How to Deal with Labor and Delivery

epidural!

have someone there with you who you trust and can be yourself around. I had my husband there. whoever is there should be someone who will take orders from you if you give them, and should be someone you will listen to and follow instructions from if you get to where you need that.

don't let the staff push you around. be insistent about what you want.

once you find something that works, stick with it. I found that yelling "IT HURTS!" over and over again at the top of my lungs was the only way to keep on top of the pain until the drugs arrived. I also found that I didn't want sympathy from anyone while I was yelling.

Forget all the stuff you learned in birthing class, if you took one. We didn't use any of it. Any old breathing is fine if you want to use breathing as a technique. The key is to focus on the breathing instead of the pain. Works well in the early stages.

When they tell you how to push, do it exactly as they say. Sounds gross when they say to push like you're pooping, but it really does speed things up a lot. Makes it a lot easier. (Sorry for the gross factor, but I think it's important to not fight your own body being squeamish during delivery!)

Hope that helps. But I know you will do fine!
Hugs and mental support,
jen

I planned on and epidural also, BUT by the time I got to the hospital it was too late! On the day I delivered I was up a 6am cleaning and doing laundry. At about 10 I started to feel a bit crampy but I thought my son was just falling into place. By noon my mom swore I was in labor so we called the Dr. They told us to time out the "cramps" and call back in an hour. I lasted about 30 mins and called again. They said to come in and get checked out. I threw a bag together, I wasn't due for 3 more weeks, and went in. An hour later I delivered my son. I've been told it's not so common to go so fast with the first one but every person is different. All I can really tell you is good luck and I wish you a fast and painless delivery!!!

I agree with the response listen to your body and be open to anything. Let the nurses know up front how you feel even if you aren't sure how that is.

Both my boys were all natural-- not by choice! First one was so fast no time- water broke at 730 he was born at 920. I had been in labor all day but not enough to stop activity until just before water broke.

Second water broke at 1023. I got to hospital and told nurse I want drugs!. She said I was only a 3 and it was too early. She was quite patronizing. Well that was at 11:20 and my son delivered himself in the hallway on way to delivery room at 11:45

So...to reiterate- be ready for anything. Feel free to tell them what you think and how you feel. YOU are the mommy! THEY are YOUR doctors and the doctors for YOUR baby! YOU get to call the shots!

Being a mom ROCKS! Start taking charge now and you will feel impowered to do what is right for you and your family.

Good luck and scream if you want to :)

I have had 2 babies and cannot even BEGIN to imagine doing it drug-free! I even got an epidural headache after the 1st one and still don't regret it. In my opinion, your body goes through so much with pregnancy, give yourself a break and take whatever they'll give you if you are afraid of pain. Honestly, why hurt if you don't have to?
With my first, I was induced 3 weeks early and my body was not ready. It was a long, hard, very painful labor and I didn't think I could go on until they started up giving me pain relief, first through the IV and then through an epidural.
With my second, he was 1 day late and the labor and delivery went so well, he almost delivered himself, but I did get an epidural when i could no longer walk and talk through the contractions. HEAVEN!
Also, I know I may get a lot of moms angry for me for saying this, but don't feel guilty letting your baby sleep in the nursery the first night so you can get a good night's sleep. you will be exhausted and it will most likely be your last chance to sleep through the night for the next the next several months to a year. Your baby will be in good hands will not be emotionally scarred because you did one last nice thing for yourself before devoting your life to your new bundle of joy.
Good luck!

I had my first baby on Sept 11, 2007! I planned on doing it without pain meds, but was open to using them if I really needed to. But I went 100% pain-med free and was so happy about it. I never really take any pain med in daily life, but giving birth is a whole new ball game, so go with what works for you. But I believe that the support of your husband (who may be as freaked out as you are) and the nurses goes a long way. And I was so excited to meet my son! The day I had my baby, I got up and showered/dressed for work, thinking I just had a little bit of a belly ache and cramps. First time mom ;) Once I started timing my contractions, they were 4 minutes apart and we headed to the hospital. We got checked in around 7:45 AM and he was born at 1:13 PM. Pretty fast for a first-time baby. When we checked in I was 7 cm dilated(!!) but I still had to push for close to 2 hours. The birth process was not bad, but recovering afterwards was a pian-literally. I tore a lot and it was hard to sit/bathe....for a few weeks after. Best of luck to you!!

