How to Get My 8 Year Old to Wake up in the Night When She Needs to Pee?

My son had the same issue he was a very deep sleeper. He wet the bed until 11 years old. Limiting fluids before bed time helped. He just grew out if it. They say it’s a sign of high IQ and genetic. She must be in REM sleep and a vivid dreamer.

you seem to want to appeal to logic. there's not a training system to get her brain and her urethra to talk to each other.

she's not 'too old' for pullups if she needs them, right?

dragging a child who is 'deadweight' to the bathroom sounds awfully counter-productive.

i get that it's frustrating, but for some kids it just takes years for the neurons to click. i'd be briskly sympathetic and practical about this. you don't want her to feel ashamed about it, and you don't want to project any impatience or aggravation about it.

when her pullups stay dry for a month, she's probably ready to try going without 'em.

khairete
S.

She is NOT too old for pull ups or night time aides to keep her dry. After the age of 12 or 13 them she might be getting into the range where you talk to your pediatrician about some help.

Have her use the restroom before bed, have her put on the pull up, layer the bed with plastic sheet/fitted sheet, plastic sheet/fitted, plastic sheet/fitted (three sets will easily fit on a bed) and lay out a dry pair of pajamas and another pull up. Oh, and a spare blanket.

Then in the middle of the night no need to wake you if she wakes up wet. She changes her wet pajamas and then strips a layer off her bed to have dry sheets. (I made sure all wet items were placed in the bathroom on the tile or in the tub because they could wait until morning to go in the washer.)

As you can tell...I have been through this and the only thing I had to do was run some sheets and pajamas through the wash in the morning. No pressure on my child and by age 9-ish it was no longer happening. But I never made a big deal out of it....it is normal it happens...and my child was able to handle it by age 7 without waking me. Good luck!!

My youngest son had this problem as well as my nephew and my brothers. This is something that is pretty common but not discussed much because parents a lot of times are ashamed or thing there is something they are doing wrong. With my son we waited till he was about 10 then his pediatrician referred us to a pediatric urologist. I don't like doing a lot of meds if I can keep from it but this is one that we choose was best for him. It was not a instant fix. We had to work on what dose worked and also ended up adding a second med that together the 2 worked great. He was on meds for about 3 years. Once he turned 13 he asked to try to stop taking it. So we put mattress covers back on his bed and gave him a goodnight pullup to wear for a few nights to see if he was going to have problems. He did not. The dr told us that it is a hormone issue. That his body was not creating the hormone that told his brain to hold it or wake him up as he is a VERY sound sleeper.
Please talk to her dr. trying to wake her up at night is probably just making things worse because she will be so tired and so will you.

Some kids have bed wetting issues till they are 12 or 13 years old.
Ask any pediatrician and they'll tell you the same thing.
It often runs in families so ask your mom and MIL how old you were (and your husband was) when you could stay dry through the night.
It's a matter of brain/bladder maturity and you can't make hers mature any faster than her natural pace.

I know you are frustrated but she won't be going off to college and still be wetting the bed.
Waking her up at night just makes everyone tired and it doesn't help - so please stop - she needs her sleep and you need yours.
Keep a mattress protector on her bed and pullups are a big help to get you/her through this.
Be patient - and don't shame her - this isn't something anyone can control.

I'm not sure if I'm understanding this correctly, but you're trying to wake her in the night to take her to the washroom so that she can pee before she wets the bed? So is this just some random time midway through the night? I would think that would just be disturbing her sleep, and to let her continue to use the pull ups (or Good Nights) until such a time as she outgrows it.

Kids naturally develop at their own pace, and kids will outgrow this when their bodies mature. For some kids, it's not until later. I would talk to her pediatrician.

My son was like this. He could fall asleep on the couch and we could literally toss him up to his top bunk and he would not wake up, not even a murmur. He wet the bed until he was about 10 or 11. He used the Good NIghts. One day he just gave me a package not yet opened and told me he didn't need them anymore. We talked to the doc. Since it was only night and he was such a sound sleeper. there was nothing "wrong" with him. Sometimes it takes time. We were told not to force him to wake up to go since that could cause loss of sleep. We tried the no drinks after a certain time, it did not work. and a whole bunch of other advice. The one thing we did notice was that he would be dry all night. it was as he was waking that he wet. It took time for his mind to match his body.

