How to Get Rid of the Pacifier???!!! - Huntingtown,MD

Updated on March 28, 2009
J.D. asks from Huntingtown, MD
11 answers

Until recently, my 17month little princess only used the pacifier at bedtime to sleep. We were going to get rid of it earlier (wish we did) but she moved into a "big girl bed" and we didnt want to do to much. (we had to because she was climbing out of the crib). Now, she wants the "bink" a lot more at home and will have tantrums and cry. We rarely give in, but I must admit that we do at times. She doesn't use the bink at daycare-at all. Should I get rid of it all together? If so, how?

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So What Happened?

Thank you to everyone for your excellent suggestions. It really helps to know you are not alone. I think I will take a bit of advice from all. She is teething and it seems to really be bothering her. This may be why she is so "Bink Obsessed". So, bink at bedtime/car only. Once her teething issues resolve... I may attempt to "hide the bink"! Thank you all!!!!

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L.R.

answers from Washington DC on

Take a look at the Feb. 10 Mamasource posting by Heather who also had a question about taking away pacifiers. A lot of people responded to her -- you might find answers there.

If your daughter very recently transitioned to a bed she might still need the pacifier at nights to comfort her (you're right not to do too many changes at the same time) but I'd stand firm on no daytime "binks" if you've already begun that. Whenever you cave in on that and give her one, it sends her a very mixed signal and since she's so young she'll only think that getting a bink once means she can get it by crying the next time too. Ignoring the tantrum, even walking out of the room if she's in a safe area and can't hurt herself, can work eventually. Consistency is key (but oh so hard, I know!). Another tactic when she asks for a daytime pacifier: Ignore it and immediately distract her with a toy, game, going outside, etc. Distraction is a perfectly acceptable option at this age!

A thought: If a new baby is on the way you may want to break the pacifier habit before the new baby comes, because if you wait too long the baby will be here and your older child will want comfort and routine amid the big change of a new baby in the house. If that routine still includes the pacifier, it'll be very tough to take it away from her at that time.

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S.H.

answers from Washington DC on

we just got rid or our pacifiers, which we called NUKs (the brand name). our boy/girl twins just turned three and we decided it was time. they were only using them on the occassional fussy night, or after an emotional outburst. a fellow twin mom gave me the idea of using the NUK fairy, like the tooth fairy. we talked about it for a few days prior and then i asked them if they wanted to do it on night A or night B. they chose the night and in the middle of the night i went into their rooms and took the NUKs that had fallen out of their mouths. i had purchased two neat little lunch boxes from Party City and filled them with little things like a hair brush for her and a watch for him, whistles, mini-m&ms, etc. after they came downstairs in the morning, i went up and put them under their pillows and after breakfast i asked them if they had remembered to put their NUKs under their pillows and had they checked to see if the NUK fairy had visited. it was a success. later that week, we saw a little girl with my daughter's exact NUK and i said, "oh look, the NUK fairy gave that little girl your NUK! Now she's happy because of you!". She thought that was great and 'brags' about it from time to time. i truly wouldn't stress out about the use of the pacifier. i felt it helped my twins deal with their emotions on their terms, giving them a chance to calm down when they were upset or worried. it's a whole lot better than the thumb! if you have a new little one coming into your world (we have a 6-month old addition), then i would really consider holding off on the end of the pacifier. my kids needed theirs with the new family adjustment and it helped them get a grip. just a thought...congrats, and good luck.

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D.M.

answers from Washington DC on

I am not sure your daughter is old enough to understand this - but my sister in law thought of a great idea that worked with her daughter, and I will be using it soon for my son....

The Paci or Bink Fairy! You can start telling her now that at 2 yrs the Bink Fairy will come and take her binks away to get them ready for another little baby. The bink fairy leaves a nice present for the children who let them go. My niece was 4 when this took place, so I am not sure if it will work with your daughter now. but might be worth a try!

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E.E.

answers from Washington DC on

My toddler kept telling me that paci's are for babies. So when i got pregnant she kept saying and we kept saying that she was going to give all the paci's to the baby. She did- quit cold turkey!! Hopefully you can convince her to do the same.