I highly recommend the epidural. I had back labor with both my children and don't think I could have made it without the epidural. With both of my children I only had to push a few times at most 10 minutes so I can't speak about what it is like to push for hours as some women do, but if you have an epidural you will have it before you get to the point of pushing, so don't worry. That part won't be an excruciating scene like on TV. I'm not going to lie to you and tell you it is a painless breeze, but once I received my epidural my troubles were over. I just wished they would have seen fit to give it to me earlier. My advice is to talk to your doctor about your fears. My doctor talked to the nurses before I got to the hospital with my first child about my fear and they were especially gentle and kind with me.

C.,

Don't think about the pain. Our culture has readied us to think that labor and delivery are horrible things to be endured. What you decide will be fine for you, but don't fear the pain. Fear makes us do things we might not normally do.

I had my first son with an epidural and it was fine. I had my second naturally and it was amazing. The pain wasn't so bad, I barely remember it actually. What I do remember is thinking after I had him was that I wanted to do that again... not what I thought after my first pitocin/epidural labor and delivery.

Good luck to you, and trust your body.

J.

I just had a baby boy in Auguest. He was my first also. I had been told by everyone how great an epidural was so after being in pain for a while i did get the epidural. It was wonderful and i highly recommend getting one if possible. They had to shut mine off after pushing for 3 hours though because I could not feel anything. Once it was off he came right out. I was very glad I had the epidural because it really helped me be able to relax so I was able to save some energy for pushing. Congratulations on your baby. Im sure everything will go just fine for you.

I don't know about epidurals and what you can and can't do, but for me, laboring in a warm bath with jets felt so good i didn't even think to ask for an epidural until i was ready to push, and since i made it that far i just said 'forget it' cause i didn't want to deal with the after affects of pain meds. Another tip is calm music and make sure your birthing partner brings a breath mint haha. Sorry the coffee breath just got to me in the moment. Also bring your baby book so they can put a foot print in there while they are doing it for the birth certificate. And a cold wash cloth on the forehead feels good, and be assertive and instructive to your birthing assistants. I guess I would say to be open to a non-epidural. The pain never got as bad as i thought it would but it's different for everyone. Also peoples fears impact how the actual event plays out.

Congratulations!! I found out today I'm pregnant with #2! Anyway, everyone's labor and delivery are different so what works for one, may not work for you. It's great to have a birth plan but be ready for the unexpected! If things don't go as planned, don't stress, just go with the flow. Baby and your body have a mind of their own when it's time to deliver! I wanted to be able to walk around during labor but ended up strapped to monitors, stuck in bed. I didn't want an epidural but ended up having to have one because my blood pressure got too high (I had pregnancy induced hypertension). I just went with the flow. I will say I would not have survived before the epidural without my birthing ball!!! I recommend one to everyone! Remember, labor and birth are natural processes (not medical 'problems' as so many of us have turned them into). Mothers have been giving birth since the beginning of time!

C.,

I hand an epidural with both my kids. The first was kind of neat, because they way it went in, I still had control over my legs and I could feel when to push but it didn't hurt. (it had to do with the way it went in.).

My second, barely had time to work before my son pushed his way into the world. He came very quickly once I got dilated all the way. I was in pain from the contractions, but honestly today I can barely remember what the pain flet like.

You will have so much support from your delivery partner and your nursing staff, you will be able to push. If you choose the epidural, it will most likely take effect in time and you won't have to worry about the pain while pushing.

The only suggestions I have for you before all the main delivery starts, is make the room comfortable for you. Close the shades and have the lights dim if that's what makes you comfortable. Only let the amount of people in the room you are comfortable with. I let company in during the initial labor, but when it was time to push I had everyone but my husband leave. My sister in law on the other hand let my mom and her mom and others in the room while she was pushing.

Congratulations! and relax, everything will be fine!

T.

C.,

I have 3 kids:

#1 was 7 lbs 14 oz
#2 was 9 lbs 9.6 oz (induced 3 days early)
#3 was 10lbs 4oz (induced 3 days early)

The first 2 I had NO pain meds. I am sorry but it hurt. I am going to be honest. With my first I had no idea what to expect. It actually took me like 3 hours to push her out because I couldn't stand the pain and wouldn't push because it hurt so bad. Well with #2 I knew what to expect and I knew what the pain was going to be like. However, with this one, I also knew that the faster I pushed, than the faster the pain goes away. I pushed him out in 15 minutes.

