little later to help put them out. I have friends who have older kids who still believe or at least don't admit to knowing so I don't want that fun to end until it has too.

Well, my policy has always been that if you don't believe in Santa, then he doesn't have to bring you anything! I actually overheard my 10-year-old daughter telling an un-believing friend the other day that if you don't believe in Santa then all he leaves you is socks and underwear...I have NO idea where she got that but it was hilarious! I may adopt that one for my own use!

Your girl will figure it out on her own in time (as will your son eventually), and personally I think that figuring it out on their own is easier than being told. I'm pretty sure mine already knows, but even though she'll give me that knowing look every now and then, she has so much more fun continuing on with the magic. I bet yours will have fun as well continuing on with the magic for her brother. Also, if you never really tell them, they are never required to stop believing! So have a magical, merry Christmas!

Dear A.,

Here is how I explained Santa to my little ones (4,3,2): He is a wonderful character in a story(who does have many good qualities) and it is fun to pretend that he is real. They have a great time pretending, but at the same time the know that it is just a story. The best of both worlds. Your daughter is old enough to understand and help keep the mystery for your younger child at the same time.

In our family we focus on Jesus's birthday. I ask the kids what they would like to give baby Jesus as a present(it is usually what they would like themselves). If the kids have tried hard to behave then Jesus will share the presents. We bake Him a gingerbread cake too.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Ok I will tell you my story, which is just as vivid to me now at 49 as it was back when I was 8 yrs old! I was either a couple of weeks from turning 8 or perhaps 9. But some kid at school told me that there was no Santa, and I was devestated! I came home and asked my mother. She gave me the correct answer..she said " as long as you believe in Santa, you will get presents from him, when you stop believing, you will no longer get presents from him". That was true, because when I stopped believing the presents stopped too. but that year I did still believe. I believed so hard, because i wanted a great big chalk board on an easel so i could play school teacher. Well it was Christmas eve, and I had already gone to bed, and fallen asleep, something woke me up! I got out of bed, and went into the living room, and do you know what I saw? I saw Santa claus! I saw him with my imagination, because I believed so much! He looked like a little animated figure sitting in his sleigh with his reindeer, and he flew right through the wall, out of my living room! He was waving at me as he left. I 'm sure it was probably a picture of something I saw on a christmas card, but it was so real to me! I told my mom as she entered the living room, but she of course thought that I made the whole thing up! It wasn't till I was about 16 or 17 that I was able to convince her that i really did see Santa, even if it was in my imagination! well i got my great big chalk board, it stood about 5 feet tall, and about 5 feet wide., And I did play school teacher ...a lot! You should never squelch your childs imagination or dreams! She will figure out on her own when she is ready. but for now let her believe. Tell her what My mom told me, it's not a lie! You really do get presents from Santa untill you stop believing! Blessings

I guess I will have to reveal myself as "Scrooge." I have never taught my sons that Santa was real. As a born-again Christian, I teach my sons about Jesus. They can't see Him, but He is real and He sees them. If I tell them about Santa, I basically give him the same attributes as Jesus: you can't see him, he sees you, etc. Then when it comes time to tell them Santa is not real, they could also assume that Jesus is not real.

We have a wonderful time at Christmas with a tree, gifts and lots of family-time. It is the "most wonderful time of the year" for my children. I do not "deprive" them of the holiday season. We watch Rudolph, etc.

I apologize if I have offended anyone. We choose to take this stand in our home.

I pray you have wisdom in this matter.

Just like below, my mom never told me Santa was not real!! LOL, she still tells me that Santa comes. It is a fun part. We are Christians, and, we do celebrate the true meaning of Christmas first, but, it is fun to stuff the stockings and feed the rheindeer the rheindeer food the night before. Also, the making the cookies for Santa and the surprises on their faces!!! I will probably do the same as my mom, and, never say the truth. Sure, they will figure out eventually, but, I will still play Santa forever, just like my momma does!!!

Hi A.,
We were in the same boat when our DS was 10. He believed in Santa on the same basis as a miracle. He trusted us because we are his parents. He was the most difficult to tell--he took it hard and was sad about it for a long time. He then began to wonder if other things were untrue that we told him. Perhaps we waited too long. I wanted us to be the ones to tell him because kids would have ridiculed him unmercifully for being a baby. He was so easily humiliated. We told him that it was a secret surprise for children to make their dreams of magic come true. That it was fun for the parents/grandparents to all be part of making a child's wishes and imagination realized. That we never meant it as a deception, but a surprise. We told him that we would never tell him an untruth again. We reminded him how much fun and magic it was for him and how many exciting memories he had of Santa, that we needed his help to continue that tradition for his little sisters. Think how disappointed if they were little and didn't get to enjoy those special surprises that he enjoyed for years. Since he was a big brother, he could be like one of Santa's elves. So he got promoted and we used many of his ideas. That soothed him to see their excitement and know that he provided the ideas and got to be a secret Santa.
HTH C.

I would wait. She will figure it out, and the fun of Santa is so short these days, why spoil the fun? She may already "know". I asked my mom one year for the truth about Santa after the kids at school told me Santa wasn't real. I was so disappointed that Christmas. I plan to let my son believe in Santa as long as possible. Even after he figures it out he'll still get Santa presents, so I feel that carrying on the spirit & tradition of Santa is fine. My mom still gives us presents from Santa, and I give my husband a present from Santa each year. So if you look at it that way, Santa is real. He's alive in each of us who give at Christmas & part of the spirit of Christmas. I'll always believe in that & I'm 32. :) My aunt told her boys that as long as they believed in Santa, there would always be a Santa & I like that policy. Best wishes to you & your family for a Merry Christmas!