Waking a child up to pee at night is NOT going to stop bedwetting. Please stop doing that to your child and please reconsider your attitude that she is "way to old for this." Your words clearly show that you are shaming and ashamed of your daughter. Do you somehow think she is doing this on purpose? Of course she isn't. And doesn't the fact that you can buy goodnights in such large sizes tell you that this is a fairly common issue? Geez . . .

She isn't going to walk down the aisle wearing goodnights for crying out loud. Aside from the fact that your pediatrician likely already told you that your daughter will outgrow this naturally (assuming you've even bothered to discuss this with him or her), you will quickly find out that the only issue here is your attitude about this from other posters on this board.

Set out some basic ground "rules" - your daughter needs to wear the goodnights until she is dry for two weeks straight (this will keep her bedding clean and her mattress safe). Let her know that this is super common and it WILL just stop one day. Show her where to throw them away and when to let you know when she is running low. Other than that, just stay out of it.

By the by, more often than not, a bedwetter has a parent who also was a bedwetter . . . if it wasn't you, I'd be asking her father how old he was when he stopped wetting the bed (better yet, if you want an honest answer, ask his mother). Chances are she will stop at the same age that the parent who wet the bed did.

"This, too, shall pass."

This is developmental. It's not something you can train them out of. Please talk to your pediatrician and perhaps a pediatric urologist - ask about nocturnal enuresis, which is nighttime bedwetting. My son had this and it is absolutely not something you can force them out of. And waking them up out of a deep sleep is actually damaging to their brain development. You may be creating a worse problem.

From my experience, alarms don't work. Although I'm the last person to jump for medication, I have to say that it was a lifesaver for us. Talk to the doctor, but we used a nighttime med called DDAVP after extreme frustration with underwear alarms (they wake you up AFTER you've peed - sort of counterproductive). My son did very well, slept at night, and got to go to sleepovers and summer camp. (We would send one pill with him to any slumber party, and alert the parent that he needed to take it - sometimes we explained the reason, sometimes we didn't, to make sure the parent didn't say anything to the other kids). He used the medication from age 7 to about 10, tried going off, and the problem came back. He went back on until age 12, when he successfully discontinued.

Please have an open and non-shaming conversation with the doctor. You'll learn a lot and your daughter will get good support.

Usually conquering dry nights is just a natural thing that nobody can decide when it would happen. It's something she or you cannot control, or better, if the causes are constipation, diabetes, bladder problems, UTI, then yes, you can cure it and stop the wet beds, otherwise if the causes are deep sleep (as you wrote) and/or a bladder still not completly grown there is nothing you can do.

Just don't make bedwetting a big issue, explain to her it's part of a natural body growth, she is not the only one, it's still a not so uncommon thing at 8yo, and take away all the shame. If I remember well 10% of 8yo kids still wet the bed.
So she is definitely not too old for pull-ups! It's plenty of pull-ups up to 12yo in all the grocery stores for a reason. Stop to think that about wearing protection, it could give her some kind of shame about, just use pull-ups until she is consistently dry as a good way to reduce stress, embarrasment and additional work in the morning.
You need just to wait and be patient, if it's just for deep sleep even waking her in the night or limiting fluid after dinner won't do a thing, or even be counterproductive. I went through that so I can relate, I hope that helps.

Have you taken her to a urologist to make sure there are no medical conditions? If so and she is fine, then you have to wait for her body to grow and catch up before she will stop night wetting. Disturbing her sleep can cause more problems.

At 8, she is still in the normal age range for night time wetting. Wearing pull ups is appropriate. Have a spare set of bedding handy and use waterproof mattress covers. There are a lot of kids just like her.

My 10 year old was like that till she was 7. We asked our doctor about it. He said that since it was an ongoing issue, he wasn't concerned about it being her kidneys or anything, so he gave her this nasal spray that she used for a year. It kept her dry all night, then eventually her body just "trained" itself to stay dry at night. I would definitely talk to her doctor about it. My daughter even went to a sleepover and I had to quietly tell her friend's parents about it and leave pull ups with them. And I also tried waking my daughter up to pee, but that was not happening. lol.