How to Find Desperately Needed ME TIME. Infant with a Newly Dia. Peanut Allergy

I always thought that kids weren't supposed to have peanuts till 2? What kind of daycare facility would he be in? Most work well with peanut allergies, they don't allow in outside food so that they can control that, and there should be someone that is trained with an EPI pen. He will have to get out into the world at sometime, and you need to too. If it was the lock down mode, I could understand, and I understand the fear of the allergy, but after a year, I think you may go crazy if you can't get out of the house.

Oy, sorry you've had such a hard year! I understand your husband's concern however, have you looked into which daycares in your area prohibit peanuts and tree nuts? My daughter's daycare controls the food which children are exposed to... meaning, they provide all snacks and lunches (except for jar food and formula for the infants). I would be surprised if all daycare facilities in your area allow peanuts and tree nuts in the room. Granted the cost of these types of daycares are more than those that don't feed the kids (and you might not necessarily feel the daycare's menu is as high in nutrition as the food you provide at home), but it is a viable alternative. Also, even though his past illnesses and food allergy are a valid concern, being that he has had minimal exposure to other children, you might want to mention to your husband that you are concerned about his socialization development.

If your need to return to work is more for a mental/emotional break instead of for income, then you could look at it like any salary you make can go towards in-home childcare. Another idea is for you would be to hire a nanny 2 or 3 times a week, which should allow you to work on those days?

Most childcare centers and schools are peanut free zones anymore. You can put him in 1/2 day childcare 2 days a week or if your gym has a daycare, find out if they are peanut free or take him there during an off-time where there aren't many children there. My kids go to the Goddard School in LITH and it's peanut free. Also, get him one of those health alert bracelets. There's a boy in my daughter's class who wheres one. The caregivers/teachers are trained to know how to react if something happens otherwise there would be a lot more SAHMs out there.
You can't live your life in a bubble.........Get out there!!!! Everyone needs a little me-time and with the way you've been cooped up, you REALLY need it!

Unless you wrap him into a bubble for a couple of more years, I suggest you talk to another doctor and find out some other solutions. You will go a little insane if this continues. Perhaps ease an additional person or two into your life who can stay with baby for even an hour while you go outside and breathe in fresh air. Not ever leaving can't be too healthy for baby either. Find out if there is anything at all besides whatever the first doctor told you-possible creams, clothing that he can where, etc. From what I understand the best way to fight germs is to get exposed to some of them. I have worked in schools for many years and I seldom get the everyday sickness (ok, I If you look me up I had cancer but that is not germ related)
That makes me so sad for both of you. There must be other doctors with different opinions. Not to mention that (and I don't know your circumstances) you might need to work. Good luck.

Hello. My son was diagnosed with severe peanut -- and in fact all nut allergies earlier this year just before he turned two. We found out when he was bitten by another child who had eaten something with peanut butter. We found a great allergist who has since tested him -- and we came up with a plan to send him to a nut free preschool which he just started this week. Although your child is young now and doesn't know that they shouldn't have xxx -- they will learn and fast. I did nurse for a year and then we transitioned to cow's milk. A word of advice -- you should have your child tested for both tree nuts and legumes (peanuts). They come from two different families -- until then I wouldn't try the almond milk another poster suggested.

I think you need to make a plan for getting out more often and having some "me time." What about trading care with another mom who is aware of your child's allergies - it might be a win-win for both of you.

Feel free to email me if you'd like.

I'm sorry for what you're going through. I have four kids, one with severe allergies, and a military husband who lives in another state. I certainly understand the need for me time. I'm not sure I've even been to the bathroom alone in the past 7 years. :) First of all, I would recommend continuing to breastfeed as long as possible, or at least pumping. That will help your son's immune system more than anything. If you do decide to give him an alternative, I would skip dairy in favor of rice or almond milk. My son has nut allergies, but does well with almonds. Dairy is a major allergen, and not as healthy as people think. I would also give him a good multi-vitamin, herbal calcium supplement, and probiotics. Dr Christopher has some great liquid vitamins and supplements available online. As for the me time, can your husband watch the kids a while so you can get out? What about another family member? How about joining a local playgroup or making friends with some other moms? I would tell anyone watching my child about his allergy and keep an epi-pen handy just in case. Some child care facilities don't even allow peanut butter for that reason. You could also try stealing a few moments of me time here and there at home. Find some activities for the kids to do together while you read, watch tv, or whatever you want to relax. One last thing, as I'm sure you know, kids grow so quickly. This season will pass before you know it. Best wishes!

B.

Here are a few suggestions for doing some "me time" hope it sparks some ideas:

http://www.theskinnyscoop.com/question/q/2270?utm_campaig...

Hi. Good for you to make your sons heatlh a priority - especially when you've had to make so many sacrifices for him. You've been on a long, rough road. It does get easier, but "normal" will never be the same if you have a child with a severe allergy. You and your family will find a new normal. I encourage you to either find a food allergy support group or some other moms of children with allergies. There is a LOT of misinformation out there (even in responses that other moms are giving you in this post). I found the book Food Allergies for Dummies (excellent author!) and The Peanut Allergy Answer book helpful. There are also great blogs by moms who have children with food allergies. Each child's allergy is at a different place on the spectrum - so you have to make decisions that are right for your family.

Like another mom said, it's great that your husband takes your sons allergy seriously. (Just asking, is there another way that you can get "Me time" without working at the gym?) You sound exhausted and frazzled - hang in there. This is especailly hard to go through when you have such young children.