L.C.

answers from Washington DC on

Hello,
We had a rule - you want to use the binky, you have to be in your room. No binky outside the bedroom. Trust me, that works wonders.

To get rid of it, cut the end off the nipple part.
It makes it most unpleasant to suck on.

YMMV
LBC

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T.A.

answers from Washington DC on

Without knowing your personal beliefs, I hope I am not stepping on your toes(or anyone else who reads this). My sister-in-lsw had triplets. She took the pacifiers in the Spring at Easter time. She mentioned the Easter Bunny had recently had babies & needed the kids pacifiers for them. The triplets happily set out their pacifiers, and the Easter Rabbit traded them for the baskets the next morning. As luck would have it, they had baby bunnies in their yard later that month. The kids enjoyed watching them & often argued over which bunny was using which pacifier. Hope this helps.
Good Luck
T.

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K.J.

answers from Washington DC on

We cut the nipple off and told her it was broken. Worked like a charm!

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C.B.

answers from Washington DC on

My four kids were all pacifier babies and I waited way too long to get rid of them with 3 of them That being said, they all had a bink past two, I hated it, but they all turned out fine with no lasting effects so... Anyway, if you are really ready my suggestion is to get all the binkys out of the house. All of them. No temptation for you when your heart breaks because she is crying. When they are no longer there you can say "the binkys are all gone and I don't have anymore. We can look, but I don't think we'll find any" Of course you have to make sure there are none lurking under the bed or in corners. My littlest son had one left and he lost it. We actually looked for it and couldn't find it and he was distracted. I found it and put it in a drawer up high. He asked for it several times that day and we looked together with him in the lead. Each time we came up empty. He'd whine a little, but again, he became distracted. He did really cry for it 3 or 4 times over the next 2 days, especially at bed time, but we would look each time and he could see that it was really lost and he knew it was the last one. By the third day he would only mention it in passing and by the time a week was up he stopped asking at all. Over the next several months he would occassionaly ask and I would just repeat the procedure, but it was half hearted on his attempt.
Good luck. This is a tough one on the bumpy road we all travel.

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E.B.

answers from Washington DC on

Hi J.! We have a binky lover in our house, who also only uses it at bedtime, but after trying once to get rid of it we decided that since it makes her so comforted at night that she can have it until SHE decides she doesn't need it. So, after going 4 full weeks without it we noticed that her naps were shorter and she was generally more "miserable." Plus, at the time she had a cold and the cold lasted a really long time because she wasn't getting adequate naps in (I stay home with her.) Anyway, we figured that since it calms her so much she can have it as long as she thinks she needs it. I've never seen a kindergartner with a binky so I'm not worried. Plus, I wouldn't be able to cut her thumb off if she was a thumb sucker so I figure limiting it for sleeping only is the best we can do. I think once she drops her naps she'll be able to drop the binky too. Best of luck with whatever you decide!

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R.H.

answers from Norfolk on

Yes just tell her that she's a big girl now and it's time to get rid of the binky and throw it away. She's old enough to understand what you are talking about and will try to convice you to retrieve it but don't give in. Just throw them all away and be done with it. Contrary to most beliefs it's easier to do away with these when you do a big change like that because you can link it to it. You can say Since you are a big enough girl for a big girl bed you don't need this anymore huh? Ok well lets get rid of it. When you transfer these things with the bed you are using it to mask the fear of the new bed. You are just intensifying the getting rid of it when you do. Because now it's has memories of being with her during a big event.
If that makes since. good luck

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A.G.

answers from Washington DC on

Congrats on expecting a second baby. This story sounds like a carbon copy of my son. We are at 22 months and he has had bouts when he is ok with the binky only in bed rule and times when it had been difficult for him to leave it behind (usually when he is sick or teething). He also doesn't even ask for it or sleep with it at Kids Day Out which means that he doesn't really need it. I've been thinking about going cold turkey, but both my Ped and Dentist said that its ok to give him a little more time. I just try to honor the only in bed/car rule as much as possible. I usually take him to his pacifier instead of bringing it out of the room when he is having a hard time. We also give in ocassionaly when he is having a really bad day, but once he is calm we get him involved in something and sneak it away. His twin sister spontaneously gave it up last week so there is definitely hope.

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