We with #3, I said from the get go that I was going to have an epidural. Everyone that had one told me how great they were and since this was my last kid, I wanted to see if it was true...lol

I got the epidural and ahhhhh the contraction pains went away. Than a few hours later I felt my water break. The first dose of epidural wore off and they came and gave me more meds through the IV because the pain was coming back. I guess everyone is different, but I could feel the pressure of the baby going down. I was even able to tell the nurse that it was time to push. I actually had to stop myself from pushing until the doctor got there.

Well it came time to push and I didn't want to because I was feeling pain "down there" from the babies head. Oh and when I said it hurts and the epidural isn't helping, the doctor than said "oh, you will still feel the baby coming out, your not totally numb". I again at this point didn't want to push anymore because it hurt, I told them to "just pull her out", as I did with my other 2 kids. Well of coarse it isn't that easy. So I just got it in my head that if I just keep pushing she will come out. With my first 2, once the head came out the rest followed. Well with my 3rd, I had to push her out all the way down to her little butt (she was the 10lbs 4oz one). I pushed for 11 minutes (I was proud of myself)!!!

Now that I have probably scared you, I have this to say... Once the baby is out, the pain goes away and you get to see the little one that has been growing inside you these past 9 months and realize it was all worth it!!!!

Congrats and let us know what you have!!!!

C., seriously consider using no drugs. You will be able to move around with labor and you won't if you use meds. It is the best for your baby that way too. It allows your baby to move into position. An epidural WILL increase your chances of needing a c-section. I had 2 home births with a midwife and let me tell you, no drugs will leave you feeling amazing after birth. Trust your body to know what to do! It was made to give birth. Relax as best you can and let your body open up to birth your baby. The idea of 'waves' is a perfect explanation. Remember it will not last forever. There is an end to the 'waves' of labor. And get the thought of 'pain' out of your head. It is an uncomfortable sensation but it has a purpose. Good Luck!

Trust your body, be open to anything, make sure you get YOUR voice heard when delivering, and know that the "mommy amnesia" does exist...minutes after the pain went away I couldn't describe the exact feeling anymore. But I say be open to anything because even the best of plans get blown away when Baby decides to come and I've seen moms lose it because it's not the way they wanted or expected. You'll do great...congrats!!

I wanted a natural labor (no drugs). We tried everything but baby girl was stuck sunny side up and I ended up with a c-section. I had a duala who was also a massage therapist so she knew alot of massage techniques that really helped.

Don't be afraid to ask for drugs, but hold off as long as you can on them. I used Nubain first to take the edge off and eventually got an epidural. I didn't feel a thing with the epi. It didn't even hurt to get it put in. Just don't let it wear off because if you are concerned about pain at that time, you probably won't get ahead of the pain in time.

Use breathing and counter-pressure during the contractions to help you hold off from the drugs. Back labor is not comfortable so counter pressure (on the lower back and sides of hips)during contractions will really help alleviate pain to an extent to make it bearable. Keep moving as much as you can before the epi. to get through contractions. Use a birthing ball, standing, walking, massage, anything to keep your mind off the pain.

Good luck and enjoy your baby! If you plan to breast feed, ask for lanolin immediately, you will need it.

I had expected to be induced as my doctor was going out of town the day after my due date, however my daughter had other plans. 2 days before the due date I baked cookies all day and took a nap. Good thing I did. When I woke and took a shower, my water broke and I was on my way to the hospital for a night of labor.

I did get an epidural, and didn't have any pain until the next day. My baby cracked my pelvis on the way out and so there was pain associated with that.

As many others have stated, you can never be sure what will happen, but have confidence that all will be alright and listen to what your body is telling you. If you can handle no epi than good for you! For some women, like my sister, they don't work anyway. GOOD LUCK!

I agree with everyone that every labor is different but just take this advice...don't feel bad to get an epidural and get it early! Why should we suffer? If we were going into surgery we would have anesthesia wouldn't we? It doesn't hurt the baby and I think the stress of a mother going through pain could be more harmful on the baby. With both my kids I got an epidural at 1 cm. With my first, my water broke but nothing progressed. After a few hrs they decided to give me pitocin to move things along and I opted for an epidural prior to starting that. I literally slept through my labor other than the nurse coming through every couple of hours to check on the progress. I pushed for 2 hours with no problems being able to push and feel the sensation of pushing. Total labor time from start of pitocin - 8 hrs.