You're not alone in this journey.

We live with food allergies here too. My son is contact allergic to milk, so if he touches a table where milk was spilled and not cleaned properly he will have a reaction. So I do see your husband's point of view about the daycare. Even if it is a peanut free zone, you do have to be concerned what the other kids have on their hands, etc.

That being said, do you know, and trust another mom you could trade a few hours of babysitting with? Maybe at your house so you are not worrying if your son is in their home and they have peanut items in the house.

All caregivers need to be trained in the use of an Epi-pen and what your "action plan" is concerning any reaction he may have.

They also have tons of stickers, alert bracelets, onesies, t-shirts, etc that say things like "please ask my mommy before feeding me, I have allergies"

When my child was first diagnosed I had a button I could put on his shirt, even to remind relatives NOT to give him anything.

You could put a post on Craigslist, seeking another mom with a child with a peanut allergy and see if she is in the same boat as you. I suggest this because I saw a mom that did that. Or see if your allergist has any type of bulletin board in their office and see if you can put up a sign there.Then trade sitting with her, believe me, peace of mind your child is with someone that will immediately know how to respond to a reaction and know to check every label, every time (ingredients can and do change) will make you feel so much better.

My own husband would not feed our son unless I left the food ready until he really got the hang of the whole allergy thing!

If you cannot work due to the child care at the gym, and have NO other option, then your husband needs to recognize HE needs to be home with the kids and figure a way for you to carve some "YOU" time into the week.
Then it gives you that chance to get out and do some errands, or exercise, etc.

Peanut allergies have become common. Most child care places do not allow peanuts on the premises. If the one at your club does, talk with management about restricting them. Always have and antihistamine and an epi-pen with you for just in case.

Is your baby extremely allergic, meaning that just a whiff of peanut off the hand of a child that had a peanut butter sandwich for lunch would cause an extreme reaction? I suggest that you talk with his allergist about how careful you must be.

My granddaughter who is now 10 was diagnosed with a peanut allergy when she was a baby. She also has asthma and eczema. She is no longer allergic to milk. She went to a regular preschool and is now in public school. Both places restrict peanuts. The school does give peanut butter sandwiches to kid who haven't paid for lunch. She's sat near them without having any difficulty. She has been exposed to peanuts when friends teased her by shoving a peanut butter cookie or sandwich in her mouth a couple of times but didn't have a negative reaction. She is old enough to say no and has been very good about protecting herself.

I suggest that you make arrangements with the child care so that he can be taken care of by them. Take an epi-pen and anti-histamine. Unless the allergist says that he cannot be around peanuts at all then I suggest that you take reasonable precautions but don't try to isolate him.

I also have a peanut allergy but have never had a negative reaction. I went into anti-phylaxis shock after having been bitten by several bees. I've since been bitten and haven't had a negative reaction.

You'll feel more comfortable with his allergies over time as you come to realize that it is rare for someone to seriously react but if they do, the epi-pen will stop the reaction. I often give my granddaughter an anti-histamine for her pollen allergies. I can see her asthma subside within a few minutes.

I'm sorry things are crazy for you right now. We have a peanut allergy too, though the severe reaction hasn't happened yet. Unfortunately, my husband doesn't see the potential severity of it which worries me. Be very thankful that yours does, and he's got your son's health in mind.

There are a lot of peanut-free day cares or ones that will adjust if asked. The only tricky part comes when parents bring in snacks; anything baked at a store is a potential threat and parents without kids who have the allergy think if it doesn't have nuts or peanut butter in it, it's okay. Kids should be required to wash hands upon entering a care facility as well as before and after snacks/meals. Mine's in first grade now. It's been a bit nerve-wracking with eating lunch at school, but the school's working with us (except for making every kid wash hands after eating).

I'm nodding in sympathy -- I understand! I have two older daughters, now 9 and 7, and a 3 year old son. My daughters were super easy babies. My son was not. When he was 6 months old he was diagnosed with a peanut allergy. We had lots of horrible illnesses too, although no hospital stays. I wondered if I would ever get a life back. It gets better!!! In fact, it turned out to be a good thing that we learned he had a peanut allergy, since my oldest has it too but we never knew. I think it was that we had lived with a nut allergy successfully for 6 years without ever knowing that helped. We have never had a problem, never had an accidental exposure. Our reaction is severe, and we carry an epipen, but I do not avoid products made in factories that also process nuts and my one child who can eat nuts had peanut butter almost every day and we have never had a problem. I will say that the daycare at our gym is a hotbed of germs and our little guy catches something nasty almost everytime he goes there so I don't like him to go any more (but we've never had a problem with nuts, just horrible respiratory infections.) Your allergist may be able to guide you, and maybe a support group for kids w/ allergies? Good luck!

Oh. poor mama. ya'll have been through a lot!

As for the peanut allergy, your life will be about dilligence. Read all labels. Lots of hand washing, educating. My son has a tree nut allergy, so we avoid all nuts. There are public 'nut free' daycares out there. You could also look into hiring a nanny that would come to your house while you are working. There are options that would give you a bit of your independence back.

Hugs.
M.

I'm with you on this one! My daughter was diagnosed with a peanut allergy at 13 months and it has been very challenging to say the least. I've found a way to gain a bit of "normalcy" back into our lives, but it will still be quite a journey. Check out our story if you'd like and I can pass on the info for the program if you're interested :)

J.
www.delaniesdoggy.org