With my second I was induced and my doctor allowed me to get the epidural prior to the pitocin. A nurse talked me into waiting for the epidural until they could see the pitocin was working because sometimes the pitocin doesn't work and they send you home. I didn't wait long though and was getting it within 1 hr of starting the pitocin. Makes life easier! Watched a movie, felt the baby move down, paged the nurse/doctor and in 2 pushes he was out. Total labor time from start of pitocin and then shortly getting the epidural was about 4-5 hrs. So the myth that epidurals slow down labor is not necessarily true.

Walk. Walk walk walk while in labor and you'll find you probalby wont need the epidural. When you lay in bed, all you can do is sit and feel the ocntractions and your body can't handle them as well. if you are up moving, not only is gravity in your favor with dialating, but your body is able to relax and move through the contractions.

I have two boys, my first was 12 hours of labor and I was never told to get up and walk around and while the labor and delivery was ok, I was dissapointed in the situation, I was uncomfortable nad settled for an epidural when I didn't really want one. With my youngest his labor was only about 4 hours, and I walked the whole time, standing in the room, birthing ball, rockign chair, and I dialated very fast, no epidural, and he was born very quickly because I could feel th contractions and pushing. I was much happier with his labor and birth b ecause I was i ncontrol, I had a wonderful nurse who encouraged me to walk around.

So my advice, is walk and stay mobile, don't get an epi right away or you'll be stuck in bed that whole time!

I've had four children, and I used pain meds everytime, it helped me relax and my babies came quick because I was able to relax, my longest labor was 4 hours, shortest was an hour. I was induced with three out of the 4. I did not get an epidural, (sp) because I didn't trust the hospitals techs, but I got meds through my IV. I had a little pain, but once the baby gets there you forget all about it.. Congrats on the new baby!!

Espect Nothing! I had a perfect delivery pictured with my first, and ended up having a c-section. Now with #2, I'm having a planned c-section. So,...don't expect anything and don't have a plan. Often, if people have a plan, that's when it falls apart.

C., I agree with everyone who says not to expect anything for sure. Labor and delivery is so unpredicable. The most important thing is to trust your body. I have given birth twice without epidurals and it really is quite amazing what you can handle and how your body takes over. Don't be concerned about pushing. When you get to that point, it really doesn't hurt, the urge to push is so overwhelming. If you want to try without drugs, by all means go for it. If you want an epidural, insist on it! Nubain works well too. And it is true, you will forget the pain of labor as soon as it is over. Good luck!

Epidurals are your friend. You will be feeling no pain! Before you get the drugs, however, it is a different story. If you're worried about being in pain, let the nurse know right away that you want the epidural ASAP. The only thing that sucks is that once you get it, you're stuck in bed. Bring some movies or music.

And really, before you know it, it will all be over, you'll have your darling little baby, and you won't remember what you went through to get to that point. I remember telling my husband that I certainly didn't enjoy it, but if they made me do it again, I wouldn't hesitate--it was well worth it.

Women have been doing this for 1000s of years w/o drugs or hospitals. You'll do great! Good luck and best wishes!

I have been reading the posts and laughing my head off! You got FABULOUS advice from everyone! I wish that someone would have told me how much it hurts! Everyone I talked to said,"It's the most wonderful thing, it doesn't really hurt that bad," and my favorite "It's worth it" It totally IS worth it but while you are in labor you really question that:)Pain does funny things to you! That saying, I was going to go totally natural b/c I had NO IDEA what I getting into. 72 hrs of labor, 5 hrs. pushing I couldn't WAIT for the drugs! I told the anestheiologist that he was beautiful! The second time around was a breeze- I didn't have time for drugs. You just never can tell what will happen but don't try to be a hero! I love what all the other said, don't have any expectations and don't be disappointed in yourself if things don't turn out like you hoped. You get a great present in the end! CONGRATULATIONS!

i had an epidural and was so numb we had to turn it down so i could feel enough to push. and i barely felt anything then. if your epidural works, you'll be fine! still go to labor class, etc. and everything, though, just to make sure you have the coping skills to get to 5cm before you can get your epi. plus, sometimes they don't work, and you want to have some sort of backup plan as to how to handle pain.

C.,
First congrats on the baby to be. I am a mom of seven and I have never received any meds during labor. Each person is different and each birth is different!! I think you will be surprised at yourself once you are going through it!! If you feel tired just remind yourself that you want to see that new little one!! Make sure to take things that will help you focus!! My biggest allied was my husband and just knowing that he was there and helping me out was always the reassure I needed. The doctor and nurses are very good as well. Don't be afraid to ask for something or questions!! I am sure they have seen and heard almost everything. Have a positive attitude that you can do it because you can!!

I wish you the best of luck with everything. As far as the epidural (sp) goes I am not much help. My husband did go in with his sister and helped her while she got her's put in but then left for the birth. His mom and sister helped with that part.

Take care!!

A.

First I wouldn't get the epidural, you have no sensation to push and don't know if you are pushing or not so delivery takes longer. I gave birth to my first February 5th, like you I had no idea what to expect. I was in labor for 12 hours and pushed for 10 min, the contractions started out small only lasting about 30 to 45 seconds but they were vary close together, like 2 to 4 min apart. Once I hit transition the contractions were very strong the pain went all the way into my hip bones and down my thighs, that was the only time I wanted something for the pain, unfortunately I was still at home and had no pain medication. When we got to the hospital I was 8 cm dilated and delivered without any medication. When you actually give birth it feels like the baby is coming out of your but and not your vagina, its really weird. I hope that help you with what to expect while in labor. GOOD LUCK!!!

I agree with the mom's who say not to have a birth plan. Just see how you feel when you are at the hospital. I am a NICU nurse and have attended hundreds of deliveries. I have seen just about every kind of birth. We have a joke at the hospital that if you come in with a birth plan...a majority of the time, it's not going to go according to plan! I went into my birth experiences thinking that I was going to try and do things naturally. It didn't take me long to realize that wasn't for me. I ended up with both of my kids being delivered while having an epidural. Don't be disappointed in yourself. No matter what you decide to do...things will be fine in the end. You will end up with a beautiful baby! I've seen babies being born without the mom having any epidural... and the mom didn't make a sound. I thought that "she's a champ!" I've seen babies being born with the mom trying to deliver her baby naturally and the mom refused to push at the end because the pain was too bad for her...I thought "I wish she would have taken something for the pain so she wouldn't be putting her baby at risk". My thoughts are that it's more risky to try and be tough than to just have an epidural and relax and enjoy the experience. I'm sure it was a woman who invented the epidural! If it would make you more comfortable...go for it. You don't need to be a superhero!

You already have so much advice, but I guess I will add mine. I bet you are so ready, I know I was with all of my three. All three of my labors and deliveries were very different. I have had all types, the epidural for many hours, epidural right before pushing and my last all natural. It is painful! Try to stay calm, with my last I used the idea of a wave to keep me calm. The pain comes like a wave, I used to live in california so this worked for me. But the wave starts small, building, it peaks,and is it heading toward the shore it breaks. Maybe that anaolgie will help, but the most important part of labor is you being comfortable, and safe, so you and the baby are healthy. I can honestly tell you that I felt amazing after delevering my son with no drugs, it was the best I felt after any of my deiveries. I could of ran a marathon. I send you and your family goood thoughts and wish for a wonderful and healthy delivery.

Hi,

I jsut gave birth in September and I was induced. They started inducing me and the pain came shortly after. It was so bad that in the middle of the night I was on all fours in pain. And with being induced the contractions where right on top of each other for about 30 minutes and then I got about 5 mnutes of relief jsut to start all over. During this time they let me take a shower and let me tell you I didnt want to get out it helped so much. I actaully missed my doctor calling me twice because I wouldnt get out of the shower.

I planned on getting an epidural but I had to wait until I was dialted to 4 and i was maybe at two 12 hours after being induced. Well I guess the pain was so bad (It was my first I didnt know) my nurse called my doctor and asked to start the epidural early.

I never even saw the needle(suggest that) and once the epiduaral was in I felt nothing it was great. I actaully was able to sleep and talk with people. The bad part its hard to even pick up your legs but still worth it. My hips started to hurt after a while but that is because I was laying for so long my body just ached nothing major.

Once my darling daughter finally decided she wanted to come out I felt a little pain (they reduce teh epidural a little) but nothing horrible.

Another hint a frined told and my doctor right before pushing is to push like you have to poop. Which is a good suggestion but noone told me where to push. Well I found out about after 2 hours of pushing.. I could feel one area of pain nothing horrendous but I could feel it and I switched and decided to push that pain out and out came Emma!!! All of that only took 36 hours. I think the worst part was getting induced it took way to long!!!!

My long story short it will hurt get an epidural ASAP!

Good luck in the end whatever pain you go through is worth it!